We Means It, Maaaaaan: The Baltimore Orioles of 2021

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A truly anonymous bunch of who-are-theys while we wait for Adley -- but also a lot of young players whose future certainly isn't set in stone. They didn't finish last in 2020. Can they finish not-last again?

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 5 April 2021 00:29 (one year ago) link

Starting the season with a commanding 3-game sweep of the Red Sox, who did finish last in 2020, is a good way to start.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 5 April 2021 00:29 (one year ago) link

up to 0.2% now

, Monday, 5 April 2021 03:48 (one year ago) link

at a loss as to why fangraphs thinks the red sox are 15 games better

mookieproof, Monday, 5 April 2021 04:05 (one year ago) link

So you're saying there's a chance

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 5 April 2021 04:08 (one year ago) link

well they've got Bogaerts, Devers, a real catcher, a couple potentially great pitchers returning from injury, and some high upside guys

we just have guys

, Monday, 5 April 2021 04:30 (one year ago) link

weird to see all this outfield depth...not even accounting for positional tweeners.

j.q higgins, Monday, 5 April 2021 13:29 (one year ago) link

If you're gonna get outhit 13-4 it's good to get those hits at the right times

Guayaquil (eephus!), Thursday, 8 April 2021 02:56 (one year ago) link

If they blow this

Guayaquil (eephus!), Saturday, 17 April 2021 02:36 (one year ago) link


Guayaquil (eephus!), Saturday, 17 April 2021 02:40 (one year ago) link

Satisfying win last night, though I can't say it feels like you're watching an almost-.500 team.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 18 April 2021 19:23 (one year ago) link

What if John Means is actually good though?

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 18 April 2021 20:29 (one year ago) link

^-- Seriously, what if he is?

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 25 April 2021 22:42 (one year ago) link

that's...good. definitely on a hell of a run.

j.q higgins, Monday, 26 April 2021 16:15 (one year ago) link

matt harvey!

mookieproof, Tuesday, 27 April 2021 01:56 (one year ago) link

There are a lot of ways I love to win a ballgame but hilariously bad baserunning by the New York Yankees is right up there among the very best

Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 27 April 2021 02:35 (one year ago) link

mullins is 15 for 35 against LHP this year after giving up switch hitting

he was 14 for 111 against LHP trying to bat righty from 2018-2020

, Tuesday, 27 April 2021 02:50 (one year ago) link

mullins is such a great story. like, even he were just to be just average offensively the rest of the season, that's still a really valuable guy to have w/ his defensive skills. him, hays and mckenna would be so fun to watch out there.

j.q higgins, Tuesday, 27 April 2021 10:57 (one year ago) link

Another Mullins GWRBI

Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 30 April 2021 03:44 (one year ago) link

i've seen maybe three orioles games this year, which have led me to believe that mullins has a 1.500 OPS

mookieproof, Friday, 30 April 2021 03:51 (one year ago) link

John Means getting a W to kick off May Day is pic.twitter.com/sT6ZkWOwTW

— Lindsay Ballant (@lindsayballant) May 1, 2021

mookieproof, Saturday, 1 May 2021 05:14 (one year ago) link

That so felt like the kind of game we would have given up on and lost 1-0 in recent years. God it would be great if Kremer could pitch this way all the time instead of briefly flashing his ability to do it and then losing track of it for weeks on end.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 4 May 2021 14:40 (one year ago) link

too busy arguing with people at work to even know there was a no-hitter going on, would've been the first O's one i'd ever seen

, Wednesday, 5 May 2021 22:55 (one year ago) link

still think we should trade him at the deadline :)

, Wednesday, 5 May 2021 22:55 (one year ago) link

What if John Means is actually good though?

― Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, April 18, 2021 3:29 PM (two weeks ago) bookmarkflaglink

^-- Seriously, what if he is?

― Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, April 25, 2021 5:42 PM (one week ago) bookmarkflaglink

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 5 May 2021 23:18 (one year ago) link

Sort of sucks that the Orioles are probably going to finish last again while playing authentically kind of respectable baseball, but that's this division, four pretty good teams in here with us.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 11 May 2021 02:14 (one year ago) link

Cedric Mullins is arguably the best runner in the bigs pic.twitter.com/dFUhFa9LsQ

— Clinton Yates (@clintonyates) May 11, 2021

amazing hustle, but I’m not sure how this isn’t a three-base error

k3vin k., Tuesday, 11 May 2021 03:22 (one year ago) link

that is awesome; he rules

mookieproof, Tuesday, 11 May 2021 03:27 (one year ago) link

I am ready for the Means - Mullins - Hunter Harvey - Rutschman era

Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 11 May 2021 16:07 (one year ago) link

The bullpen has been pretty good but they are sure trying to waste another great Means start right now

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 12 May 2021 02:15 (one year ago) link

What a brutal week. At least we get to play some other bad teams for a couple of series. And at least we had that comeback win against New York.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 21 May 2021 22:24 (one year ago) link

at a loss as to why fangraphs thinks the red sox are 15 games better

― mookieproof, Monday, April 5, 2021 12:05 AM (one month ago)

red sox have been 15 games better just since i wrote this


mookieproof, Wednesday, 26 May 2021 19:59 (one year ago) link

Awesome, so we'll pace them the rest of the season

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 26 May 2021 20:26 (one year ago) link

What the hell happened

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 30 May 2021 15:58 (one year ago) link


getting there...

, Sunday, 30 May 2021 18:10 (one year ago) link

if we get to 0-21 that can only mean good things for next year

, Sunday, 30 May 2021 18:11 (one year ago) link

Smart of SI to crop that picture so you can't see the bottom of the bat handle

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 30 May 2021 18:11 (one year ago) link

on the plus side: adley went 5/6 with HRs from both sides of the plate in bowie's DH

AND the dbacks might actually win a game today. TANK BABY TANK

, Sunday, 30 May 2021 22:27 (one year ago) link

I get that baseball card reference.

Thank you I was hoping someone would

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 31 May 2021 00:59 (one year ago) link

I actually have the very much less valuable but still worth a few bucks hasty replacement card, before the properly revised, more common one came out.


Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 2 June 2021 16:51 (one year ago) link

Orioles June is gonna be lit

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 2 June 2021 16:51 (one year ago) link

3 in a row lol

, Saturday, 5 June 2021 02:20 (one year ago) link

break 'em up.

j.q higgins, Saturday, 5 June 2021 11:13 (one year ago) link

Loving the aggressive baserunning here.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 6 June 2021 18:57 (one year ago) link


Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 6 June 2021 20:19 (one year ago) link

mountcastle and santander getting hot make the team a little more tolerable to watch...cedric mullins is a joy, though.

j.q higgins, Monday, 7 June 2021 11:57 (one year ago) link

Nice of the O’s to return the favor tonight. Satisfying.

Michael F Gill, Thursday, 10 June 2021 01:56 (one year ago) link

congrats on beating matt harvey

, Thursday, 10 June 2021 03:56 (one year ago) link

rodriguez is only 21 but he's fanning like 15 per nine innings now in double-a. can he possibly be worse than the shit they regularly roll out? do we not want to see the best available players playing in the majors?

also sucks for cedric that he's not even eligible for arbitration until after *next* year -- he'll probably get a $10K raise to $600K after putting up 5 WAR this season. (and if he were eligible for arbitration *this* winter you know goddamn well he'd have been traded at the deadline)

mookieproof, Tuesday, 17 August 2021 03:16 (ten months ago) link

anyway sorry -- the o's are just the most egregious current example of how fucked up the entire system is. the pirates/marlins/etc are little better if perhaps less blatant.

i really hope it all burns down this winter!

mookieproof, Tuesday, 17 August 2021 03:21 (ten months ago) link

Seriously, fuck this

Guayaquil (eephus!), Thursday, 19 August 2021 20:44 (ten months ago) link

Why Not? '22

, Thursday, 19 August 2021 22:58 (ten months ago) link

two homers off ohtani in the first!!!1!

mookieproof, Wednesday, 25 August 2021 23:25 (ten months ago) link

won a game

, Thursday, 26 August 2021 02:34 (ten months ago) link

what a moment

mookieproof, Thursday, 26 August 2021 03:09 (ten months ago) link

break em up

mookieproof, Thursday, 26 August 2021 23:27 (ten months ago) link

love this team again now

Guayaquil (eephus!), Thursday, 26 August 2021 23:39 (ten months ago) link

as cedric mullins goes, so go the orioles...but keegan akin w/ the out of the blue gem. what? 71 gamescore!

j.q higgins, Friday, 27 August 2021 14:31 (ten months ago) link

lol wasn’t he like 0-9 with an 8 ERA or something

Tracer Hand, Friday, 27 August 2021 15:50 (ten months ago) link

Keegan Akin's last three starts: 17 IP, 5ER, 10H, 8BB, 14K, lift your head and breathe the fresh replacement-level air

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 1 September 2021 02:35 (ten months ago) link


mookieproof, Wednesday, 1 September 2021 02:45 (ten months ago) link

with two w's for Keegans two wins (so far!)

Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 3 September 2021 02:43 (ten months ago) link

...and a happy john means to all who celebrate

j.q higgins, Saturday, 4 September 2021 00:18 (ten months ago) link

big series win in da bronx

mookieproof, Sunday, 5 September 2021 21:31 (nine months ago) link

Keegan Akin Can't Lose

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 5 September 2021 22:34 (nine months ago) link

akin to be

j.q higgins, Monday, 6 September 2021 15:55 (nine months ago) link

you gotta hand it to hanser alberto

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 6 September 2021 18:31 (nine months ago) link

but then hanser is compelled to hand it back to cedric mullins

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 6 September 2021 18:43 (nine months ago) link

"zac lowther with a great outing lowers his season ERA to 6.91" is a thing Orioles fans say

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 6 September 2021 19:08 (nine months ago) link

Manny Barreda gets his moment

Guayaquil (eephus!), Thursday, 9 September 2021 04:52 (nine months ago) link

what a day

, Sunday, 12 September 2021 02:40 (nine months ago) link

what a day

, Sunday, 12 September 2021 20:47 (nine months ago) link

"zac lowther with a rough outing sees his season ERA tick back up to 9.92" is a thing Orioles fans say

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 12 September 2021 20:52 (nine months ago) link

Ugh. A game we should have won. Bullpen troubles.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Wednesday, 22 September 2021 02:54 (nine months ago) link

seems crazy that cedric mullins is the first o ever to have a 30-30 season. maybe don baylor got closest?

j.q higgins, Saturday, 25 September 2021 00:34 (nine months ago) link

It was pitching defense and the 3 run homer not pitching defense and the 30 stolen bases

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 00:40 (nine months ago) link

fucking fleas.

j.q higgins, Saturday, 25 September 2021 00:44 (nine months ago) link

In a fitting homage to classic Orioles baseball Mullins did indeed reach 30-30 with a 3-run homer

Guayaquil (eephus!), Saturday, 25 September 2021 00:56 (nine months ago) link

maybe don baylor got closest?

Thanks to Play Index I can tell you that the closest is Reggie Jackson in 1976, 27 HR and 28 SB. Baylor is the only other guy to get to 25/25. We are not counting Ken Williams, a 30-30 man for the 1922 St. Louis Browns.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Saturday, 25 September 2021 00:59 (nine months ago) link

most steals he ever had in a season...crazy how many bases that team stole for a weaver team. can't imagine ever sending belanger for how infrequently he got on base.

j.q higgins, Saturday, 25 September 2021 01:03 (nine months ago) link

Thinking next year's thread title should be something along the lines of "Mullin it over: J.Q. and Eephus discuss whether or not the 2022 Orioles will be any good"

Michael F Gill, Saturday, 25 September 2021 02:13 (nine months ago) link

Like I don't even exist

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 03:48 (nine months ago) link


mookieproof, Saturday, 25 September 2021 04:01 (nine months ago) link

This is important context: The first time that a Baltimore season ticket holder renews for next season, that person will have committed more dollars to the 2022 Orioles than the club will have in payroll obligations. https://t.co/CvSX9kis1i

— Buster Olney (@Buster_ESPN) September 24, 2021

mookieproof, Saturday, 25 September 2021 04:25 (nine months ago) link

if only chris davis didn't retire

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 04:54 (nine months ago) link

The quote tweets on that tweet are kind of insane. I'm an Orioles fan, and I will stay an Orioles fan through it all, but I cannot grasp the level of stannage required to spend your day bashing Buster Olney for stating the obvious fact that the Orioles are not trying to put a major league baseball team on the field. Like, it's a rebuild, I get it, but how can you be so in the tank that you insist THIS is the exact rebuild you want? Have these people not noticed that the 2017-21 Astros are not the only good team in the league, and all the other good teams didn't tank like this?

Guayaquil (eephus!), Saturday, 25 September 2021 19:17 (nine months ago) link

this isn't the exact rebuild i want... that one would involve us having a presence in latin america before like yesterday... but i'm extremely happy with how it's going

i latched onto orioles baseball in 2005 and had to wait 7 years for a winning team, after 7 consecutive years of never fully committing to a rebuild. imagine if i'd latched on in 1998. i never wanna go back there again. can't handle it. absolutely give me one more #1 draft pick before we start to improve. and i think we will improve next year, faster than people think. i don't doubt that the team will spend money again like they did 5 years ago. part of me wants them to sign one of the big shortstops, like the padres signing machado before they were good, but i can understand the windows not really aligning. maybe it isn't worth it to sign carlos correa and potentially waste his age 28 and 29 seasons.

one thing i do wish we were doing is spending money to tank better. i think that's really all a salary floor will do. take costlier chances on players that can be spun at the deadline. take a chance on trying to fix a robbie ray instead of a matt harvey. take on bad contracts from other teams in exchange for their prospects. but no one really does that.

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 19:30 (nine months ago) link

and barring us obtaining the smartest FO on the planet (TB), i don't think it's actually possible to compete in the AL East without tanking. not without preexisting latin american talent or a lot of money. congrats to the giants for overcoming the dodgers without tanking but can you really count on that happening reliably? they still had four consecutive seasons losing seasons before this one and might go right back to it next year.

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 19:41 (nine months ago) link

not to mention we don't have the rockies or dbacks or second half padres to rip apart. us vs the world babey. adley will take us there

, Saturday, 25 September 2021 19:43 (nine months ago) link

i don't think it's actually possible to compete in the AL East without tanking. not without preexisting latin american talent or a lot of money.

What would you say the Rays are doing?

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 26 September 2021 00:52 (nine months ago) link

By the way I am an optimist too. I think the core of a good team DOES exist in the system now, if management is willing to spend around it. But I think we would have been in the same place with the rebuild if we'd been losing 90 games a year instead of 110 games a year, and it would have been less embarrassing. There is one guy, Rutschman, we truly got as a direct result of the ultra-tank, and that took one year of being horrible. Is the core of the next good team Heston Kjerstad and Colton Cowser? Or the guys we got in trade for our entire major league roster like Dillon Tate and Yusniel Diaz and Dean Kremer. Seems more like besides Rutschman it's John Means, Ryan Mountcastle, Cedric Mullins, Austin Hays, Grayson Rodriguez (drafted after 2017 when we were bad but not on purpose), maybe Keegan Akin if the second-half form is real... all guys we'd have even if we hadn't been running so much Pat Valaika and Richie Martin out there day after day after day.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 26 September 2021 01:02 (nine months ago) link

What would you say the Rays are doing?

that was the first thing i said. they're the smartest FO in baseball. i'd like to have them as an FO, but that's not possible right now. "preexisting latin american talent" also applies to them.

but also.... even though they didn't outright tank, they had 4 sub-.500 years in a row not that long ago. i get annoyed with the "they've figured out how to compete every year" meme. also while we're on the subject of embarrassment, i'd be embarrassed if the orioles traded away every great hypothetical player they develop before they hit arb2! i would hate that.

i also think you're not being fair to kjerstad, who might be great, or cowser, who has been fantastic so far. not to mention coby mayo, who is absolutely hitting top 100 lists next year and was only signed because of that fat #2 slot money saved on kjerstad. don't care about the manny trade busts, they were made by a miserable lame duck GM who was already pretty bad at trades. elias somehow got much better returns for dylan bundy and jose iglesias. i'm counting those.

, Sunday, 26 September 2021 01:47 (nine months ago) link

I would not be in the slightest perturbed if the Orioles had 4 sub-.500 years in a row (I've been a fan since the '80s, how could I be?) What's on the field right now is clearly something different than that!

Kjerstad and Cowser of course could be great! Any top-5 pick COULD be. Most aren't. If I believed Elias was uniquely good at turning high picks into valuable major league players, it might be a different story. Then again, if the Orioles had put a better team on the field, maybe we would have picked 7th in 2020 instead of 2nd and you know what? By all accounts Kjerstad would still have been available!

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 26 September 2021 01:58 (nine months ago) link

But the slot money wouldn't have been there to get Mayo and Baumler... I know everyone hates the underslot strategy but it really makes a lot of sense given the deranged slot value differences at the top of the first round. Pick 2 grants you way more cash to spend than pick 7 even if you don't spend it all on pick 2.

, Sunday, 26 September 2021 02:05 (nine months ago) link

what if you don’t actually want to be granted more cash to spend

mookieproof, Sunday, 26 September 2021 12:06 (nine months ago) link

so now you're shaming the orioles for NOT spending money.......smh......

, Sunday, 26 September 2021 16:54 (nine months ago) link

man we sacrifice the #1 pick for the good of humanity and the nats can't even finish the job i hate them

, Sunday, 3 October 2021 00:01 (nine months ago) link

good news -- the orioles will not surpass the 1916 philadelphia athletics -- who finished 40 games behind the 76-77 washington senators -- for (what may be??) the biggest gap between last and next-to-last teams

it's not really the same, of course, and the 464-run difference in run differential may be another story

mookieproof, Sunday, 3 October 2021 01:02 (nine months ago) link

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