Willie McGee is part of the 2018 St Louis Cardinals

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is it kind of weird that i'm most excited about the new coaching staff? willie fucking mcgee is part of this team now. jose oquendo is back. chris carpenter is back and ready to yell fuck. ozzie smith is finally beginning to get over tony larussa. mike maddux is the new pitching coach, replacing the guy who stares blankly while mike matheny calls on matt bowman for his 114th high leverage appearance of the season.

lynn is gone, mikolas replaces him and no one has any idea how good he'll be. projections are fairly high on a guy who hasn't ever had success in MLB and has been pitching overseas since 2015. alex reyes is In The Best Shape Of His Life and his replacement arm from Dr Andrews should arrive in the mail around early May. he might end up replacing wainwright, whose best case scenario is making a heroic relief pitching appearance in the playoffs and then retiring. carlos martinez continues to be the best thing about the team.

jose martinez is fun too, and if matt carpenter's back continues to flare up (it's happening already in spring training) he may end up getting a lot of playing time at 1B (please no luke voit, please). i haven't watched ozuna play that much. i hope that i like him. i have reasonable expectations for him, but i'm cautiously optimistic that he can put up at least one great (>4 WAR) season during his stint here. tommy pham is no fluke, and i'm looking forward to seeing what he can do in a full season. i'm also terrified that he'll get injured, like he has been almost every year except for 2017.

pre-season predictions are kind of silly because a team's final record depends so much on whether the front office decides to go for it or fold at mid-season. but i think they're capable of putting up 95 wins. if things go bad, they could be around 80 wins. i'd guess they end up around 87 or 88, hopefully enough to barely slide into the wild card.

i remember the corned beef of my childhood (Karl Malone), Thursday, 22 February 2018 23:11 (two years ago) link

best thread title

mookieproof, Thursday, 22 February 2018 23:58 (two years ago) link

Was thinking something like “How ‘zuna is now?”

Outfield is better.
Infield is same.
Starters I’d bet shakes out even.
Bullpen is worse.

Treading water unless Reyes magically comes back at 100%.

bnw, Friday, 23 February 2018 03:59 (two years ago) link

i know cubs are the faves but i can see another tight season between the cubs/brewers/cardinals, like last year

na (NA), Friday, 23 February 2018 15:48 (two years ago) link

does Willie still look like E.T.? (popular observation by Howard Cosell during '82 WS)

ice cream social justice (Dr Morbius), Friday, 23 February 2018 16:10 (two years ago) link


he's hanging in there! just heard a story on a broadcast that he was only tossed out of one game in his pro career, and that was in the minor leagues (after throwing a helmet in frustration) and he vowed to never let it happen again.

i know cubs are the faves but i can see another tight season between the cubs/brewers/cardinals, like last year
it's definitely possible, but i'd guess the cubs will only get tangled up in that if they have another slightly underwhelming year (obv they were good last year, just not as good as most people thought they'd be). i'd be pretty happy if the cardinals can split the season series with the cubs this year. but the brewers seem like the more imminent threat to the cardinals chances to snag a WC spot.

Outfield is better.
Infield is same.
Starters I’d bet shakes out even.
Bullpen is worse.

Treading water unless Reyes magically comes back at 100%.

i pretty much agree with all of that, except i think the bullpen might actually be better. i kind of agree with the strategy of countering the volatility of relief pitchers by building a deep bullpen with many options (https://www.vivaelbirdos.com/2017/10/25/16524650/the-cardinals-should-build-a-bullpen-through-quantity-not-quality). last year's group seemed kind of top heavy, and when those options disappointed (oh all season, and cecil in the first half) the team was just kind of fucked (until rosenthal stepped it up, RIP). but i feel pretty good about starting off with gregerson, lyons, cecil, leone, and then supplementing with the surplus of guys on the cusp as the season progresses (reyes, as he eases back into playing time, guys like helsley, hicks, etc).

i don't know. all of that depth is countered by the matheny factor, which will hopefully be at least somewhat countered by the maddux factor.

i remember the corned beef of my childhood (Karl Malone), Friday, 23 February 2018 19:38 (two years ago) link


the determination you've come to expect from the 2018 willie mcgees.

it would be bad if he made the team, performance-wise, but i root for him all the same.

i remember the corned beef of my childhood (Karl Malone), Monday, 26 February 2018 23:36 (two years ago) link

breaking: bernard gilkey is also on the coaching staff, at least in spring training

i remember the corned beef of my childhood (Karl Malone), Friday, 2 March 2018 18:41 (two years ago) link

now all they need is mark whiten

mookieproof, Friday, 2 March 2018 20:33 (two years ago) link

i think i might like rick ankiel more than ricky horton, as a broadcaster? he's just doing guest color commentary on this game (and one earlier this week), and i'm not sure he's been considered as anything full-time. but he's pretty good at it already, for a beginner, and i imagine he would just get better. he has a natural grasp for the cadence of color commentary - when to shut up, when to talk. just the sound of his voice is good for tv. he has a sort of interesting twang that's hard to nail down but easy to listen to. he says interesting things and his little jokes are actually kinda funny, usually.

he just fucked up now, a little, by starting to discuss a strikeout sequence just as they were headed to break. but even then, he caught it and stopped himself short with a "...he's just dominatin' "

this kid has skills.

also he seems to be more knowledgeable about the game than horton (and by extension, hrabosky, who is kind of turning into a joke). example: just about a week ago ricky horton seemed to think he was really bold in saying that the astros "have a chance" of being good for the next few years. uuuh yeah, usually young teams that win 100 games and still have a top 10 farm system are predicted to be pretty good for a while. anyway, but just now they were talking about kyle tucker and ankiel kind of offhandedly mentioned that tucker would be starting for some teams, but the astros have excellent depth so he'll have time to develop. nothing groundbreaking, but a basic bit of understanding about the other team that the other announcers rarely seem bothered to mention, if they're even aware.

and in my opinionation, the sun is gonna surely shine♪♫ (Karl Malone), Saturday, 10 March 2018 00:53 (two years ago) link

also - he has an ohtani-like advantage because he was an amazing pitcher AND a MLB-worthy hitter and genuine threat for a couple years, with that really unique, swing for the fences final season when he struck out 44% of the time but with an .ISO of .234. there aren't too many people who have a view on the game like him.

and in my opinionation, the sun is gonna surely shine♪♫ (Karl Malone), Saturday, 10 March 2018 00:59 (two years ago) link

Lance Lynn is dad. Miles Mikolas is stepdad.

Karl Malone, Monday, 12 March 2018 17:21 (two years ago) link

yadi went 4/4 with 2 HRs and a double today, and the double bounced off the very top of the outfield wall. he also picked a guy off first.

Karl Malone, Friday, 16 March 2018 19:26 (two years ago) link

jordan hicks made the roster(!)

he has not pitched above high A

mookieproof, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 21:43 (two years ago) link

He’s good! My guess is that as soon as wainwright or gregorson some back from the DL he’ll be first back down

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 28 March 2018 02:31 (two years ago) link

early season fun: matt carpenter probably has no business playing 3B (bad arm) or 2B (horrible range), but he'll keep doing it because jose martinez is the best hitter on the team right now and 1B is pretty much the only place he can play (he can technically play corner OF but it's pretty ugly).

also apparently ozuna's right arm has been bothering him since last fall and throughout spring training, and already yesterday there was an Outfielder who can't throw Situation where a ball hit to Ozuna in LF in a sac fly situation was awkwardly handled by Tommy Pham in CF, presumably because Ozuna couldn't throw home with authority.

Karl Malone, Sunday, 1 April 2018 17:33 (one year ago) link

How hot is Dominique Leone in person?

mookieproof, Wednesday, 4 April 2018 03:04 (one year ago) link

That was a wild game. I’m happy and sad to have seen it in person! First game that started and ended with back to back HRs (and on consecutive pitches each time too.)(and the CF and RF hit them for each team?)

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 4 April 2018 04:02 (one year ago) link

btw https://www.si.com/mlb/2018/04/02/tommy-pham-st-louis-cardinals

mookieproof, Wednesday, 4 April 2018 14:11 (one year ago) link

Call hurts #STLCards
Ball 1 should be strike 2
Top 2 Wacha vs Marte
0% call same
11.4in from edge pic.twitter.com/MbQ8i8f9uW

— Cards Strike Zone (@CardinalsUmp) April 7, 2018

Karl Malone, Sunday, 8 April 2018 07:56 (one year ago) link


— VanHickslestein (@VanHicklestein) April 7, 2018

Karl Malone, Sunday, 8 April 2018 07:56 (one year ago) link

Combination of terrible framing by the catcher and the pitcher completely missing his target, but yeah...

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Sunday, 8 April 2018 12:36 (one year ago) link


Karl Malone, Tuesday, 10 April 2018 17:44 (one year ago) link


I may have said this before but: I was an eleven-year-old St. Louisan in 1982. Literally the ONLY sports allegiance I have is to the Cardinals of that era (McGee, Ozzie/Lonnie, Hernandez, Whitey, Sutter, heck, even Andujar). Makes me so happy to see that any of those names are still relevant.

like hell, but with more ketchup (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 10 April 2018 17:58 (one year ago) link

let's give it up for tommy herr too, he doesn't get remembered enough. the 1987 team is the literally the first one i remember (i was 4 then, and i just knew ozzie), but my grandpa had an ozzie smith defense instructional VHS that i used to constantly watch, and part of the tape (the best part) was a highlight reel of all his greatest plays and somehow i absorbed the key players of 1982 through that.

Karl Malone, Tuesday, 10 April 2018 18:05 (one year ago) link

tidbits i had to tune it to the cubs' broadcast to learn (i cannot tolerate jim edmonds in the booth any longer):

jose martinez' dad was carlos martinez, former MLB player. i knew that, but didn't realize that

1) carlos martinez was the poorly performing white sox first basemen when Frank Thomas rolled into town
2) the following year ('91), carlos martinez ended up as the backup to jim thome in cleveland
and most importantly, 3) carlos martinez was the guy who hit the home run that bounced off of jose canseco's head

Karl Malone, Thursday, 19 April 2018 19:35 (one year ago) link

tyler o'neill: good socks

mookieproof, Thursday, 19 April 2018 19:51 (one year ago) link

son of a famous body builder, too!
and he's canadian! (speaking of which, this is kind of nowhere but what happened to brett lawrie? last played in 2016, played above replacement level, still only 28?)

Karl Malone, Thursday, 19 April 2018 19:57 (one year ago) link

head case: https://jaysjournal.com/2018/02/22/blue-jays-sad-story-brett-lawrie

mookieproof, Thursday, 19 April 2018 20:23 (one year ago) link

oh. jeez, i had no idea. he seems very lost.

Karl Malone, Thursday, 19 April 2018 22:00 (one year ago) link

Mets are done with the Cards this year, can't say I'm sad.

Tommy Pham has 9 career WAR in less than two complete seasons of playing time. Where the hell do the Cardinals find these guys?

Jay Jaffe:
The Cardinals have a great organization, but it also took them until he was 29 to give him 200 PA in a season.

the ignatius rock of ignorance (Dr Morbius), Friday, 27 April 2018 16:05 (one year ago) link

that's true, but he was also injured all the goddamn time as he was working his way through the minors. he missed almost all of the 2011 and 2012 to injuries, played poorly in AAA in 2013, and then suffered through a string of more minor injuries in 2014-2016. he played well in a bench role in 2015, but then in 2016 he was barely above average (albeit dealing with injuries again). 2017 was a breakout year for him, but it was also a rare season where he was healthy most of the time.

Karl Malone, Friday, 27 April 2018 16:16 (one year ago) link

He should stop stabbing himself in the face tbqh.

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Friday, 27 April 2018 16:38 (one year ago) link

i love that he invented some sort of elastic-band-based custom training tool that is also capable of making his head bleed

Karl Malone, Friday, 27 April 2018 16:39 (one year ago) link

Where the hell do the Cardinals find these guys?

the real Cardinals Devil Magic story is Jose Martinez, i think. my co-favorite player (with carlos).

Karl Malone, Friday, 27 April 2018 16:41 (one year ago) link

saw rany j being very salty about how the royals just sold him to the cardinals two years ago, didn't even get a player in return

can't seem to find out how much money they got, probably because it would be insulting as hell

mookieproof, Friday, 27 April 2018 18:16 (one year ago) link

i don't really blame matheny for doing it -- it worked! -- but i also don't want to see him use four damn pitchers in a single inning

mookieproof, Saturday, 28 April 2018 02:23 (one year ago) link

greg holland - A Proven Closer

Karl Malone, Saturday, 28 April 2018 02:48 (one year ago) link

we are the goon squad and we're coming to town
beep beep


beep beep

Karl Malone, Saturday, 28 April 2018 20:19 (one year ago) link

dan mclaughlin has been talking about Kingham's perfect game chances since the 4th inning

Karl Malone, Sunday, 29 April 2018 18:54 (one year ago) link

Jose Martinez compared Carlos Martinez’s slow home run trot around the bases to Yoenis Cespedes, a comparison that’s strikingly accurate.

According to Statcast, it takes Cespedes 27.4 seconds, on average, to circle the bases.

Carlos took 27.9 seconds.

— Joe Trezza (@JoeTrezz) May 2, 2018

mookieproof, Wednesday, 2 May 2018 21:44 (one year ago) link

mike matheny just used carlos martinez as a pinch hitter in the 6th inning. jedd gyorko is still on the bench.

obviously DLC (Karl Malone), Saturday, 5 May 2018 20:25 (one year ago) link

well, yadi's balls exploded, he's out for 4+ weeks. i've always wondered how carson kelly would do with playing time, guess we're about to find out.

obviously DLC (Karl Malone), Sunday, 6 May 2018 15:24 (one year ago) link

damn, the gif of that is hard to watch and hard to stop watching. his junk ripples

WilliamC, Sunday, 6 May 2018 15:36 (one year ago) link

doesn't help that it was a foul tip off of a ~100 mph jordan hicks fastball

obviously DLC (Karl Malone), Sunday, 6 May 2018 15:46 (one year ago) link

doesn't help that he wasn't wearing a cup either, lolwtf

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Sunday, 6 May 2018 15:52 (one year ago) link

that's what i thought, too! has it been confirmed? i mean, it looks like he wasn't. but...shit, i wore a cup when i played catcher in my 10-12 year old league and no one could throw over 70 mph

obviously DLC (Karl Malone), Sunday, 6 May 2018 15:58 (one year ago) link

mgr of the year!

a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 14 August 2018 12:10 (one year ago) link


posting this here again because it's still making me lol this morning

Karl Malone, Tuesday, 14 August 2018 17:45 (one year ago) link

seven-game winning streak, only 4 games back

na (NA), Wednesday, 15 August 2018 21:26 (one year ago) link

though five of those seven were against the marlins and the royals

na (NA), Wednesday, 15 August 2018 21:26 (one year ago) link

Yeah, story of the last few years - beating up on bad teams, mediocre against the good ones. Still, if they were going to bust into a 7-game winning streak, now is the time to do it! A big part of the streak has been carpenter and the bullpen (who have gone from closing game after game to being unstoppable since the all-star break).

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 15 August 2018 21:39 (one year ago) link

this is about as wild as the cardinals get

After being hit, the trainers wanted to see if @MattCarp13's hand was ok. He tested his strength by trying to open a jar of salsa. He opened it!

"If I can open it, I can play!" - Matt Carpenter #ItsGottaBeTheSalsa 🔥 pic.twitter.com/fx3wgmdxum

— St. Louis Cardinals (@Cardinals) August 16, 2018

Karl Malone, Thursday, 16 August 2018 04:57 (one year ago) link

cautiously optimistic

Karl Malone, Thursday, 23 August 2018 05:13 (one year ago) link

optimistically optimistic

Karl Malone, Saturday, 25 August 2018 01:16 (one year ago) link

i knew things would be better after matheny, but jesus

Karl Malone, Saturday, 25 August 2018 01:16 (one year ago) link

, but jesus

unintentional irony there

Karl Malone, Saturday, 25 August 2018 04:14 (one year ago) link

shildt, man

The #Stlcards will announce that Mike Shildt is now their manager, stripping away the interim title

— Bob Nightengale (@BNightengale) August 28, 2018

Karl Malone, Tuesday, 28 August 2018 19:36 (one year ago) link

mookieproof, Tuesday, 28 August 2018 19:39 (one year ago) link

shildt likes to keep his eyes in the shade and i respect that


Karl Malone, Tuesday, 28 August 2018 19:40 (one year ago) link

there aren't too many big-league managers who never played in at least the minors (although schildt did play college ball). last one i can remember for sure is dave trembley, but there might have been others since

mookieproof, Tuesday, 28 August 2018 19:51 (one year ago) link

the two true outcomes player

John Gant is the only player in Major League history to hit 2 HR and never reach base safely in any other way. #STLCards

— Joe Trezza (@JoeTrezz) August 31, 2018

Karl Malone, Friday, 31 August 2018 16:37 (one year ago) link

greg holland's revenge

mookieproof, Monday, 3 September 2018 23:11 (one year ago) link

it was a stupid game. baseball is a stupid game

Karl Malone, Monday, 3 September 2018 23:14 (one year ago) link

part of me thinks carpenter embraces this hashtag because it could eventually lead to a lucrative new salsa company

well, that didn't take long

Hey @MattCarp13! We get it! Bueno Mojo Salsa available 9/13 at our St. Louis stores. #ItsGottaBeTheSalsa #SchnucksMojo #Schnucks @Cardinals 🍅🌶🔥🛒 pic.twitter.com/BwXAohu9lT

— Schnucks (@SchnuckMarkets) September 10, 2018

Karl Malone, Monday, 10 September 2018 16:57 (one year ago) link

4 losses in a row = drop out of WC2 slot

a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 15 September 2018 23:44 (one year ago) link

the rest of the season features 7 more games against the dodgers, cubs, and brewers, so for better or worse they'll have a decent opportunity to earn it.

news broke earlier today that they offered flaherty and another player for donaldson, last off-season. glad that didn't work out!

Karl Malone, Saturday, 15 September 2018 23:50 (one year ago) link

i hope i eat my words later tonight, but my stomach is already in a knot about this wainwright situation. he's starting tonight in a crucial game against the dodgers, still in the rotation, after an awful comeback start last week. watching that game was excruciating.

it started with an inning of the best velocity and movement i've seen from him since early 2017, which of course got me really excited about the possibility that his rehab actually worked and he was going to be useful down the stretch. a wonderful capstone to a great career. this was quickly followed by a nightmarish beatdown that should have been much worse, coupled with a 6-mph drop in velocity on his fastball, hanging many curves in the middle of the zone, and an ill-advised decision to send him back out for one more inning, which featured the same worrisome velocity and hanging curves. but no one scored in that last inning, somehow, and then the offense saved the day so that he didn't get the all-important Loss. immediately afterward they announced he would remain in the rotation. a very matheny-esque decision imo. it could get ugly out there.

Karl Malone, Sunday, 16 September 2018 16:11 (one year ago) link

especially frustrating because he could be legitimately useful in the bullpen right now.

Karl Malone, Sunday, 16 September 2018 16:13 (one year ago) link

Game score 75!

timellison, Monday, 17 September 2018 04:14 (one year ago) link

i am a genius

Karl Malone, Monday, 17 September 2018 04:22 (one year ago) link

*eats words*

that was ~vintage wainwright~, it really was. if nothing else i'm really happy i was able to sit down and see it tonight, even if i'm not sure it'll ever happen again

Karl Malone, Monday, 17 September 2018 04:23 (one year ago) link

Gomber has missed several possible called strikes tonight because he and Molina are not entirely on the same page and YM has to lunge around a bit.

WmC, Wednesday, 19 September 2018 00:33 (one year ago) link

yeah, on the Sunday Night Baseball game the announcers were raving about his pitchframing abilities, but to my eye they haven't been particularly outstanding of late (not sure what the metrics are (or how reliable said metrics are))

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 19 September 2018 01:25 (one year ago) link

if y'all can sweep the Cubs I will proudly wear a "best fans in baseball" t-shirt

frogbs, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:25 (one year ago) link

it's remarkable how much more i like the cardinals when they're not managed by TLR or matheny. and even more so if they don't bring bud norris back next year

mookieproof, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:32 (one year ago) link

i'd like 'em more without Molina but that's probably just sour grapes because he has an OPS of like 2.500 against Milwaukee

frogbs, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:32 (one year ago) link

fact check: false

molina has hit .263/.324/.409 against milwaukee, and in fact has a higher OPS against all the other NL central teams

but yeah, i don't like him either

mookieproof, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:38 (one year ago) link

oh then I was just talking about the games I watch

can you check that

frogbs, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:41 (one year ago) link

(actually he has hit pretty well at miller park)

mookieproof, Friday, 28 September 2018 18:46 (one year ago) link

Let me check my files...

Looks like his OPS is 1.836 when I truly, truly believe in him as I cheer him on

Karl Malone, Friday, 28 September 2018 21:22 (one year ago) link

RIP cardinals, btw. I just saw the score of today’s game with the cubs.

Karl Malone, Friday, 28 September 2018 21:43 (one year ago) link

how about this miles mikolas kid

cinderella story out of japan, throws 200 innings, goes 18-4 . . . and all without striking out a single batter

mookieproof, Saturday, 29 September 2018 20:08 (one year ago) link

viva el clemente bridge

mookieproof, Thursday, 4 October 2018 01:37 (one year ago) link

according to some admittedly dubious math and a lot of assumptions, the guy who threw the baseball back after stanton's HR throws harder than marcell ozuna


Karl Malone, Saturday, 6 October 2018 16:33 (one year ago) link

Oquendo will remain in the organization, working out of Jupiter. https://t.co/Op4JYzxbr8

— Jenifer Langosch (@LangoschMLB) October 16, 2018


1-800-CALL-ATT (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 16 October 2018 16:58 (one year ago) link

Yadier Molina has been named the recipient of the prestigious 2018 Roberto Clemente Award in recognition of his exemplary humanitarian efforts, including relief work in Puerto Rico following Hurricane Maria in 2017. #STLCards pic.twitter.com/vOo6SWUxBT

— St. Louis Cardinals (@Cardinals) October 24, 2018

Karl Malone, Wednesday, 24 October 2018 19:12 (one year ago) link

good, bcz the Mets' nominee was Jose Reyes

a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 24 October 2018 21:36 (one year ago) link

willie turned 60 on friday and i am ashamed to have forgotten until now

mookieproof, Monday, 5 November 2018 20:10 (one year ago) link

one year passes...

Karl Malone has to get a Joe Posnanski subscription so he can read this and have several meltdowns.


clemenza, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 20:17 (four months ago) link


i am very curious!i do think matheny might have been an excellent 20th century baseball manager

at home in the alternate future, (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 20:20 (four months ago) link

When Posnanski moved to The Athletic, I remember him saying he didn't mind if subscribers occasionally re-posted something, so here's the Matheny piece on a Google Doc:


clemenza, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 23:50 (four months ago) link

Just read it...Good bookend to Hinch/Cole.

clemenza, Wednesday, 6 November 2019 05:12 (four months ago) link

Thanks for posting that. I can see matheny sticking around KC for a while, but he seems to be particularly ill-suited to an up and coming team of prospects. In STL he was known for favoring poor-performing veterans for years at a time while providing inconsistent playing time to the prospects underneath. Maybe that won’t be such an issue in KC.

at home in the alternate future, (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 6 November 2019 15:02 (four months ago) link

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