i'm committed to you but i'm not getting enough sex and i want to open it up
this is 100% a reasonable discussion to have in a gay relationship imo and if he draws a line in the sand on that then you might have to move onto conversation b
― J0rdan S., Friday, 26 December 2014 18:41 (nine years ago) link
j0rdan otm, that is some serious #realtalk and obviously your situation is prob complex and multi-faceted but at the end of the day, I think j0rdan's reduction is still otm: that IS a 100% reasonable discussion to have and it is a p crucial aspect of a relationship, especially if there as imbalance of desires.
― y kant max read (Stevie D(eux)), Friday, 26 December 2014 20:31 (nine years ago) link
i think that in a healthy relationship you should at least be able to talk about the notion of opening it up, if one person wants to
if one side explodes at the mere notion that's a problem imo, unless the other person is totally on the same wavelength
― J0rdan S., Friday, 26 December 2014 20:58 (nine years ago) link
There isn't a single relationship I've endured in which the other guy hasn't balked at the idea. I think I'm Dracula or something.
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 26 December 2014 22:54 (nine years ago) link
balking at the idea is a fair reaction, i guess, but one must accept that they're giving the person who wants to open it up a reason to leave the relationship
― J0rdan S., Friday, 26 December 2014 22:56 (nine years ago) link
good luck matt
j0rdan, if u and the bf are home do you want to go to the Bathsalts drag show at Don Pedro's on Mon night?
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Friday, 26 December 2014 23:03 (nine years ago) link
i'll ask him!
― J0rdan S., Friday, 26 December 2014 23:06 (nine years ago) link
it's what all the young(ish) bklyn queers are doing apparently
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Friday, 26 December 2014 23:07 (nine years ago) link
obv not an expert on the gay aspect of relationships and def not an expert on the non-monogamy discussion but matt are you in love with this guy or do you just love him bc you've known him so long and you're somewhat comfortable? do you really want to be in the relationship bc of him or just bc it's hard thinking about life outside of it? you mentioned the sex thing but you also mentioned other incompatabilities - knowing when to end a relationship or when to just put extra work in is really fuckin hard, but i hope you can figure this stuff out and be happier bc you seem like an awesome guy who deserves a great relationship.
― just1n3, Friday, 26 December 2014 23:08 (nine years ago) link
(also sorry for creeping on the gay thread, but it's not like any straights are posting interesting sex stuff on the regular tmi thread)
― just1n3, Friday, 26 December 2014 23:09 (nine years ago) link
NO HETEROS ALLOWED IN THE ROOM!!
― y kant max read (Stevie D(eux)), Saturday, 27 December 2014 00:47 (nine years ago) link
j/k we <3 just1n3 and that is also v sage, v otm advice
If you're into the guy you're with and see a distant future with him, you're surely gonna be going through a lot worse shit than a "baby I want more ass than you can give me" conversation. I wouldn't hesitate or even make it a big thing.
― fgti, Saturday, 27 December 2014 06:40 (nine years ago) link
i would say "suggest a threesome" but it kinda sounds like boo is sort of lame at sex and that's part of the problem?
― (曇り) (clouds), Saturday, 27 December 2014 06:52 (nine years ago) link
hehe a little bit. i had conversation b and i think we're both pretty relieved though it's hard and there's a lot of emotion. we've sort of been moving towards friendship anyway. we both still care about each other a lot.
thank you guys, j0rdan and justine and etc., for the feedback. it helped me stick with the right way to go.
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Saturday, 27 December 2014 19:48 (nine years ago) link
i don't think he's lame at sex, but other incompatibilities and the resulting resentments have really affected his ability to have it.
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Saturday, 27 December 2014 19:53 (nine years ago) link
did he lose a coughdrop in his...?
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Saturday, 27 December 2014 19:56 (nine years ago) link
yes
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Saturday, 27 December 2014 20:17 (nine years ago) link
good for you! ime it's hard enough leaving an abusive relationship with someone you hate, let alone letting go of someone you actually still care a great deal about, and who is a good person.
― just1n3, Saturday, 27 December 2014 21:49 (nine years ago) link
how does one respond when a dude you've previously hooked up with asks "what are you into?"
― (曇り) (clouds), Monday, 29 December 2014 18:50 (nine years ago) link
'remembering things'
― donna rouge, Monday, 29 December 2014 18:55 (nine years ago) link
ugh xp lol
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Monday, 29 December 2014 18:56 (nine years ago) link
i hate the question regardless
― (曇り) (clouds), Monday, 29 December 2014 19:03 (nine years ago) link
i tell them things I am actually into i.e. Love & Rockets comics, Almodovar, 80's techno, shakshuka, puns
― y kant max read (Stevie D(eux)), Monday, 29 December 2014 19:04 (nine years ago) link
same person also asked me if i have any more pics to trade -- dude you've just about seen all there is!
― (曇り) (clouds), Monday, 29 December 2014 19:06 (nine years ago) link
Maybe he meant "pics of trade."
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 29 December 2014 19:07 (nine years ago) link
after some soul searching and honest talk we're gonna hang in there. bewildering x-mas spirits.
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Monday, 29 December 2014 19:13 (nine years ago) link
gl
― J0rdan S., Tuesday, 30 December 2014 00:06 (nine years ago) link
thanks
― languagelessness (mattresslessness), Tuesday, 30 December 2014 00:32 (nine years ago) link
Had a pretty awesome afternoon hookup with a whipsmart younger man. Afterward when we did a couple shots of Jack he said to me:
"You drink like a pussy"
"You are so gay"
Hoping for fuckbuddy status.
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 10 January 2015 22:55 (nine years ago) link
also, I gave him a hickey, and i think he broke my shower nozzle
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 10 January 2015 22:56 (nine years ago) link
:-)
― MaudAddam (cryptosicko), Saturday, 10 January 2015 22:57 (nine years ago) link
Long story about my crazy last couple of days that, I suppose, contains a minority TMI detail: I wound up in the hospital Thursday night with appendicitis, requiring immediate surgery (thankfully, it hadn't yet ruptured, so it was simply a matter of removing it). Earlier in the day, well before I had any clue that any of this was about to go down, my bf had talked me into wearing a yellow jock strap (this one, if the visual helps make the story funnier/more embarrassing) for, um, later. Once I knew that I was going to be having surgery, and hearing that he and my mom were both on their way to the hospital, I texted him with a list of things I wanted him to bring me from home, including some more conservative underwear, given what I knew about the revealing nature of hospital gowns. Unfortunately, the nurse had me change into the gown before the two of them arrived, so i thought the hell with it and shoved the jock in among my jacket and other clothing that they had given me to store my belongings. They finally show up just as I'm about to be wheeled into the OR, and I go in for surgery. The next day, after he picks me up from the hospital, he tells me that the nurse had handed my mom the bag with my belongings in it, and that there was a moment where, looking in the bag, my mom spotted the jock, and laughed. More an instance of TMI for my mom to receive, I suppose, but mildly mortifying for me nonetheless.
― MaudAddam (cryptosicko), Sunday, 11 January 2015 00:59 (nine years ago) link
She probably thought "YESSSSSS"
― fgti, Sunday, 11 January 2015 01:22 (nine years ago) link
Eat it!
― Eric H., Sunday, 11 January 2015 04:38 (nine years ago) link
In the right way, I mean.
― Eric H., Sunday, 11 January 2015 04:39 (nine years ago) link
God bless you and yr jockstrap
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 03:45 (nine years ago) link
Morbs! Where'd you meet?
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 04:02 (nine years ago) link
on the corner
Jesus, the ass on this guy
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 04:04 (nine years ago) link
sharing: http://www.tcj.com/what-was-so-queer-about-comics-in-2014/
― shmup....smug....shmub....shmug.... (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 January 2015 18:54 (nine years ago) link
<3 Elisha Lim
― my booty it clean (fgti), Thursday, 15 January 2015 19:20 (nine years ago) link
i just saw that and i want everything on it
― Jennifer 8.-( (Stevie D(eux)), Thursday, 15 January 2015 19:20 (nine years ago) link
The Young Infidel came over for another afternoon romp. I had to slap him just a little.
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Monday, 19 January 2015 14:55 (nine years ago) link
a discreet circling of wagons!
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 19 January 2015 15:00 (nine years ago) link
he did not like the first 20 mins of Duck Soup, so i am still available for wedlock.
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Monday, 19 January 2015 19:48 (nine years ago) link
Suddenly, so am I!
― Vulvacura (Eric H.), Monday, 19 January 2015 20:25 (nine years ago) link
what, you were on for a Boston marriage?
― touch of a love-starved cobra (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 20 January 2015 18:13 (nine years ago) link
http://www.thefrisky.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/11/boston-main.jpg
― guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 20 January 2015 18:14 (nine years ago) link
is there slang for when theres a mass simultaneous O in group sex? If not can we call it a balaggio?
― turn dog for up (fgti), Saturday, 31 January 2015 15:20 (nine years ago) link
omfg
― Jennifer 8.-( (Stevie D(eux)), Saturday, 31 January 2015 23:33 (nine years ago) link