what's happening to our borad TMI

That's bullshit man pop the fuckin thing cutting it is cheating

sometimes it's too far down and you have no patience

under the skin, that is. not too far down on... well, you know

I had a wisdom tooth out in july and it was so, so much more awful that I'd been led to believe (pain, the extraction with only a local anesthetic, having a giant gaping wound in your mouth, etc).

But the other day I felt something weird near the extraction sit and realized that something hard was stuck to my gum. I finally scraped it off and it turns out it's a chip of tooth or bone that broke off and has been slowly forcing itself to the surface but it came out the side instead of out of the hole. Apparently this isn't uncommon but holy shit it unnerves me.

my parents got sold the full preventative package of tooth maintenance for my mouth when I was a kid, probably because my mom grew up with parents who didn't believe in regular care and is still pissed off about the number of fillings she ended up with as an early teen

so I had four teeth yanked, two that were lingering baby teeth and two that were adult teeth that would have resulted in tooth crowding
then braces
then a couple years without braces
then braces for a few more years
then, right after I entered college, all four wisdom teeth extracted

now they're shifting a little because I felt I was sold a false bill of goods (you'll be all done with this! in a year!) when they told me "btw, here's your retainers, you can wear these the rest of your life I guess"

fuck having teeth is how I break it down to an extent

I bought a bidet. A heated bidet. I am coming up with more excuses to poo every minute.

pooing every minute seems a little extreme

I have no more dangling modifiers; I am whistle-clean

I'd pee sitting down for the promise of a luxurious taint spritz

i went to a podiatrist for the first time in my life 2 weeks ago, had a toenail taken care of

genuinely interested in more information about this heated bidet. a reasonable amount of information, I should say.
are they a thing now?

I keep having mild interest in stuff like that but I live alone and "oh yeah, we have a bidet, isn't that cool" seems like it plays differently than "it's my bidet" as a single dude if someone comes over

i really like bidets, but not the stand alone ones

the japanese washlets are the ones i love -- they're combined with a regular toilet

toto is like the ferrari of bidets if you're interested: https://washlet.totousa.com/index.php

there are some portable ones that you replace your current seat and lid with, but you need to plug it in to an outlet (i think we've touched upon this already on another thread)

once you use it, using toilet paper will sound barbaric

you can even get a built-in blow dryer

my bidet cost $60 on amazon. it fits under the toilet seat. it is neat! it attaches to the hot water line on the sink. there are dials you use to calibrate your perfect bum-washing. with them, you can change the stream's angle to perfectly target your particulars, as well as adjust water pressure and temperature. The spectrum of the latter adjustments allows for customization between slowly trickling Alpine icemelt and F-15 afterburner on full throttle.

the bidet control itself is a little melamine-like two-dial doodad with aluminum knobs that sits just below the tank. it looks very star trek: the original series. the thing has only been in my house one day, but i have already pretended that i am using it to toggle shields and/or speak to a tiny engineer in the medicine cabinet.

only one or two pieces of paper are necessary for blotting dry. i give it **** out of **** little clean rear-ends.

are there presets such that a cohabitant might easily clean his or her rear end in a different manner

"extra wax"

mookie –– no presets. the dials are easily adjustable in exactly the same manner as a regular faucet. turn on, pull up for more pressure. turn left for more heat, right for less. another dial for angle. however! there is also a ladybits cleaner. cohabitant reports aim is appropriate but pressure must be carefully managed.

aww

omg I thought you meant a standalone bidet
I had no idea these things existed
Truly we lived in blessed times

My co-worker has an enormous inflamed whitehead at the very top of her back and is wearing her hair up and a shirt where you can see it at all times and it is absolutely KILLING me. POP THAT SHIT.

She probably ova my knew something was up, but maybe not how awful it was! I had a weird-ass zit behind my earlobe for days -- it seemed big, taught, and painful, but it wasn't until my friend saw it and basically called me a leper and gagged that I realized how gross it was.

It was about the size of a bubble-tea tapioca, very globular, shiny, and red & white.

Seeing it for yourself makes all the difference.

I'd probably have made a run at you with a kitchen knife

i hope you taught it a lesson

hell, at that size it probably was on the verge of growing a mouth and explaining the lesson itself

ate tortilla chips with ghost pepper in them. had a wank an hour later, hadn't washed hands, forgot about chips.

in pain

Oh I've done that. A frisson of excitement that is not worth it

ugh it was bad enough getting toothpaste on it one time in the shower in college

minty

jesus christ, my sinuses are messed up again and I have no idea what I've done wrong

I'm assuming it was allergies and some mediocre nights of sleep that did me in but right now it feels like the eustacian tube on the left side is collapsing and half the time it sounds like I'm in a tunnel

are you in a tunnel y/n

create a tunnel in the shower

breathe in vapours

let one go

breathe in deeply

rinse repeat

On a Megabus
The a/c is on full blast despite it only being 82 outside

Most of us are putting on extra shirts now

ugh I did the shower thing for 20 minutes yesterday, time 2 repeat

i couldn't hear for all of last week w/ the tunnel thing. finally over the past few days it was only for a couple hours at a time and today no problems at all. never happened to me before but 2 ppl irl + you are talking about it. is this new for fall 2016?

i caused a collision in the grocery store because i couldn't hear a man approaching and i stood up and swung my basket into him. i thought it would be too weird to explain that i'm deef.

I've got a sinus thing too!It's not messing with my ears that much, just the occasional popping but I can't taste a goddamn thing and this in on the day when I get to go out for a meal paid for by my job AND someone brought in genuinely top-quality fresh fruit tarts and cream cakes to work.
Had this a while ago and it lasted weeks and was quite depressing.

I watched some internet porn that must have been filmed in the north central United States or nearby Canada. I gave up on finding it erotic but kept watching because of the dadjoke level humor and Fargo-style accents wtf

yah last time i was clicking around porn i - wait for it - came across 1) a video where the setup it that the girl accidentally backs into the guy with her car (amazing acting in this scene) and later he says "i get it, you hit me because you wanted to hit this"; and 2) a video where the guy is a logger and these two hippie girls seduce him in a forest to keep him from cutting down some trees, and the whole time they keep saying "i can't believe we're doing this... but it's for the trees!"

tbh I support way, way more bloggy thinkpieces about porn. We'd add a lot more resolution to our cultural self-portrait than we get from the 900th "I Watched This Week's Prestige Drama And Here's What It Means In 2016" post.

i don't get why porn is so bad, i really dont, like why even bother with a setup?

yah last time i was clicking around porn i - wait for it - came across 1) a video where the setup it that the girl accidentally backs into the guy with her car (amazing acting in this scene) and later he says "i get it, you hit me because you wanted to hit this"; and 2) a video where the guy is a logger and these two hippie girls seduce him in a forest to keep him from cutting down some trees, and the whole time they keep saying "i can't believe we're doing this... but it's for the trees!"

― yolo mostly (sleepingbag), Thursday, October 6, 2016 3:31 AM (five hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ok lol

You see in the old days 2/3 of what was filmed was the setup, Stevie. You kids with your instant gratification don't understand the thrill of watching a half hour of some guy pretending to look under a sink while making puns about "cleaning your pipes"

also lol at sleepingbag's anecdote

Just shit and vomited at the same time. Fuckin' sinuses.

what number on the bristol stool chart would you characterize your stool as being?*

* for my ilxor.xlsx

i've had nearly lifelong sinus problems -- lots of uncontrolled respiratory allergies as a kid, sinus infections, doing everything i could to not pop benadryl all the time or become a permanent mass of infected mouth-breathing

adult life has been cool because allergy meds got a lot better and i just said, fuck it, i'm gonna take a 12 hour sudafed every day

until now where i'm like, fuck, this seems to be less of a prob in the colder season, i'm going to see if i can stop taking decongestants all the damn time

cut to this passage on the wiki for sudafed
Pseudoephedrine is also used as a first-line prophylactic for recurrent priapism. Erection is largely a parasympathetic response, so the sympathetic action of pseudoephedrine may serve to relieve this condition.

have i been taking reverse viagra? what happens when i stop?!

well, friend...

mh, i've also had lifelong issues with sinuses. sudafed was rough for me.
i've found a good answer with daily neti pot in the morning (and in the evenings when it's bad)
and for medication: Singulaire, Fexofenadine, Loratadine; all about half a tab a day.
give it a try!

yeah I do all that on the reg

fexofenadine is a pretty good antihistamine w/ few side effects afaik, i take it almost every day from late august through october

you do all that AND sudafed? dang, yo.

I had a sinus infection a couple years ago right before flying to my friend's wedding and I got some antibiotics, and the doctor was like "dude, do all your shit still, and I normally never say afrin since you get rebound congestion but snort that shit before you fly for sure"

I got some generic stuff but it was in a travel size bottle and I couldn't get it to spray and tilted it. Like 1/8th of a bottle of afrin went right up my nostril and let me tell you I was hyped