Dating With Mental Illness

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it's not a matter of being butthurt, it's matter of refusing to be hurt by other people's self-destructive behavior, esp. when you have no particular control over it. i should live in la-la land and pretend that if i say "gee, i really care about you as a person, and i hate to see you hurting yourself like that", it will make a fucking bit of difference?

new zingland (rushomancy), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:32 (eight years ago) link

you can isolate yourself from toxic people and still have compassion for them

lute bro (brimstead), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:35 (eight years ago) link

ALL ALCHOLICS ARE NOT THE SAME FUCKHEAD

lute bro (brimstead), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:36 (eight years ago) link

i'm definitely not your friend and i'm super proud of it, i still have compassion for your sorry ass, though, lol

lute bro (brimstead), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:37 (eight years ago) link

so many ways we can be condescending to each other. i need to start prepping turkey.

lute bro (brimstead), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:38 (eight years ago) link

we're not all friends here and nobody knows monster mash, but telling people that they're being assholes and that you wish for them to not damage themselves (& hurt others) through substance abuse are, in fact, things that friends do

glandular lansbury (sic), Friday, 18 December 2015 21:46 (eight years ago) link

did i say i didn't have compassion for him? of course i have compassion for him. unfortunately, i've found that "compassion" doesn't translate very well to ascii. look, he didn't start a thread to try and elicit empathy from strangers over the internet. as best i can tell, the man craves human touch. i can't say that me saying that my heart bleeds for him does him any good whatsoever.

new zingland (rushomancy), Friday, 18 December 2015 22:21 (eight years ago) link

let me put it another way. my friends are the people who are there to help me when i need them. if i can't be there for someone when they need me, i'm not going to insult them by claiming to be their "friend".

new zingland (rushomancy), Friday, 18 December 2015 22:46 (eight years ago) link

ilxors sometimes have good content. but for mental illness support type stuff you're better off elsewhere. on ilx you'll get picked apart for every little error.

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:22 (eight years ago) link

and mental illness is error to the people who don't got it

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:22 (eight years ago) link

can't wait for the part where mm says he feels like an ass for drunk posting and then refuses to look upthread for all the people who told him to please get some help with the very pronounced alcoholism

you used to smell me on your smell phone (Abbott), Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:41 (eight years ago) link

people don't like being enablers, which is what we would be doing if we treated you more gently

you used to smell me on your smell phone (Abbott), Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:43 (eight years ago) link

there's a difference between being rude one time and a cycle of behaving badly toward others

there's also a huge difference between apologizing for bad behavior and saying "I'm mentally ill so I post things like that," acting like it's ok to do so

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:48 (eight years ago) link

I just have knee-jerk loathing for public humiliation

when the gaz coombes around (sarahell), Saturday, 19 December 2015 00:59 (eight years ago) link

Chrisht lads its one am and I'd ate the leg off've the lamb of God has anyone chips

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:12 (eight years ago) link

darragh posting on prescription medication > drunk posts imo

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:13 (eight years ago) link

Thanks man thanks

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:14 (eight years ago) link

Have

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:14 (eight years ago) link

Have you any chips at all

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:14 (eight years ago) link

and mental illness is error to the people who don't got it

being mentally ill or alcoholic is not a free pass for assholery

and everyone on ilx is mentally ill

mookieproof, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:16 (eight years ago) link

except darragh, i mean

mookieproof, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:16 (eight years ago) link

there's a difference between being rude one time and a cycle of behaving badly toward others

there's also a huge difference between apologizing for bad behavior and saying "I'm mentally ill so I post things like that," acting like it's ok to do so

― μpright mammal (mh)

but don't forget that there's also a difference between having mental illness and not having mental illness

plus, i don't know anyone whom stands by any of their bad behavior.

but maybe they would stand by "bad" behavior if it was merely "off" and only perceived as bad by some people - particularly those that find error in everything or are overly sensitive.

this is purely off-topic hypothetical stuff. I'm not trying to relate this to any of monster mash's posts

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:24 (eight years ago) link

no one ever deserves a free pass for assholery. just the same as no one ever requests a free pass for assholery.
and again "assholery" is in the eyes of the beholder

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:27 (eight years ago) link

I find it odd that non-mentally ill people think we blame all our behaviors on the mental illness.

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:28 (eight years ago) link

I think pretty much everyone blames them-self for everything

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:32 (eight years ago) link

Have you any chips at all

― darraghmac, Friday, December 18, 2015 6:14 PM (17 minutes ago)

the question that has plagued mankind since day one

you used to smell me on your smell phone (Abbott), Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:33 (eight years ago) link

If I ever commit to writing anything proper its as good a start as any, that concept

xp to mookie im in OK shape but that said it runs in the family and when I say runs I mean we have county medals

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:41 (eight years ago) link

if someone tells you to fuck off, you don't tell them "you of all people should understand"

hey i did post this already

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:42 (eight years ago) link

Ctrl f "you of all people should understand"
Results 2: mh and mh

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:44 (eight years ago) link

There's no set response to someone telling you to fuck off tbf

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:47 (eight years ago) link

Ctrl f "fuck off"
Results 2: mh and mh

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:48 (eight years ago) link

Correction
Results 3: mh mh and darraghghggh (dont know how to read this)

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:49 (eight years ago) link

a sentiment expressed in different phrases, to be sure

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:55 (eight years ago) link

when I say runs I mean we have county medals

tbh it will devastate my worldview if you succumb

mookieproof, Saturday, 19 December 2015 01:57 (eight years ago) link

makes two of us I guess bud

darraghmac, Saturday, 19 December 2015 02:07 (eight years ago) link

mm what are you drinking

home organ, Saturday, 19 December 2015 02:30 (eight years ago) link

1. there's a difference between "blame" and "responsibility"

2. i would suggest that asking an anonymous internet messageboard for advice is not the best course of action for medical crises.

3. the inability or disinclination of certain people to suspend their moral judgment in time of crisis is regrettable.

4. i don't think recrimination is a useful response in this instance.

new zingland (rushomancy), Saturday, 19 December 2015 10:49 (eight years ago) link

I found SSRIs lowered my tolerance to some extent but also made it apparently completely random, like one day on Zoloft I could drink all evening and feel not a lot, and then a few days or weeks later I might have just a couple of drinks and feel completely wrecked

Have had similar experience on Prozac. Although my tolerance also goes up rapidly if I drink for more than 1 day in a row.

Just noise and screaming and no musical value at all. (Colonel Poo), Saturday, 19 December 2015 11:11 (eight years ago) link

which is dangerous because in a portion of the population a number of SSRIs can be a risk factor for liver damage

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 19 December 2015 16:18 (eight years ago) link

1. Numbers make lists
2. Theres a point to this list that no one has ever heard before
3. It's regrettable when people cause problems or make a scene
4. Number 2 was a lie

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 19:02 (eight years ago) link

^srry, just joking around. I dont mean to interject myself in any previous beef between clashing parties in this thread. Seeing ppl drink themselves to death sounds sucky rushomanci

The Once-ler, Saturday, 19 December 2015 19:19 (eight years ago) link

guys i wish i'd read the stuff about SSRIs and alcohol about 10 years ago

cart and spork (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 19 December 2015 19:46 (eight years ago) link

Ime people with alcohol problems don't go on about how much they've drunk so far, it is a shameful secret.
My [let's call her a P.A. today] gave me my Christmas present yesterday, it was vodka in a wooden box with an etched metal plaque thingum saying "Tim, Merry Christmas, Lots of Love, Your favourite PA", i'd post a photo but I lost my phone. I gave her socks, she seemed to like them. Then we went to pub, but she was working for the Old People today so she wasn't drinking and she went home before I was ready to leave, I went to walk home and woke up in a big pile of gravel in a yard somewhere, couldn't find my phone. I'll not blame my behaviour on mental illness, maybe I'll blame it on alcohol/SSRI combination, thaks for that.
I rewrote the 12 days of Christmas song for [Her], I lost my phone with the final version but according to my scrawled notes it was something like
12 Marvel films
11 songs for Laura
10 points for style
9 Swedish meatballs
8 treats for Kenny
7 former moonmen
6 sides of Sandinista!
FIIIIVE STURRIDGE GOOOOALS
4 shots of jaeger
3 fags to get home
2 avocados
and a moothie in the key of C
(most of that is in-jokes specially for her but there you go.)
She definitely likes me, but I'm not sure if she likes me. My [uh former fiancee] was making comments about her last night, which is actually a good sign, because on experience that tends to happen with anyone who might be considering sleeping with me.
I don't know if I'll see [my P.A.] again before Christmas, I was meant to be getting lift to Pub today from [an elser] to watch Newcastle-Villa with a Geordie, but I lost my phone so I never sorted the exact arrangements out and no one turned up at my door so hey-ho (prolly dodged a bullet there tbh, that is the least appealing fixture I can imagine). She'll surely be in Pub on Christmas Eve, then I could serenade her on the Christmas karaoke that is planned, but I have prior commitments that evening. Which I'm now considering fecking off in order to go sleaze on my employee. But I never went to a good school and I don't own any nice sweaters, so I will no doubt die alone.

Jonathan Hellion Mumble, Sunday, 20 December 2015 00:16 (eight years ago) link

NV have you had actual problems with that?

μpright mammal (mh), Sunday, 20 December 2015 04:01 (eight years ago) link

it accounts for probably the worst phase of my self-destructiveness. the effects people have been describing on here - at the time, i had a vaguely guilty sense that drinking was probably just stopping the meds from working as effectively as they could.

but i learned eventually by accident, or at least i stopped doing all that shit to myself once i'd sufficiently wrecked my life.

cart and spork (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 20 December 2015 09:13 (eight years ago) link

people with alcohol problems don't go on about how much they've drunk so far

btw this is so not true as to be meaningless

cart and spork (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 20 December 2015 09:16 (eight years ago) link

true but you did cut off the ime at the start!

Über, Über mensch (wins), Sunday, 20 December 2015 09:31 (eight years ago) link

hey it's the ilx equivalent of "with respect"

cart and spork (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 20 December 2015 09:35 (eight years ago) link

IME = My Father, My Mother, The Swedish Lady, myself, them old boys at the pub pissing themselves on the barstools, that's the only alcoholics I know really. The only people talking about their intake were the 22 year old attention seekers who would tell the lassies about their time in prison for killing the guy who beat their pregnant girlfriend and made her miscarry, despite the fact that I've not seen them away from the village for 2 days since they were a child, and you know it was him killed them kittens, right? Also, who calculates their home drinking in "shots"?

Jonathan Hellion Mumble, Sunday, 20 December 2015 10:17 (eight years ago) link


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