what's happening to our borad TMI

Dreaming about sleeping with someone that you really shouldn't have

that second you wake up and realize you had a sex dream about a relative or someone you think of as a relative and want to vom

only children ftw

I had a sex dream about Shaquille O'Neal.

It was awkward

I believe I had kung pao shrimp for the first time last night

In future I will plan on needing an extra 30 minutes to leave the house the next morning

9-yo niece (worst behaved child i've ever been around) still awake at midnight, crying bcz Santa will gyp her

my room is next to hers

raising her has turned my sister into a ranting psycho

bro-in-law got up mid-lunch at restaurant today and said "I may or may not come back."

Christmas is poison; i will be out of the country next year to avoid this shitshow

merry christmas, morbs!

May not return to dinner or to the marriage?

not visiting one's family-of-origin at Xmas is the greatest gift you can give yourself imo, ymmv obviously but my m does not v

F-o-o fighters

not visiting one's family-of-origin at Xmas is the greatest gift you can give yourself imo, ymmv obviously but my m does not v

― tremendous crime wave and killing wave (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Friday, December 25, 2015 4:40 PM (15 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

feeling this

Two days ago a friend made a joke loosely about waking up with "a cucumber in your butt." Then yesterday I was watching Master of None and there was a joke about a guy with "a cucumber in his butt". So, two references, specifically to cucumbers, and specific to butts, in less than 36 hours (I asked my friend, and he's never watched Master of None). But what does it all mean?

It means people are starting to catch on.

make sure to sanitize the cucumber before eating it

But why is cucumber more popular than/superior to similarly shaped veg?

Did not happen to our board

But why is cucumber more popular than/superior to similarly shaped veg?

Structural integrity.

read "veg" as "vag", had a very different response in mind

vagina-in-butt is the next big thing itt

^^^kinda how chickens have sex tbh

you speak of cloacas

YOU SPEAK OF CLOACAS
*quiet murmuring amongst the crowd*
he CLOaca cloAca speaks of cloACA speaks of he CLOACA
SILENCE barks the medicine man and as one the assembled villagers draw themselves quiet, their frightened eyes peering as one at the outsider
So... the medicine man sits cross-legged before him, one hand sifting the red sand of the ground
So... you want to know of ....
... cloacas...

someone just tried to use my debit card number to make a $233 purchase at PUMA.

thought Munky was doing better than this financially....

My knee finally clicked back into place :)

last night i was trying to get into the groove of some pussy eating and i suddenly realized there was like barely any flesh between my clitoris and a skull, there was basically a big scary skull enveloping to my clit, and i sort of freaked out, imagining this creepy floating skull D:

oh god

moments like these are one of life's little rewards for those of us who've spent years cultivating a very warm and happy feeling about skulls

Or yknow about

.. Pelvic bones.

I just dropped in to talk about how happy I was about some earwax falling out of my ear. Made an audible little thud when it landed on my pants.

yearly checkup got a bit awkward when doctor was thumping on my belly and says "you seem a bit bloated, has that been a problem lately" and I'm forced to tell her i would've liked to have taken a shit before we got to this point but the bathroom was locked and i'm hoping we can get this done with as soon as possible.

jeez, I'm gonna be thinking about the skull thing next time!

bradbury story where protagonist freaks out at realization that inside him, underneath, hidden, is this terrifying symbol, always was missing something

they call it head for a reason, ppl

They also have a reason for not calling it 'skull' tbf

they call it "getting brain" for a reason, ppl

ppl really do call it "skullfucking" tho

tho tbh that's slightly different

Speaking on the subject, has anyone experienced getting acne/spots on their nose after particularly lengthy sessions of pussy eating? This has never happened to me before!

Do you wash your face regularly (pussy eating doesn't count)?

Yeah, I do, twice a day. And I rarely get acne on my nose, but lately there have been two different times when there were multiple small spots there the morning after cunnilingus. In the past I've never noticed this happening in conjuction with said activity, but if there's a one more occurence on top of the first two, it'll be hard to ignore the pattern.

Does it happen when yr rimming

it's probably cancer tbh

Oh, I hadn't actually thought about rimming! I guess that could be a more likely explanation.

This calls for a comparative study.

definitely GISed "skull eating pussy" because of this thread, results are...pretty much what you'd expect

if only there was a booty cleaner on hand

i'm sorry, i don't feel that i have anything to add to this conversation; all of this is well outside my areas of expertise.

THE BOOTYS OF FINLAND NEED YOU!

How much energy does my body spend growing absurdly long nose and ear hairs? I misplace my ear-hair trimmer for a week and it's like a goddamned overgrown plantation.