what's happening to our borad TMI

I'll tell you what I love putting inside my nose when it feels dry is Burt's Bees peppermint chapstick. That shit fixes everything.

otm

I'm late to this but vaseline, people, vaseline.

I ended up blowing the nipple butter out of my nose about five minutes after I put it up there. It felt to weird and wrong and bad so I decided to just have a bloody, boogery nose instead.

I'm not sure u aren't MVP material right now tbph

yah, that's the issue with creams and salves. TRY PONARIS carl ag.

NO.

i don't have this blowing salve out problem, i guess i only put in a little?

So I have IBS and went to the dr for it for the first time in the fall. It hasn't gotten any better and is, in fact, a lot worse so I'm going for a follow-up on Thursday. The thing is, the last time I was there I did something dumb and I'm embarrassed to go back. He gave me a gown and said to get undressed etc. so not knowing how much to take off and being used to mostly getting that kind of instruction at the lady doc's I took off everything and then he came back and prodded on my belly for a while while I was pubes up like "Hi, have you met my bush?" It was kind of mortifying! I totally could have left my underwear on. :( At least I know for this time and I know he's a doctor etc but it was . . . awkward.

looool

no matter how much i try to remember that they are doctors or nurses or whatever i am always a little embarrassed, plus those hospital gowns are just ridiculous to wear

i had a stomach virus once and they needed a bowl sample, i was sooooooo mortified to have to shit in a bowl and give it to the nurse. she was rad though and was like "you can tell a lot about a guy from his shit"

"bowl sample"

lol stool sample obv

worst flirtation

Lol!

He did stick his fingers up my ass so if we were gonna get that close then I figure he could handle a glimpse of vulva BUT STILL. I will know better this time.

Bah I endured a six-month long ordeal to attempt to find out what was wrong with my guts that required, among other indignities, me to poop in a plastic bowl at home and bring samples into a lab and everything about it was mortifying. The worst thing was that at the end of it all, the gastro was just like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I don't know man. Maybe you just need a vacation, which made me burst into tears, to which he responded, "Do you always react so emotionally to things?" He was an awful, awful man.

oof fuck that guy that's horrible

Yeah and the entire time he was pushing me to take major doses of steroids as a diagnostic tool to determine whether I had some kind of IBD, which I didn't and still don't think is the problem, while I was like "Can I try I don't know, cutting out dairy first?" instead of jumping the prednisone train to side effect city? I switched to a different gastro so I could continue to get my beloved GERD medication and declined to mention any other problems. My entire IBS (it's probably IBS, I'm guessing) management plan is to get a raise so we can afford an apartment with two bathrooms.

Anyway, ENBB, good luck and I am interested in hearing how things go!

"Maybe you just need a vacation, which made me burst into tears, to which he responded, "Do you always react so emotionally to things?" He was an awful, awful man.

― from batman to balloon dog (carl agatha), Tuesday, March 10, 2015 12:17 PM (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink"

KILL KILL KILL

Thanks, CA. I am too! The last time I went the guy was like well we often prescribe SSRIs for IBS since it's thought to be stress related blah blah blah. I've been sick for months now. There just has to be something they can do. I swear to god if he tells me something like that I'm going to burst into tears too.

If it happens, I will be spiritually at your side, yelling at that asshole and/or validating your feelings.

awww ty! <3

i did five(?) years of chronic and incapacitating mystery stomach cramps (that hospitalized me on and off for a week and a half, did CAT scans, MRIs, an endoscope, a colonoscopy, loads of blood tests, visited five specialists (including a dietician, a biofeedback trainer and a proctologist), took four years of lithium derivative pills, tried a dozen OTC pills, saw a psychotherapist for three months, fasted, cut out various potentially damaging food types, etc etc and finally discovered a year ago that the problem was pretty definitely greek yogurt. since cutting it out of my diet, I've not had a single episode. I probably spent 10k on this and untold emotional and mental damage and it was fucking Fage.

omg

that's insane!

oof, that's meze

i'm pleased it's apparently dealt with (knock wood cross fingers pray a little) but i feel like an idiot when family and friends ask if my "stomach problems" have gotten better and i have to be like uh yeah it was yogurt go figure. given the pain and impact it had on my life, i wanted to point to a bezoar or something

I had henoch schonlein purpura for 2 months in undergrad, and every gastro or internal medicine person kept telling me it was IBS or stress related abdominal pain. But we'd be like 'but I have purple spots on my skin and my feet are swollen. the internet says this is henoch schonlein purpura.' Finally, a dermatologist diagnosed it as such from a biopsy, and she even wrote a conference paper about it. smdh at those doctors who'd look down upon dermatologists.

so fascinating forks. i know extremely little about stomach/intestinal issues but i would've thought that yogurt and other fermented foods would help beneficial gut bacteria to flourish and thus alleviate some problems. obv there are tons of different causes for gastrointestinal shit though

obviously so did I! And nobody ever questioned it. I started eating greek yogurt daily when it started getting popular in the US: http://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?action=showall&boardid=77&threadid=71070
(maybe the ailing was comeuppance for insensitive threadtitle?)
anyway, i never made the connection because it was really just breakfast! and who could fault yogurt!
But one day last winter i went out to a greek restaurant and we ordered a huge thing of sweet greek yogurt for dessert and i ate half of it and it devastated me for three days.
so i put two and two together and stopped with all yogurt. And the pain stopped! I really really really miss yogurt. but man, i was ready to do exploratory surgery. it was a huge shift.
it also taught me how fucked up chronic pain can be. totally does away with optimism.

I have some kind of thing where last summer I decided to eat like a TON of peanuts for some fucking reason and I came down with diarrhea for almost a week. Like I had bought a big jar of them and just absentmindedly snacked on them all day at work. I didn't have any other symptoms besides diarrhea and cramping.

Now any time I eat raw peanuts, I get watery stools at the very least. I can eat peanut butter without any repercussions. I could eat it by the spoonful. But I guess the nuts themselves are so rugged and fibrous that I broke my guts eating them.

I caught the diarrhea in the weirdest way too. I was standing there in the bathroom at work taking a possibility when I see this centipede crawling around by my feet. I start trying to do this weird dance/balancing act because I need to avoid the centipede but also maintain control of my stream. As I shifted my position, I indulged myself in the urge to fart and then realized that everything had gone wrong. I had to toss out my underwear and go commando the rest of the day, with intermittent trips to the bathroom to shit.

Taking a possibility = taking a piss

lol I thought "taking a possibility" was standing up to pee at a urinal while waiting to see whether you also had to poop.

IANAD but my grandmother has diverticulitis and cannot eat nuts without a reaction similar to what you describe.

Forks, what an ordeal. Chronic pain really is a monster, and our health/disability system/overall mindset is not set up to handle it at all. Also I can eat yogurt but get very very nauseated when I take any other kind of probiotic or eat anything that is labeled as probiotic. I wonder if it's a similar thing...

Guts are so fucking weird. Every time I read about gut bacteria transplants I wonder how I can get in line for a clinical trial. Who knows! It might fix my guts, my weight, my anxiety, my career, my tendency to take on more projects than I can reasonably complete, my tendency towards impatience...

one love toward the IBS issues you're going through; i hope you can figure what the issue ends up being. Nobody ever diagnosed a problem, even now... and the doctors I've asked about it generally respond that if they can't diagnose it, that's the best case scenario as it's nothing that's life threatening or clearly long term damaging. They are conveniently ignoring the possibility that they just can't find the problem, but still.

That fecal transplant therapy has some serious proponents: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2014/12/01/excrement-experiment

but for the love of god, find a specialist; i can't even look at this DIY url without gagging a bit, much less the HUK blender in the HUK article GAG: http://thepowerofpoop.com/epatients/fecal-transplant-instructions/

Yeah, I'm not too keen on playing medical detective with my guts any more, so it's all about management strategies for now, which is fine. I'm waiting for a medical breakthrough before I get back on that merry go round.

No way am I clicking on that link much less DIYing a fecal transplat. Gag indeed.

omg

http://thepowerofpoop.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/poop-in-blender-1024x725.jpg

That's basically the "before" picture of the blender. ;__;

oh no no non nonoansdfiona;sdfkl fuck!!!

oh no i'm so genuinely sorry!! i thought the blender was empty b/c the image was much smaller on the page!!!!

bwahaha

I'm coming to your house after work to poop in your blender.

Fecal transplants are fascinating to me, like there was a story somewhere recently where a thin woman got one from her overweight daughter and gained a shitload of weight in a couple of months; I would so love the reverse of this.

The only really embarrassing thing I've had at the doctors was during fertility treatments (which I fully admit were much, much more invasive and challenging for my wife) when I had to give a sample at the doctor's office. I had to walk down the hall full of clinic staff to the special room with a big TV and a bunch of porn DVDs and magazines so everyone knew I what I was up to. I was also really curious about who had to go out from the office to buy the porn, and was wondering what sort of past problems led to them having a space heater in the jerk off room.

Fecal transplants are fascinating to me, like there was a story somewhere recently where a thin woman got one from her overweight daughter and gained a shitload of weight in a couple of months; I would so love the reverse of this.

WOAH that's fascinating!

dude's with shriveled balls!

idk if that's actually a problem

There was some stuff that came out a while ago about the importance of intestinal bacteria and its effect on adult weight which even suggested that babies born via c-section might be at higher risk of being overweight as adults because by not passing through the mama vadges they missed out on ingesting/being exposed to bacteria that effected the intestinal flora and in turn somehow played a part in weight. So fucking weird but awesome.

http://www.bbc.com/news/health-31168511

Also I unintentionally used "shitload" up there but really is probably accurate.

So weird.

ah god all of this

just be glad je55e posted the BEFORE blender