what's happening to our borad TMI

Sex w/ three different new women in 10 days. I feel very slutty.

today i started thinking seriously about what men with twenty inch dicks do in public restrooms. do they arch it up like a rainbow and dangle it over the urinal like a hose? do they step back another foot from the urinal and hold it forward perpendicularly in front of them? do they use a stall instead and risk dunking their dick into the toilet water, or at the very least, creating suspicion and confusion due to the low volume level (because the stream is entering the water from the giant dick hovering only an inch or two above the water)?

or maybe they just piss directly into a sac on the inside of their pantlegs, down in the shin area, as they're walking around going about their daily activities? maybe you see a guy like that in the post office, buying stamps, peeing on the inside.

if someone with a twenty inch penis could let me know how it works i'd appreciate it

should be in your inbox now, you're welcome

TMD

15" is the sweet spot. I find.

hahahaha

today the TMI thread graduated from poop to pee. so proud

I love my boo but I can't wait to sleep alone tonight for the first time since Dec 21. #nevermovingin

In his sleep he's basically the abominable snowman from Looney Tunes who wants to hug and pet something and squeeze it till its eyes pop out. I haven't slept through the night in almost two weeks.

does he choose to do that or does he literally sleep-squeeze you without knowing it

I hope he doesn't call you George. Unless that's a thing.

oh man, that sounds awful. awkward to complain about, too, i imagine!

I think he's asleep, not that being awake stops him either.

zs: Not at all! I usually get in a good rant at him the next morning. (I'm a lot of fun at parties.)

i think i might suffer from this condition

You sir are a pox on the earth.

Updaet: I slept 7 consecutive hours last night without interruption. It was glorious.

get him a body pillow or large teddy bear to put between you and him while you sleep

you can name it George, and he can squeeze it

aw he was cuddly when we met him too it is a superior peesonality trait in a big tough guy imo

I agree which is why I <3 him.

tbh I love nothing more than cuddling nonstop all through the night

that's not true i love a lot of things more but I do rly love cuddling all through the night

You should date my boyfriend immed, he can fall asleep in the most torturous position as long as every arm and leg is wrapped around me like a predatory starfish.

pic?

http://www.seastarsofthepacificnorthwest.info/images/Predators%20and%20prey/6L.jpg

lol

ha

what about his penis?

I assumed that thing on the left was the penis

that's what remains of the victim (in orbit)

not the starfish's penis

it is stuck between spoons iirc

he doesn't put it near an orifice?

i had a starfish-like ex who would do that as well -- it was v nice, though occasionally it led to impromptu 3am sex or at least attempted sex

Oh no, genital contact is incidental to starfishing ime.

Does his penis evert?

Slightly awkward at restaurants but that's love for ya, you gotta take people as they are.

this is why i think sex and sleep should be separated by as many hours as possible

i cleaned three booty last night and one of them was REALLY gross but now they are clean

That is three more booty than I have ever cleaned in my life! Good work, booty cleaner!

I love being gently mauled while I'm going to sleep and I like being the inflictor of the starfishing too. I'll handle sleepover duty in shifts w/ Stevie.

My wife will starfish me against a wall in the middle of the night. I'm a really big guy and she's pretty little, but she smooshes me into a really small space, so that we're occupying less than half of a queen-size bed. I've taken to just straight-up pushing her to the other side of the bed to reclaim my space.

xp My heroes!

I had this thread conflated with the booty-eating thread in my mind and misread the subject of "starfishing" quite egregiously for several posts

I just blew my nose so hard that a big spatter of teardrops shot out into my eye and glasses. Never had that happen before.

this time of year I never know if blowing my nose is going to be a normal thing or if being in a super-dry climate part of the time is going to result in a giant blood clot snot cluster flying out

Someone described an area where I farted recently as smelling like a "rotten Jolly Rancher."

#fart

you know the worst way to spend your last night before another 9 weeks of chemo? Eating a poisonous burrito.

stay strong fella

i'm getting i.v. and oral steroids for the first 3 weeks, so maybe.