Maybe you're evolving into a katydid.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stridulation
― Plasmon, Monday, 6 January 2014 00:06 (ten years ago) link
I ate sooooooo much Ethiopian today (meat combo platter) and my poop was so strange and stinky
― queen bey backers (Stevie D(eux)), Monday, 6 January 2014 04:11 (ten years ago) link
being sick "at both ends" for the first 6 days of the year = fucking awesome
― eclectic husbandry (Dr Morbius), Monday, 6 January 2014 16:12 (ten years ago) link
I have made an exciting discovery about the kind of scaly patch of follicles I have on the back of my inner thigh (possibly keratosis pilaris since you didn't ask), which is that if I sit cross-legged the hollow forms a resonant chamber and scratching my bare leg-scales results in a noise not unlike those wooden frogs whose backs make a ribbiting noise
this could be the start of a beautiful new career
― not a player-hater i just hate a lot (a passing spacecadet), Sunday, January 5, 2014 11:28 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Love this. Love you, aps!
― Horreur! What are this disassociated lumps of (in orbit), Monday, 6 January 2014 16:18 (ten years ago) link
I did a lot of dishes over the weekend and appear to have lizard skin on one hand now
― mh, Monday, 6 January 2014 16:22 (ten years ago) link
oh btw no puking here, just congestion to go with the gastric distress, so not classic SaBE.
― eclectic husbandry (Dr Morbius), Monday, 6 January 2014 16:27 (ten years ago) link
i'm stressed to the max, i've got hella PMS, and i'm freezing
― mambo jumbo (La Lechera), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:16 (ten years ago) link
What you need is a manicure. But that's what I always say.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:18 (ten years ago) link
Some hot towel wraps, a hand massage, and some glitter.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:19 (ten years ago) link
ehhhh i'd settle for a bath and some loud music
― mambo jumbo (La Lechera), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:23 (ten years ago) link
but if someone wanted to give me a glittery manicure while i'm in the bath and talk to me over the loud music i guess that would be ideal
― mambo jumbo (La Lechera), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:24 (ten years ago) link
here's a question for the middle-aged men:
when a doctor gives you a prostate exam, is it supposed to feel like he is attempting to use your prostate to frantically buzz in on a game show?
― SHAUN (DJP), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:25 (ten years ago) link
Why don't people hang out in bathrooms more? No scratch that, why are bath tubs in the bathroom and not in someplace you don't put the toilet? Like say the bedroom. Or the library.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:26 (ten years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/Xb9DMl5.jpg
― |$̲̅(̲̅ιοο̲̅)̲̅$̲̅| (gr8080), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:29 (ten years ago) link
yeeeeeeeeeeeesman i am dyingget me out of here
― mambo jumbo (La Lechera), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:29 (ten years ago) link
Yes, Dan, of course. Were you not privvy to that info, man?!
― What do I think? Compensez-vous! (Michael White), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:29 (ten years ago) link
xxp Perfect. An ashtray, a place to put a wineglass, and either conversation or a book in reach--otherwise I'm going to be very bored in about 10 minutes. Relaxing is not my strong suit.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:30 (ten years ago) link
in orbit, my gf and I used to live in a flat with a separate bathroom and wc. Ideally, you'd have a bathroom and a WC with a sink and a bidet like a truly civilized person but there's little less disobliging than having to malodorously void your bowels while somebody is getting all clean in the shower/bath - kinds harshes their buzz, n'est-ce pas?
― What do I think? Compensez-vous! (Michael White), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:32 (ten years ago) link
I was not, it was very surprising.
― SHAUN (DJP), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:35 (ten years ago) link
http://www.fengshuidana.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/062408_bathtubinbed.jpg
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:35 (ten years ago) link
at one point the phrase NO WHAMMIES popped into my head and I had to stifle a full-on guffaw
good plan, I think laughing makes you clench
― mh, Friday, 24 January 2014 22:39 (ten years ago) link
LL, do u get to go home soon? I hope yes.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 24 January 2014 22:50 (ten years ago) link
is it supposed to feel like he is attempting to use your prostate to frantically buzz in on a game show?
In my (one) experience, yes. My PCP said, "This doesn't work, but we do it anyway to torture people."
― eclectic husbandry (Dr Morbius), Monday, 27 January 2014 15:50 (ten years ago) link
Five weeks w/o sex and I'm going nuts. I know that it gets easier - pre-last relationship drought was 2 years - but goddamn it's tough to start out.
― Kiarostami bag (milo z), Friday, 31 January 2014 02:46 (ten years ago) link
I've never understood this.
― pplains, Friday, 31 January 2014 02:50 (ten years ago) link
there is a thread for that sort of whining, this is the other thread
― mh, Friday, 31 January 2014 03:49 (ten years ago) link
I hope pp was talking about getting joybuzzered tho
― mh, Friday, 31 January 2014 03:50 (ten years ago) link
Last night I had an extended dream where I was having a 3-way w/ a man and a woman and the guy kept giving me pointers and encouragement w/r/t cunnilingus. It was an extremely detailed dream. The woman got bored and wound up having a penis, so I just switched to that.
― Je55e, Saturday, 1 February 2014 17:12 (ten years ago) link
I'm home doing my colonoscopy prep, and it's everything you've heard.
― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 9 February 2014 22:11 (ten years ago) link
go lightly my friend
― gbx, Sunday, 9 February 2014 22:13 (ten years ago) link
Haven't heard anything, but maybe your neighbors have.
― pplains, Sunday, 9 February 2014 22:13 (ten years ago) link
think I will just hole up in the john for the next 5 hours
― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 9 February 2014 22:14 (ten years ago) link
hole down! hole down!
― föllakzoidberg (electricsound), Sunday, 9 February 2014 22:17 (ten years ago) link
These dosage instructions were clearly excessive, as I've only been shitting Gatorade for the last hour.
― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Monday, 10 February 2014 04:10 (ten years ago) link
the experience of massive evacuation without a horrible stomachache or other intestinal distress seems so weird
― mh, Monday, 10 February 2014 16:07 (ten years ago) link
have lovely pics of my colon, no polyps. will scan and sell asap.
now i have to train my innards to process food normally again.
― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Monday, 10 February 2014 21:03 (ten years ago) link
hurrah no polyps!
― joe perry has been dead for years (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Tuesday, 11 February 2014 00:51 (ten years ago) link
rahnopolpys now
― selfie bans make dwight the yorke (darraghmac), Tuesday, 11 February 2014 00:53 (ten years ago) link
man if I had a dollar for every bowel prep I've ordered in the last week I'd have...three dollars
― gbx, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 00:55 (ten years ago) link
seems like a good time for this anecdote
one of my friends was a grad student in computer science and they were working on a joint project with the mayo clinic. he was programming an analysis for colonoscopy videos -- basically it'd highlight regions that looked problematic, assisting the doctor in review
he was working on error handling for a couple weeks, mostly situations where the camera fell out. so, yeah, he had to watch the video to debug the code and basically watched the camera falling out of and being reinserted into rectums for a week
― mh, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 03:06 (ten years ago) link
wow, that really makes my intensive kanye listening into perspective
― sarahell, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 03:07 (ten years ago) link
would excelsior but too blatant a grab for glory imo
― mookieproof, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 03:12 (ten years ago) link
Those prep meds can have wildly different results? I know someone who was told it wouldn't take effect for several hours and ended up being at, like, the symphony or something. Horrible prospect.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Tuesday, 11 February 2014 03:26 (ten years ago) link
wait what someone told your friend to do a bowel prep and was all "yeah cool go to the symphony nbd"??
UH
― gbx, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 03:58 (ten years ago) link
I'm sure the docs would have said, for the love of god stay home, but the patient was told there was an hours-longer window that there ended up being, I guess?
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Tuesday, 11 February 2014 04:05 (ten years ago) link
*than there
lol it's more like "it might not kick in immediately, give it a little time"
Going to the symphony.... oh man
― mh, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 04:08 (ten years ago) link
cleanse diet?http://www.walgreens.com/store/c/walgreens-magnesium-citrate-saline-laxative-oral-solution-lemon/ID=prod5601649-product
check it out, for under $3 you can remove everything in your digestive tract, no prescription needed! what a world.
― mh, Tuesday, 11 February 2014 04:13 (ten years ago) link
Why on Earth would you make any plans to go anywhere if you were doing a bowel cleanse? Unless you really just want to share your bowel contents with others, in which case Godspeed to you and yuk
― Fight the Powers that Be with this Powerful Les Paul! (DJP), Tuesday, 11 February 2014 04:22 (ten years ago) link