what's happening to our borad TMI

And then someone tells her that she's in the majority of all female experience and she dances around the room saying, "I'm normal! There's nothing wrong with me!" and just...like...

I mean all of her doctors need to be marooned on an island with few natural resources and several natural predators, obviously.

How does anyone go through life and not realize that most women don't orgasm through intercourse. I mean read one magazine.

staying out of this thread cuz this kind of thing drives me demented with rage and i swear that doesn't happen that often

maybe i should take A FUCKING PILL

Of course you're right in that her doctors should have filled her in but I'm pretty sure I knew that way before I ever even had sex.

Seriously if I could even figure out the number of people I've dated who have said, "I don't get it, none of my other girlfriends ever had this problem" the statistic you'd get out of their anecdotal recollections would be the opposite of the real one, and ever higher.

*even

Some people are not.... literate

lol oh dear

so delusional!

"I don't get it, none of my other girlfriends ever had this problem"

this is when you're supposed to put on shades and say:
"Well, I guess you're not... the solution"

Damn, I should take you with me next time, I never think of lines like that.

I pop out from behind the nightstand in a David Caruso costume, but there are fees involved

Yeah, that'll bring on an orgasm.

my TMI update: I am finding myself mezmerized by erotic/porn gif tumblrs. I've been kind of uninterested/burnt out on porn for a while, but somehow these are way more compelling, partly because the ones I'm looking at use higher quality and less gross porn, but also something about the repetitive moving images.

a+ segue

(unlurks)

cream + sugar tmblr is good for those kinda gifs, xpost. lots of photos but some good gifs

(relurks)

confusion: Metamucil and Imodium in one's week

It is a delicate balance.

Or you take both and somehow your colon disappears, idk

has nearly happened

this was recommended to me by a doctor recently. i haven't tried it yet.

i am the worst fucking self-nurse, just wiped out 24 hours of 'progress'

:(

Damn frustrating.

I'm not saying this because I'm any good at it, but I think in recovery it's important to forgive your body for being fallible/fragile? Its timetable is different from the mental self's no matter how much we rage. I wish you patience (i know, right?) with your physicality, Morbs.

It just gets old to spend an entire weekend barely being able to move OR eat...

Ah but your girlish figure.

If you could, what would you WANT to eat? Do you dream about food? Or is there nausea that makes the idea of eating not even a pleasure?

I wanted to eat what I had for breakfast this morning, and it was 'too soon.' Not nausea, other unpleasantness.

I do not dream about food.

when you dream about playing for the mets, what position do you play

I can't even dream about playing Fantasy Camp with the oldies.

sometimes get this kinda trapped/pinched nerve in my undercarriage that essentially gives me a dry orgasm during certain movements- eg getting out of a low seat. happened getting out of the car after football this evening. i'd get it checked out but with my luck they'd cure me.

haha i kind of have that. when i'm making my bed and i lift a blanket up high it tickles.

ha it must be more common than i thought, tho obv nobody's going to talk about it in ireland, figures

where was i when they were passing this shit out

can only advise that you get a lowish car and take up football, idk

i def need an autogasm trigger put in for the duration of limpy elderly ambulation

it's not actually that pleasant. that's like the only time it happens though, never with heavier things or getting out of cars.

im harbling

too little information

fell asleep mid-whack last night. it was a much-needed whack and i'm feeling all backed up today, like my liver is swimming in frustrated jizz.

Hahaha I do that all the time. I always wonder if my husband comes to bed and sees me with my hand tucked in the pyjama bottoms.

I did that once with a mag still open on the the bed beside me. My parents were not impressed when they woke me up in the morning. It was a copy of Oui, I think.

90% of the dudes i've dated are lanky beanpoles who could change lightbulbs without having to stand on a kitchen chair to do it. even that one time i was a lesbian homegirl weighed, like, fourteen fucking pounds. what is it with skinny dudes and big asses? THAT SHIT IS DANGEROUS, BRO. every time i bang one i have to kick him out right after because i can't afford to stay awake half the night trying to make sure i don't roll over and absorb this little motherfucker into one of my stomach folds. i'm tired, you anorexic sonofabitch! TAKE YOUR SKINNY ASS THE FUCK HOME.

http://bitchesgottaeat.blogspot.com/

o_O

are you quoting this for truth or for comic effect?

I read a few of her posts, kind of half-sold half-offended on her comedic stylings

Little from column A, little from column B....

pssh, if she thinks she has a big ass, and 90% of the people she is dating are lanky dudes, then maybe she likes lanky dudes and not vice versa

I was just talking about Bitches Gotta Eat on another thread! I love her.