what's happening to our borad TMI

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The thing is not designed to be a sex toy, though. I mean, it's become THE vibrator I realize, but it really was designed as something you use to massage your back. So maybe the thrift store people were just super innocent.

homosexual II, Monday, 7 May 2012 19:27 (twelve years ago) link

there is some difference of opinion out there on whether such vibrating things were ever completely naive

mh, Monday, 7 May 2012 20:30 (twelve years ago) link

MW until recently marketed solely as a back or neck massager, at least officially. Amazon reviews for these are interesting, apparently about 1/3 of buyers bought it for back pain and were unaware of any alternate use.

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 21:01 (twelve years ago) link

Right, I guess what I mean is that it's not 'designed' per se to be a sex toy - not dishwasher safe, not boilable. Definitely shouldn't be shared. You have to plug the dumb thing in, and it's as loud as fuck. On the whole, it's not that great.

homosexual II, Monday, 7 May 2012 21:08 (twelve years ago) link

but not as loud as the DeWalt orbital power sander, which is the best sex toy ever invented. (if you attach soft spongy things to the velcro rather than sandpaper of course)

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 21:49 (twelve years ago) link

o_O

mh, Monday, 7 May 2012 21:54 (twelve years ago) link

There are several cordless orbital power sanders on the market, which have lots of largely unexplored possibilities. The magic is in the orbital head movement - it doesn't just vibrate back and forth, but side to side in random directions, different every time, which is why they make great..... back massagers. Noisy ones, though.

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 21:59 (twelve years ago) link

Yeah, I refinished a wood floor with one of those but I don't know that you're going to find anything to put on it that is going to, uh, soften the abrasive effect enough for more personal purposes

mh, Monday, 7 May 2012 22:11 (twelve years ago) link

Thick sponges or soft, strategically-shaped silicone molds work well. The larger ones suitable for floor sanding wouldn't work well, but small ones with 3 inch circular heads would suffice. I've seen small triangular heads on these too ("corner sanders") which would be ideal, but not sure if they were orbital which is U&K.

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 22:31 (twelve years ago) link

like this:
http://benchmark.20m.com/reviews/FestoolDeltex93/FestoolDeltexHero.gif

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 22:37 (twelve years ago) link

i conjecture this will not be happening to a significant percentage of our board.

estela, Monday, 7 May 2012 22:55 (twelve years ago) link

below the belt sander

the aower of aussy (electricsound), Monday, 7 May 2012 22:57 (twelve years ago) link

i've heard of this before when i shared an office with someone who listened to howard stern.

booblights and the eternal frustration (how's life), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:07 (twelve years ago) link

I beat off w/ a jigsaw

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:08 (twelve years ago) link

that piece goes *there*.....

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:15 (twelve years ago) link

nsfw: http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/354/

dayo, Monday, 7 May 2012 23:15 (twelve years ago) link

. . .

markers, Monday, 7 May 2012 23:17 (twelve years ago) link

OH MY WHAT THE FUCK?!

That man is so creepy. Thanks a lot, Dayo.

wolf kabob (ENBB), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:18 (twelve years ago) link

Wait I am confused by the Feeldoe. Does the lady put the bulbous part in her vag and then the dick sticks out?

wolf kabob (ENBB), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:22 (twelve years ago) link

the question that had to be asked

markers, Monday, 7 May 2012 23:24 (twelve years ago) link

That's what E is here for :)

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:27 (twelve years ago) link

E if you thought that was weird, you should watch the sequel http://www.xtube.com/watch.php?v=QTGMR-G744-

dayo, Monday, 7 May 2012 23:28 (twelve years ago) link

I mean, I guess that is how it must work but in thinking about it I can see how it might be "difficult to keep on (in?) for the person who's "wearing" them" as someone up thread said at least if things really got, you know, going.

wolf kabob (ENBB), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:29 (twelve years ago) link

Invalid+Video+ID

Also I am totally O_O at the idea of a power sander sex toy. The MW is almost too powerful. I can't even imagine what a vibe fashioned out of a power sander would like. That's pretty horrifying tbh.

wolf kabob (ENBB), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:31 (twelve years ago) link

> Wait I am confused by the Feeldoe. Does the lady put the bulbous part in her vag and then the dick sticks out?

Yes, although the angle looks all wrong to me. According to their website, about 80% are purchased by heterosexual couples. Now I'm really confused.

A former roommate (female) saw me using my orbital sander to smooth a drywall joint and had to "try" it herself. She had never seen one, and I had never heard of one being used for anything other than sanding until then. Although an orbital car polisher used to wax and shine your car is essentially the same tool with a soft terry cloth cover instead of sandpaper - I think the tool manufacturers realized they can sell two tools instead of one by selling the latter in auto-parts stores instead of hardware stores. Evidently there's a third potential sales channel they haven't yet discovered....

xp - no way i'd put my junk in that thing. Scary.

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:43 (twelve years ago) link

E you have to add the hypen at the end

dayo, Monday, 7 May 2012 23:44 (twelve years ago) link

Orbital power sanders BTW don't move very much - although powerful, the power goes towards torque (so it won't slow down if lots of pressure is applied), not movement. It only vibrates about 1/8" in any direction.

Lee593 (Lee626), Monday, 7 May 2012 23:47 (twelve years ago) link

now we know who is ordering that 50 gallon barrel of lube off amazon, I guess

so my tmi story is this.

When I was a younger mh (early 20s) I used to have a number of (pitchers of) beers with an ex and we'd go back to her place and it'd be cool and she would fall asleep. During the act. My dignity was slightly bruised by this and I inquired what was up and she said that it was -- and I quote -- "So relaxing". I get that in a letter-off-tension way, but during the actual act idk if it's the sort of relaxing you want to fall asleep to. After some questioning, I found out she used to fall asleep with her vibrator stuck against her, sometimes until the batteries died. After that, I felt perfectly adequate because I really don't know how she could have had any feeling left at all.

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:01 (twelve years ago) link

narcosexy

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:06 (twelve years ago) link

Can we...not...refer to sex toy use as making people unfeeling or whatever? It's kind of a played out nasty little slur about women, so demanding, so impossible for humans to satisfy, they've done it to themselves so why even try anymore, etc. Not that that's you, mh, it just makes me feel kind of gross and sad.

Also I have fallen asleep during oral many many years ago. It *was* relaxing!

an ex of mine used to fall asleep during oral too, i never knew what to make of it but eventually i just started to use it strategically, before a match was gonna be on tv or w/e

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:12 (twelve years ago) link

lollll

the aower of aussy (electricsound), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:20 (twelve years ago) link

I had no idea that was a stereotype or slur!

as an apology I will admit to some uncomfortable chafing in the past

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:20 (twelve years ago) link

btw this wasn't a "why try' thing, the girl was still very into sex when she wasn't two pitchers into the evening

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:21 (twelve years ago) link

ime women who are anorgasmic or unable to really get into penetrative m/f intercourse are pretty normal, it's just one of the many ways that we all are different and sometimes special

fwiw dudes who can't get off get the third degree and weird stereotypes just as much.

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:23 (twelve years ago) link

popular with the baseball team, was she?

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:23 (twelve years ago) link

lol

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:25 (twelve years ago) link

falling asleep during cunnilingus wouldn't be so common if thighs were not so soft and pillowy

wait, I think I've misunderstood

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:28 (twelve years ago) link

easy to be misunderstood when you're tonguethighed i spose

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:34 (twelve years ago) link

blast you dmac, and your damned cleverness

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:35 (twelve years ago) link

i put my best years into ilx throwaway tmi puns, if my english teacher could see me now he'd bawl crying.

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:38 (twelve years ago) link

if the thread's any indication the rest of us are balling crying

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:40 (twelve years ago) link

balling, crying, sleeping- p much my routine

underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:43 (twelve years ago) link

yes, heterosexual couples use strap ons too you realize

some dudes like it up the butt. no big thing.

homosexual II, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:45 (twelve years ago) link

the idea is that the pc muscles hold in the bulb end of the feeldoe. you probably have to have pretty strong muscles. i havent used mine yet. so we'll see.

homosexual II, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:46 (twelve years ago) link

sex positivity!

homosexual II, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:46 (twelve years ago) link

there's a line on the feeldoe website about how keeping the bulb in place can be a bit of a challenge but is fun. something about the whole, forgive the word, vibe of the feeldoe makes me happy. people makin stuff that'll be useful and cool to people, fuck yeah

cosi fan whitford (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:49 (twelve years ago) link

how do you feeldoe

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:49 (twelve years ago) link

heh I was trying not to ask who the intended target of the other end was but I figured

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:49 (twelve years ago) link

plz figure this out h2 and then I can get drunk and ask you how pegging etiquette works

mh, Tuesday, 8 May 2012 00:50 (twelve years ago) link


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