what's happening to our borad TMI

about now is when I thought about posting a picture of Cotton Mather but I don't think he's got proper face recognition to make the joke work

got images of sam taking some strong tokes on a blazin tampon tbh

I guess it probably depends on how heavy a girl's flow is? ime a lot of guys are ok with it, but I'm with erica on this topic.

Mine is somewhere between Niagara Falls and a firehose, but actually, my problem with it is that my vagina is too tender for a thrusting penis during my period--I always felt like I'd been sandpapered up in there afterward.

one thing i'm regretting is being one the first people to get a rolling tmi thread going; the rest of y'all get to be in the skip all messages.

there for posteriority

put a towel down, carry on, imo

words to live life by

my period is late

mine too. I better not be pregnant; I had a very indulgent month.

9 months growing future ilxors

We have a lot of fun over at I Love People-Making, I promise!

People-Making does seem like a lot of fun! Initially at least.

i guess that is too cynical to be a board description, right. unless it's a kinda louis ck forum.

I want to make people. But preferably after I quit smoking!

I washed my favorite bra (after like 5 days of use) by wearing it in the shower. Seems fine today!

see that's the kind of quality update i had in mind, tho it's maybe a little mild. KIU laurel imo

i didn't wash my stretchy shorts after cycling to brighton in them. did not seem fine the next day.

yeah if i had time i'd change halfway through each match/run but imma try this shower thing and see if i can maintain a gf

Basically that update belongs on dirtbag style but I'd have had to search for it, and the bits about underwear and showering does make it a bit TMI so I thought what the hell.

I would imagine that washing it while wearing it is probably good for - helps keep its shape!

isn't that wearing it til it dries? levi's ad style

wash and wear shrink to fit bras... hmm, probably not an untapped market

Nah I didn't sleep in it. Dried it on a drying rack like a normal person.

As opposed to my drying rack, which...never mind.

lol

I am not looking forward to the dry winter season as I got the worst dry skin last year. On my junk. That would not heal.

O_O

this thread is great

http://i.imgur.com/e2kKN.jpg

Could it have been a yeast infection?

rub some coconut oil on it

coconut oil is a miracle cure-all

almost

9 months growing future ilxors

"he has his father's gifs"

that's kind of a catch-22. "I'll just rub this oil on my... oh boy, that isn't helping"

just talk to markers while you do it, should keep anything from arising.

. . .

markers, I may need yr phone number should this need occur this year

;)

it's 911

that's good. it's tricky to dial more than three digits with all this coconut oil on my fingers

wtf, get someone else to rub coconut oil in it, smh

was wrested from my slumber last night by an excruciating bout of proctalgia fugax. pacing the floor like a sick dog, trying to stretch it out. took some benedryl in the hope it would simply render me unconscious and duumb to the pain. things eventually settled down while drinking a glass of milk and I went back t8o bed. this used to be rare, but now occurs about once every two months.

Oh shit, that's what that is?

It is recurrent and there is also no known cure.

Oh.

:(

That little discovery combined with a theory from my doctor that my recurrent choking might be cricopharyngeal spasm- which is apparently treated by JABBING A NEEDLE FULL OF BOTOX INTO THE NECK JESUS CHRIST- makes me feel like my body is completely falling apart.

have u tried 'poppers'

Since they're the kind of drugs you get from other people, as opposed to the kind you get prescribed because you're paralyzed with anxiety at the thought of interacting with other people, no. Every so often I think about trying pot for the crushing social phobia, realize I have no idea how to get it or really what to do with it once I have it, and go back to my Ativan and agoraphobic weekends and malfunctioning esophagus.

Yeah, as my display name shows I was hilariously looking at the poppers article on wikipedia. Apparently an effect is the relaxation of the rectal muscles. um, side note.

good luck 2 ur anus

Last night I dreamt that I took two enormous craps that were actually songs from Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon. One was angular and resembled both a music note and a saxophone: this one was "Money". The other was shaped like a huge, overstuffed burrito: this was "Us and Them". I had the damnedest time flushing them.

Horrifying!

The worst gas I ever had was a post-suckling pig food poisoning experience. My Filipino in-laws took me out for my birthday. “Eat the cheek!” they said, and I ate the cheek. “Eat the nozzle!” they said, and I thought “…nozzle?” and I dutifully ate bites of the snout.

I got food poisoning, as one does from eating undercooked pig’s head. I would feel fine, until I ate a meal, at which point I would feel woozy and pass out cold for a two hour nap.

While I was not napping, it wasn’t that I was gassy so much as my anus felt like it was continuously wafting a constant stream of hellgas. I likened the sensation to being a “walking upside-down tar pit”

Have been severely constipated all day. Laxative didn't merely soften things, it created cocoa butter

The evening is a loss

bad post about nothing

tell us about your truly enormous toilet-clogging shits or gtfo

I would simply drink so many electrolytes I’d spend the rest of the workday on the toilet and not post about it. Many such times.

we need a new borad where we’re allowed to post stupid shit in the hopes of getting viciously roasted/bullied imo

if you post there too much or solely we know you’re bad, though

i have a cologuard kit that has long awaited a donation

but i'm holding out for the right time

well! just had my first visit from the kidney stone fairy and i gotta say, fuck that very much indeed. this 2.5mm mofo had me crumpling to the emergency room floor loudly sobbing and cursing (and apologizing, when able) while the poor nurse was trying to triage me, and it had me continuing to writhe and expel unconscionable noises until they dilaudided my ass.

but anyway yeah the good stuff: i'm home now with orders to piss thru a strainer (retired silicon mesh cheesecloth thing), which, since i'm on my period, means getting intimately reacquainted with my endometrial lining. good times, good times. i remember once i sneezed in the bath and a chunk the size of a raspberry shot out. fingers crossed i get to capture his brother this time!

Oof! One of the first things they taught us during renal block in medschool is that the pain scale goes from 1 to kidney-stones. Sorry Cat! Know whatever healthcare worker you had understands thats as bad as it gets and you get an immediate pass for whatever you may scream in that situation. Stay well!!!!

Loool the cough/sneeze-firing of menstrual chunks is real talk, cat 🤝

The chunks get chunkier in perimenopause..