Sex Droughts

xp

on a serious note, if that might be a concern then i don't advise all -out surprise ball-grabbing as a move.

'on a serious note' followed by that

the gist of my advice is, if you don't feel comfortable verbalizing your boneyard wishes, then perhaps try a physical demonstration -- initiate playful foreplay

if he has his arm around your shoulder, take his hand and place firmly on boob

The perfect cue.

IMO if you are watching TV together with your head on his lap, that is the perfect time to do a covert BJ operation. Oldest move in the book.

does covert mean you do it so he doesn't notice?

Yeah the only time that shit can be covert is if your guy is asleep and you wake him up that way. Otherwise, he's aware of what's going on down there at all times and in every situation.

i reckon the answer is simply 'be naked more often'

I just call all sex initiation "covert operations" and I didn't even realize that made no sense until now.

I'm generally more of a talker than a covert-ops person, so while the boob-grab and thigh-stroke maneuvers are good ones, I'd go with a talk -- just not a talk that has to result in sex right then and there.

"Mr. Veg, I love you like nobody's business, but I'm not ready to spend the rest of my days celibate. Let's figure something out. I've got a case of hot pants."

covert operations = prove as not erotic

"Mr. Veg, I love you like nobody's business, but I'm not ready to spend the rest of my days celibate. Let's figure something out. I've got a case of hot pants."

If Mr. Veg is cool, which I assume he is, using this line verbatim should work.

(wonders if it would be weird to quote WmC when initiating Operation: Boneyard)

You guys are awesome. Thank you so much for the advice & lols, I feel a thousand times better about this now.

Hugs!!

xp *takes a bow*

It defuses tension with humor, it recruits Mr. Veg to the common cause instead of making the situation adversarial. "With you and me solving this thing together, our genitals are not going to know what hit them!"

oh and Johnny, Mr Veg is v v cool :)

I may find a way to cue up some James Brown with the hot pants line...

if you're feeling crafty, you could always make him a handmade invitation to the boneyard

Lololol

or you could repurpose one of any number of Hallmark cards with pictures of dogs on them

http://www.soulstrut.com/images/smileys/dead.gif

wmc otm

http://www.picturehistory.com/images/products/0/0/4/prod_402.jpg
"You are invited to my vagina!"

crut!!!

dying; on way to boneyard

lj - you clearly are not or were ever goth

haha omg crut!

Table for two, please

http://i878.photobucket.com/albums/ab342/MetromixCLE/Boneyard%20Westlake/IMG_2108.jpg

lol

Sadly, it looks empty.

important to remember that the boneyard is open for lunch 7 days a week

Ask about our sliders!

I'm off my game tonight. Normally, I'd be able to come up with all kinds of restaurant/sex euphemisms.

'by all means complain to the chef, he's a sous'

'thighs with that?'

idgi

i can't help it, any time i'm watching a movie and my girl pulls that move i slap them, gather my shawl around my shoulders, and storm out of the room. i mean really, what happened to treating a guy like a gentleman

― Goths in Home & Away in my lifetime (darraghmac), Friday, November 19, 2010 12:39 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

i seriously spent a good 10 seconds trying to figure out what 'them' was being slapped

like, is self-ball-slapping some next level dimmesdale type of or

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2129/1636214047_bf2c507777.jpg

slap tremendo balls ridically

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZP4Ugev82I

brilliant

odd wedding dj slap them all

lolling at "next level dimmesdale type of"

Johnny and WmC otm, good luck Veg!

I have a small suspicion that part of the drought also has to do with Mr Veg's sex drive waning.

And if this is the case, go see the doctor about it. There may be all kinds of physical reasons for a waning sex drive, some of which may have other effects outside the bedroom.

Oh, and wouldn't a boneyard be something that you'd need a cockfarmer to take care of?

my wife has zero sex drive. i think thats the case with most women who have given birth, or am i being naive. I don't think we've had penetration in a few months.

Breast feeding can put a damper on sex drive, in the way that the pill can. After that, though, I think things return to normal typically (did for us).

she gave birth two years ago! she says she doesn't feel attractive because she hasn't lost the baby weight. I tell her she still attractive (which she is, very much so). Problem isn't really the lack of sex, im not bothered by it its the lack of initiation. she never ever initiates.

man lack of initiation is a whole different thread I think

Keep hearing this thread title to the tune of "Sex Weed" in my head.