I spoke with Zen Clown last night

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Zen said to tell everyone here that he misses each and every one of you every day.

He is still under the weather but he sounded much better than the last time we spoke.

― Ðµdë §téè£, Saturday, 12 March 2005 05:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Give Marty my best wishes, Herr Steel.

― Michael White (Hereward), Saturday, 12 March 2005 07:24 (nineteen years ago) link

Zen was able to speak? It must have been early in the day. I grow morose and incommunicado after 5pm.

― Aimless (Aimless), Saturday, 12 March 2005 18:37 (nineteen years ago) link

Michael,

Marty also said that he hopes that the rash on your tongue has cleared up by now..... whatever that means.

Aimless,

He said that he misses you most of all. But come to think of it .... he made that statement during the part of the conversation while we were discussing the joy that he derives from standing naked on his front porch while urinating on photos of people he knows...... I don't know for sure what he meant by that either.

He did say that he would welcome phone calls from any of the regulars here.

― Ðµdë §téè£, Sunday, 13 March 2005 17:57 (nineteen years ago) link

I like it when Zen misses me. When he hits me is much worse.

― Aimless (Aimless), Sunday, 13 March 2005 21:02 (nineteen years ago) link

When he hits on you it's worst of all. With the crying and the gesticulating and the redrawing of national boundaries according to strict division of mineral deposits etc.

― Matt (Matt), Monday, 14 March 2005 17:38 (nineteen years ago) link

Either ore...

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 16:06 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm tempted to revive the pun amnesty thread for that post alone.

― Matt (Matt), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 16:33 (nineteen years ago) link

I DO hope Zen returns to us. but i wonder how he will feel when he finds out Mindless Prattle is gone.

― ((Censored)) ((Censored)), Friday, 18 March 2005 01:53 (nineteen years ago) link

He will clutch at his chest, turn pale, make inarticulate, whispery noises of pain, then sink to his knees and gurgle, before pitching over onto his face. However, you shouldn't worry. He's always like that. It's the absinthe, Pernod and Lite beer cocktails he drinks.

― Aimless (Aimless), Friday, 18 March 2005 05:47 (nineteen years ago) link

you mean this wasn't a charity fundraising swindle??

or should i say MERELY a charity fundraising swindle.

anyway, hope the parts fit. oil his joints twice a day and keep him out of the rain. god knows when that dorothy girl will be back.

― hurley (hurley), Tuesday, 22 March 2005 19:24 (nineteen years ago) link

I spoke with Zen not too long ago, he seemed saddened at the fact that it was gone, but happy to know we all made it out alive.

― ((Censored)) ((Censored)), Monday, 4 April 2005 03:46 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh hell. I'm back. I have about as much willpower as a tennis ball.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 4 April 2005 04:02 (nineteen years ago) link

i was going to post a thread nut i decided not to spoil the surprise.

― ((Censored)) ((Censored)), Monday, 4 April 2005 05:33 (nineteen years ago) link

I always knew Zen was mixed up in some kind of racket.

― M. White (Miguelito), Monday, 4 April 2005 15:02 (nineteen years ago) link

It's Michael Foot's fault.

― A / F#m / Bm / D (Lynskey), Monday, 4 April 2005 15:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Porl? Show yourself, sir. This board is a lesser thing without you.

If you don't come back to us, I'll complain to Cellest. I'm not kidding, I really will. You'll be in trouble. I think Cell fancies me. Seems she has a penchent for old ugly yanks. Young handsome Brits are a dime a dozen.

Obviously, I hate all of you young fuckers...especially Matt.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 4 April 2005 19:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Yes, Zen we all hate you as well. and we all hate eachother. this board is a festering wound full of hatred. or at least thats how it has been since Mindless Prattle went away.

― ((Censored)) ((Censored)), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 03:56 (nineteen years ago) link

Not just a festering wound full of hatred, but a pustulent sore oozing with scorn and sarcasm, a melon-sized buboe of seething antagonism, a reeking mire of anger and spite, and a chaotic melee of old-fashioned shite-flinging. I say, does anyone have any Grey Poupon?

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 04:57 (nineteen years ago) link

Well that really cuts the mustard, I must say.

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 08:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Zen:

Your hatred ringeth clearer than Hackney Bells, and gives me much succour, uplift and seperation.

But stop camping outside my old house, I don't even live there any more.

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 13:21 (nineteen years ago) link

There was once a bra that claimed to do what Zen's anger does to Matt - lift and seperate.

― MSW, Wednesday, 6 April 2005 14:44 (nineteen years ago) link

That reminds me. I lent Matt one of my favorite bras. It was on my girlfriend and he has never returned it. Matt? Dammit! I want my bra back. If you return her, without the bra, or if she's pregnant, I will demand restitution! It was a gift from Dude Steel. I only kept it on the girl so it wouldn't lose it's shape. It's a sentimental thing.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 16:08 (nineteen years ago) link

I will demand restitution!

Don't you mean prostitution?

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 21:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Absolution

― A / F#m / Bm / D (Lynskey), Wednesday, 6 April 2005 22:39 (nineteen years ago) link

Destitution

― C J (C J), Thursday, 7 April 2005 05:35 (nineteen years ago) link

Ba Da BING!

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Thursday, 7 April 2005 09:13 (nineteen years ago) link

ten years pass...

i awoke today in ormskirk. did i miss anything?

― hurley, Thursday, 11 June 2015 01:15 (eight years ago) link

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