L@@K! Photos from Real Estate Listings (see remarks)

You guys spotted the wipe-clean orgy room, but you missed the sex swing.

https://photos.zillowstatic.com/fp/4e9cf5ecc3f132a6bbfa9598872d80f5-uncropped_scaled_within_1536_1152.webp

I love conversation pits too, but it could be deeper, for deeper conversations.

This isn't really a house house, more like an AirB&B type deal.

But that said, WHY WOULD YOU HANG THAT PHOTOGRAPH inside one of the bedrooms?

https://i.imgur.com/qK8xpZR.png

what am i looking at?

https://i.imgur.com/SH60Tw5.jpg

lol tyvm

ok that's funny i couldn't see the photo, i had wanted to post a series of pictures "for laffs" and that was one of them! another was the "putin kissed boy 'like a kitten'" photo

Never forget.

this twitter account reminded me of this thread

https://twitter.com/SellingAMirror

House I grew up in had a conversation pit. I liked how it looked, along with the inference that social interaction is crucial enough to warrant a dedicated room in a small house. But I couldn't sit in there without worrying that someone from the raised area surrounding it would step back and accidentally fall in. The top of the couch seatbacks weren't much higher than the floor, and if you put a railing or kneewall up to prevent inward falls it spoils the effect.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1777-Calle-Poniente-Santa-Barbara-CA-93101/15892544_zpid/?mmlb=g,16

Starts off as just annoyingly "whimsical" but proceeds to wtf around photo 12/13

i like this! i mean i'm not capable of making my house like this but i'd live here.

oh wow. I've often wondered what I'd find on some of those roads that dead end at Elings, and this does not disappoint. looks like jimmy j art extruded into 3D space.

Harbl how could you even be in that bathroom? I would have a seizure I think.

it's really beautiful tile work... craftsmanship (and lots of beautiful tile for that matter) feels wasted on the whimsy of what they're going for

The bathroom is like being in an aquarium with fish and sea otters.

???

it is like that only because the sea otters would die in an aquarium, and this sight could make one vomit.

an old ass bungalow for 1 mil, only in california

i prefer an old ass bungalow to the not-as-old-ass textured stucco exterior of most california homes

my house is only about 40 sq ft larger and was......let's say far less expensive than this

this is santa barbara. the land is worth 1m.

Do you like purple?
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/79801824

Or maybe hot pink is your thing?
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/115580855

attempting the images...

https://i.imgur.com/QmsZUIQ.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/QLV1wBj.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/fIfEPtu.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/1iTz8mv.jpg

"decor may need some updating"

I dunno. Looking at those last two made my stomach ache go away.

Would anyone like to join me while I use the restroom pic.twitter.com/mGjQHOkvj3

— Zillow Gone Wild 🏡 (@zillowgonewild) January 12, 2022

- "Is there anything wrong?"

- "No, I just... When the ad said 3 Baths, I assumed they were all in different rooms."

"Hey sis, can you ask mom to pass down another square please?"

Looks like it takes up a substantial portion of the house, too!

eh, it was probably an infant daycare. our kids go to a regular house where the bathroom has like six toilets.

That's not a regular house.

Surprised Goldilocks ever left that place.

my working theory was that there were three kids and nobody used the bathroom at the same time, but the parents wanted them each to have a separate "station" due to some misguided hygienic obsession.

My maternal great grandmother toilet trained her kids by tying them to a toilet whether they needed to poop or not

awkward walking around for a year or two tied to a toilet, but i bet that worked.

yeah i think DC is right. they don't poop together! this is so their bottoms don't have to touch the same toilet someone else's bottom has touched!!!

Oldest house on Hawthorne Ave. Built by Fowle family and used at one point as a girl scout camp.

That's it for me! Goodnight everyone!

This one gives me bad vibes and I can't exactly put my finger on why
https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/75-Southgate-Ave-Hastings-On-Hudson-NY-10706/33022662_zpid/?

probably because it costs $800k and absolutely sucks?

lol, yeah that might be it

honestly it's a pretty wild ass asking price. 5,000 sf lot, clearly needs complete renovation, oil heat, who knows what fucked up shit lurks beneath the surface. I know the market is hot but have a hard time believing it's that hot rn.

Having a sink in your carpeted primary bedroom is a bad vibe.

House + close to NYC = $$$

Yeah, it's 20% above appraised value which is aggressive but it's an aggressive seller's market. It's a good school district on a direct train to NYC.

That house would cost at least twice that in California.

I think it's priced high even for the market. I would think more like $650,000-700k, and that's if there isn't some kind of lurking disaster under the surface.

For $50k more you can get this pretty sweet mid-century modern. Admittedly smaller but much bigger lot.
https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/21-Crossbar-Rd-Hastings-On-Hudson-NY-10706/33023190_zpid/

two similarly-situated properties for sale down the street from me, 7000 and 4000 sq ft lots for 325k and 230k. they are listed as lot/land but were recently occupied, definitely worth more to someone who wants to build multi-family homes on them. both are well over their tax-assessed value but that's not unusual.

Unless youre the only person with a big lot in the neighborhood, a big lot is just a sign you live in an unwalalkable bit of the suburbs tbh

10k sf is a nice happy medium, enough to have a yard but your neighbors are actually neighbors.