changing up yr style and/or new look 4 u in 2012

i guess they're like soft cup bras? basically stretch bras?

for natural 70s boob

what is natural 70s boob?

Not pointy like 50s boobs or high and tight like contemporary boobs.

Just kind of hanging out, being cool and not worrying too much boob. Or maybe disco boob.

lol yes

it's all of those, I think

a natural boob that moves

these are all such great phrases

I read in a snooty book once that the pleasure of truly great bras is that they make the breasts look SMALLER, thereby making the wearer more demure on the outside but revealing a more generous physique to the intimate acquaintance. Snooty book might be full of shit, I haven't decided.

Well I guess surprise big boobs like that are better than finding out someone was wearing a padded gel number and is much smaller in reality. Idk though, it probably is full of shit.

Snooty book is full of shit even if just for the reason that for some folks, making our boobs look smaller would still result in giant looking boobs. Also subtext of stifling sexuality. It's like keeping your hair covered so you can surprise your man with its exotic beauty when you finally take off your bonnet.

But I cam here to post this important piece of information: http://inkdot.tumblr.com/post/7243925631/no-shit

Like if I could somehow manage to squash my boobs into a bra two cups smaller, I would still have 38E cups boobs.

It kind of ties in with the whole "lose 10% of your body weight to be healthy!" trope. 10% less of me would still be a Whole Lotta Jenny. And if I weighed 10% less and went to a doc, that doc would tell me "lose 10% of your body weight to be healthy!"

Basically the message is that whatever you are, it's not right, and there's no way to get to a place where it will be right, because "right" is always one cup smaller or 10% less.

Yeah that's the icky subtext, the stifling/concealment thing and the withholding-from-self-to-give-to-partner thing.

Also that small boobs are demure, so letting your tig ole bitties out into the world makes you a slut. Which is a pretty common narrative (see networks objecting to Lane Bryant lingerie commercial w/ plus size model, networks being just fine with that hideous Victoria's Secret runway model special).

I hear a lot of criticisms of women with big tits out in the real world - specifically from other women. "Oh my god, look at her jugs. Would she put those away?" It makes me sad. Of course dudes love em. But that's beside the point.

ALL BODIES ARE BEAUTIFUL
I LOVE THIS BODY ACCEPTANCE ERA

<3

Yeah, I self-police way too much on that stuff b/c of first my mother's voice in my head for so many years, and then the fact that my boss criticizes me (and anyone else) for having more than a bare arm showing.*

Sorry if I have been this way to ilx. :(

* The other day I went into her office and she said, abruptly, "This is good, I like this outfit. I didn't like what you wore yesterday AT ALL." (Voice curling into a whipcrack on last two words.) Because I wore a miniskirt with leggings underneath and a long sweater. In 2012 I would like to turn over a new leaf of pissing her off more often.

A lot of people a lot, lot thinner than myself: "I wish I could pull that off" re: my fashion/style/etc

It, too, makes me sad. People should wear what they want. Even if they have big boobs, small boobs, a big belly, cellulite, or their arms jiggle. Whatever. I am not perfect at this yet, either - but for years I just hid away in jeans and t-shirts and crap from Old Navy because I always had plans to lose weight and I was either on the losing track of gaining track and nothing ever fit.

That's especially poignant because you're so stylish and inspired by a look or a fabric or a color and just running with it, and obviously enjoying it. I'm glad you decided to change that.

I just yelled at my family for policing a family friend's weight at the dinner table (not in that person's presence). Made me very angry and sad. How did they get so thoughtless and gross?? They are not unkind or gross people (okay my youngest brother sort of is) but they think this is acceptable behavior even toward someone they like/care about.

I want to rep harder for body acceptance in 2012.

One of my very good friends is about 6 years older than me, and kinda old school in her body image... aka she was in her early 20's when heroin chic was in in the 90's, and was constantly berated by her mother for her weight (and she was 120 pounds as a young adult). She's about 5'6", weighs 150 pounds, has had two kids, and has a great figure. But she's constantly asking me if her ass looks big, that she has a double chin, that she "looks fat", etc, and after two years of yelling at her about this I am kinda over it... I'm flat out mean about it. I told her last time if she wanted to know what fat felt like, she would feel it... as I smothered her with my body.

She's also said several times that she wants to have a tummy tuck and a boob job.

Mandee I get why that's annoying but you also don't know what issues she's had or experiences she's gone through.

To make her that way, I mean. This stuff can be really really tough to get over. It's awesome that you're so accepting of yourself but for some people it's a life long struggle. You know?

I understand that, but for two years I've told her I find her comments offensive and she still continues.

She's admitted she has body dysmorphia but won't do anything about it, except only to make offensive comments aloud to her closest friend - who happens to outweigh her by 70 pounds. I'm just tired of trying to lift her up and make her feel better about herself.

Basically minus the having had kids thing I am probably very similar to your friend but I've battled eating disorders most of my life and am still working through a lot of these issues. There is not a day that goes by that I don't worry about my weight or feel unhappy with myself and while I'm trying to deal with that it's a very real part of who I am and who I have been for my entire adult life. It's shitty and it's awful but it's how it is. I'm just saying that while I really admire your attitude and understand that your friend can probably get really irritating your post sounded a little harsh to me.

except only to make offensive comments aloud to her closest friend - who happens to outweigh her by 70 pounds

Yeah well that's bullshit imo and pretty strange tbh.

Yeah it probably does so my apologies if it sounds harsh, but she's frustrating to me in other areas besides this so it's probably coloring my attitude... I am totally sensitive to other people having body image issues, I guess its the constant logorrea that really gets to me

Yeah, that's understandable. It's obviously an issue that hits home with me because I know I am and have been that person even though it's something I try not to do.

It's not just body image, though. I mean, more people should think more about the criticisms they give themselves outloud.

For instance, one day I was whining about my "horrible skin" aloud in front of someone who had cystic acne. She called me out on that.

Yeah, I totally agree. I've done similar before myself.

Ugh I have an awful big boob meanness story to relate, will do so when not on my ph

jenny, that tumblr post is a delight! or at least i am delighted with what i've taken away from it, which is: let's totally get our clothes tailored and feel fantastic.

Also: let's not feel bad when clothes don't fit us the way it fits ppl on TV/magazines.

i subscribe to the same theory as Mandee -- gonna wear what I want when I want because I want to. It could be any number of things, but I'm not going to sit around thinking that my boobs are too small for that dress. I'm just gonna wear the dress.

that's why i wanted to talk about style, not bodies!

so the mean-boob story i have:

my husb works in kind of a shitty environment, with a lot of shitty people. anyway, a woman started there a while ago, middle-aged, fairly conservative in manner and dress... but she had "clearly" had a boob job. not long after she started there, during a conversation with ytth, she mentioned that she had had breast cancer and was in remission. however, since the conversation was just between the two of them, and she hadn't expressly told him it was ok to tell other people, he kept it to himself. but ytth had to listen to a bunch of his co-workers - both male and female - constantly refer to this woman's "boob job" derogatorily, since he didn't feel comfortable saying anything (these aren't the kind of ppl you can say "hey it's not cool the way you're acting, cut it out"). this went on a for a few months, till finally, at their xmas function, one guy started referring to her as "torpedo tits" and she was only at the other end of the table. ytth, getting more and more uncomfortable, concerned that she would overhear this stupid drunk asshole, finally just told him: "she had breast cancer, ok?". apparently, this guy's face just completely fell - his aunt or someone had died from breast cancer, and he was bummed out the rest of the night.

moral of the story: it's none of your goddamn business what someone has or has not done to their boobs, or why, and you should maybe think for a second before you speak, because how would feel overhearing someone talk about the boobs of your sister, or your mother or your daughter??

i love the direction this thread has gone! awesome posting ITT.

i love body acceptance 2012.

<3<3<3

btw I thought a bralet was like a bra with a bit underneath, like a hybrid between bra and those smocked crop top things ppl wore in the 90s.

Thread has gone from great to greater!

haha i def know some girls that at least look like they buy all their clothes from totokaelo its a good look imo

lol this is my gf. Or would be if she was richer.

My style resolutions are to cut my hair more frequently, wear more slacks and fewer jeans, more shoes and fewer sneakers, and tuck my shirt in more often. Also I am going to buy a suit

those are basically my style resolutions as well, really

also 'spend less time reading fantasy novels from amazon and more time going to poetry readings at the independent bookshop'

I have a style change addendum, per the thing I posted and c sharp's comment:

~ find a tailor I like.
~ alternatively, step up my sewing game, but being realistic, finding a tailor is more likely.

That article about the tailored clothes was fascinating. The only thing I've ever had tailored are formal dresses. Thinking I need to find one I like too and start using him/her on the reg.

My style prediction for 2012: I will continue to wear lots of brown, and my ancient clothes will continue to fall apart.

man remember in the 80s/90s when a red head wearing pink or red was just NOT DONE. How freakin ridiculous.

This year i want to learn to sew collars, peter pan or pointy, to add to dresses or plain not collared shirts. also cuffs if shirt or dress is long sleeved. If anyone knows of a good collar pattern PLease l;et me now <3

i know its kind of 90s but i really enjoy a collar.

Also this year i plan to buy well made classic pieces that will last years rather that some shitty cardigan from target that has holes in it within month.

Actually what id really like to do is learn to make patterns and sew my own clothes because i can never find anything off the rack that exactly how i want it.

emil.y i have no idea how to wear brown! i have brown clothes but cant work them into anything. im mostly a black/purple/white/pink/blue person because of this :(

i wore a replica of Stacey Dash's 'Clueless' collared red dress to my brother's wedding in 96. Wasn't working at all on my me. material for the dress was some kid of weird silky polyester deal. very wrong. and the red was nowhere as deep. more an orange red. ugh.

http://vintageclothesdesignerdrugs.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/clueless.jpg

my ancient clothes will continue to fall apart.
this is happening to me too and i'm just not even sure what to do about it
do i really have to buy *new* sweaters? what?

yesterday i got fed up with a hideously oversized tshirt that i loooove otherwise, so i cut about 4 in off the bottom (leaving it still below my hips, mind) cut off the ribbed neck, and trimmed the sleeves and WOW does it look better! it looks like a girl's shirt now and i can wear it with pride.

totokaelo is having a sale, which means $600 sweatshirts marked down to $400, still can't afford anything.