Search and Destroy: Mariah Carey

Message Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed
You asked, you shall receive - is Mariah a worthless piece of crap, worthy of bringing before the Geneva Crts for crimes against humanity, or should we move north and hang Celine DIon?

Geoff, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Making dogs' heads explode with her shrill voice -- GUILTY! Casting herself as a 'hip hop diva/prostitute' -- GUILTY! Behaving like a spoiled child and making a genuine ass of herelf -- GUILTY.

alex in nyc, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Completely worthless, but a marketing triumph. Name another female pop star who is less fun than this one. Zero personality. The only thing she has going is that she's soon going to have more number ones than the Beatles or Elvis.

Mark, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Can I just ask why people do this to me? I can say, NOT IN ANY WAY ASKING FOR A THREAD TO BE STARTED AS I'D DO IT MYSELF, "Jeez, it's getting to the point where we'll have a That Dog: Classic Or Dud!" and someone will virtually immediately post "That Dog: Classic Or Dud?" Does this work with bands I actually like? Let's try it: "Jeez, it's nearly to the point where we'll have a Search And Destroy: Manic Street Preachers!" and "I really hope there's never, ever a Spiritualized: Classic Or Dud? thread". It just makes me laugh a bit because it's every single time I've done it, and then a few of the FTers blame me :)

Anyhow, if we must: Search: Fantasy Destroy: Mariah Carey.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Dear lord. I had to listen to that butchering of "Without You" the other day (that was her, wasn't it?). I shall pretend the question was not asked.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

That's because Mariah Carey is way funnier than Spiritualized ! So is That Dog :).

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I liked the one where she was captured by gangsters and spent the video changing outfits and escaping from an island...so search that video! Destroy...her ability to emit a high frequency squeal...I think she could KO the Fantastic Four with that!

james e l, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

That Dog are funny because they're called That Dog. What kind of godawful name is that? It's nearly as bad as The The or The Band or P. Diddy.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

There's a new band called "the Music" I bet they stink.

james e l, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Search: "Vision Of Love". Call me out of it, but this really is her best single. Best song, best use of her voice, best emotional impact... I get chills just thinking about it.

Destroy: "Dream Lover". Oh, look. Everything detestable about Mariah in one handy package. How convenient.

Dan Perry, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I'm just going to talk about That Dog because thinking about Mariah makes me feel queasy. I only have known of 2 people, ever, who have liked them. One was this really weird girl who would talk about stalking Graham from Blur, and the other one Cannot Be Named. Enough said...

Nicole, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Why would you stalk Graham when Alex is there? Jeez.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I think I have heard one or two of her records, and found them pretty unenjoyable. Don't know this stuff too well, though.

the pinefox, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I used to like That Dog. I can see them being resurrected in 2025 as a hip cult item, like Shuggie Otis or Lee Hazelwood or something, as a look-how-weird-the-mid-90s were kind of thing.

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Agreed, Alex always looked way better than Graham. I don't like Graham at all. But who are That Dog anyway?

the pinefox, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Search: Heartbreaker Videos (both), Greatest Hits, early "look" Destroy: Music Box. Midperiod stupid down-home look.

Sterling Clover, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

She had a downhome look ?!?

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i think sterling speaks of the look in the "dream lover" video in which mariah sports a t-shirt, tied in the fashion of midwestern gals, and cut-off jean shorts.

like dan, i'd go with "vision of love" as my search pick. her vocalizing is quite fine on it, i must say, and even though it's in 12/8, it's still a good song. though i wonder if i liked it if it had been done by "mariah carey," if you get me. probably not because the mariah of today, with her millions of dollars, boy toys, and hoopties, has long forgotten what it was like to sing something like she meant it.

fred solinger, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Search: the Tom Tom club sample on "Fantasy", also "Vision Of Love" is passable.

Destroy: Her boobs. You definitely don't need to SEARCH for those.

EdwardO, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I'm surprised by how few of her hits I can hum (despite ample exposure to all). This suggests melodies are generally weak. Ergo, the mega- multi-platinum sales mystify me - how's that done without catchy tunes? (Just marketing?) All the videos (from "Honey" onwards) after leaving Mottola, straightening her hair, hitching her skirt up, getting a boobjob, and growing a booty, are quite spectacular: softcore porn; no complaints.

AP, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

When I answered this yesterday I was confused. I thought that Mariah Carey was Celine Dion. Today I remembered what Mariah Carey looked like. It's true, she is gorgeous: or she was on this LP I saw with her in a Santa suit. Still don't think I've heard her records, though.

the pinefox, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Are you sure it wasn't Burl Ives in that Santa suit?

Nicole, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

four months pass...
I met Mariah back stage one day and fucked her in her ass. She absolutely loved it and asked me to do it to her again after the show. She really does have a small, skinny ass and I wish she would clean it more often.

dave swade, Wednesday, 5 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Now, that's a post.

Ally, Wednesday, 5 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

five months pass...
mariah....search: her dignity, you won't find it. destroy: all her personal records so humankind can say she never existed.

was that very harsh?

That Dog; haven't they ceased to exist? don't stalk alex, he's dangerous.

xx

Fear, Sunday, 17 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I have to thank you for resurrecting this thread if only because I missed the dirty one before.

Dan Perry, Sunday, 17 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

one year passes...
Yes. Mariah Carey should definitely be searched and destroyed!

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 16 April 2003 11:37 (twenty-one years ago) link

....but how can you destroy something that's not alive in the first place?

She should be destroyed if only for showing those monstrosities she calls breasts off at every opportunity.... vile lollopy hanging beasts.

Remind me of my Gran's.......

russ t, Wednesday, 16 April 2003 12:27 (twenty-one years ago) link

Being physically unattractive doesn't qualify for destruction in itself. If that was the case, then Joni Mitchell would have been the first to destroy.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 16 April 2003 16:46 (twenty-one years ago) link

two years pass...
Best revive of the day.

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Wow, this is an old one.

wtf are you on about geir, joni mitchell is very attractive!!

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:44 (nineteen years ago) link

Search and Destroy: Mariah Carey

Sounds like a good idea. Tell me when you find her, and I'll help you destroy her.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:55 (nineteen years ago) link

I don't think you can actually destroy things with your penis, Geir.

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 17:02 (nineteen years ago) link

emancipation of mimi is wonderful. top 3 for me for sure.

Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 17:29 (nineteen years ago) link

With her last album, Mariah Carey has gone from awful (Adult Contemporary) to even worse (contemporary hip-hop-influenced R&B)

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:00 (nineteen years ago) link

Jams OTM! & so is Geir, in his "special" way.

David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:03 (nineteen years ago) link

That bonus track is KILLER.

Lethal Dizzle (djdee2005), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 23:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Is anything on it as good as her awesome "Funkin 4 Jamaica" "cover" collab-o with Mystikal?

The first single didn't do much for me.

"With her last album, Mariah Carey has gone from awful (Adult Contemporary) to even worse (contemporary hip-hop-influenced R&B)"

Wasn't this true from Butterfly onwards though? I remember "Honey" being the decisive step towards "hip-hop-influenced R&B".

Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 01:15 (nineteen years ago) link

Yeah, & I'm not that familiar w/ those albums post-"Honey", but she usually sticks at least one shitass weepy ballad in the mix. Ain't none of that here - well, balladry, yeah (I think - haven't listened in a while), but the GOOD type.

David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 02:01 (nineteen years ago) link

"Honey" didn't have the same kind of über-annoying staccato beat that her current stuff does. Plus the style still left room for a proper melody. I consider "Money" among her more decent moments.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 09:26 (nineteen years ago) link

obv search 'all i want for christmas is you' - it's my favourite christmas song, most years!

pete b. (pete b.), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 09:34 (nineteen years ago) link

That Dog?

Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 10:34 (nineteen years ago) link

"Search: "Vision Of Love". Call me out of it, but this really is her best single. Best song, best use of her voice, best emotional impact... I get chills just thinking about it."

Dan Perry OTM in 2001.

scott seward (scott seward), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 10:40 (nineteen years ago) link

SEARCH: the Def Club remix of "Dreamlover"

Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 11:01 (nineteen years ago) link

"stay the night" off of mimi is her greatest song yet. it's a really sad album though -- mariah isn't allowed to be mariah anymore.

Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:06 (nineteen years ago) link

The video for "Without You" is an utter atrocity - AN UTTER ATROCITY!!! It's the way that she stomps her feet, waves her hands, her face contorted in agony (as if she was having her liver removed without the benefits of anaesthetic) in order to show us just how emotional she feels when she sings. What's almost as bad is the audience response - who holler and applaud and delight in every single vocal inflection (or whatever it is that she does.) Whenever it's on tv i can't help but watch it - even though it's the most toe-curlingly, cringe-inducing thing i've ever seen.

search: Mariah Carey
when you find her: DESTROY! DESTROY! EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!

Neil FC (Neil FC), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:14 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh please. She's great. I don't care for the ballads, too mushy mushy, but the rest is ace, including her out of control personality. You gotta a love a woman who apparently "doesn't do stairs" (-> whatever THAT means) and demands puppies so as to appear nicer.

nathalie doing a soft foot shuffle (stevie nixed), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:21 (nineteen years ago) link

Several years on, I upgrade "Vision Of Love" to mega-classic status, and remember that "Love Takes Time" wasn't half bad either. I felt sorry for her, she had dead eyes all through her mega-stardom-years...

edward o (edwardo), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:22 (nineteen years ago) link

R&B in general needs to get over this "ballad" thing - bless DC (NOT BEYONCE) & their producers for finding a way to do slow-burnin' songs that don't get stuck in the mud.

&, yeah, to piggyback SS's endorsement of Pope Dang, "Vision of Love" makes her first album.

David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:25 (nineteen years ago) link

She is, was and ever shall be ... fucking dreadful.

Alex in NYC, Monday, 14 December 2015 14:27 (eight years ago) link

i'm here monster. nice think piece in the Times the other day.

surm, Monday, 28 December 2015 00:26 (eight years ago) link

two years pass...

Destroy Hero imo.

morning wood truancy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 5 February 2018 02:50 (six years ago) link

two years pass...

ilm had the worst fucking taste I swear

she’s no annie

2020 ilm asked about 2001 ilm:

OG Honeymoon Ave (morrisp), Saturday, 27 June 2020 17:05 (four years ago) link

(gif didn’t load, put a nail in it)

OG Honeymoon Ave (morrisp), Saturday, 27 June 2020 17:05 (four years ago) link

she’s no annie

This is like saying Sally Rooney is no George Eliot.

TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Saturday, 27 June 2020 17:11 (four years ago) link

it's fun to watch them come around on her when "we belong together" started smashing

dyl, Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:14 (four years ago) link

big search: memoirs of an imperfect angel; caution

specific fry such as scampo (||||||||), Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:31 (four years ago) link

Caution still sounds marvelous.

TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:32 (four years ago) link

otm, such a great album

carin' (map), Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:34 (four years ago) link

"a no no" is so much fun

carin' (map), Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:34 (four years ago) link

oh my god, i hadn't seen the video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sap-GTtCiU

carin' (map), Saturday, 27 June 2020 18:40 (four years ago) link

three months pass...

No one seems to have brought up the revelation that Mariah secretly wrote, recorded, and sang backing vocals on an alternative rock album in the midst of recording Daydream.

Fun fact: I did an alternative album while I was making Daydream 👀 Just for laughs, but it got me through some dark days. Here's a little of what I wrote about it in #TheMeaningOfMariahCarey 🤟 S/O to my friend Clarissa who performs the lead w/ me as a hidden layer #Chick #TMOMC pic.twitter.com/Re23t5whcd

— Mariah Carey (@MariahCarey) September 27, 2020

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aekQTU_pRaE

📺👁️ (peace, man), Monday, 28 September 2020 15:29 (three years ago) link

in the least surprising opinion in the history of time I think this rules

like, I’m eating an elephant head (katherine), Monday, 28 September 2020 17:02 (three years ago) link

Mariah's now saying there are versions of these tracks where she sings lead.

Johnny Fever, Monday, 28 September 2020 18:38 (three years ago) link

this was on beavis and butthead. probably the best promotion it received.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1pCtaeo3_0

billstevejim, Monday, 28 September 2020 18:39 (three years ago) link

until today obviously

billstevejim, Monday, 28 September 2020 18:40 (three years ago) link

That video’s awful, but the song’s not bad. Has anyone here listened to the full album?

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 07:02 (three years ago) link

(Tried to find a contemporaneous review, but no dice.)

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 07:06 (three years ago) link

not to get all serious but this is a really good example of just how easily a lot of '90s pop-alternative albums fell into the memory hole, regardless of stature or major-label status

like, I’m eating an elephant head (katherine), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 07:40 (three years ago) link

(that said, it is, uh, findable via the usual means)

like, I’m eating an elephant head (katherine), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 07:41 (three years ago) link

I wonder how much the single copy on Discogs was going for, prior to Sunday's reveal (it's currently at $350.00).

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 15:56 (three years ago) link

I also wonder how fast that seller scrambled to the computer to adjust the price, LOL

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:23 (three years ago) link

That's a new listing but one sold a couple of days ago for a few quid.

Kieran Arse (Noel Emits), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:31 (three years ago) link

I’ve listened to half of it so far on YouTube, with interest. 1995 alt-rock is dead center of my musical universe, so I’m very well-versed in the milieu. The songs are good, and well-written. Of course it has sort of a generic/anonymous feel, which isn’t surprising.

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:40 (three years ago) link

Man, I don't know. Mid-90's alt rock was also very much my cup of tea in those days and I feel like it's pretty unremarkable and not at all surprising that this feel by the wayside with everything else in this vein back then. Which doesn't minimize the "holy shit" factor of Mariah's involvement, but it's not doing a lot for me.

soaring skrrrtpeggios (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:43 (three years ago) link

"fell"

soaring skrrrtpeggios (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:44 (three years ago) link

I really wish I could find a CMJ review on Google books or something.

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:54 (three years ago) link

thought this was a really good piece:

https://www.theringer.com/music/2020/9/29/21493233/mariah-carey-unified-theory-the-meaning-of-mariah

Evans on Hammond (evol j), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 16:54 (three years ago) link

this was on beavis and butthead. probably the best promotion it received.

Ahh, that's why this song and video seemed so familiar. Not because I necessarily saw it on Beavis and Butthead at the time, but because of my more recent experiences of going down the rabbit hole of watching forgotten music videos that were played on Beavis and Butthead, because "90s Videos Played on Beavis and Butthead" is totally my aesthetic.

MarkoP, Tuesday, 29 September 2020 17:43 (three years ago) link

I feel like that article is trying to make me feel old!

She has transformed from mousy girl-next-door (do you even recognize this version of her from 1993?)

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 18:06 (three years ago) link

xp I actually couldn't find B&B watching Chick on Youtube but it's probably deep in there somewhere.

billstevejim, Tuesday, 29 September 2020 21:42 (three years ago) link

There's so little about this album online (only 4 pages of Google hits if you search chick "someone's ugly daughter" -mariah), you would almost think it's a hoax, if not for the apparent authenticity of some of those hits!

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 21:55 (three years ago) link

Present-day Mariah Carey is in the same category as Bruce Springsteen for me: interviews are often very interesting, zero interest in hearing the music.

but also fuck you (unperson), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 21:55 (three years ago) link

xp Like, Sony must have baaaarely released it. I wonder how much radio play "Malibu" got (if any).

The top Amazon review is interesting:

C. Hughes
5.0 out of 5 stars Chick was fun.
Reviewed in the United States on June 17, 2015
Verified Purchase
I loved making this CD- glad (a couple of) people are enjoying it. There is a secret ingredient ;) CDD

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 22:01 (three years ago) link

Can't find it, but wasn't there a thing that went around tumblr (inspired by the rumored existence of this album, I think) about how people who think Kurt Cobain wrote Live Through This are overlooking that it was actually Mariah?

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Tuesday, 29 September 2020 22:02 (three years ago) link

I didn't find anything in Lexis Nexis from before this weekend.

📺👁️ (peace, man), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 10:38 (three years ago) link

If there had been any knowledge of Mariah's involvement in the Chick album prior to this weekend, the price for it would've gone up a long time ago. This was new news.

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 30 September 2020 11:54 (three years ago) link

Find it impressive she managed to sit on this secret for 25 years.

✖✖✖ (Moka), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 12:49 (three years ago) link

Found it! (in this old tweet I liked)

this is mine pic.twitter.com/T0WSyfVxTx

— Peyton Thomas (@peytonology) August 6, 2018

Doesn't mention Chick specifically, but I wondered why this news seemed familiar. Not sure what interview is being cited, though.

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 18:20 (three years ago) link

lol @ that final point

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 18:26 (three years ago) link

My bff has ordered The Meaning Of Mariah and is listening to it as an audiobook rn and says it is completely amazing, that Mariah has gone through some unspeakably insane shit and she retells this stories with an "...awkward! lol" kind of off-handedness that is devastating. He's gonna lend me the hard copy when it arrives and I can't wait

flamboyant goon tie included, Wednesday, 30 September 2020 18:35 (three years ago) link

I really wish I could find a CMJ review on Google books or something.

― I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Tuesday, September 29, 2020 11:54 AM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Billboard reviewed the single.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ei8SjAHXcAAMrDs?format=png&name=small

jaymc, Wednesday, 30 September 2020 19:23 (three years ago) link

Nice find!! (and pretty on-point blurb)

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 19:34 (three years ago) link

Nice work, jaymc!

📺👁️ (peace, man), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 19:51 (three years ago) link

I didn't find it! Annie Zaleski posted it on Twitter.

jaymc, Wednesday, 30 September 2020 20:11 (three years ago) link

Those cultural refs are perfectly aligned with what bands like Bunnygrunt were singing about that same year ('70s kitsch, cheesy TV, etc.)

I Hate the Aedes (morrisp), Wednesday, 30 September 2020 20:13 (three years ago) link

seven months pass...

Pitchfork talked to a few people about the recording/release of the Chick album: https://pitchfork.com/thepitch/the-story-behind-mariah-careys-secret-90s-alt-rock-album/

like a d4mn sociopath! (morrisp), Sunday, 23 May 2021 04:04 (three years ago) link


You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.