Awesome Audiophile Snake Oil

lololololol

"The very best sound was obtained when I slightly loosened the screws on the Duplex Covers. And they sound great!!.

8]

lolololol

every product on the site is like New Hope for the Ape-Eared

i love that website! check out this fancy table: http://machinadynamica.com/machina25.htm

it's supposed to isolate your amplifier from vibrations, "especially the 0 -10 Hz variety produced by Earth's crust movement, traffic, subways, tides, etc. "

how a spring could cancel out waves slower than 1 Hz?

but the best is this "teleportation tweak"
http://machinadynamica.com/machina60.htm

everything on there is great but I'm still standing by the Tru-Tone Duplex cover as the most balls-out

http://www.hometheaterhifi.com/volume_12_3/marigo-labs-signature-3d-mat-7-2005.html

oh wait though codename turquoise is pretty fucking rad

Brilliant Pebbles is my favorite one on that site i think

From cidepress' link, this was amusing:

"Where most audiophiles would agree, however, is that tweaks are a minor aspect of system building. Defined by the dictionary in Microsoft Word® as "a slight adjustment or change in..."

italics mine.

http://machinadynamica.com/water.gif for brains

Somewhere, audiophile dude pushes the leather sofa away from the wall, sees four-socket outlet, shrieks.

Well, these are great, but you don't have to spend a lot of money to improve sound:

http://www.belt.demon.co.uk/Free_Techniques/Free_Techniques.html

Holy shit the Teleportation Tweak! We are dealing with <i>balls</i> here, gentlemen. Big, round, shiny balls, of finest brass, lovingly hand-polished to a mirror shine by a taskforce of brilliant Sound Artisans. These balls can be yours for the astonishingly low price of $680 (Big Shiny Brass Balls are not subject to our 30-day money-back guarantee)

it doesn't actually take any courage to be a con man, is the thing. you just have to really, really hate everybody.

The interesting thing about these tweaks is that they abandon the pretense of scientific support. Whereas w/ feet for speaker stands in Stereophile or whatever they'll be some physicist explaining how the damping works, here's it's just like, Hey, put this magic clock in the room and it'll improve the sound. I love it.

Sorry, maybe I'm Billy-doesn't-get-it, but is this site real or an elaborate spoof?

I had initially assumed spoof, but I followed some links and poked around and it appears to be real, or at least elaborate enough a spoof to include three or four different sites. Stereophile had an article on some of these tweaks a few years ago anyway:

http://www.stereophile.com/news/10415/

even if it is a spoof there's certainly enough real snake-oil products with extremely similar purposes/explanations

here's a collection of some more: http://www.ilikejam.dsl.pipex.com/audiophile.htm

i know someone who swears by this ....
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=280182123367&ssPageName=STRK:MEWA:IT&ih=018

"extremely flat"

I don't even know what "a richer, fuller sound, with less emphasis of detail" means. it's supposed to be a good thing?

My latest tweak = this chair;

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Photo624.jpg

i'm actually buying a glass platter for my turntable. i might even buy that mat for it. i'm a sucka 4 luv.

actually the chair i'm assuming was a joke, but honestly i was suprised how much getting speaker stands and "correctly" positioning my chair i listen in and the speakers in the room made a HUGE difference in how good things sounded.

The chair's totally not a joke; it's expensive and comfortable and easily moved but it's not likely to make me fall asleep in it (no headrest); if I'm comfortable and awake, I can concentrate on listening more. I bought it (almost) with the sole intention of it being a 'headphones' chair.

But yeah, basic physics says position your speakers correctly and sit in the right spot; you simply don't get stereo-imaging without it.

http://www.engadget.com/2008/03/03/audiophiles-cant-tell-the-difference-between-monster-cable-and/

...a coat hanger.

that's AMAZING.
audiophiles are some weird people, man.

actually the chair i'm assuming was a joke, but honestly i was suprised how much getting speaker stands and "correctly" positioning my chair i listen in and the speakers in the room made a HUGE difference in how good things sounded.

-- M@tt He1ges0n, Thursday, December 13, 2007 11:39 PM

totally true

actually properly treating one's room acoustically would probably do a better job than moving your chair and speakers about

is there already a company selling audiophile interior house paint?

because if there is, I should start selling audiophile EXTERIOR house paint.

(xpost)
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cb/Dbsts2.jpg

I was much, much less impressed with this enormous fucking Naim set-up than I should have been given how much it ought to have cost. Sure it went LOUD, but sound-wise I wouldn't swap it for my own system, I don't think.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/IMG_0126.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/IMG_0128.jpg

Is it just perspective on that first photo, or are your speakers nearly at shoulder height?

Oh, no - is that a Cyrus CD player? Or tuner? And why isn't everything on Mana shelves? That's why it doesn't sound that good. And has it been on continuously for five years? Another biggie with Naimists. (Seriously, that doesn't look like a great room for those huge - and amazingly ugly - speakers).

What's the turntable - Nottingham Spacedek or something? Oracle Delphi?

mp3s out a old marantz amp someone gave me and 15 y/o bottom of the line cambridge soundworks speakers all day babay

although i did love to read sudiophile magazines when i worked at a bookstore just for the lulz

The speakers are nearly to chest height - I'm 5'8".

The Cyrus is just a DAC for his wireless streaming thing. Dunno what the turntable is. The room is big but odd; it's a loft that used to be three bedrooms. There's a (low) double bed behind the speakers, plus a desk, which is where I slept (not the desk) (although that picture was taken at 6am so sleeping wasn't exactly urgent and key that weekend).

Yeah, I really wish someone had just given me a peek into my co-habiting/flat in communal block/married-with-kids future when I was handing over the moolah for all my gear in 1996-97. I wish I'd just got something good/2nd-hand with a small footprint (Cyrus CD/integrated, ProAc speakers, something like that; maybe a Pro-Ject record deck, old Marantz cassette deck, NAD tuner, cables from Maplin) and STOPPED there. Think of all the photographic gear I could've bought with the money saved if I'd just contracted that particular hobbyist bug a decade earlier!

(Ah, DAC for wireless streaming; the Naim box-stacking is kinda insane - external power supplies for everything. Makes my Audiolab pre/mono arrangement look positively understated).

The speakers are Naim DBLs. They weigh about 15st each. Retail these days at £15k. When he got them, in 2000, they should have been £12k. He got them for £4k cos they were "shop-soiled" - the band he's in had an arrangement with Naim and they'd been using them as a playback set-up when they recorded an album in a country house, and the guitarist's dog had taken a bite out of the bottom corner of one, or something.

I'm kind of glad I've had a brush with stuff that's seriously high-end because it's warned me off a bit. Our flat's not that small, but it's a flat nonetheless, and, you know, I want stuff on the walls and holidays and a new camera and stuff maybe too.

I think my main response to audiophilia these days is that the best way to make your hi-fi sound great is to play better records on it.

actually properly treating one's room acoustically would probably do a better job than moving your chair and speakers about

How so?

the best way to make your hi-fi sound great is to play better records on it.

b i n g o

if anyone is looking for really great speakers that won't break your bank....i bought these about a year ago and couldn't be more pleased with them...they are really surprising given the price and size:

Epos ELS 3 mini monitors:

http://www.musicdirect.com/product/73457

i run them with a Cambridge Audio integrated amp w/Cambridge phono pre-amp.....

My turntable is a Rega P1 -- one thing on that i would recommend is buying a glass platter and also i replaced the original ortofon cartridge with a Denon DL 160 cartridge which is a fucking amazing cartridge for the price...

For CD player I run a really really old NAD one that I got off craigslist for $35...it works pretty well, has a hard time tracking CD-Rs but will play them after awhile (it's from 87 though so I guess there weren't even CD-Rs then)

Post more pics of slobs in garrets seasoned with with ridiculous sound systems and ugly furniture.

I really like the coffee table.

I think my favourite way / place to listen to music these days, rather than the big sofa and NAD / Cambridge Audio / Tannoy / proper rack & stands set-up in the living room, with everything anchored in a nice triangle, blah blah, equidistant from rear walls, speakers toed in, is the hotch-potch system in the back room, with the knackered Marantz CD, 20-year-old Marantz amp, DAC, and diddy Q Acoustics speakers. Cos I have space, peace, my comfy chair, books, headphones, no TV or console to distract.

Those are the kind of speakers you buy to justify having previously bought Monster Cable.

What's the sensitivity rating on those things? It might be all show, but they certainly look like they could bring on an involuntary bowel movement.

what a weird, writing-free piece. The no-nonsense phono is the best thing about it (I use that one with my tiny class T speaker amp)... but do not buy one for your vinyl loving friend, unless they can't actually listen to vinyl and lack of a photo stage is the specific reason why.

I wouldn't be mad if someone got me some outer sleeves

also isolation is an issue if you, like, can't dance near the table. but that's when you make a little shelf on the wall

yeah, the plastic sleeves are good (and seem to keep my cat from attempting to claw records)

ha, they have the opposite effect on my cat - he loves to chew the plastic, i cant ever leave a record out

I dislike those sleeves for aesthetic reasons. Then I worry that I'm neglecting my LPs. But no, I can't bring myself to use them

sleeve city outer sleevs are my favorite but i have yet to find a satisfying solution for doubles/gatefolds

for every possible way to protect your possessions, there is a cat who has figured out how to counter it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5poEu9uBwyM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=La3U41b0WSU

xpost to mh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7dcSr04G8s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tHOUV_bJn8

Kind of a bummer/guilt-trip final selection on that Pfork list.

No one said loving vinyl was easy. Between caring for old records and getting the best sound out of your gear, being a turntable devotee is as rewarding as it is intensive

*sigh* speak for yourself re this whole vinyl is hard nonsense

ok how do you pronounce ‘phono’?

does it rhyme with slo-mo or Bono?

(or Pono)

Pono

like phonograph

Thanks

I said it in conversation last night and realised that it’s a term I’ve never actually spoken aloud and someone said “is that how you say it?” and I freaked out

RIP Stereophile's Art Dudley

enjoyed his writing

https://www.stereophile.com/content/art-dudley-rest-peace

oh man I have read a lot of art dudley columns over the years... RIP Art.

yeah he was one of the good ones

damn, Listener was a great little magazine.

https://jcat.eu/featured/m12-switch-gold/

What a shame they have to sully it with an RJ45 connector at the other end of the wire, albeit one from the space station where “air” and “fine grained ambience” are a must for all data

amazing

thank god that the audiophiles have finally invented a 5 port unmanaged ethernet switch you can spend 4000+ euro on

NB I checked eBay you can get a Juniper EX4200 for like less than $100

an acquaintance observes that the M12 connector, having only two twisted pairs, is insufficient to actually deliver gigabit ethernet, so this dumb thing doesn't even work

https://i.imgur.com/eaa92jl.jpg

psych - this is a real ad

That seems...reasonable? Analogue TV tech remains amazing to me!

Who knew? "Snivets are thin parallel vertical lines which may appear at one or more positions of the reproduced image. It has been suggested that the production of such thin vertical lines is due to Barkhausen oscillations developed in the horizontal output tube."

the history of analog TV tech is fascinating, even more than the history of radio

How does this ... possibly work

https://www.stereogum.com/2101286/oda-speakers-jessica-pratt-madlib-arca-microphones-standing-on-the-corner/news/

Two wireless speakers vibrating across your wooden floor connected by wireless internet... I'm sure this sounds just like being at a concert

The idea is to sit a drink on one of them, and then at some point the speaker treads on your foot and spills the drink on you.

huh...weird

honestly half of it is they are going to put in the instructions that people need properly space the speakers and everyone will be impressed by the stereo field

should probably be in mono to sound live

I've been using a product called a 'record butler' which is just a felt oven glove/circular disc grabber for records ( not even that cool).

it seems to work, or at least enough that its part of my listening at home ritual.

Off topic for this thread as I got it free with a purchase and it probably does the thing its supposed to.

but I can confirm it has stopped the 'holding records so delicately that you drop them and cause more damage than if you had been holding them properly' issue.

Those speakers just look like surface speakers. They've been popular recently with lots of people don't things like this:

https://www.yankodesign.com/2019/07/27/place-this-puck-sized-gadget-on-any-surface-to-transform-it-into-a-vibrating-speaker/

Those look like the vibrating surface, the wood at the front, is built in. Not that different from the paper or plastic cone in normal speakers. I'm unconvinced by the puck things tbh, think you'd need the surface to be relatively free to move, which maybe those speakers improve upon.

Selling speakers as part of a gig subscription service is a bit weird. In fact, a gig subscription service is also weird.

(although, thinking about it, cinema season tickets exist)

Pono type of business

guys i just bought new speakers. they need stands. so i bought the stands. did i buy sand to go into the stands? reader, i did.

Audiophile sand?

I'm offended you even have to ask

I take it you're aware of Atabites SMD-Z 7HD Inert Filler

Sand seems like a pretty obvious benefit if for no other reason than to make the stands heavier and more stable.

Yes - with kids and a growing puppy it seems like a good idea

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHde39Lkxww

Tracer otm, i stan stand sand

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGI1cqXU9h4