pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

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Donald
Oh my God, what just happened at P-Fork
Mon Apr 1 07:08:25 2002
63.167.209.146

I'm not going to spew any elitist bullshit, but Alanis Morrissette, Kylie Minogue? Oh my fucking God. I'll stay for a little while to see if P-Fork still serves my needs, but with today's front page, I'm not counting on it. I understand the career move, but I just don't think it's going to serve me any more.

jess, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

stu Re: Oh my God, what just happened at P-Fork Mon Apr 1 07:41:08 2002 65.92.243.96

I wonder if it's going to serve anyone's needs. I don't think a web- only publication can attract readers interested in Alanis Morissette and Kylie Minogue. To my knowledge, no one actually hunts down information about such artists. People just hear about it on tv and that's it. Let's give Pitchfork a few months, until the corporate contributors pull the plug.

Mitch Lastnamewithheld, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I am very disappointed. Could they have made it any more obvious? COME ON, PEOPLE.

David Raposa, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I don't think a web- only publication can attract readers interested in Alanis Morissette and Kylie Minogue.

QUOTE OF THE YEAR.

jess, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

What makes me think that things will be back to normal by tomorrow? ;)

Sean Carruthers, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I don't know Sean... it would be April 2nd, which would make it one day after...

Andy K, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

You scalawags, you make me laff. Perhaps.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Speaking of which, HEY NED! My Bloody Valentine are finally releasing their new album!

Sean Carruthers, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

We thought about that as one of the news items.

Dare, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

"i for one will not be returning to this site if you're seriously going to be reviewing alanis. like i can't read that shit everywhere and anywhere? the reason i had pitchfork as my home page was because i could actually find out about the shit i care about. i'm glad you can pay your rent now, it's too bad that you sold out your millions of readers for britney fans in body glitter to do it."

Dare, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

pitchfork as your homepage, classic or dud?

the first thing i thought (after, well, this is no all cure all the time) was that i wished they really had "sold out" (what the fuck, is this 93?), because maybe it would mean LESS GODDAMN PROG.

jess, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

he's calling you out, leone. FITE!

Todd Burns, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I think I'd rather read about Alanis and Kylie than most of the stuff they normally review.

Sean, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Their funniest joke came months ago.

Nicole, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I don't know what all you fools are talking about... I only WISH all of it were true.

Well, the Albini thing practically is...

mr. sparkle, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

We thought about that as one of the news items.

Makes sense, really.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I don't know what all you fools are talking about... I only WISH all of it were true.

Well, the Albini thing practically is... huh???

Brock K., Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

LESS GODDAMN PROG

So, does that mean we'll write about the next Radiohead album, or not?

dleone, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

And that Flaming Lips thing actually is true. I think.

powertonevolume, Monday, 1 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Hein? Is the joke that Pitchfork reviewed some pop musik?? Even their KYLIE review was as dull as www.defra.gov.uk/farm/sustain/default.htm ARRRGHHHHHHHHH!! Then again Pitchfork = dull is a big shocker along the lines of Nelson in COLUMN!!!!!! shocker.

Sarah, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

'On' column? 'HAS' column?! I can see him from my bladdy window but does that help my BRANE I think NICHT.

Sarah, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Dom, how much of the Kylie review was farce? "The song exudes a catchiness that belies its inherent simplicity, so reassuring during an era when chart acts sound increasingly baroque and producers race to see who can ape electronic music trends first" sounds at least semi-serious.

Mitch Lastnamewithheld, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

that is because kylie is, like sophie ellis bextor, going for a retro- mancuso/levan vibe, with all the classicism inherent in such an endeavour.

gareth, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Actually, I did try to write about that record in the same way I would have for anything else at Pitchfork. I thought the gag would be better if people really thought we were changing styles, and Spin may be full of ads, but at least the reviews aren't jokes! As far as I know, anyway. Dullness wasn't intentional though.

dleone, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

best e-mail address ever, eh starbar?

dudley, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Dead right sir. Power shandies all round to the geezer behind it eh?

Sarah, Wednesday, 3 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

From: DWilliams@EQRWORLD.com Subject: NO, Just Admit You Like It Up There

You have completed your learning of life's lessons. Now, you suck ass just like all the other bores before you. Kylie, Alanis? Whatever, bitch. I am sure you already have the defense mechanisms in place so, this will mean nothing but, another exercise in...oh, who cares. Looking elsewhere for reality...or maybe I can pretend to be a rubber worm like pitchwhore.com...here big fishie, look, I rounded 'em up for you in a arrel. A whole demographic!

Not Funny

Dare, Thursday, 4 April 2002 00:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

five years pass...

Y'know sometimes they really are asking for it:

"White Williams issues a debut album layered with impeccable influences-- including Roxy Music, Beck, and T. Rex-- and a sense of calculated disaffection."

Well shit SIGN ME UP.

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 18:57 (ten years ago) Permalink

Yeah, that was a bit of a repellant blurb if I ever saw one.

Z S, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:01 (ten years ago) Permalink

Wait, are you saying that doesn't seem accurate?

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:10 (ten years ago) Permalink

I read 'White' as 'While' and thought "The Saul Williams album sounds like that?"

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:11 (ten years ago) Permalink

it's more that they used that as their _hook_

x-post

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:20 (ten years ago) Permalink

The front blurbs are always stripped/condensed summary descriptions from the review inside -- in this case

His songs are thin and languorous, with impeccable influences and the sort of calculated disaffection that comes from an MFA in design and a good weed connection.

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:46 (ten years ago) Permalink

omg that is horrorshow

The blurb >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> the article quote

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:18 (ten years ago) Permalink

I assume that's an article quote; nabisco, if you just made that up then SHAME ON YOU.

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:22 (ten years ago) Permalink

why would a critic ever try to guess where a song comes from?

Mr. Que, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:23 (ten years ago) Permalink

I'm more bothered by beck as impeccable influence

dmr, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:24 (ten years ago) Permalink

Wait, are you saying that doesn't seem accurate?

The description of "a sense of calculated disaffection", a combination of words that makes me imagine the shittiest band of all time, followed by "recommended" was repellant for me. I guess I like my disaffection to be natural, not carefully planned, so I would never recommend something like that.

Then again, I've never heard it so what do I know and so on.

Z S, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:29 (ten years ago) Permalink

b-but someone at pfork said "hm, how can we get people to read this review? I know! we'll mention the artist's impeccable influences and calculated disaffection! that'll reel 'em in!"

RIP satire etc

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:34 (ten years ago) Permalink

they could have collaged+mis-used _anything_ from the article, and they collaged+mis-used that

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:35 (ten years ago) Permalink

The White Williams album reminds me much more of late 10cc and Bread than of Roxy Music. That bit was like the classic "Let's over-hip our influences" review.

I eat cannibals, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:54 (ten years ago) Permalink

The description of "a sense of calculated disaffection", a combination of words that makes me imagine the shittiest band of all time, followed by "recommended" was repellant for me.

See, this sounds like the blurb WORKED for you -- i.e., efficiently let you know you would probably not like this act.

I agree, though, it looks kind of weird to have such a neutral-to-disparaging summary blurb on a recommended album.

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 22:04 (ten years ago) Permalink

I like how they gave the new Babyshambles, which is actually tuneful and a good all around album, a 4.0, but gave the first one, which is dreadful and hard to listen to / bloated, a 7.3,

Yeah, it was definitely TWICE as good as the new one. Fuckin' morons.

Erock Zombie, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:30 (ten years ago) Permalink

ugh, "impeccable influences" is really repulsive.

Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:46 (ten years ago) Permalink

(xpost) was that a parody or are you really getting worked up about an internet score for babyshambles

dmr, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:47 (ten years ago) Permalink

He was worked up?

roxymuzak, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:49 (ten years ago) Permalink

wait, i thought the grading scale was logarithmic. like 5 is twice as good as 4. somebody email ryan schreiber to find out.

elan, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:14 (ten years ago) Permalink

shit, now i need to reevaluate all my purchases of the last five years.

elan, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:16 (ten years ago) Permalink

It's actually modelled after the Richter Scale, hence the superlative designations of various well-reviewed albums as either "Reccomended," "Best New Music," or "Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On."

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:24 (ten years ago) Permalink

Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
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Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"
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Think: "Stan Lee presents... Da Muthaf*&%in' Ghetto!"

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 16:53 (one week ago) Permalink

cappadonna the pillage and method man's tical 2000 are both underrated and better than bobby digital

It's not delivery, it's Adorno! (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Monday, 12 February 2018 16:54 (one week ago) Permalink

at least they got the #1 pick right

hoooyaaargh it's me satan (voodoo chili), Monday, 12 February 2018 16:59 (one week ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YN9muHLuHDc

scott seward, Monday, 12 February 2018 17:11 (one week ago) Permalink

Hip hop fans who were actually there at the time saw the Bobby Digital album for what it was: a complete and total disappointment. Borderline wack.

Also, xpost to scott: the best song the Black Eyed Peas ever did was the b-side to 'Fallin' Up.' It was called 'Le Rox' and only ever came out on the promo 12" single, I think.

he doesn't need to be racist about it though. (Austin), Monday, 12 February 2018 18:13 (one week ago) Permalink

I liked the Bobby Digital album in 1998, but I also was stanning for Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, Eels, Dr. Octagon, Cornershop, Fatboy Slim, Timbaland & Magoo, Soul Coughing and other Spin Magazine/120 Minutes pomo bullshit

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:27 (one week ago) Permalink

this song is so good and it has Force MDs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-jC3sIIVGY

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:32 (one week ago) Permalink

I was just thinking about the Bobby Digital record the other day because it's one of maybe a dozen CDs that I never got around to ripping to MP3. I probably only listened to it once or twice and don't really remember anything bad, just disappointing. I was also let down by the Love Movement and Moment of Truth but I've at least listened to them in the last 20 years.

joygoat, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:33 (one week ago) Permalink

it's hilarious that we're all just debating p4k's rap choices, like there's any way they'd be able to win on that front no matter what they did

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:36 (one week ago) Permalink

yeah otm, but uh, bobby digital REALLY shouldnt be on that list. you could maybe defend everything else or at least shrug them off.

fgti spinner (Spottie), Monday, 12 February 2018 18:40 (one week ago) Permalink

A creative vocabulary saves some grace, but the "pussys," "bitches" and "motherfuckers" far outweigh the "tighter than prescription bottles" and "Mr. Potatohead Ore Ida deep fried krinkle cuts."

omar little, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:40 (one week ago) Permalink

Like even if they put Goodie Mob and M.O.P. in there, there'd still be post-ethan dudes going "wow, no Fat Pat or Mac Dre, east coast bias much?!

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:41 (one week ago) Permalink

Dr. Octagon is a weird omission esp cuz it's a big part of the indie-rock friendly rap canon and a way better "eccentric" rap album pick than Bobby Digital

It's not delivery, it's Adorno! (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Monday, 12 February 2018 18:44 (one week ago) Permalink

1996, duder

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:45 (one week ago) Permalink

also don't forget that Keith was bent because he thought rza was biting his schitck

http://i1144.photobucket.com/albums/o487/thekrinker/Robbie%20Analog_zpsso5jewfe.png

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 18:50 (one week ago) Permalink

i just didn't think that anyone even still listened to the bobby digital album. it really was a bummer at the time. such a promising cover.

m.o.p. would have been a fine choice. or redman. redman and styles of beyond. played those a ton. not even the best redman album but still lots of fun.

scott seward, Monday, 12 February 2018 19:46 (one week ago) Permalink

I just wanna post this song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtzNc2hyJqM

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 19:53 (one week ago) Permalink

I can't think of a Jay Z or Nas song with rapping as good as Redman's "Da Goodness," don't @ me

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 19:57 (one week ago) Permalink

Talking to Tyshawn Sorey about Redman for The Wire was one of the most fun things I did as a journalist last year.

grawlix (unperson), Monday, 12 February 2018 19:59 (one week ago) Permalink

imo the Def Squard record is the best 98 album that has Redman on it

intheblanks, Monday, 12 February 2018 19:59 (one week ago) Permalink

Def Squad record is so good

i think everyone really did Red's career dirrty

Malpractice sucked but dude shouldn't have disappeared from the earth after he started fucking with dance music and couldn't make commercial hits. I keep saying Madlib or someone should produce a rappy-rap album for him like Freddie Gibb's Pinata, and he could be playing Bonnaroo second stage too

Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 12 February 2018 20:05 (one week ago) Permalink

The list is pretty...whatever, but no "Ocean Songs"? Lame

chr1sb3singer, Monday, 12 February 2018 20:06 (one week ago) Permalink

posted my top 40 rap albums from 98 in here

fgti spinner (Spottie), Monday, 12 February 2018 20:16 (one week ago) Permalink

i just didn't think that anyone even still listened to the bobby digital album.

i do!

j., Monday, 12 February 2018 20:18 (one week ago) Permalink

When I think of best hip hop records of 1998, Aceyalone's A Book of Human Language is always one that comes up.

Also, my hands-down most played 12" of that year was the unofficial single that Ras Kass released, 'Understandable Smooth.' It made me hopeful for his second album, but of course, there's no way in hell it would have seen an official release with that sample.

he doesn't need to be racist about it though. (Austin), Monday, 12 February 2018 20:20 (one week ago) Permalink

Rassassination had some great songs.

fgti spinner (Spottie), Monday, 12 February 2018 20:24 (one week ago) Permalink

I gave it the benefit of the doubt at the time, but, in retrospect, it was pretty not good.

he doesn't need to be racist about it though. (Austin), Monday, 12 February 2018 20:37 (one week ago) Permalink

overall yeah for sure.

fgti spinner (Spottie), Monday, 12 February 2018 20:38 (one week ago) Permalink

i like/liked the bob digi album
Docs da Name 2000 is a real important album for me; da goodness is def one of my secret fave trax

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Monday, 12 February 2018 22:01 (one week ago) Permalink

reading this list it struck me that i've continually ignored spoon for now 20 years. here's to another 20

marcos, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 17:00 (one week ago) Permalink

Now that Whiney mentioned Eels, a bid sad that Electro-shock Blues isn't on the list.

Frederik B, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 17:31 (one week ago) Permalink

i loved electro-shock blues back in the day. now i find it hard to listen to ANY eels, and i'm not sure why. they seem like one of those bands whose standing has dropped a lot in the past 20 years (i'm sure there are at least 5 threads dedicated to this subject)

Karl Malone, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 17:43 (one week ago) Permalink

maybe it's because as soon as i read eels my head goes "and i like...*whistling sound*...birds" and i'm just like noooo nooo

Karl Malone, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 17:44 (one week ago) Permalink

They were my first favorite band. They are obviously also-rans with shitty humor, but Electro-shock Blues is a legitimately great indie rock record in my book.

Frederik B, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 18:11 (one week ago) Permalink

reading this list it struck me that i've continually ignored spoon for now 20 years. here's to another 20

― marcos, Tuesday, February 13, 2018 5:00 PM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

High five

Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 13 February 2018 21:21 (one week ago) Permalink

They've been spotty since E-SB but the better halves of Blinking Lights and Daisies of the Galaxy are about on par with it.

Simon H., Tuesday, 13 February 2018 21:24 (one week ago) Permalink

E makes far too many records and quality dipped years ago now. ESB, and most of Blinking Lights are definitely the highlights for me.

so yes, this list needed ESB, Ocean Songs, Six. i'd also mention current 93 - soft black stars. hell among the yearlings? england made me...
Midwestern Songs of the Americas, Philophobia, Frame & Canvas aaaaand MECHANICAL ANIMALS!

i'd probably remove the Refused album which for me has aged really badly.
remove Boy With The Arab Strap which disappointed just about EVERYONE on release.
i'd also remove Spoon, it feels like a few things are just in there as filler because the artists did far better work later and became pitchfork darlings.

overall pretty decent list, but then hard not to find 50 good records in just about any year?

jamiesummerz, Wednesday, 14 February 2018 15:09 (six days ago) Permalink

I think they've always liked that Spoon album fwiw

Evan, Wednesday, 14 February 2018 15:33 (six days ago) Permalink

katatonia and the gathering put out my two favorite albums of 1998. they should have a separate list for metal albums.

i unfairly blame Refused for so much bad music made by others that i will always have a grudge against that album. also, i'd rather listen to when forever comes crashing which came out the same year.

scott seward, Wednesday, 14 February 2018 15:51 (six days ago) Permalink

That Belle & Sebastian was a disappointment at the time, compared to the level of Sinister. But in retrospect it’s still really good and one of their best - especially the title track.

sctttnnnt (pgwp), Wednesday, 14 February 2018 20:22 (six days ago) Permalink

A lot of downer melancholy albums on that list.

Mr. Snrub, Friday, 16 February 2018 01:29 (four days ago) Permalink

xp it's my favorite of theirs by far

brimstead, Friday, 16 February 2018 16:11 (four days ago) Permalink

By the by, really, but 1998 - Gorguts and maybe Death aside - was a weirdly shit year for metal.

The shard-borne beetle with his drowsy hums (Chinaski), Friday, 16 February 2018 17:52 (four days ago) Permalink

my fave amon amarth album came out in 1998. i played that a lot. and i loved sin/pecado by moonspell. there was good stuff. absu, naglfar, other stuff. i played my arms, your hearse a lot too but i don't really play it anymore.

scott seward, Friday, 16 February 2018 18:01 (four days ago) Permalink

I can't vouch for that entire Cannibal Corpse album but "Sentenced To Burn" is one of their best songs.

The self-titled System Of A Down is pretty solid imo.

billstevejim, Saturday, 17 February 2018 03:34 (three days ago) Permalink

https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/7978-the-hush

seems just like yesterday

mookieproof, Saturday, 17 February 2018 05:27 (three days ago) Permalink

i'd also remove Spoon, it feels like a few things are just in there as filler because the artists did far better work later and became pitchfork darlings.

― jamiesummerz, Wednesday, February 14, 2018 10:09 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I think they've always liked that Spoon album fwiw

― Evan, Wednesday, February 14, 2018 10:33 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

People who prefer post-Sneaks Spoon are weird to me.

Johnny Fever, Saturday, 17 February 2018 05:57 (three days ago) Permalink

it's all good. up until the last couple maybe

Rhine Jive Click Bait (Hadrian VIII), Saturday, 17 February 2018 06:08 (three days ago) Permalink

I assumed they thought the Spoon album was pretty good when placing it in their original top 100 of the decade.

billstevejim, Saturday, 17 February 2018 09:20 (three days ago) Permalink


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