Pitchfork fired me...

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...so you guys can't stop hating me if you want.

― Rollie Pemberton (Rollie Pemberton), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:12 (nineteen years ago) link

Are you going to post this on every message board, Rollie?

― Dare, Friday, 16 July 2004 20:17 (nineteen years ago) link

can or can't?

― Johnny Fever (johnny fever), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:18 (nineteen years ago) link

Those happy hours that we once knew
Tho' long ago, they still make me blue
They say that time heals a broken heart
But time has stood still since we've been apart

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:19 (nineteen years ago) link

i see there's another hiphop guy now. and it looks like they're back to putting scare quotes around rap slang.

― m. (mitchlnw), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:23 (nineteen years ago) link

Someone post a decent owned picture.

― Tommy Dreamer (Dom Passantino), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:27 (nineteen years ago) link

fired? for what?

― King Kobra (King Kobra), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:31 (nineteen years ago) link

Whyed they fire you? Does pitchfork pay people money? Please make fun of pitchfork from an insider's perspective.

― artdamages (artdamages), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:32 (nineteen years ago) link

Rollie, weren't you posting here under another name for a while? Or was that another Western Canadian college-age hip-hop critic?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:49 (nineteen years ago) link

yr thinking of dk/william wiggins/cloverland i think

― weasel diesel (K1l14n), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:50 (nineteen years ago) link

Hmmm. Whoever it was, there was some furtive "Chuck Eddy, did you get my e-mail" business going on.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:56 (nineteen years ago) link

Was this the most anticipated layoff of the year?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:58 (nineteen years ago) link

ihttp://us.share.geocities.com/shroomowl27/pwned.jpg

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:59 (nineteen years ago) link

gah, dammit.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:03 (nineteen years ago) link

Wait, someone explain what "owned" pictures are meant to be... after hearing a few different people mention this, I did a google image search, and I still don't think I totally get it. Pics of people getting hurt, or sleeping sorority girls with guys' balls on their head? How did this trend start?

― Neb Reyob (Ben Boyer), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:22 (nineteen years ago) link

why'd he get sacked?

― pooky, Friday, 16 July 2004 21:47 (nineteen years ago) link

Apparently someone thought it might make a humorous "owned photo."

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:02 (nineteen years ago) link

Nice x-post with Neb's post, pooky.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:40 (nineteen years ago) link

isnt 'owned' haxor speak?

― bill stevens (bscrubbins), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:09 (nineteen years ago) link

P W N E D

― dean? (deangulberry), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:10 (nineteen years ago) link

prawned

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:28 (nineteen years ago) link

pwmped

― weatheringD, Friday, 16 July 2004 23:46 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid66/pb6638d21071582edafea42de53256a8e/fbe181b2.gif

― j.lu (j.lu), Saturday, 17 July 2004 00:04 (nineteen years ago) link

Getting fired by Pitchfork is something of a diploma of the reverse order.

― maria b (maria b), Saturday, 17 July 2004 00:47 (nineteen years ago) link

p0wn3d

― DAziz, Saturday, 17 July 2004 03:58 (nineteen years ago) link

hey, why didn't my image show up? I just got owned while trying to post about someone getting owned. this is what i wanted:

http://www.dbddivis.com/Pictures/Rubber/57stallowned.gif

― Daziz, Saturday, 17 July 2004 03:59 (nineteen years ago) link

welcome to the club of fired PF writers, Rollie! I'd like to think it's somehow a more prestigious (though surely not more exclusive) club than unfired PF writers. maybe sometime you and me and Ethan can get together for drinks and share stories and war wounds. I agreed with or at least appreciated your reviews probably more often than not and you're at least tons better than the guy who seems to have filled your role now.

― Al (sitcom), Saturday, 17 July 2004 05:03 (nineteen years ago) link

Ring ring ring ring ring ring bananaphone!

― Andrzej B. (Andrzej B.), Saturday, 17 July 2004 05:12 (nineteen years ago) link

I got fired because my writing was "too unclear to edit". That was the official reason. But I think it was because every time I sent a review, I also asked for the money I was owed. And I was late on deadlines. I'm also black. I'm not as upset as I was before. I don't even have the internet at my house, how much could I have gotten done?

High five, Al. Totally rad.

― Rollie Pemberton (Rollie Pemberton), Saturday, 17 July 2004 17:13 (nineteen years ago) link

But I think it was because every time I sent a review, I also asked for the money I was owed. And I was late on deadlines. I'm also black.

Maybe Ryan's late with my "paycheck" because I'm Norwegian?

― Chris Dahlen (Chris Dahlen), Saturday, 17 July 2004 17:36 (nineteen years ago) link

Freelance music journalist in late check shockah.

― Dave Segal (Da ve Segal), Saturday, 17 July 2004 18:01 (nineteen years ago) link

And everyone knows that the WATW section just got flooded with material because Ryan outsourced the work to India, right?

― Chris Dahlen (Chris Dahlen), Saturday, 17 July 2004 18:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Did you know my name is dutch?

Or British? I used to know. I forgot now.

I thought the outsourcing was directly to Taiwan, where the cracking fingers of children type stilted five-paragraph reviews of Spoon songs for Mush Records promos and internet stardom.

― Rollie Pemberton (Rollie Pemberton), Saturday, 17 July 2004 18:15 (nineteen years ago) link

I would take that job! In fact, I'd like to only write Spoon reviews.

― artdamages (artdamages), Saturday, 17 July 2004 18:23 (nineteen years ago) link

I got fired because my writing was "too unclear to edit".

People at Pitchfork worry about unclear writing?

― Symplistic (shmuel), Saturday, 17 July 2004 18:59 (nineteen years ago) link

People at Pitchfork worry about editing?

― obviousjoke, Saturday, 17 July 2004 19:19 (nineteen years ago) link

sorry rollie. i'd have fired you because i disagreed with your young gunz review, but getting fired because you ask for your paycheck on time is the lameness.

the editing comment is strange too, FWIW i wouldn't class you with the difficult/lazy writers on pitchfork.

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 18 July 2004 01:00 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm also black.

Uh, tossing that around as a reason for termination is a rather heavy charge. If you truly believe this is even remotely one of the reasons why you were fired, then you should get an attorney.

― frankE (frankE), Sunday, 18 July 2004 01:37 (nineteen years ago) link

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0312181116.01._PE_PIdp-schmoo2,TopRight,7,-26_SCMZZZZZZZ_.gif

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Sunday, 18 July 2004 01:41 (nineteen years ago) link

not to take the conversation away from your grievances rollie, but on the subject of that young gunz review:

1) i tend to dislike concept reviews on pitchfork. yes, i realize that is like the generic easy complaint about pitchfork. yes, i realize that certain hip-hop pitchforkers get away with it. anyway i think your "straight" reviews are better than your concept reviews. you should do some gonzo reviews, i don't think i've ever seen any of those from you.

2) all of the songs you reference in the third "stanza" (the third section between ***s) are bangers. you seem to acknowledge that. yes, that only accounts for 1/3rd of the album. still, by my reckoning the strength of those tracks makes the album at least an 8.1 (if not a 9.1!) rather than a 4.1. i've listened to it a lot this year, always skipping from "$$$ girls" to the chingy remix and then letting it start over.

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 18 July 2004 02:44 (nineteen years ago) link

So are there enough ex-Pitchfork writers out there now to be able to form some kind of Legion of Doom to PF's Super Friends? If so, I would like to be Mr. Mxyzptlk.

― Nick Mirov (nick), Sunday, 18 July 2004 07:41 (nineteen years ago) link

why does ryan feel the need to make up so many name for "new" writers? and why do they always sound like falcon's crest characters? does he just think they sound indie?

― just a question, Sunday, 18 July 2004 10:04 (nineteen years ago) link

Uh, tossing that around as a reason for termination is a rather heavy charge. If you truly believe this is even remotely one of the reasons why you were fired, then you should get an attorney.

I do think he was kidding, d00d (tho PITCHFORK ON TRIAL FOR RACIAL DISCRIMINATION would of course be the greatest/worst thing evah!)

― Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Sunday, 18 July 2004 10:21 (nineteen years ago) link

They make up names?

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Sunday, 18 July 2004 13:35 (nineteen years ago) link

come on -- Sam Ubl (an Ultimate Band List pun, i presume)?

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Sunday, 18 July 2004 15:50 (nineteen years ago) link

Rollie: your science was too tight.

Continue kicking ass and handing out the dummy smacks elsewhere.

― ng, Sunday, 18 July 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

vahid, when leveling out a mark, i'd usually look at the amount of replay, amount of solid songs, how much i like said solid songs and other extinuating circumstances (album length, conceptual depth, etc.). in the case of young gunz, which i don't listen to at all, except for $$$ Girls, the few songs i do like, i really don't like that much.

also, define a 'gonzo review'.

― Rollie Pemberton (Rollie Pemberton), Sunday, 18 July 2004 19:20 (nineteen years ago) link

'gonzo review' = ***** Crazies Everywhere, Everybody's GONZO!, May 31, 2001
Reviewer: meggreg4 (Canton, NY USA)
The 10 Motown Digits of Doom at their finest. One of the great live rock and roll albums of all time (along with Seger's LIVE BULLET, Skynyrd's ONE MORE FOR THE ROAD, and Zeppelin's SONG REMAINS THE SAME). This one captures Ted at his high-energy, ear-splitting, lickety split best. Unparalleled guitar playing, Ted as the First White Rapper, Nuge's primal screams - it's all here. As a veteran of a half dozen Ted shows (most in his hometown of Detroit), DOUBLE LIVE GONZO is a terrific representation of one of the 70s' great rockers. Opens with a souped-up "Just What the Doctor Ordered" and closes, as it should, with "Motor City Madhouse." What's in between is worth cranking up the volume all the way to 11 (eh, Spinal Tap fans?). Highlights are "Stormtroopin'" and an incredible version of "Great White Buffalo" that showcases Ted's amazing guitar virtuosity. Even the album cover, with the Motor City Madman, complete with tail (yes, an actual tail), getting blasted with a wall of sound is worth the price. If you've got room on the rack for only one Nugent CD, this is the one. It's such a madhouse.

― cinniblount (James Blount), Sunday, 18 July 2004 19:27 (nineteen years ago) link

blount OTM as usual

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 18 July 2004 19:32 (nineteen years ago) link

He sort of ruined it w/the tired "If you need one album by this artist" bit.

― artdamages (artdamages), Sunday, 18 July 2004 19:53 (nineteen years ago) link

This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pusy.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Sunday, 18 July 2004 20:18 (nineteen years ago) link

rollie is a great writer, one of the few at Pitchfork i enjoy or respect or trust. this sucks. if you don't mind being unpaid, i'd love you to write for me at Loose Lips Sink Ships.

― stevie (stevie), Sunday, 18 July 2004 22:14 (nineteen years ago) link

is there any way to access the old pitchfork singles reviews?

― jake b. (cerybut), Sunday, 18 July 2004 22:50 (nineteen years ago) link

Ying Yang Twins [ft. Trick Daddy]: "Whats Happnin!"
I've been sitting here for at least an hour trying to figure out the most acceptable way for a white boy to sing along to this chorus. "Boom/ It's on/ Hair trigger, we'll rock your dome?" "Ditch licker, we'll rock your dome?" Maybe I'll just crank the volume up and let the Ying Yang Twins take care of business. But they can get away with so much more than just reverse racial slurring: They've dropped in a synth riff that, outside its crunk-as-fuck context, would be straight-up 80s; they boast ragged and aggressive delivery while retaining a sense of playfulness; and they can hone a three-syllable verb down to one monosyllabic grunt: "Bitch, what's hayyyhhn." The quick rise of this single lies in the ubiquitous sound that Lil' Jon made viable, and that this song preserves just enough melody in those synths to hold interest beyond their guttural, Cro-Magnon chorus. Though the kids of Cooley High are sadly absent, "Whats Happnin!" still keeps a narrow foothold over recent radio hits borne of the same blueprint. Kitsch digger, we'll rock your dome...? [Jason Crock; July 14th, 2004]

COME BACK ROLLIE ALL IS FORGIVEN

― Symplistic (shmuel), Sunday, 18 July 2004 23:31 (nineteen years ago) link

"Cro-Magnon chorus"

― Symplistic (shmuel), Sunday, 18 July 2004 23:32 (nineteen years ago) link

"reverse racial slurring"

― djdee2005, Monday, 19 July 2004 04:19 (nineteen years ago) link

"the kids of Cooley High are sadly absent"
Hey, this is fun!

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Monday, 19 July 2004 06:34 (nineteen years ago) link

"white"

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Monday, 19 July 2004 08:34 (nineteen years ago) link

"g{...}o [...] away [...] Jason Crock"

― artdamages (artdamages), Monday, 19 July 2004 09:44 (nineteen years ago) link

The band's source material sends an instant message: They proudly indulge in the mainstream, and for the most part, spurn any artists who might cast a shadow of underground elitism. (Even Dizzee Rascal, a somewhat exotic phenom in the States, gets radio play in the UK.) Along with crossover heroes like Kanye West, Jay-Z, and Missy Elliott, 50 Cent's G Unit and a host of Wu alumni appear. The ominous thug melodrama is curious-- I have a hard time envisioning two skinny white kids personally relating to the desperate urgency of "Run", Ghostface Killah's panicked rant with Jadakiss. But such is the voyeuristic, class-spanning pleasure of modern hip-hop, and the gospel organ grind that haunts the track, or the gothic piano tiptoe on G Unit's "Stunt 101", keep them dark and deep.

― Symplistic (shmuel), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 02:13 (nineteen years ago) link

skinny white kids can't feel desperate urgency! white people are making mash-ups with music made by black people! where will it end??!

― Symplistic (shmuel), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 02:16 (nineteen years ago) link

If I had to relate to all the music I listened to, I'd have such horrible taste in music.

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 28 July 2004 04:31 (nineteen years ago) link

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