Rolling Worst Music of 2017

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMb4TGFEVYw

"Today we share a new song to inspire the weary-disappointed hearts of so many crest-fallen citizens. We just started working on a new album, but “Smoke ‘em Out” begged to be turned loose on the world now, as a means of participation during these turbulent yet invigorating times. Joined on guest vocals by our fellow Future Feminist ANOHNI, “Smoke ‘em Out” welcomes the new character who will be occupying the White House with a mob of women and children armed with forks and knives. In the wake of this unnatural disaster, we feel a call to rise, shout, and burn the house down. The future is female.
peace, Bianca & Sierra Casady"

"begged to be turned loose"

self-clowning oven (Murgatroid), Wednesday, 18 January 2017 02:07 (six months ago) Permalink

also, i got blocked from Anohni's FB page when I dared to bring up CocoRosie's Kill Whitey parties when she posted a link to the song lmao

self-clowning oven (Murgatroid), Wednesday, 18 January 2017 02:09 (six months ago) Permalink

two weeks pass...

fault in our stars actor & lowkey EDM festival DJ attempts to breaks out as a budding pop star with hilariously atrocious results:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4gsAS8h3p0

joshywinty (josh), Monday, 6 February 2017 22:02 (five months ago) Permalink

Watching the Beta Boys video from the previous year's thread led me down a Youtube recommend alley to the work of their sole female member, "Fellatia Geisha". It's, um, interesting. Not exactly good interesting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OvXyrySKtU

Camaraderie at Arms Length, Monday, 6 February 2017 22:13 (five months ago) Permalink

Oh wow, she has a new one this week, and um...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLha5zlBQMc

Lots of things going on here, but I can't help zeroing in on the use of an FCUK t-shirt to apparently signify rebellion against "intersectional feminism"

Camaraderie at Arms Length, Monday, 6 February 2017 22:27 (five months ago) Permalink

Was just coming here to post the Ansel track.

insidious assymetrical weapons (Eric H.), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:25 (five months ago) Permalink

abysmal real name of 2017 and hard to see how that track & video will be beaten either

I Am In Atlanta And Thug Is Young (imago), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:34 (five months ago) Permalink

the second one is kinda like beat poetry on a Thursday night at Borders circa 1999

Neanderthal, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:38 (five months ago) Permalink

I don't hate this ansel elgort thing as much as I should

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:41 (five months ago) Permalink

I guess I'll tolerate anything* if it's over a decent synthesizer

* except, like, nazi shit, no one post that buzzfeed article, I've read it

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:43 (five months ago) Permalink

i didn't think it was bad either

Neanderthal, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 03:58 (five months ago) Permalink

um

I Am In Atlanta And Thug Is Young (imago), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 04:08 (five months ago) Permalink

there was an "exposé" a few months about a "burgeoning" "subgenre" of fascist/neo-nazi themed songs over giorgio moroder ripoffs

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 04:15 (five months ago) Permalink

So far nothing in this thread is truly awful.

daavid, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 05:05 (five months ago) Permalink

best/worst thing about the ansel elgort song is his overenunciation of every single word

na (NA), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 15:45 (five months ago) Permalink

i think he learned it phonetically

na (NA), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 15:46 (five months ago) Permalink

as a person who has actually liked a fair number of FJM/J. Tillman things, his decision to double down on po-faced "political" lyrics has resulted in, I believe, some dizzying new lows worthy of this thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BT2-0y1542I

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 15:48 (five months ago) Permalink

That Elgort video is pretty good on mute, cause you know, cute mostly-naked boy + Cocaine Noir visuals.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 17:07 (five months ago) Permalink

I hope his acting is better than his singing, otherwise he might ruin the upcoming Edgar Wright movie that he's starring in.

MarkoP, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 17:14 (five months ago) Permalink

The Elgort song is mostly guilty of trying too hard. It reminds me a bit of that Kiefer Sutherland country track from last year in that regard (although that was way funnier).

Those Fellatia Geisha tracks are just straight up appalling, through. Like Kitty (Pryde) performing lyrics written by Milo Yiannopoulos.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 17:47 (five months ago) Permalink

haha that ansel elgort song is hilariously bad, thread delivers

fjm is annoyingly bad ;_;

niels, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 18:19 (five months ago) Permalink

apparently there's a 13-minute song kicking around but I don't feel up to torturing y'all on that level

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 18:21 (five months ago) Permalink

This is from 2014, but I was just sent it because he's touring:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXYgLPBfF_w

Don Van Gorp, midwest regional VP, marketing (誤訳侮辱), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 23:04 (five months ago) Permalink

At long last, the lead single of a certain animated group's upcoming 4th album. No, not that one:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7A6-WllOSQ

MarkoP, Wednesday, 8 February 2017 23:21 (five months ago) Permalink

This Prozzak song isn't good, but they were probably one of the very last turn-of-the-millennium bands that I would have expected to still be around in 2017, so that's something.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 23:31 (five months ago) Permalink

Well their upcoming album, due in March, is called "Forever 1999".

MarkoP, Thursday, 9 February 2017 17:12 (five months ago) Permalink

wow 2017 shaping up to be worse than last year

wonder if that arthur brown shit is to poor for tom waits to sue

niels, Thursday, 9 February 2017 18:03 (five months ago) Permalink

alternate titles: "Sia Continues To Not Do Subtext"; "I Didn't Expect Melanie Martinez To Be Where Katy Perry Is Being Positioned, Huh"; "If You Told Me Katy Perry Was Doing 'Pleasantville' I Would Have Expected Pinup Shit"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gsGhdZDC-0

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Friday, 10 February 2017 17:30 (five months ago) Permalink

"stumbling around like a wasted zombie" is a great description of whatever the chorus is trying to do

the raindrops and drop tops of lived, earned experience (BradNelson), Friday, 10 February 2017 17:33 (five months ago) Permalink

there's something so awkward about how capitalism/mainstream pop absorbed counterculture in the way it's expressed here - it's like when Dr. Evil does the "i'm hip" routine

worst indeed

niels, Sunday, 12 February 2017 18:48 (five months ago) Permalink

the thing is, it isn't really counterculture at all. it's Sia writing a Sia song that is essentially "Chandelier"

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Sunday, 12 February 2017 19:00 (five months ago) Permalink

I only meant to suggest that criticizing popular culture within a pop framework is awkward when the content of the critique is so banal/superficial/"without any subtext"

it isn't really counterculture - but doesn't it rely on misconstrued countercultural aesthetics?

niels, Sunday, 12 February 2017 19:12 (five months ago) Permalink

imo a song that tells people they are zombies and have to find real purpose in such vague terms is virtually insidistinguishable from telling people to get real jobs and stop watching reality tv

mh 😏, Sunday, 12 February 2017 20:53 (five months ago) Permalink

Fuck, Sia has really dropped off in quality since We are Born - not sure if it's related to her sobering up and doing music 24/7 or the money. Happy for her health-wise I guess.

Everything Moves Towards The Sun (Ross), Monday, 13 February 2017 03:04 (five months ago) Permalink

xp promo otm and a self-indictment

mh 😏, Monday, 13 February 2017 03:44 (five months ago) Permalink

am I horrible if I say sia's best bits were zero 7 vocals

mh 😏, Monday, 13 February 2017 03:45 (five months ago) Permalink

Nope.

how's life, Monday, 13 February 2017 09:51 (five months ago) Permalink

Otoh, "I'm watching porn in my hotel dressing gown" is v Rolling Worst Music 2002.

how's life, Monday, 13 February 2017 12:11 (five months ago) Permalink

(picture of Trump in bathrobe)

mh 😏, Monday, 13 February 2017 14:40 (five months ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRhZFNHrT6c

k3vin k., Wednesday, 22 February 2017 17:05 (four months ago) Permalink

Bryson Morris sings that song / so i don't even bother

removed from the rain drops and drop tops of experience (ulysses), Wednesday, 22 February 2017 18:40 (four months ago) Permalink

I like that he has braces.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 22 February 2017 20:08 (four months ago) Permalink

Dare I stick my head out and admit that I sort of like the Katy Perry song, just a bit put off by the rubbish lyrics and scansion

Camaraderie at Arms Length, Wednesday, 22 February 2017 20:11 (four months ago) Permalink

I cannot get past that Cocorosie/ANHONI song

ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), Wednesday, 22 February 2017 20:17 (four months ago) Permalink

The best thing that I will say about that Perry song is that, after hearing it maybe twice, it doesn't actively annoy me in any way. Other than that, I can't right now recall a single thing about it.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 22 February 2017 20:22 (four months ago) Permalink

Filed under "Machine-gunning fish in a barrel":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hlSgENWCcU

ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), Thursday, 23 February 2017 15:05 (four months ago) Permalink

Jessie Ware co-wrote this. I'm horrified

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwzD8U4u76k

monotony, Sunday, 5 March 2017 00:03 (four months ago) Permalink

Go fuck yourself, Ed.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Sunday, 5 March 2017 00:11 (four months ago) Permalink

there's another video of them at a Tedx talk

global tetrahedron, Monday, 3 April 2017 17:06 (three months ago) Permalink

I don't care if you like the jazz or the violins, the rap automatically elevates it to like worst thing of all time

Neanderthal, Monday, 3 April 2017 17:06 (three months ago) Permalink

did we really need another Carman?

Neanderthal, Monday, 3 April 2017 17:07 (three months ago) Permalink

I'm debating whether to put the Zeal & Ardor song I heard on here. It actually isn't a poorly-done song and works pretty well for what it is, but the story behind the dude's music and the choices he made in putting together makes "Devil Is Fine" the most viscerally-repellent thing I've heard so far this year that wasn't by Drake.

Rachel Luther Queen (DJP), Monday, 3 April 2017 17:09 (three months ago) Permalink

Yeah, this interview is kinda mind-blowing, especially when the interviewer (who posts on ILM very, very, very occasionally) says, "Wait, did I hear that right?"

Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, Jr, and Violent J (誤訳侮辱), Monday, 3 April 2017 18:19 (three months ago) Permalink

Yeah.

Rachel Luther Queen (DJP), Monday, 3 April 2017 18:32 (three months ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1-pKWOt2yM

not sure this strictly qualifies for this thread but I feel like I need to put it somewhere

Vlogs from other credible bands such as Shed Seven (DJ Mencap), Thursday, 6 April 2017 17:44 (three months ago) Permalink

shape of you certainly needed to be here

Bobson Dugnutt (ulysses), Thursday, 6 April 2017 17:58 (three months ago) Permalink

this came out last year but unfortunately it is still terrorizing the airwaves and actually starting to cross over somewhat (from alternative to adult pop radio). unfortunately i've had to hear it a million times b/c some ppl i work w/ for whatever reason actually enjoy the sad state of today's alternative radio.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZXU3vzAmhE

completely abominable.

dyl, Tuesday, 11 April 2017 15:46 (three months ago) Permalink

this is old but i really wanted to share
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tETx284RYFk

Bobson Dugnutt (ulysses), Thursday, 20 April 2017 19:12 (three months ago) Permalink

i can't
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIOaU7Sm-ZE

joshywinty (josh), Friday, 28 April 2017 20:41 (two months ago) Permalink

opened this thread expecting to see katy perry's new single

dyl, Friday, 28 April 2017 20:51 (two months ago) Permalink

bon appétit, dyl!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MH9ilfAZHOs&t=159s

joshywinty (josh), Friday, 28 April 2017 20:52 (two months ago) Permalink

I was personally expecting the new Fall Out Boy single.

MarkoP, Friday, 28 April 2017 21:54 (two months ago) Permalink

yeah i'm waiting for that to make an appearance here (i like it)

ToddBonzalez (BradNelson), Friday, 28 April 2017 21:56 (two months ago) Permalink

three weeks pass...

i was scared i was actually going to like it but nope it's trash

dyl, Friday, 19 May 2017 05:33 (two months ago) Permalink

just gonna leave this here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-wUFRa_hZA

joshywinty (josh), Friday, 19 May 2017 06:08 (two months ago) Permalink

That Frankie Grande inspires more pity than hatred, tbh.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Friday, 19 May 2017 14:35 (two months ago) Permalink

guess who's back

https://youtu.be/vQJwNETuUIM

maura, Friday, 2 June 2017 11:48 (one month ago) Permalink

(it's the karmin chick. she's rebranded.)

maura, Friday, 2 June 2017 13:18 (one month ago) Permalink

the creators of the new Imagine Dragons single should be brought before The Hague.

the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 2 June 2017 13:20 (one month ago) Permalink

xpost - Garg.

As for Imagine Dragons, they already seem so...ancient.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 2 June 2017 13:22 (one month ago) Permalink

I thought I could avoid Imagine Dragons, but that Beliver song keeps popping up in random things like the finale to Riverdale or the Murder on The Orient Express trailer.

MarkoP, Friday, 2 June 2017 14:32 (one month ago) Permalink

yikes at nu-karmin

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Friday, 2 June 2017 15:57 (one month ago) Permalink

My main reaction is "I guess if someone has to take Iggy Azalea's spot, it might as well be this"

PJD PDJ DPJ (DJP), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:01 (one month ago) Permalink

the trump/pence/ryan succession problem

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:03 (one month ago) Permalink

ed sheeran
jax jones
rag n bone man
little mix

i n f i n i t y (∞), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:05 (one month ago) Permalink

I have never been as anti-Karmin as most of the rest of the board (aside from joining in the general "wtf" at "Acapella" and a lot of their pre-fame covers; their hit is tolerable IMO) and, while I don't especially enjoy this song, the technical skill needed to keep up that flow without falling off of the beat or tripping over words is impressive. I'm probably not going to play it again though.

PJD PDJ DPJ (DJP), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:07 (one month ago) Permalink

I never minded "I Want It All." There – I said it.

the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:11 (one month ago) Permalink

I only remember that "cheerio" song, which can fuck right off.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:23 (one month ago) Permalink

no talkin bad 'bout little mix

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 2 June 2017 16:35 (one month ago) Permalink

one month passes...

this arcade fire album is gonna be baaad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UymXRxJPOQo

voodoo chili, Friday, 14 July 2017 14:25 (one week ago) Permalink

the abominable playlist has been fully updated for the half year mark.

ILM's Rolling Worst Music Thread 2017 Spotify Playlist

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Friday, 14 July 2017 14:43 (one week ago) Permalink

i never knew this prizewinner existed until i read a few news stories about him being a shitty neighbor in L.A. but here you go

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSlb1ezRqfA

nomar, Wednesday, 19 July 2017 20:25 (two days ago) Permalink

With something this amateurish, I genuinely feel too sorry for it to fully hate it, but no, this guy and his crew can fuck right off.

some sad trombone Twilight Zone shit (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 19 July 2017 20:31 (two days ago) Permalink

what the fuck was that

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Wednesday, 19 July 2017 20:55 (two days ago) Permalink

he's a youtube star

maura, Thursday, 20 July 2017 06:00 (yesterday) Permalink

70m views

utter shite

niels, Thursday, 20 July 2017 07:47 (yesterday) Permalink

good thread addition

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Thursday, 20 July 2017 11:39 (yesterday) Permalink

It's good that someone's making rap for 80s teen movie villains now.

how's life, Thursday, 20 July 2017 14:49 (yesterday) Permalink

top that

ToddBonzalez (BradNelson), Thursday, 20 July 2017 14:58 (yesterday) Permalink

lol

how's life, Thursday, 20 July 2017 15:16 (yesterday) Permalink

omg Brad

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 20 July 2017 15:30 (yesterday) Permalink

isis is going to kill us all because of that video

nomar, Thursday, 20 July 2017 16:09 (yesterday) Permalink

http://uproxx.com/music/jake-paul-worst-songs-of-2017/3/

na (NA), Thursday, 20 July 2017 16:25 (yesterday) Permalink

so that's what happened to the "i like turtles" kid. sad!

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Thursday, 20 July 2017 16:46 (yesterday) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9phCHjI6cI

this one's worse

ufo, Thursday, 20 July 2017 17:26 (yesterday) Permalink

he has such a deeply stupid face: the deeply inset blank eyes, the slack mouth
he's basically moose from the archie comics

Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Thursday, 20 July 2017 18:34 (yesterday) Permalink


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