THE WORST NME COVER OF ALL TIME

Stuff We Love: You saw the indie luminaries playing it, wearing it, riding it, smoking it, punching it… Now we tell you where to get it

wow, just like cosmo

The new wave of thrash metal feature this week is pricelessly cute, I just want to pick it up and hug it

Pete Doherty - a druggy loser makes another shambolic crap album

http://tinyurl.com/2kyotq

http://img77.imageshack.us/img77/9786/magimageiw0.jpg

that is really depressing.

http://a442.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/01516/14/47/1516937441_l.jpg

Still love this photo, forget who the fuck it's of tho

cheryl tweedy and that other guy.

He's pulling that face because he has a mobile phone in his ass?

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/music/2008/02/music_magazine_covers.html

tl;dr

To this day, I can recite verbatim the opening paragraph of Nick Kent's epic critique.

Thus far and no further.

Amazing how nearly all of the cover photos Wilde cites were taken by the same photographer.

There might be a clue in there somewhere.

Did Lo-Fidelity Allstars ever get a cover? If so, them as well: what a pointless band.

robin could be so hurtful

^^^Dude's posting again, pay attention

!!??

Word(s) that only ever appeared in one (hit) song, ever.

"February Callendar"

o shi

So, I'm back up in the game,
Running things to keep my swing,
Lettin' all the people know,
That I'm back to run the show,
'Cause what they didn't know was wrong,
And all the nasty things you've done,
So, baby, listen carefully,
While I sing my comeback song.

What makes you think that is Robin C, out of curiosity? I don't get it.

he said it was him, didn't he?

Yeah, him saying "I am Robin C" was a bit of a giveaway

I missed that, obv. I'm glad he's back! I like Robin.

thought FC was someone else

Frankly, it's a pity he isn't.

I predict three months before he leaves again and starts posting stupid comments about Oxbridge-educated music writers who like Girls Aloud, the Mod revival, etc., on his own blog, and wonders why certain people don't bother talking to him any more.

http://i10.ebayimg.com/05/i/08/b5/4d/ag_1.JPG

http://www.pickinglosers.co.uk/files/u11/wrestling460.jpg

Ha, I thought at first that FC may be another Marcello pseudonym, with his extensive knowledge of long forgotten 1970 chart hits. Then they started replying to each other.

Yes, I think I'll have to Geirify him.

http://img5.allocine.fr/acmedia/medias/nmedia/18/36/35/66/18629180.jpg

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/135/335792950_c834796cfd_b.jpg

Will the grafter of Italian origin do over the cocky young upstart with the interest in urban music? Stay tuned.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/d/d4/Nme_blur_oasis.jpg/180px-Nme_blur_oasis.jpg

http://www.poster.net/alien-vs-predator/alien-vs-predator-whoever-wins-we-lose-paul-ws-anderson-3700999.jpg

http://www.vinmagarchive.com/thumb.asp?f=NME%202%20JAN%201999(1).jpg&w=275

Ooooh, I'm scared.

Hard to tell which member of Gomez is least intimidating. Far left, probably, though second left's in with a shout.

I still have a theory that the NME was trying to go bankrupt '98-'00.

Aya Napa / Ibiza?...

-- gretnagreen, Sunday, 12 August 2001

Beefa in 2000 was class, best summer of my life!

OK that Gomez one is laughable

Hard to tell which member of Gomez is least intimidating. Far left, probably, though second left's in with a shout.

-- chap, Wednesday, February 13, 2008 8:00 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Link

saw far left guy in waterstones once. weird attempt to cash in on 'lock, stock' imagery (released a few months prior) on that cover.

saw far left guy in waterstones once

Was he polite when he served you?

(I knew far left's sister. Don't think I ever met him tho. She asked me if I thought they'd win the Mercury that year and I made some polite noises and said "well it is a pretty open year".)

looooool

xpost

i was behind the counter as it goes.

Far left looks like every guy who is ever in Waterstones, is the thing - including me, a bit.

Fucking hell, I remember posting to this thread back in my early twenties.

The truth is that I don't like or recognise the person who posted here all that time ago. I'm not sure whether I like myself much, if at all, now, but I'm astonished at how low my regard is for my old self, how little connection I have with him. Much, if not most, of what I posted was pretty much worthless shit (plus ca change, possibly), and I don't think I ever represented myself well, or reflected (with a few exceptions) what I'm actually capable of. I came back on a whim, really (and because I'd fantasised about the 'words in only one hit song' thread in my head years ago, easily-amused as I may be), wondering how long it would take before anyone saw through me. When Marcello did, I thought it was better to admit it immediately rather than play any more games.

Many of the statements I made in the great war with Dom and Nick (which was the moment the bridges burnt) were misjudged, to say the least, and within a few months I had distanced myself from quite a few of them. I am as full of anger at the self-perpetuating nature of the new elite - or as it should be called the New Boy Network - and the way it holds back genuine talent in all fields as anyone else on here, and (I would suspect) more so than many. The difference is that I don't dismiss individuals simply because of their background, as Dom did when he made his grotesquely bigoted remarks about Stephen Fry. I hate the system, but I don't hate people simply because they were born into it (which was not after all their choice). I only hate them when they are artistically worthless, pernicious in their influence and keep out of the mass consciousness those who deserve it far more, c.f. Lily Allen and her hellspawn. None of those descriptions apply to Stephen Fry. Of course there is a residual Old Toryism in the It's a Soaraway Life sketch (which, along with all the other strongly anti-Murdoch / anti-US-influence ones, I suspect was much more Fry than Laurie). But there are also principles that are bigger and stronger than any forum factions, and we are risking all our futures if we cannot see them through our own petty agendas.

I may well be more conservative than I want to be. But there is a fervent radical's heart beating here as well. In the age of Sarkozy and the horrendous Milliband, I feel I am needed more than ever. It would be betrayal for me to be anything else.

I think I'll keep this name from now on. I prefer it.

For what it matters (very little), the Brel article in the 1986 NME whose cover appears upthread - and that is probably their last great cover (though I agree with Mark about the font at the bottom) - was by Momus. As for continuing to add new covers to this thread, for me it's like worrying about people who still wear bowler hats. The NME is the rock'n'roll (kill the Krauts, kill the Arabs) old-guard hangover. But the system in which it's a miniscule pawn deserves all the abuse we can throw at it, and more.

Lily Allen has never praised the comedy stylings of Bernard Manning, though?

I sigh, and then I cry, and I wonder why...

Bernard Manning to Peter Cook on the Joan Rivers show: "You used to be very funny Peter." Then to camera: "He can't remember his lines you see. I work every night."

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/202/522514950_bfb448770a.jpg

nothing can beat this for sheer disgustingness

http://kscakes.com.nyud.net:8080/LolCats/Uploads/Saved/in-ur-cricket-team-hatin-ur-jewz.jpg

hating your fatty jowls morelike