rolling #metoo thread for sexual harassment in the music industry so no one misses out when artists we don't give a fuck about like Tim Westwood and Bassnectar get caught

(And not that I’m saying anyone it happens to should go running to the cops, but the fact that there are a significant number of guys who would go doing that at all… oy)

I LOATHE an unsolicited dick pic, your boner can wait the minute it takes to ask "can I send an explicit picture" and receive a reply, and anyone who isn't willing to do that work is someone I will assume is bad at consent and should stay away from.

― boxedjoy, Monday, August 29, 2022 5:11 PM bookmarkflaglink

otm. ffs even if you can't wait, just take the boner pic and dont' SEND it until you get the consent.

xpost my girlfriend at the time said the cops basically laughed at her and said block the number.

I attempted to find the guy and believed I had located the identity of the person myself through one of those reverse lookup sites but she didn't want to spend any more energy on it. esp since I wasn't 100% confident.

that was 13 years ago, nowadays it'd probably be easier to identify the dick

reversedicklookup.com etc etc

even a decade ago when I was single and online dating, not a day would go by where I wouldn't log in to any account and find an unsolicited nude in my inbox. My pals who date men all talk about how they would never open a dating app on public transport now.

omg reversedicklookup.com should exist ... honestly, that would be a great use for AI

must register your dick on the national dick database.

commercials with LL Cool J saying "c'mon, you gotta register your car if you use it, why not your joint too?"

reversedicklookup requires incredible focus, practice and strength but imo it's a waste to make a whole website about just one dicktrick - there are so many others

I LOATHE an unsolicited dick pic, your boner can wait the minute it takes to ask "can I send an explicit picture" and receive a reply, and anyone who isn't willing to do that work is someone I will assume is bad at consent and should stay away from.

― boxedjoy,

A guy I've been seeing intermittently for months will send private Instagram messages of his cock and rim jobs and -- it grosses me out? He's also much younger, probably unaware of the impression he makes. It's partially my fault for tolerating it.

omg reversedicklookup.com should exist ... honestly, that would be a great use for AI

― sarahell, Monday, August 29, 2022 5:29 PM (eleven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

sarah, don't give that idea away for free.

I hear of guys who do this and I just wanna ask them how often it actually works for them. Obviously you would never get a truthful answer. But I would think that sending an unsolicited dick pic to a girl you are NOT already seeing has a success rate of like, less than 0.1%. in fact I would not be surprised to find out that it has never worked in the entirety of human history. there is, however, a significant chance she sends it to your Mom or your boss

similar to catcalling it is not intended to "work" it is just an assertion of power

exactly

it’s the same principle as flashing - the dude is getting off on the act of forcing the viewer’s gaze & being seen period, esp unwillingly

it’s nothing at all to do with “luring a mate” or whatever

yeah, I don't imagine there are too many forlorn looking "man in the yellow hat" type folk who sit on their couch after their fiftieth unsuccessful dick pic pickup attempt, and sigh to George "I guess they're just not that into me!"

Brad and VG otm

my cousin will do this thing where if she's in a club and a guy starts to dance against her or similar she will just shout at him as loud as possible "oh you grope like a pro, ram it in then" and it has never failed to scare a guy away. Obviously that's not a strategy for everyone to use, my cousin is a very strong confident woman in situations where it's understandable other people may not be, but it is clearly about power and intimidation.

_
omg reversedicklookup.com should exist ... honestly, that would be a great use for AI

― sarahell, Monday, August 29, 2022 5:29 PM (eleven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink_


sarah, don't give that idea away for free.

it’s nothing at all to do with “luring a mate” or whatever

Like an anglerfish? Wait, that's a meal, not a mate.

I’m shook to learn this is a common occurrence.

I've never even been on a dating site, but i have a public twitter acct with DMs open for reporting tips, and even then occasionally, I get other kinds of tips instead. or comments about my profile pic. just the price of existing as a woman-presenting person on the internet.

just the price of existing as a woman-presenting person on the internet.

― Roz

Happens to all queer folx, too, regardless of gender presentation. Our identities are sexualised and objectified.

yes, absolutely

Two years ago -- "[I] have been completely inappropriate to women," Ian Svenonius (Nation of Ulysses, The Make-Up, etc) writes in a new statement: https://brooklynvegan.com/ian-svenonius-i-have-been-completely-inappropriate-to-women/

This past weekend - Two years later Ian Svenonius & fellow filmmaker Alexandra Cabral did Aug 26 and Aug 27 chats w/ a showing of their film The Lost Record @ AFI Silver Spring , near Washington DC

I saw a couple of IG posts from someone asserting that his apology wasn't good enough, and that his behavior needed to be punished and his blocking of people on social media who challenged him should not be ignored

omg reversedicklookup.com should exist ... honestly, that would be a great use for AI

― sarahell, Monday, August 29, 2022 5:29 PM (yesterday)

I read a paper a while ago about a team of engineers training an AI to recognize porn imagery. Since they were nearly all straight men on the team, the AI didn't even register full on dicks as nudity, just breasts and vulvas

After I was dragged in this thread for not understanding the power dynamics of these relationships, I went ahead and read the Alexandra Brodsky book referenced in the Pitchfork article and it was very good. I should confess that the screenshots also helped.

I read a paper a while ago about a team of engineers training an AI to recognize porn imagery. Since they were nearly all straight men on the team, the AI didn't even register full on dicks as nudity, just breasts and vulvas

I’d love to read this if you have time to find it. A coworker in my lab works on research related to these problems.

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1527476416680453

(apologies if my memory sanded off some of the nuances)

Thanks!

fwiw here is an insightful essay on masculinity that starts off by "reading" dick pics

https://thebaffler.com/latest/dicks-pics-dark-rooms-nathan

Pretty sure Svenonius deleted his account shortly after making his statement. For one, his statement was undermined off the bat as he wrote it in his florid style which made it kind of seem like one of his usual bits (maybe he can only express himself that way, but still, dropping his usual style might have made it seem a bit more like he was making an honest go at it). But yeah, doing so then promptly disappearing himself does not exactly suggest he did any "work" but who knows?

Svenonius has been back on Instagram for awhile , but the only comments on any posts are ones offering compliments. Am guessing he is still deleting and blocking ones that bring up his past.

Ooof well yeah not following him but that sounds not so great.

Ugh, someone on another forum says we should brace ourselves for forthcoming allegations about another prominent Canadian indie artist. I won't say his name yet until it happens - FWIW, it's a different band - but supposedly a national Canadian newspaper has been working on the story for some time.

Not Ed Robertson?

Ugh

Does the band have lots of members, or just the standard number?

This may give it away but it has lots of members, albeit a wildly fluctuating number of them.

The poster said the source is rock solid but he didn't identify the news organization...so I guess don't rush to judgment yet but brace yourselves for the possibility.

If it's the same rumor I saw, the lots of members option.

can't believe there's still no reporting on the Timber Timbre allegations
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Broken Social Scene? New Pornographers?

Am I just imagining there's an effort to not 'sully' the Arcade Fire thread with discussions of sexual misconduct? Seems like that conversation belongs in their thread and not just in the generic 'which artists are raping bastards' thread.

Let's just say the one with a (possibly) unfortunately titled track #7 on a breakthrough record.

I don't know any more than that, or what the specific accusations are, but I'm confident I saw the same "source is rock solid" note as birdistheword.

another forum? I'm not buying it

omg the speculation can it stop?!

This is starting to feel disturbingly like an anticipation thread

Put it in 77 you lame

assuning paulie has some terrible opinions on this subject i'd prefer were not elaborated

Not at all. I'm disgusted every time these stories break, whether I care about the artist or not. I'm just not giddy about the prospect of hearing about more of them.

The first time I saw Neko Case, opening for Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, she said, from the stage, she would make out with the first person who bought merch.

CBC spokesperson confirms in a statement that CBC Music is pulling Arcade fire music. 'In light of the recent allegations against Win Butler, CBC Music will pause on playing Arcade Fire's music until we learn more about the situation.' BG: https://t.co/EyUy5Hjjkm
.

— CBC News Alerts (@CBCAlerts) August 30, 2022

xp what's your point

Please don't be Dan Bejar

My point is that speculation is absurd.