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The real question is surely why hasn't Paul McCartney recorded a crap duet with Madonna to complete the set

A cover of 'Lady Madonna', with Lourdes and Rocco on guest vocals.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:19 (twenty-one years ago)

With "Parklife" style mockney dialogue by Guy Ritchie

― Serghei Daduismus (Dada), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Quite why this hasn't happened I cannot fathom.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:21 (twenty-one years ago)

because the wrongness quota was already reached with the little rap in 'American Life' and Macca's latest single respectively

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Stevie Wonder had a considerably bigger duet hit in the late '80s with Julio Iglesias - the gloopy MoR of "My Love." His own commercial status was waning, which was a shame because Characters is an underrated album and something like a return to his old form.

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:36 (twenty-one years ago)

(bear in mind that this was a period where it was practically illegal to have a number one single in Britain unless you were Kylie or Jason or Jive Bunny)

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Or preferably all three.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:41 (twenty-one years ago)

(why did Jive Bunny never do a duet with anyone?)

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:42 (twenty-one years ago)

the scag made him hostile and untrusting of others

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you saying Jive Bunny chased the dragon and got smacked?

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 11:58 (twenty-one years ago)

well that sort of far-fetched scenario would be enough to drive anyone to heroin wouldn't it

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 12:03 (twenty-one years ago)

You can jive a bunny to smack but you can't make him shoot up.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 12:17 (twenty-one years ago)

In a mildly unrelated thing, I read that Minnie Driver was part of a trio, called "Smoke, Rocks and Brown" i mean, WTF?

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 12:30 (twenty-one years ago)

The Bruce Springsteen segment was all about how great he was in the 70's and then Henry Rollins saying that he was mass-merch packaged when Born in the USA came out.

And my wife and I both finished Minnie Drvier's sentence for her when she said, "When that album came out, I was so _____." ("young"|"seven")

what a horrible show.

― dave225 (Dave225), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 12:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I saw the last half hour. Of course it's a shit programme, it's on Channel 4, a channel that's gone so downmarket that Burberry wouldn't advertise on it.

All this being said, the correct answer is so clearly Prince that it doesn't need thinking about.

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Tuesday, 19 October 2004 18:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Pre-'In The Closet', MJ liked to refer to Madonna as a "heiffer" who couldn't sing and danced okay. He also got rejected by Prince for 2 duets - one sharing vocals on 'We Are The World' and then Bad as mentioned upthread. Apparently, MJ wanted to play an "are they friends or enemies" publicity game with Prince in on it and then releasing the duet song/video (with song-and-dance-offs present). Prince wasn't up for it even when Quincy set up a couple of meetings between them where they just had stare-offs instead.

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 09:51 (twenty-one years ago)

supposedly quincy was also trying to get MJ to look at prince's workrate to inspire him to work quicker. he thought some of that might rub off from prince onto MJ.

― splooge (thesplooge), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 09:54 (twenty-one years ago)

"Can you imagine me doing a song like ['Jack U Off']?"

"Not really, Michael."

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Apparently, Prince brought "voodoo charms" to one of their meetings.

BTW, is it too late for me to call Madonna a 2nd-rate heiffer?

― B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 10:02 (twenty-one years ago)

might rub off from prince onto MJ

i saw that out of context and now i've got a really vivid and not entirely pleasant mental image. the juxtaposition with the word "splooge" hasn't helped either. eew.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Wednesday, 20 October 2004 20:48 (twenty-one years ago)

three weeks pass...

So, the answers are in:

Blah, blah, blah fluff piece from BBCOnline

To summarise though:

90s - Robbie Williams
80s - Michael Jackson
70s - Queen
60s - Rolling Stones
50s - Cliff Richard

The words "as voted for by the sort of people who vote in these things" springs to mind, although the 10 they had to choose from in each decade were uninspired mostly.

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:00 (twenty-one years ago)

stupid fucking country

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Christ, that is horrific. Queen for the 70s?!!?!?!

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Robbie Williams and Cliff Richard - bookends or what?

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Cliff is far more tolerable - what is Cliff's actual ratio of good songs to bad songs do you think?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Very low I'd say. Not that he didn't have a few.

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:07 (twenty-one years ago)

They're all fucking pantomime acts.

― NickB (NickB), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:10 (twenty-one years ago)

And I don't mean they're shafting donkeys.

― NickB (NickB), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Well it is wacky old "He's behind you! Where? There!" Britain voting

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:11 (twenty-one years ago)

i know it's the most cliched thing ever (apart from the man himself) to moan about how over-rated Robbie Williams is in this country, but still - WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU BRITAINLAND?

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:11 (twenty-one years ago)

We like a trouper, Gawd bless 'em. Queen Mother came down 'ere during the Blitz. Nice cup o' Rosie Lee, luv?

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Britain loves losers, can't handle genuinely talented people as winners, shockah

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:15 (twenty-one years ago)

This is the country where Michael Barrymore and Ant & Dec have been described, at one point or another, as "national treasures"

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:17 (twenty-one years ago)

I think Cliff is possibly the closest to being right, although quite how seriously you can take a 50s poll that excludes Hank Williams as a voting option is another matter.

Actually, scratch that - I just checked his official discography and there's only 5 singles and two album of (mainly) covers in the 50s. Aside from "Move It", the singles are pretty patchy. I had always assumed "Lucky Lips" was earlier than 1963.

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Hate to be rockist here, but shoulda been Chuck Berrry

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:20 (twenty-one years ago)

That's a funny way to spell Karlheinz Stockhausen.

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 12 November 2004 13:24 (twenty-one years ago)

The winners do all get interred in some sort of mausoleum as part of the ceremony though don't they? That might explain the voting.

Nice to see our Cliff beat off all nine septics for his place. Colostomy bag and all.

― NickB (NickB), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:25 (twenty-one years ago)

HE WAS WAITING FOR A TUBE AT MILE END THE MONEY WAS ONLY RESTING IN HIS ACCOUNT

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 12 November 2004 13:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Eh? He certainly caught a tube up one end I hear.

― NickB (NickB), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Chuck Stockhausen OR Karlheinz Berry - it's an injustice, I tell ya

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

their recently unearthed collaboration is a gem

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I see nobody is debating the Rolling Stones for the 60s. And quite right too. Mad not to have given them an automatic, along with the Beatles.

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

The Rolling Stones? That's a strange way of spelling John Coltrane.

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 12 November 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I think Cliff is possibly the closest to being right, although quite how seriously you can take a 50s poll that excludes Hank Williams as a voting option is another matter.
Actually, scratch that - I just checked his official discography and there's only 5 singles and two album of (mainly) covers in the 50s. Aside from "Move It", the singles are pretty patchy. I had always assumed "Lucky Lips" was earlier than 1963.
-- aldo_cowpat (aldo.cowpa...) (webmail), November 12th, 2004. (link)

Hey, if Robbie Williams had been put in the fifties' category, he'd have won that!

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

James Brown influence arguably as great if not greater - guess he didn't sell as many records tho

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Fill this in:

"Wow, xxx won the xx'ties? That's a real surprise!"

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:36 (twenty-one years ago)

It was a toss up between U2 and Keiji Haino for the 90s, a moody old twat dressed in black with rock 'n' roll shades and Bono

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:37 (twenty-one years ago)

If Robbie Williams' dad had been put in the 50s category, he'd have won it.

But that says more about YER AVERAGE MUG PUNTER than anything else, I think.

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

If Robbie Williams had been put in the "Best England Footballer Of Last 100 Years" category he would have won.

Bizarrely, James Brown has only ever had one top ten single in Britain - "Living In America."

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 12 November 2004 13:39 (twenty-one years ago)

And in the sixties, he had a hit with "It's a daft daft daft world".

Or was that the other James Brown?

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 12 November 2004 13:40 (twenty-one years ago)

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