pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

a little mini soulja boy living inside us all, turning his swag on

turn my swag inward

i liked the mingus reissue review: "I'm sure I'm not versed enough in jazz to assess what it is that makes Mingus Mingus": great, why are u reviewing album then loser

^^^ lol

haha i noticed that one too

"I've never really listened to music before, but"

There are plenty of times when I value good writing and insight over expertise. Certainly expertise is frequently a prerequisite for insight, but too much demand is placed on critics to be authoritative, IMO.

Great reviews can come from people who are relative outsiders to the topic and can bring a fresh perspective. Noone really needs more jazz reviews from rock fans who are out of their element, though.

The jawdropping part of that Mingus review is when he reveals that the bonus material on the CD is in PDF format. What the?

the worst part of that review is the lede.

chuckle a pitying chuckle, sing your own kind of song

i don't really read the track reviews cause i look at the list and it's just like:

7
6
5
6
7
7

maybe you should just tell me if a track is worth hearing or not--better than being like "pre-existing fans of this artist will want to listen to this track" which is very oh wow thanks a lot for letting me know.

true

my singles reviews have been like 3, 4, 8, 9

the 3 i actually gave a one but they said there has to be a basement

haha--i want to read now what did u give a 3 to?

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11149-lark-on-my-go-kart/

No lie: The beat on Lark On My Go-Kart is the only reason the Asher album got a #1.5 instead of a #1 from me.

fucking loved that review xp

nice louis logic ref

asher roth is not the basement?

OK I'm taking a gander at their "Best New Singles" list and I think it's great that they have singles reviews again, and it's also great that they let you download/stream the song so you can hear it for yourself, but man these songs are all SO ABSOLUTELY FUCKING AWFUL!! This "Hang around baby baby we'll bake a cake for you" song is right up there with "Do the Helen Keller" on my worst songs of the year list, and they give it a nine out of ten!! I do like the Kobe Bryant rap song, though.

mr. snrub being a fan of the lil wayne kobe bryant rap is yet another twist in the mythology of this oddly dull character

that said i agree abt the vooodoo city song, if i may challops shit is totally bland indie-bait

asher roth is not the basement?

― swag serf (J0rdan S.), Wednesday, June 17, 2009 8:52 PM (44 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

just imagine

actually real talk i think its more bland than offensive so yeah a 3 was fair

Yeah Asher is more lame than unlistenable

Asher's pretty awful, guys. I'd put him right up there with Crazy Town and Kottonmouth Kings and Bad Ronald for rap-related douchebaggery

crazy town 'butterfly' >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.....asher roth!!

if i was w pfork when it dropped, i would give butterfly an '8'

i watched that attack attack video tonight and that's a hell of a lot closer to the basement than asher

i would even put brokencyde above asher.

pretty much the only rap things worse than Asher is like MC Lars or Totally Michael

i would DEF put "attack attack" over asher

would much rather watch attack attack than asher. maybe its kind of car wreck-y, but its at least engaging

i would even put mickey avalon over asher probably

shd i try to review attack attack??

YES

might be too much like an internet meme review ...

was at to post:

i think all the attack attack baiting is trying to force a meme. It's just boring metalcore with a dumb dance bridge

guys i've been thinking abt it and can't find the silver lining on attack attack. it's too emo to be campy, even the trance breakdown.

whiney it felt worse than that, what can i say

no i genuinely like watching attack attack. its a pretty weird frankenstein monster of a song. if i actually reviewed metal & went thru a 'popism' phase instead of reviewing rap having gone thru a 'popism' phase i might go for it

feel much more adept @ reviewing crazytown

its a pretty weird frankenstein monster of a song

in all seriousness i admire your positive spin on "these guys are so lazy and awful they can't be bothered/don't know how to write a fucking transition between two parts."

no reason they should have to per se

I am feeling Attack Attack's adderalle'd 'fuck a transition' spin...

'adderall'

mc chris is worth than asher

woulda thoughtby now you guys woulda maybe downgraded from asher alert code red to at least code orange after his first week numbers came in and his 2nd single flopped -- i mean i think we can chill now and dedicate our energies to hating on other 'xxl freshmen' that still have career prospects

i have my scope on ace hood