pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

I don't know if I ever posted about this on the board or whatever, but when James Blake emerged I was kind of struck by how much we looked alike, and I was resentful that he was younger and more successful than me (based off the back of two singles that were both covers), and, later, resentful of his obvious talent and the fact that he is a good four inches taller than me, and, later, resentful of the fact that my current boyfriend clearly has a crush on him

Anyway back in 2011, around when he first emerged, we were both scheduled to play the Donau Festival in Austria. I was watching Ben Frost play his set and I noticed that James Blake was standing right next to me. I sized him up and was like "wow he really does look like a dreamier, taller version of me" but I was too shy to just go up and be like "HI!" so I just stood there and kept watching the Ben Frost set.

I don't remember if it was the same day or the next day, but James and I had both played our sets at that point, and I was crossing the festival grounds. These two young people came up to me and were like "omg! your set was so amazing" thank you thank you "you're my musical hero!" thank you thank you "could you sign records for us?!" of course of course, and then they hand me two James Blake records for me to sign. These kids thought I was James Blake.

So I signed them. I don't remember anymore what I signed on one of them, but I do remember what I signed on the other: "Hello -- keep on not knowing about your dreams! <3 JB"

that's so awesome

lmao

Amazing, but I kinda wish you'd signed "love, James Blunt. PS your beautiful :)"

goon, you've got the start of a Soderbergh picture right there

ty ty

The other one was something like "To Gert - there's NO limit to my love, for you, yours truly, James" but I can't remember exactly

this is off topic fgti but i keep meaning to mention that you have a piece that my partner's Youth Choir (she's the choir manager) is gonna perform that i'm looking forward to hearing
you gonna be at that gig?

I think so, gonna fly down for it. Have you looked at the piece? It's really fun. I can't wait to see the look on all the parents' faces when their children are screaming:

We care not for social justice.
It is a sissy-mead.
We care not for reparations.
The poor insult us with their greed.

haven't seen/heard it yet. i have never heard the term "sissy-mead", where's that from?

Poetic license, I assume. It works!

anyways, will try to look you up! Maybe get you better pottery than i gave ya prior.

I wrote the libretto with a friend/poet and that phrase was his suggestion! I love it! Sissy-mead! Kind of some Ancient Grecian version of snowflake-water or something

i love that story fgti

Great story.

The Fork is into toxic masculinity these days?

― pomenitul, Thursday, January 24, 2019 6:53 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they gave it 7.4

― We were never Breeting Borting (President Keyes)

i'll admit to never having fully understood their rating scale but this seems to me to be absolutely inappropriately high

if they don't want to make a statement and give it 0.0, you know, that's fine, but toxic masculinity should get a 2.4 at most

unless we're talking about the cressida ep "toxic masculinity", and even then man that record just isn't that great, i'd give it a 5.2 at most, cressida were definitely better in their '60s prog-rock phase and haven't adapted well to techno

I think it gets that score due to its "historical significance" rather than whether it was ever actually good.

I think we're talking about the Airborne Toxic Masculinity.

It's one of those things where you had to be there.

Toxic Masculinity didn't sell many records, but everyone who bought one went out and started a Reddit thread

hahaha

i've read/checked the site every day for over a decade and will have no problem stopping once it goes behind a paywall. i haven't really minded the degradation/homogenization of the site, it's been a long time since I discovered a band I loved via p4k, doesn't feel like a loss.

― flappy bird, Wednesday, January 23, 2019 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I don’t tend to discover bands via Pitchfork—honestly can’t remember the last time that happened, though it didn’t happen in the past. These days I tend to discover things through other channels—recommendations here or on Twitter or going down Spotify rabbit holes. But I still routinely check Pitchfork to see what they said about anything I do find. So I guess they ceased being my trainspotter a long time ago but they still are a kind of... validator? I hesitate to use that word but there it is.

yeah I can't remember the last time I learned of a new act from them, it's been a long time. tbf I have read a lot of their reviews about things I was previously unaware of but they all sucked/were not my thing lol

yeah

last band I got really into that was p4k-endorsed was Girlpool, but I didn't discover them via the site.

Grateful to Pitchfork since I am no longer able to rely solely on mainstream media to inform me of such singular and spellbinding talents as Ariana Grande and Greta Van Fleet

Last artist I got into that was endorsed by Pitchfork was probably that Floating Points album.

i am thankful to pitchfork for giving some hype to the beths. i absolutely loved that album

The combination of humor and gloom helped set the scene’s mood as much as any Big Muffed guitar sound. There is an earworm catchiness to even the most nihilistic romps, like “Smilin’ and Dyin’” (“Misery loves company, baby/That’s why I love you”) and, most indelibly, Arm’s defiant refrain during Rehab Doll’s “Swallow My Pride.” “This ain’t the summer of love!” he wails, presaging the wagon-circling to come as bands and labels and media outlets would very soon saturate the city, thinking it some sort of countercultural utopia.

I guess nobody told this guy that the chorus to "Swallow My Pride" is stolen from Blue Öyster Cult.

They just gave my little self released Bandcamp album much love - and I'm a nobody compared to most folks they write about. I'm stoked.

nice! link?

Sure! Here it is. https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/jorge-velez-roman-birds/

Ha! I've been enjoying that this weekend after reading Sherburne's review (he's p much the only reviewer of whom I read all reviews). Great work man!

Thank you! Yeah, it was an honor and surprise when that review went up.

(also, great cover!) xp

This is great - thanks for the heads-up and congratulations on the review.

Congratulations CJV!!

Thanks, fellow ILM peoples :)

I guess nobody told this guy that the chorus to "Swallow My Pride" is stolen from Blue Öyster Cult.

lol this got amended

they probably stole it from BÖC but "this ain't the summer of love" is actually a cover
https://dangerousminds.net/comments/this_aint_the_summer_of_love_the_proto_punk_screamer_covered_by_boec_and_cu

Sure! Here it is. https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/jorge-velez-roman-birds/

― So, This Leaked (Capitaine Jay Vee), Monday, January 28, 2019 7:47 AM (three days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hey this is really cool, enjoying it!

pitchfork is smart! (#000000000000000000000001 in a series.)

JV, that is outstanding. Well done!

xp

When I read that low-number James Blake review I thought

1) It's entirely farcical to label his fourth full length album as "suffocating(ly) serious" and bogged down with too many ballads as if it's now a *bad* thing when all his records completely like that (and I like James Blake)
2) The low number would ultimately more beneficial at this point in his career than a 7 point something; talk about rallying the troops/existing fanbase

good on Blake for sniping p4k on their own terms with that note

While very well written, this review leaves the impression that the reviewer only listened to the album once (which probably isn’t true, and the conceit seems to “work,” but it’s definitely an unusual approach): https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/alice-coltrane-journey-in-satchidananda/

https://pitchfork.com/thepitch/best-and-worst-songs-nominated-grammys-2019/
I’m gonna skip the “This Is America” drag that’ll probably set off a few angry tweets among whatever percentage of Pfork’s readership still looks at The Pitch and weirdly come to the defense of Above & Beyond, who at least deserve to not get mixed up with the song they’re nominated for

And obviously this is a piece with multiple writers, most of it’s fine etc. etc.

Above & Beyond, who at least deserve to not get mixed up with the song they’re nominated for

lol, who are The Suburbs?

finally checked the thread for the first time in a while, buying CJV's album now!

i too love Carly Jae Vepsen.

Creta Jan Vleet

where were your "jokes" one week ago, I ask you