Times you have made an ass out of yourself irl with music

I’ve never heard of those songs

I met RM at a thing a few years back, and was a little disappointed in his ‘tude. He was “friendly” but a bit supercilious...

Not me, but a friend of mine used to work in a record store, and his coworker was getting heavily into Can, Neu!, Faust, and Cluster. One day the coworker waited on some German tourists and excitedly asked them, "HEY, DO YOU GUYS LIKE KRAUTROCK?" The German tourists were very confused and possibly offended.

And You Bird Can Sing is a pretty deep cut.

xp Oh, I love stuff like that. I was at a dinner recently where a younger Swedish guy was being pompous, so I decided to subtly troll him by asking his opinion of ABBA. (Of course, it turned out he mainly liked “dance music”... he asked me if I like ABBA, and I said, “Everyone likes ABBA!”)

I wouldn’t normally pull that, but it was time to amuse myself in that scenario.

hanging out backstage at an Urg@ 0verkill show, two friends have pot they intend to sell to band. take hit of friend A’s and momentarily blackout, knees buckling.

the band goes with friend A’s stuff.

my knees hurt for weeks and friend B gives me a hard time to this day.

In high school, a friend and I were at a Pizza Hut and some person or persons played “Love Shack”, which I hated at the time, two or three times on the jukebox. On our way out we put five dollars in the jukebox and played “Kokomo” twenty times.

^^There’s a fantastic John Mulaney bit called “The Salt and Pepper Diner” with a similar theme.

did that with Sister Ray at the Plaza in Madison when CD jukeboxes where a new thing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnkrL42R7gk

xps I know And Your Bird Can Sing (I do like that song) but I'm drawing a blank on You Won't See Me tbh. I'm not a Beatles fan really. Occasionally I even tell them to fuck off.

I thought "Let My Love Open the Door" was a Kinks song for years! Feel like you should get half-credit, LL

first time i heard beach house i thought it was a dude singing ;-(

I did too. Until just now.

lol

Just remembered the time I went to a Calvin Johnson show circa 2013. There were maybe 50 people there. He told a story about playing in a bar in the deep south. "Very redneck place... a man came up to me. They were playing '1999.' The man told me in a drawl, 'PLAY RASPBERRY BERET!'... to which I said, 'my friend, 'Raspberry Beret' is the whitest Prince song there is.'" Then I BOOOOOOED very loudly.... crickets.... I yelled "'RASPBERRY BERET' RULES!" ..... silence.... no one else booed.... I left 5 minutes later.

That's a time you were OTM about music and Calvin Johnson made an ass of himself.

I know, I know. It was late anyway.

I was at Napalm Death and when I'm drunk sometimes I yell "Hail Satan" at shows, which is annoying. but usually at shows that make sense, like Deicide. so I did it at Napalm Death and Barney's like "Hail Sata....what?", and my friend told me to shut up.

but then someone shouted something pro-Trump a moment later (it was merely two weeks after the election) and he was spared my ire. then my friend alerted Barney that his fly was open, saving little Barney from a cameo.

*I was spared his ire

i think calvin johnson overheard me make fun of him for wearing the big over-ear ear protectors at a show
i think one of the guys from q and not u overheard me make fun of how he was dressed (i guarantee i was dressed like shit while mocking him to my friends)

I did also once interrupt MC Hammer in the middle of a speech in 2009, where he started a chant that went

"I AM" - crowd: "Hammer"!

and on the third time, screamed "broke!", and the crowd around me erupted. the only time I've ever heckled at a show, mostly cos he was putting in a garbage performance, half-assed

Probably daily tbh

An old roommate of mine (ca 2003) was playing a record and it sounded good, after 3 or 4 songs I said "I like this, who is it?"
She says "This is the White Album by the Beatles???????????????"
me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Lol

Asked a high fidelity clerk (that kind) why he didn’t play John Fahey in the store. He laughed and saiid cuz everyone would buy it

lol that would make pretty good movie dialog

Scene; An 'indie disco' in small town North of England, summer 1992

Me (to local DJ) Alright mate who's this song by *gestures at speakers*, is it Gallon Drunk?
Local DJ: No it's *glances at my Morrissey T.shirt*.. Morrissey
Me *GAAH*

FIN

Me, In Germany, to venue worker at after-show club night: "Is this music schlager?"
Her: "No, it's house."

Thus proving that I don't know the difference.

Once had a heated, stand up, righteous argument that in the air bass episode of Alan Partridge he was miming to a Japan song and not a Gary Numan song, oops.

I bet there's some schlager/house crossovers.

i lost a fiver to my friend in a bet because I said Feist's version of 'Limit To Your Love' was a cover of James Blake. I think I was getting mixed up with that Jose Gonzales cover of 'Heartbeats'

i want to know which morrissey track, piscesx!

During my senior year of college a cute neighbor knocked on my door and told me turn down my music. I was playing ‘Our House’ and ‘Burning Down The House’ on repeat for at least an hour.

Me, In Middle America to DJ at shitty hipster club: "Is this dubstep"
Her: "No, there'sa coffee machine malfunctioning in the kitchen"

Me: i'd like to suck on some of that

During my senior year of college a cute neighbor knocked on my door and told me turn down my music. I was playing ‘Our House’ and ‘Burning Down The House’ on repeat for at least an hour.

lol i was gonna say i had a neighbor like that during the 1 year i lived in a college dorm who listened to songs on repeat and i had to ask him to stop.
songs included:
Sarah McLachlan "Possession"
Corey Hart "Sunglasses at Night"
Depeche Mode "Personal Jesus"

we slept separated only by a cinderblock wall
i thought i was going to lose my mind

listened to songs on repeat and i had to ask him to stop.
songs included:
Sarah McLachlan "Possession"

this is me whoops

In the late ‘90s, I was riding the NYC subway; a large, stony-faced guy was sitting next to me, staring straight ahead, with hip-hop beats leaking out from beneath his headphones. Normally, I would never speak to a stranger on the subway (who would?) — but these beats sounded so cool, so exotic, I had to know what he was listening to!

I timidly tapped the fellow on the shoulder; he lifted one headphone and looked over at me.

“Uh, hey man... what are you listening to?”

He mumbled something in response I couldn’t make out. “Sorry?,” I asked.

He repeated himself, just a bit louder —

“Puff Daddy.”

incredible

Very shortly after I started buying music on vinyl, I went to Gramophone Records in Chicago - an institution in the city and for house music djs - I picked out a stack of pretty good finds, mostly underground things that the (intimidating) guy working there approvingly started chatting with me about for a bit. I brought them over to the listening station and put one of the 12"s on but the dial (knob?) of the turntable had come off and, rookie I was, I didn't know how to switch it on. I had a brief moment of panic before I pretended to fuss around with it, drawing the guy's attention. I then put on the headphones and pretended to listen to it (it wasn't spinning, but I didn't care, kind of nodded my head to a pretend beat) for a few seconds. I then pretended to fuss with it some more, then really nonchalantly took out my phone pretending to check stuff. After another few seconds the guy walked over and really kindly - without making too much of it - leaned in and flicked it on, bringing the turntable to life.

It was very awkward. I ended up buying a couple of extra things out of embarrassment. He was very nice about it though.

I've had so many days of shame and terror, it's hard to pick out one.

Playing live in bands, I do seem to have a knack for completely fxxxing up my instrument on a show, usually right literally at the first note of a set. I had a strap break, which led to me playing half the set on my back and then ending up in some type of duct tape night mare... I have had the top string on my bass snap twice right after starting a tune, at least once on the very first note of a gig. Ran into a stage diver on stage playing a punk show (with Avail and Split Lip) and had my bass tuning key fly back and cut my face nearly taking out an eye. Although that one was pretty cool as this borrowed white Pbass ended up with a bunch of blood on it, which was pretty OG.

Around 2010 Tom Tom Club booked a tour and I bought a ticket to see them a few weeks in advance. On the appointed evening I showed up with my ticket and stood toward the back through a band that was playing uncomfortably familiar music and which seemed to be going on much too long for an opening act. The crowd seemed too young and bore the wrong cultural signifiers (Hot Topic, let's say) for TTC fans. But I just stood there and endured the whole thing anyway, feeling ever more out of place as it went on and increasingly suspecting that Tom Tom Club would not appear. Finally the show ended, and I went to the ticket counter, where it was explained to me that TTC had cancelled a while back and I had seen a Sublime tribute band. I did not feel, to borrow a phrase, like a Genius of Live.

The club should have said something when you handed over your ticket.

Yeah, I thought that too! I made a sort of faltering attempt to ask for my money back and they were considering it, weighing the fact that I'd stayed through the whole show, but I felt so mortified I didn't feel like lingering to pursue it.

Funny story, Federico Boswarlos!

Me: walked down to a local venue one night, around ten years ago, to see the Magic Markers. They were touring the western United States, playing songs from the album Boss. Lee Ranaldo produced the album and played guitar on two or three songs. I was sort of a huge SY fan, beginning around 1996, gradually losing interest after Rather Ripped, but still keeping up on them. I arrived at the venue (Urban Lounge, in Salt Lake City), and I was kind of lit up/ripped. As MM were setting up, primed to begin, I walked up to the stage and yelled "Where's Lee!!??" (asshole) ... The band started playing and the front-woman, Elisa Ambrogio, announced "Hey we're the Magick Markers, we're a Sonic Youth cover band" (pissed off) ... I was standing up front, center stage, and she had sort of singled me out.. uttering a few expletives (can't recall), like "Go fuck yourself", "Suck my dick", etc. and she flipped me off. Their performance was pretty badass--lean songs, no frills, raw, drone-y, w/serious / disinterested demeanor, even sy-like. Afterwards, I approached Elisa, apologised, and we ended up chatting it up / best buds for the remainder of the show.

That was sort of just the beginning / probably 20% of the evening, as I met some kids at the bar, then walked to a house with a practice space in the basement, and spent the rest of the evening out on the porch, drinking and talking about music, listening to some people play this raw (remarkable!), Rhodes-driven funk in the basement. I ended up losing my digital camera and losing control of my bowels on the walk home. I found a large tree that was sort of obscured (from the street light) by an apartment building, dropped my trousers, and leaned my back into the tree, 'sitting' against it .... When I got home I crumpled up my jeans and threw them in the garbage can, before going inside. It was a long, fucked up (and excessive), weird night.

lol i was gonna say i had a neighbor like that during the 1 year i lived in a college dorm who listened to songs on repeat and i had to ask him to stop.
songs included:
Sarah McLachlan "Possession"
Corey Hart "Sunglasses at Night"
Depeche Mode "Personal Jesus"

we slept separated only by a cinderblock wall
i thought i was going to lose my mind

― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera)

That’s a solid choice of songs though, I wouldn’t mind hearing them frequently

Funny story, Federico Boswarlos!

Me: walked down to a local venue one night, around ten years ago, to see the Magic Markers. They were touring the western United States, playing songs from the album Boss. Lee Ranaldo produced the album and played guitar on two or three songs. I was sort of a huge SY fan, beginning around 1996, gradually losing interest after Rather Ripped, but still keeping up on them. I arrived at the venue (Urban Lounge, in Salt Lake City), and I was kind of lit up/ripped. As MM were setting up, primed to begin, I walked up to the stage and yelled "Where's Lee!!??" (asshole) ... The band started playing and the front-woman, Elisa Ambrogio, announced "Hey we're the Magick Markers, we're a Sonic Youth cover band" (pissed off) ... I was standing up front, center stage, and she had sort of singled me out.. uttering a few expletives (can't recall), like "Go fuck yourself", "Suck my dick", etc. and she flipped me off. Their performance was pretty badass--lean songs, no frills, raw, drone-y, w/serious / disinterested demeanor, even sy-like. Afterwards, I approached Elisa, apologised, and we ended up chatting it up / best buds for the remainder of the show.

That was sort of just the beginning / probably 20% of the evening, as I met some kids at the bar, then walked to a house with a practice space in the basement, and spent the rest of the evening out on the porch, drinking and talking about music, listening to some people play this raw (remarkable!), Rhodes-driven funk in the basement. I ended up losing my digital camera and losing control of my bowels on the walk home. I found a large tree that was sort of obscured (from the street light) by an apartment building, dropped my trousers, and leaned my back into the tree, 'sitting' against it .... When I got home I crumpled up my jeans and threw them in the garbage can, before going inside. It was a long, fucked up (and excessive), weird night.

― braunld (Lowell N. Behold'n)

This sounds like a fun night. I’m too old to get invited to strangers parties anymore, it sucks.

Here’s a shameful music-related story I do remember though:

Living in Mexico city, a nearby bar/music venue had “botellita de jerez” playing live that night and I had nothing better to do so I went there.

Brief interlude: I assume most of you have no idea who are Botellita de Jerez. They’re a sort of cult band from mexico, popular in the underground scene in the 80’s and 90’s (here’s their wikipedia article https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Botellita_de_Jerez )

I get there and I see a biker looking man and his biker looking friends smoking outside the club and I need a light so I approach them. Just as I was about to ask for the lighter one of them interrupts me “hey do you have any marihuana cigarettes over there?” I smile awkwardly “No, sorry. Hey do you know when Botellita de Jerez start playing?” One of his friends tells me “sorry you’re late they already finished the show!” Bummer... we start talking and I find out that the bar has a weird schedule... they have bands play early as a pre-drinks thing and then the bar becomes more of a club with djs.
I finish my cigarette and he tells me “ah don’t worry about missing them, if you live in the city you’ll eventually get a chance to see them” I shrug “I don’t know, I don’t really like their music, I just came because I live around the block” one of them laughs “why don’t you like them?” I apologize “sorry, you’re probably fans of the band but I think of them as comedy rock and they’re not particularly good at comedy or at rock for the matter” they all laugh, he says “well you’re right, they are terrible” they finish their cigarettes, wave me goodbye and get in a cab.

A friend that saw the show appeared out of nowhere and greets me overtly excited “hey! Did you like their show!? It was crazy fun”. I explained I had just arrived had no idea the main band started so early. He says “Oh well! At least you got to share a cigarette and talk for a while with them!”

haha, classic

loved frederic boswarlos' story

I did also once interrupt MC Hammer in the middle of a speech in 2009, where he started a chant that went

"I AM" - crowd: "Hammer"!

and on the third time, screamed "broke!", and the crowd around me erupted. the only time I've ever heckled at a show, mostly cos he was putting in a garbage performance, half-assed

― fuck the NRA (Neanderthal), Tuesday, August 28, 2018 12:37 PM (three weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

So many questions about this, but expecting an MC Hammer show in 2009 to be anything other than half-assed seems a bit too much to hope for maybe?