amanda palmer's open poem to jonathan chait (and other crimes)

it's not a con if you want to be fooled

i think i'm more frustrated by her fanbase if i think about it

well no i think i'm really more frustrated with the lefsetz/ted talk type bozos who held her up as the future of music making. now THERE was a con.

a+ tweet tho

Strike that. Reminds me of Prince. A point in her favor, imo.

never thought I'd be able to come up with a scenario where the other man is more upset at having his name called out than the husband is about it

...oorrrrr it could remind me of Gene Simmons. Back to point against.

should i go nearly $50,000 into debt for this?

i realize this is in essence a subscription service (and considering the claim that you won't be punished for a monthly cap of $10 on your subscription, a not ungenerous one) but can we still please laugh about an FAQ that ends with Q: "i love you. i just wanted to say that."

like if this is basically what everybody's doing on patreon can we please have a rolling CULT LEADERS ON PATREON thread

I know nothing about Patreon. Is this really "fundamentally no different from everyone else's patreon"?

Are there other people using Patreon like this to get a set fee every time they decides to make a completely-undefined "thing", any time they want?

like let's contrast the peak what you can give pomplamoose

Pledge $10.00 or more per video

200 patrons
The Producer Pack
-Learn how Jack produces and create your own remixes of our songs! Jack will be recording Ableton session overviews, as well as stems for you to experiment with!
+Everything listed above!

and palmer's

Pledge $1,000.00 or more per thing

3 patrons (Limited 2 of 5 left)
i'll call. we'll talk. we'll have dinner. all the things, pretty much. thank you (holy shit).

that... that kind of reads like she'll bone you for $1000

I know that's super gross and uncharitable but it's how it comes across to me

have some fuckin dignity sheesh

i have no desire to sexualize it, but it's definitely a sale of interpersonal intimacy and access. and if people are willing to pay 1k for that, you might as well have them gardening for you in matching snuggies

(holy shit)

hmmmm

Part of my reading is a reflexive desire to cast the abominable phrase "all the things" in the worst possible light whenever I encounter it

http://traumwerk.stanford.edu/archaeolog/Olsen_In%20defense%20of%20things.jpg

pretty much

A friend of mine paid $250 just to have a photo taken with Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner. No call, no talk, no dinner. 90 seconds and a photo. That was on top of another $50 to get into the event where it happened. My friends brother paid $500 for a "backstage experience" with Motorhead - hanging out in a room with a bunch of other fans plus the band for half an hour. So paying a grand for that doesn't seem too bad really if you like the artist.

xpost obv the entertainment industry has long known access to heroes is a salable commodity (HANG OUT WITH METALLICA AND MTV, yadda ya) and you could even argue what she's doing is kinder to the kind of fan that sends in a hundred postcards to hang out backstage. but what kind of person can OFFER that kind of emotional availability simply for a price, other than your l-rons.

xpost It's $1000 per "thing"

there are a million william shatners who will take your money in exchange for a sprinkling of their fame-dust but on some level it'd be weirder if shatner was like NOW YOU ARE MY FRIEND FOR LIFE I SWEAR TO YOU

lemmy letting 50 rubes sit backstage with him vs lemmy having a monthly skype date with 50 rubes who've provided their cc numbers

Picturing Lemmy or Spock & Kirk telling strangers, "I love you. I just wanted to say that" is pretty fun.

noooo it's even weirder! amanda is saying that is a frequently asked question. her response is

"i love you too. here's a hug ((((((((((())))))))))))"

The vibe of the Spock/Kirk photo op was more like "do not touch them, do not engage them in conversation, this is a photo opportunity no more". Escorted in from the left. Pose. Photo taken. Escorted out to the right while next rube approaches from left. I think my friend would've preferred dinner.

well no shit. everyone would prefer their hero show them love, respect and attention, especially after they've coughed up considerable green. the question is what kind of person promises that subscription-style

It's not that weird flattering/hyping the love you get from your fanbase is a large part of managing that fanbase in the new digital panhandling future.

that's not a hug! those are parentheses!

It's not that weird flattering/hyping the love you get from your fanbase is a large part of managing that fanbase in the new digital panhandling future.

no it's still weird, or pomplamoose would be offering it too

"i love you too. here's a hug (((((((((((goatse.cx))))))))))))"

Wasn't there a music video in the late 90s that was some nondescript guy walking around with a sign that said "Free hugs" and it was just him hugging people and meant to be some enlightening twee performance art feel like she is running w those vibes.

the open-endedness of the $1000 pledge is off-putting, as it seems like this would be attractive to a person who wants her as a friend, and that that friendship can be purchased for $1000 and be a total GFE. But when does it stop? What if she doesn't call you one day? Is there a contract length to this comitment? Will she become your life-long buddy?

obv the willingness to offer a serious emotional connection to anyone willing to cough up the bucks is a good quality to have in our digital future but it's still a tier or eight above RTing compliments and photo ops

Jack Conte from Pomplamousse has three patrons that pay $100 per video. He makes a video every 20-30 days. That's about $1500/year. For that they get a phone call and a monthly skype for an hour. The business model is fine. The only weird thing is that someone wants to do it with Jack Conte/Pomplamousse/Amanda Palmer.

A friend of mine paid $250 just to have a photo taken with Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner. No call, no talk, no dinner. 90 seconds and a photo. That was on top of another $50 to get into the event where it happened. My friends brother paid $500 for a "backstage experience" with Motorhead - hanging out in a room with a bunch of other fans plus the band for half an hour. So paying a grand for that doesn't seem too bad really if you like the artist.

― everything, Wednesday, March 4, 2015 2:37 PM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

these sort of things always make me feel bad for the band. who the fuck wants to spend 30 minutes with a bunch of rabid fans who paid too much to be there? sounds like purgatory.

same thing when hal hartley offers to have lunch with somebody if they spend $3,000 to support his new movie. what a horrible lunch that must be.

Wasn't there a music video in the late 90s that was some nondescript guy walking around with a sign that said "Free hugs" and it was just him hugging people and meant to be some enlightening twee performance art feel like she is running w those vibes.

By nondescript guy you mean Judah Friedlander?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXe8PFKsOIc

" For that they get a phone call and a monthly skype for an hour. "

WTF are you going to talk to some stranger about for an hour? From either end that is weird! I feel weird when I meet celebrities or musicians I like after about ten words.

i apologize for assuming jack from pompalamoose wasn't also down for this kind of subscription superfan cultivation, which was indeed short-sighted of me

does amanda palmer have a lot of stalkers? b/c her behavior -- predicated on a constantly-projected false intimacy with her fans -- would seem to lead to that sort of thing.

esp. given how many fans she has that buy into it.

i apologize for assuming jack from pompalamoose wasn't also down for this kind of subscription superfan cultivation, which was indeed short-sighted of me

― da croupier, Wednesday, March 4, 2015 1:05 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

He owns the Patreon website.

Wasn't there a music video in the late 90s that was some nondescript guy walking around with a sign that said "Free hugs" and it was just him hugging people and meant to be some enlightening twee performance art feel like she is running w those vibes.

― ©Oz Quiz© (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, March 4, 2015 3:59 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lollllll it was the fucking dave matthews band

though ok jack at least makes a point to suggest his role is that as a technical advisor rather than a bff

Pledge $100.00 or more per video

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ahhh dang too slow. forgot that it was judah friedlander

must be weird when a spot becomes available in jack's three amigos club. like, was it some amicable "ok now i know how to set up a launchpad, thanks jack! bye!" thing? did shit get too real? not real enough?

That is so crazy! LOL DMB.

Yeah everyone otm on how weird it would be to have to spend an hour on the phone/skype with a complete stranger who you know nothing about other than they gave you $1,000. You probably start feeling like a politician.

Or even start to feel like you're at work and that this is your job or something!

idea: you pay $1,000 to have a personal conversation with a musician you admire, who proceeds to interrogate you about why you like his terrible music and why you thought talking to him one on one would be rewarding. conversation ends in tears. you hang up, then get an email from paypal notifying you that the $1,000 has been withdrawn from your account.