What Is The Worst Line Stephin Merritt Has Written?

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (55 of them)

And so did other people.

― the bellefox, Friday, 19 November 2004 15:49 (nineteen years ago) link

You know, I bought 69 as I liked the concept. And the execution was way better than I had any right to expect. But it also means that I have no need for more MagFi CDs. I did download 'take ecstacy' tho.

Surely there's a "Search/Destroy" thread just for the 69 set?

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 19 November 2004 15:54 (nineteen years ago) link

THe line is Papa Was A Rodeo, where he says "Diesel gas". Diesel fuel is not gasoline, they are two different things.

― Jeff-PTTL (Jeff), Friday, 19 November 2004 17:51 (nineteen years ago) link

every damn line is awful, the man's a pompous, self important wanker

― Porkpie (porkpie), Friday, 19 November 2004 18:34 (nineteen years ago) link

I think just for writing the song "Smoke and Mirrors" he is pretty much a hero. Anybody who is as prolific a writer as he is is going to have some lines sneak in that bug people or fall flat, but I think that's just a reflection of how good he is when he's really on.

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Friday, 19 November 2004 18:44 (nineteen years ago) link

seventeen years pass...

An unexpected revival inspired by poster Imago:

This thread is literally almost 21 years old. I fear that much of it is callow. But I just found myself thinking "what's the worst Merritt song, that would be a good question" and then thinking "... I think we had a whole thread like this".

He may now have issued lines and songs worse than he had 17-18 years ago!

― the pinefox, Monday, 21 February 2022 21:42 (two years ago) link

This is a contender for a relatively bad song lyric, from c.2012:

I'm going back to the country
City life's too slow
I'm sick of that 120 BPM funk and disco
I'm doing a one-eighty
Break out the fiddle tunes
I'm still that barefoot lady howling up at full moons
And I'm gonna fly back to Wyoming
And never more my friends I'll go a-roaming
I'm gonna fly back to Laramie
Let Laramie take care of me till they bury me
I'm going back to the country
The big city's too small
I don't need more than one tree house but there's none at all
I'm hanging up the tire swing
A hammock in the yard
I'll hear an angel choir sing as I wing countryward
And I'm gonna find me a country boy
And have a couple country kids, Leanne and Leroy
And we're gonna wind down those country roads
And sing and play the dulcimer till this world explodes

― the pinefox, Monday, 21 February 2022 21:47 (two years ago) link

And I fear that I will also nominate this from 2020:

She's got the biggest tits in history
She loves to show them 'round
They're bigger than her chickadees
They each weigh half a pound
She told me she's got more of them
But I've seen only three
And those were, I'm quite sure, the biggest tits in history
Your average tit weighs half an ounce
That's if you feed them well
But she's got ways to make tits bouncy baby boys from hell
She majored in biology
She knows whereof she speaks
You know her tits are happy from their smiling little beaks
She's working for the government
She's breeding them for clones
To use them on the battlefield
For intercepting drones
Her mother did the same work
It's all through her family tree
And that's why Lola's got the biggest tits in history
Tits in history
Tits in history

― the pinefox, Monday, 21 February 2022 21:48 (two years ago) link

"You know her tits are happy from their smiling little beaks"

seems especially bad.

― the pinefox, Monday, 21 February 2022 21:49 (two years ago) link

should be "by their smiling little beaks" surely

― Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 21 February 2022 23:31 (two years ago) link

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.