amanda palmer's open poem to jonathan chait (and other crimes)

surprised there's not already a switched face version of that picture

that is the switched face version.

neil gaiman at least needs scary eyebrows in 2013

anyone know what exactly happened to her eyebrows?

each one offered as a kickstarter premium; exact location of lash 23 still unknown

terrible drag queen fire

one should never use drag queens for home heating. It says so right on the package.

Some ladies shave them off once and they never come back! Or so my friend who read the I Love Lucy bio claimed

re: eyebrows

for a second there i thought noxeema jackson was gonna hafta reiterate the difference between a drag queen and a transsexual.

So this is JUST for Dan.

Who will LOVE this news.

Yup.

Amanda Palmer
& The Grand Theft Orchestra

Cap Banner Year & Top 10 Album Debut
with
Special New Year’s Eve Show @ Terminal 5 in NYC!

Band to Perform Prince’s Purple Rain In Its Entirety

http://i577.photobucket.com/albums/ss216/8dos7/Princeisdisgusted.gif

next up: a Kickstarter to cover legal fees from the Prince lawsuit

Explaining why they chose to perform Purple Rain this New Year’s, Palmer shares, “The members of the Grand Theft Orchestra (me, Chad, Michael and Jherek) all come from very different musical backgrounds and have wildly different tastes, but there is ONE THING on our venn diagram that overlaps in the "perfect album" department, and that's PURPLE RAIN. We all grew up worshipping this record. Everybody already knows the songs cold (Jherek used to actually be IN A PRINCE COVER BAND) and we're all going to take turns singing and swapping instruments. The band will, of course, be dressed in our finest Prince-esque finery, covering all aspects of Prince, his facial hair, and his various eras of nudity. We're also encouraging the entire audience to "come as your favorite era of prince". I want to run around counting people in ASSLESS CHAPS, and maybe give them door prizes for bravery. New Years Eve is cold.”

She really like USING CAPITALS, huh?

covering all aspects of Prince, his facial hair, and his various eras of nudity

what the hell wrong with u

Maybe she and Neil will come out and duet on "When 2 R in Love" butt naked except for a huge flower.

excuse me, I appear to be dying from lols

Wonder if she'll paint on some Prince facial hair in the same style as her eyebrows?

the question isn't "will she paint on Prince facial hair?", it's "how many times will she run backstage and change her Prince facial hair?"

Ugh, she's totally writing "SLAVE" on her face, too.

I assumed she would be writing "SLAVE" on her chest

That's fucked up, but she's got a great band, so she's halfway there.

Dan, I hear she is asking for $10,000 not to do this. I believe they call it Kickstopper.

Which Prince songs have the most bellowing?

xp: lol

hahaha

She should be asking the audience to volunteer and show up and cheer at the end of "Baby I'm a Star" and "Purple Rain" and not get paid for it. Wait, hold on.

she's totally writing SLAVE for her eyebrows

Jherek

keep imagining someone named derek with a jheri curl

keep imagining someone named derek who is an asshole

with a jheri curl

"Hi I grow and brew my own tea and..."

"DIE."

LOL at Kickstopper
Let us not speak ill of Jherek, who is the best

to be fair, there is something undeniably awesome about the image of a dude named Derek with a jheri curl saying "call me.... JHEREK"

"call me.... JHEREK"

http://eightiesrefugeecamp.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/beyonder.jpg

All apologies to Jherek and those who know him; however the fake Jherek we have created is still hilarious and will live on in our dreams.

I keep imagining that Jherek isn't the asshole but his parents are, at the very least, pretentious.

HS classmate of mine is leader of a Prince covers band followed by thousands of Twin Cities cougars who enjoy a drink or seventeen. He can also be relied on for InfoWars links on Facebook.

An interesting open letter he posted here:

http://jherekbischoff.com/

Also, via his website, he was raised on a boat, and:

My brother and I played in the band The Dead Science together, and my father played drums in avant-garde bands in the 60s and 70s. His band Amra Arma’s main goal was to summon the spirit of Conan! They would wear loin cloths and put on those big old-fashioned scuba helmets that they had retrofitted with analog synthesizers that they would play with their tongues while bashing on their drum sets!

That's entirely too many exclamation marks but I can't help saluting his dad's band for trying to summon Conan.

yeah, I was skeptical at first, but he had me sold by the end

Creation of fake Jherek receives seal of approval from Friends Of Jherek

Fherek.

Frereks de nos Jhereks

it'll almost take the sting out of every shitty thing that happened this year if prince somehow manages to put the kibosh on this.

are you kidding, Amanda Palmer is exactly the type of naked theater kid that Prince adores (ill-advised Holocaust jokes aside)

it'll almost take the sting out of every shitty thing that happened this year if prince somehow manages to put the kibosh on this their tour bus blows up on the way to terminal five.

although the fact that she's already married to a 50-year-old is going to work against her