100 Reasons Why "Ignition - Remix" Is So Damned Great

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25. That synth line in the background of the chorus! It sounds like the Human League!

26. There's something about the production that sounds stripped down just enough so it seems to (cough) "bear the devices"--I'm thinking of the drum fills just before the chorus, and the aforementioned synth line, even the way he double-tracks his vocals ("Sippin' on coke and rum [rum]/I'm like so what I'm drunk [drunk]")....It's like each device calls a bit of attention to itself because the overall production is so sparse (by contemporary standards). Even the relatively langorous way he sings "bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce" (I take it she's bouncing very slowly) calls more attention to that word than a typical R&B/hiphop track where "bounce" would be one of a zillion instructions spit out in 20 seconds or less.

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:20 (twenty-two years ago)

27. The asides in the lyrics: "I'm like, 'So what...'"

28. The good grammar: "Food everywhere / as if the party was catered"

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:22 (twenty-two years ago)

29. I have to say this song fills me with a slight bit of hometown pride (I know someone who went to R. Kelly's high school! etc.) despite his rather foul offstage behavior. I picture R. hanging out at one of those massive Jackson Park BBQs with ragga blasting out of 10-ft-high amps.

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:23 (twenty-two years ago)

30. "I don' normally do this but, uh..."

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

31. When in fact he does normally do this - unless there's some Ignition Mega-Mix 12" coming (we should all be so fortunate), Kelly is claiming that he doesn't normally release the remix at all, then saying he'll let you hear a little of it, and then just playing it.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:37 (twenty-two years ago)

32. And, well - precisely: this is more of that quality Kelly brings to the table that has enabled him to stay strong at the cash register longer than many: it's the dreaded "A" word, you know, "authenticity," all the baggage that carries.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:39 (twenty-two years ago)

33. Not the authenticity of "here's my soul," though that's in there, too, and more about it later. The authenticity of "here's what I got, seems good, I'm not gonna mess with it much more." The authenticity of sufficiency, not excellence. The authenticity of excellence is exactly why so many people vomit when other people start goin' on about authenticity.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:42 (twenty-two years ago)

34. I'm like, so what, I'm drunk.

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:42 (twenty-two years ago)

35. But what we're going to have to come back to is what Nabisco brings up & it's where any hyperbole in which we've been engaging will really find its feet and start doing the Charleston. "WTF, why is R Kelly turning into Sam Cooke?" because R Kelly is Sam Cooke

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:46 (twenty-two years ago)

36. OK I have to go to work now (it's a quarter 'til seven in the morning), everybody keep the reasons coming

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Sam liked 'em young too. Hopefully R. will not share his ultimate fate however.

I'd like to hear R. get busy a capella like on the second track of Night Beat.

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I have to drive 8 hours today and I haven't slept a wink!

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

37. YOu don't even need to own a copy to hear it all the time, just turn on the radio, or if you live in the city open the window.

― nick.K (nick.K), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:07 (twenty-two years ago)

38. i dislike it profusely

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:15 (twenty-two years ago)

39. It makes me want to buy a shotgun.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:16 (twenty-two years ago)

40. stevem and Alex are...The No-Fun Brigade!*

*I have also expressed the same feelings about this song, but I was wrong.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:20 (twenty-two years ago)

41. Because the video has a 360-degree shot of R.'s incredible braidwork, and a funny "white guy learns to dance" part, and shout-outs to dead homiez.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:22 (twenty-two years ago)

don't get me wrong - i don't think its THAT bad, i just have no real feeling for it at all thats the problem. it doesn't excite me, it doesn't make me smile or anything. i wouldn't dance or wave a bottle of beer to it. thats not a flaw on my part or a flaw on the part of the song. JOhn makes good points about the track that i appreciate. and if you're able to ignore the fact that R Kelly is a complete tosspot then more power to you.

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I was a family counselor on Chicago's South Side for a couple of years, and heard a LOT of "R. Kelly being bad" stories (as well as "R. Kelly is a really generous and nice guy" stories) that had NOTHING to do with underaged girls or Hi-8 technology. And I guess I'm pre-disposed to not giving a shit about artists' personal lives when it comes to their music.

42. Because the entire first verse has been reconstructed to sound like it's a prelude to a song that then (once the chorus kicks in) suddenly exists.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually, John, you are completely right about the Sam Cooke thing, now that I actually think about it (thanks), although it still takes me out of that particular song a little bit. Amateurist already hit the echo I like, but I would add that (a) the "bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce" sounds less like like casual dancing instruction and more like ballet, and (b) the "hot and fresh out the kitchen" brings out that good-time barbeque vibe something fierce, like this weekend fun is so wholesome that your mother's going to show up with some warm cornbread for everyone.

― nabisco (nabisco), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:43 (twenty-two years ago)

43. r kelly does not sport a 'fro in the video

44. r kelly has never once sported a 'fro to my knowledge

45. does this mean he referring to hair, um, elsewhere than his head?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:44 (twenty-two years ago)

he struck me as a complete tosspot long before those stories emerged, for what its worth (apparently nada)

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:52 (twenty-two years ago)

46. The way the original "Ignition" seagues into the remix on Chocolate Factory

― Colin Beckett (Colin Beckett), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

stevem: just to clarify, I'm sure he IS a complete tosspot. but I don't really care when it comes to great singles.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:20 (twenty-two years ago)

47. Toot toot.

― Vinnie (vprabhu), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:26 (twenty-two years ago)

but I don't really care when it comes to great singles.

as another aside, i feel this IS the correct way to think about it...but still i doubt i will ever like the song.

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:38 (twenty-two years ago)

48. Beep beep.

― Arthur (Arthur), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:51 (twenty-two years ago)

back around the time the album dropped, a few stations here would play the whole thing, original and remix, all in a row, as the 6-minute epic it is. i love both, but they really sound their best together.

― Al (sitcom), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:53 (twenty-two years ago)

OK so after reading this fine thread I decided to download a copy of the track, and HOLY SHIT! knocked my socks off! I'd heard it before in various background-music environments but never paid attention/realized what it was. I think I'm in love.

I'm totally with #7. I love that he identifies the song as a remix--it's a song about itself!

― s1utsky (slutsky), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

49) The 'stirring dance'

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

he's just demonstrating that it is indeed hot and fresh out the kitchen

― Al (sitcom), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Exactly. Greatness.

Plus:

50) His green-and-white wristband.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 15 June 2003 18:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I kiss all of you so much right now.

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 15 June 2003 18:30 (twenty-two years ago)

51. The very second before a Hip Hop artist (with a huge 'fro') was about to go on stage came over and confessed his love for the track, knowing that I loved it. A memorable moment for me as it was a risky time, months before the anyone had broken cover and rhapsodised about it.

52. It doesn't sound like a 'real' song, rather some studio experiment, or album interlude.

― nick.K (nick.K), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

BUT i'd normally cross oceans to avoid kelly but i accidentally heard this tune in the megastore today and christ, it's brilliant for abt 43 of the reasons described above. i will now have to reappraise my entire life.

― kieron, Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:04 (twenty-two years ago)

53. ok I'm back

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow. Brilliant thread, John. Somehow I haven't heard this song before just now, I just downloaded it because of this thread. (I listen to virtually no radio aside from WFMU these days, and I've never heard it on MTV or BET while channel surfing.) Thank you! It's a wonderful song.

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

54. There's the sudden change in vocal tone in the chorus, right at "mama rollin' that body" - where R Kelly reveals himself to be not just a consummate soul singer, but a pretty clued-in one. Loop that damned line. "Mama rollin' that body": who's that? It's not Kelly. I mean it is him singing, but whose moves is he copping?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (twenty-two years ago)

55. reggae, it's something reggae: dancehall specifically

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (twenty-two years ago)

56. Elephant Man? No, gentler

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (twenty-two years ago)

57. Ini Kamoze? No, that was what I thought, too, but no

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:49 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, I thought the same thing--but I can't really identify what artist

― s1utsky (slutsky), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

58. Oh Christ it's Shaggy, where the hell did that come from?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:55 (twenty-two years ago)

59. Would anybody who's not comfortable with having their contributions posted as part of my weekly Last Plane to Jakarta update please say so before the thread's over, thanks

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:56 (twenty-two years ago)

60. Yes I am aware that technically speaking that last one is not a reason why "Ignition - Remix" is so damned great, and neither is this one for that matter

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (twenty-two years ago)

61. But hey, what can you do?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (twenty-two years ago)

62. Anyhow

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (twenty-two years ago)

63. (note also that the whole feel of the remix owes a fair amount to Buju Banton, of all people)

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:58 (twenty-two years ago)

64. let's posit that somebody involved with this record has heard some dancehall

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:02 (twenty-two years ago)

65. and let's further posit that R Kelly is that guy, which is a lot more probable than the "oh-but-he's-do-dumb" crowd would like to admit, but all the disparate elements in his style suggest either the happiest accident of all time or a remarkable keen ear for when to put what where

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 338 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

or "You Remind Me of Something," the stupidest ballad in R&B history?

― So who you gonna call? The martini police (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 19:45 (four years ago)

like my bank accooooooooount

― Gardyloominati (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 19:47 (four years ago)

Or Bump N Grind, or Your Body's Callin', or Fiesta, or Step (In The Name of Love), or World's Greatest, or about a billion other songs that got a shit-ton of play all over the place (let alone how long he dragged out Trapped In The Closet)

― talkin' about his flat tire (DJP), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 19:51 (four years ago)

"Step (In The Name of Love)" is one of the few I can stand these days.

― So who you gonna call? The martini police (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 19:56 (four years ago)

"You Remind Me of Something," the stupidest ballad in R&B history

That video was the first I saw of him, and still the only song of his that I've really heard; based on that I thought he was something like the R&B Tenacious D.

― Halfway there but for you, Tuesday, 28 September 2021 20:10 (four years ago)

you should (shouldn't) hear "the zoo"

― grove street (party) direction (voodoo chili), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 20:32 (four years ago)

Happy to say I never danced to or bought the token hype for Ignition rmx. I’m with you: Fuck R. Kelly.

― ✖✖✖ (Moka), Tuesday, September 28, 2021 5:24 AM (ten hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

He’s being convicted for raping women not recording the ignition remix

― xheugy eddy (D-40), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 20:57 (four years ago)

all over the place

it is possible that Nabozo lives in a different place

― bobo honkin' slobo babe (sic), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 21:17 (four years ago)

not sure whether this has also been ruined

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuY1rt4qp5M

― edited to reflect developments which occurred (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 21:17 (four years ago)

He’s being convicted for raping women not recording the ignition remix

― xheugy eddy (D-40)

By not giving him money via streams or buying his records I was indirectly not helping him pay for lawyers to continue with all the raping. Some people would rather believe that over-selling his music as “best song of a generation” and writing articles about it and voting for his music in End of Decade lists in fucking 2010 is all in good fun because there’s no way he received any money from it right?

― ✖✖✖ (Moka), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 22:42 (four years ago)

Abused in his youth… an addict as a adult… Ike Turner served 18 months in prison.. Rick James did similar time. Ike came out a changed positive human being. How long should R Kelly spend in prison -and does a USA system give a man a chance for a man to change his world around?
— Chuck D (@MrChuckD) September 28, 2021

― Pfunkboy AKA (Oor Neechy), Tuesday, 28 September 2021 22:51 (four years ago)

(xpost)

Hail Moka, full of taste, preiscience is with thee. Blessed art thou among ilxors and blessed is the fruit of thy music purchases. Holy Moka, accountent of ethics, have mercy on us listeners now and in the future should an artist we enjoy be exposed as a sexual preditor. Amen.

― BrianB, Tuesday, 28 September 2021 23:21 (four years ago)

If there's a civil suit and Kelly's future royalties get awarded as damages to the plaintiff, do the songs become ethical to stream again

― Nature's promise vs. Simple truth (bernard snowy), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 01:32 (four years ago)

no bc spotify still gets some iirc

― balance transfer eligible (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 01:55 (four years ago)

It was forksclovetofu who said it, not J0hn, and forks was (ill-advisedly) quoting a Chapelle Show skit rather than making an actual threat
That said, the cursory glance through the old posts I took shows Robert was coming at this from the same place I ended up, namely a Black man really fucking tired of white people lapping up the R. Kelly Minstrel Show, only he got there way before Trapped in the Closet happened, which was my breaking point

yeah Robert was right in the thread he's ref'ing and few who posted to it, myself included, have much/anything to be proud of.

― J Edgar Noothgrush (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 02:22 (four years ago)

Ok I did see Space Jam - have not heard any of the others - and I do live in a "different place".

― Nabozo, Wednesday, 29 September 2021 05:41 (four years ago)

Hardly prescient, he’s been a known sexual predator since 1994.

― ✖✖✖ (Moka), Wednesday, 29 September 2021 09:18 (four years ago)

it's not *really* comparable but watching how Nicki Minaj has tried to use the R Kelly model and failed to distract from some serious allegations about her and her husband, I feel a bit more optimistic that there won't be anyone getting a "pass" on this level again, and I hope this marks a serious change in how the industry deals with situations like this.

― boxedjoy, Wednesday, 29 September 2021 09:25 (four years ago)

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