Coldplay's 'new' direction...

Martin sings nakedly

worst slash fic ever

sonic cathedrals

No. Not even ironically.

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/sashafrerejones/2011/10/why-dont-i-like-coldplay-an-investigation.html

i LOL'd a few times.

1. Chris Martin, Writer. +14
He can write a catchy melody. See “Paradise,” an immensely stupid song with an elegant and confident verse and chorus line, slightly reminiscent of a prime Noel Gallagher moment.

This is why I love Coldplay. Period. The rest of his argument is uninteresting. This is the only thing that counts to me. He is a genius. Period.

I also notice that everything about his arguments that is actually about the music is positive. I wish people would stop judging anything else but the music. In music, the music itself is the only thing that counts. Screw image, screw lyrics, screw fan demographics, screw ANYTHING but the music!

I'm not screwing my mom, Geir

I'm not screwing Dick Cheney's vag.

the visual motif for this new album is just fucking horrid

geirbot is getting a little agitated.

Fuck off Geir.

Geir, I've liked all the Coldplay albums so far. I don't really reach for them, but I wouldn't tell someone to turn them off, either. However, the two singes from this so far have sucked, or at the very least have been sub-par. Frankly, I'm shocked that someone with such a rarified ear would give them a pass. What would Tony Banks say?

Singles, that is. The singles fail to singe.

S F-J, in for the kill:

Seven out of ten times, Coldplay sound almost exactly like U2—the U2 that exists now

Double zing.

the follow-up line is the zinger, though: "This is inefficient."

the weird thing is that coldplay seems to owe 75% of what they are to U2, including the appallingly vague-yet-grandiose lyrics. but chris martin somehow manages to be Even Worse of a Lyricist than bono, which is a cardinal achievement.

Yeah, that's the kicker to me. The guy is one of the worse lyricists, which I'm sure even Geir would concede. Like, Lenny Kravitz is Martin's "Thank God for Mississippi."

Worst, gah. I've got Chris Martin fingers; despite the best intentions, everything just comes out wrong.

lenny kravitz, whoo boy. that guy is bad in a very different way. he doesn't usually strain for significance, and her rarely bothers to be obscure, but his lyrics are like 5th-grader-writing-their-first-condolence-card insipid.

i think the fact that geir can so successfully ignore chris martin's lyrics is proof, if we needed any, of his autism.

haha i kid. that's cruel. but seriously geir is an autistic racist. :hugs:

Every step that you take
Could be your biggest mistake
It can bend and it can break
But that's the risk that you take

And a motherfucker.

Every step that you take
Could be your biggest mistake
It can bend and it can break
But that's the risk that you take

this is a perfect example. what does "it" refer to? does martin know? care?

In the three years since Coldplay's last album, the world's problems have gotten a little more urgent.

this is as far as i could get into that review.

Every step that you take
Could be your biggest mistake
It can bend and it can break
But that's the risk that you take

this is a perfect example. what does "it" refer to? does martin know? care?

it's about him boning gwyneth

Surely this one takes the cake, though?

You cut me down a tree and brought it back to me
And that's what made me see where I was going wrong
You put me on a shelf and kept me for yourself
I can only blame myself, you can only blame me

And I could write a song a hundred miles long
Well, that's where I belong and you belong to me
And I could write it down or spread it all around
Get lost and then get found, or swallowed in the sea

You put me on a line and hung me out to dry
And darling that's when I decided to go to sea
You cut me down to size and opened up my eyes
Made me realise what I could not see

And I could write a book, the one they'll say that shook the world
And then it took, it took it back from me

and so on and so forth...

I thought the lyrics on the third record were the early nadir. Let me scan for a good (bad) one...

I thought the lyrics on the third record were the early nadir. Let me scan for a good (bad) one...

― Josh in Chicago, Friday, October 21, 2011 9:43 PM (7 seconds ago) Bookmark

Oh yeah, definitely. The lyrics on 'X&Y' are absolutely loaded with stinkers - most of them feel completely underwritten, which of course is completely at odds with the 'grandiosity' of the music, which in itself is an over-glossy, over-slick brew of worn U2 cliches, and calculated attempts to push the buttons of middle aged mothers.

OK, see, "Speed of Sound" is a good song, but check it out:

How long before I get in?
Before it starts, before I begin?
How long before you decide?
Before I know what it feels like?
Where To, where do I go?
If you never try, then you'll never know.
How long do I have to climb,
Up on the side of this mountain of mine?

Look up, I look up at night,
Planets are moving at the speed of light.
Climb up, up in the trees,
every chance that you get,
is a chance you seize.
How long am I gonna stand,
with my head stuck under the sand?
I'll start before I can stop,
before I see things the right way up.

And so on:

Ideas that you'll never find,
All the inventors could never design.
The buildings that you put up,
Japan and China all lit up.
The sign that I couldn't read,
or a light that I couldn't see,
some things you have to believe,
but others are puzzles, puzzling me.

Etc.

the weird thing is that coldplay seems to owe 75% of what they are to U2

U2, to me, haven't the same melodic qualities that Coldplay do. U2's songs are often build around The Edge's guitar riffs, while the Coldplay are all about the choruses. That is the main difference between the two of them. Surely, there are musical similarities, but Coldplay are melodically stronger and more anthemic.

How long am I gonna stand,
with my head stuck under the sand?
I'll start before I can stop,
before I see things the right way up.

http://www.politablog.com/wp-content/uploads/Nobel_medal_dsc06171.jpg

And I just don't care about lyrics, that's all. A good lyric is nice and can add something. But a bad lyric doesn't matter to me if it is on top of a great tune. A great tune is great regardless of the lyrics being whatever gibberish they want to be.

But Geir, those new songs have no tunes! It's true!

a tune does not a song make, geirbot.

xpost

A tune does a song make, yes. If it has a lyric, regardless of what the lyric is about.

As long as the lyrics aren't welsh.

A tune does a song make, yes. If it has a lyric, regardless of what the lyric is about.

― Hongroe (Geir Hongro), Friday, October 21, 2011 4:53 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark

i can't even parse this, dude. a tune makes a song, but only with a lyric?

As long as the lyric isn't welsh.

Geir, have you heard much Billy Joel? He's kind of like Coldplay without all the falsetto delay-drenched guitar. You'd like him! Very melodic.

every time i start "arguing" w/ geir i have to remember that this is the dude who says that africans didn't have music until the white man showed up.

and who thinks a bunch of simpering early-80s power pop that nobody else gives a shit about is the pinnacle of western culture.

this dissection of coldplay's lyrics has been really fruitful and interesting to read and i now have a better understanding of what the band is about

Can't believe Coldplay are raping Gorky's Zygotic Mynci's memory.

this dissection of coldplay's lyrics has been really fruitful and interesting to read and i now have a better understanding of what the band is about

― J0rdan S., Friday, October 21, 2011 5:04 PM (17 seconds ago) Bookmark

what's actually behind the sarcasm here? you don't think their lyrics are stupid?

yeah, but i don't think matters one bit

Not one bit? Not even a little bit? I think it does, especially when they parse poorly compared to Bono. That's notable.

Certainly if they were good they would matter. So if they're not good, they must matter, too.

I find the obsequious vagueness of their lyrics offensive.

i think it would be equally bizarre to be all OMG COLDPLAY'S LYRICS ARE AWWWWWESOME, as i'm sure some ppl out there believe. it's really, really missing the point either way.