TOOL - C/D!?

The thing that separates Tool from them, I think, is Tool's relentless anger and negativity. Yes, it is all right if your lyrics don't do much in and of themselves -- and I didn't say "lyrics" so much as "authorial voice", which is partially semantic, but it's worth pointing out that -- lyrics or no -- you, and I, and everyone else has at least a general sense of what Eno and Beck's aesthetics are about.

I think the difference with Tool is that they're claiming more than that -- they're claiming to have something to say that justifies the deeply unpleasant, violently angry nature of their music (both lyrically and, to a lesser extent, sonically). And when you ask them what it is, it comes out, "bluh bluh corporations bluh the government bluh bluh non-tradional sex acts and/or images of feces bluh!" Don't go all vague on me, Tool, is what I'm saying. Don't show me a lot of disgusting things unless you can justify my unsettlement -- otherwise it's just shock for shock's sake.

And as far as I'm concerned, Tool don't even come close to justifying it -- their message, as it were, is a bunch of empty and bitter cliches. And if I wanted empty cliches, well, there are a lot of empty cliches out there that don't harangue me about ridiculous conspiracy theories or force me to contemplate the image of a man sucking his own dick. I'll probably listen to them, then.

And yeah, I understand that I privilege lyrics more than most people. We may be arguing at cross purposes from the beginning, really.

I tend to judge lyrics on how well the suit the song's mood and meter; Tool rates pretty highly on that scale for me. "Meaning" is a bonus.

Don't just call me pessimist
Try and read between the lines
I can't imagine why you wouldn't
Welcome any change, my friend

That doesn't seem relentlessly negative to me. Also, did you have no metal as a child? I'm getting that feeling.

But perhaps it's more relevant to the question that I hate conspiracy theorists in general, and have the same violently negative reaction to Bill Hicks? I just think their (Hicks'/Tool's) modus operandi -- alleging frequently-unspecified and always-unverified misdeeds on the part of likewise-vague Large and Monolithic Cultural Forces, spuriously connecting said forces to repugnant/scatological images, and slapping a veneer of quasi-mystical overtones on the whole thing -- is both intellectually dishonest and incredibly tiresome.

And what kind of dick musician refers to the listener as "my friend"? Talk about a thing you only do if you have an impractical haircut!

- Do you realize you still haven't even tried to argue against me?

- I like some rap music; I can't say I'm well-versed in the field. What does that have to do with anything?

Don't give me "sense of humor". Have you been reading any of my posts? Way funnier than anything you're coming up with. And the kind of embarrassing, childish dick-and-poo talk Tool engage in is basically the antithesis of humor. (There's something else I could say here, but I won't.)

*blinks*

Look, maybe you really think you're funny -- hey, I often have the same affliction (but I don't AUTOMATICALLY assume I'm funny). All you're doing is coming across as one of the most tendentiously dull writers I've read in a long time (and believe me, when you work even slightly in academia, you get to know the type). There's nothing funny in your posts -- intentionally, at least. But if your goal is deep satire, then congratulations, you really capture the mode of suicidal boredom with aplomb.

I'll also admit this whole thing has upset me more than it probably should. There's something about conspiracy theorists in general, and Bill Hicks/his followers in particular, that just angers me uncontrollably. Sorry about that!

Whatever; this discussion isn't worth anyone's time or anger. No matter what either of us says, I'm going to continue to think Tool are paranoid, arrogant, crass, and inhumane, the worst sort of self-important shock-for-shock's-sake-masquerading-as-Deep nonsense -- as I said, no better than Bill Hicks. Meanwhile, the rest of you are either going to disagree (for various reasons) or not care. Nothing's going to change much.

But enough. I really should stop this.

OMG pessimist IS maynard james keenan

(I'm not from England.)

(Yeah, I think the rat bit might've been better if I ended it after the first paragraph.)

LOL

Nevertheless, it is perhaps fair to say that I have never had any reason to expect to enjoy the works of Tool. I will grant that point.

anyway, here is my aenema review from spin (i had no idea it was on line):

http://toolshed.down.net/articles/index.php?action=view-article&id=December_1996--Spin.html

Belle and Sebastian vs Tool, let's discuss

i had the excuse of being 14, though.

MY LIFE WHERE HAS IT GONE?

I suppose I have nothing to say about tool.