Worst Band Names

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Krokus!!

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Enuff Z Nuff

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 21:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Some of these names, however, are so bad they're funny, which takes them out of the running.

For a name that breaks your heart before you've heard a note, it's got to be An Emotional Fish (mentioned above).

With the possible exception of Dishwalla.

― Rick Massimo (Rick Massimo), Wednesday, 3 March 2004 21:47 (twenty-two years ago)

You've all obviously forgotten the Dogs In Space soundtrack which featured the band THRUSH AND THE CUNTS.

There is also the CAPTAIN MATCHBOX WHOOPPEE BAND (hit single My Canary Has Circles Under His Eyes).

Then there's Blodwyn Pig, Henry Cow, M, Terry Dactyl & The Dinosaurs (Jona Lewie was Lead singer), Kajagoogoo, Spandau Ballet, Pseudo Echo,
and lets not forget both the Guess Who and Klaatu who both named themselves hoping that everyone would believe they were the BEATLES in disguise-SHEESH!

― melthoid serendipity, Thursday, 4 March 2004 18:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Bambi Molesters

love the band though...

― eleki-san (eleki-san), Thursday, 4 March 2004 18:25 (twenty-two years ago)

my gf recently met someone from a band called Stutterfly, which is the worst possible variation i've heard on the already awful "Flickerstick/Switchfoot/Fingertight" formula

(actually Fingertight may be even worse)

― morris pavilion (samjeff), Thursday, 4 March 2004 19:20 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Economics class is really boring, so a friend of mine slipped me a note that said he wanted to start a death-metal band and make it have THE hands down worst possible name. So I wrote some down and gave it back...he laughed his nuts off. It has now gone from a simple game to a time-killing addiction. Here are some goodies we collaborated on:

Random Mating
Spiteful Sea Nymphs
Mass Obliteration
Vetoed Miracle
Lung Burger
Spirits of Fish and their Desire to be Holy
Muppet Love
Sodomized Christmas Tree (don't ask)
Space Zombie Jesus
Unholy Matrimony
The Fountain Pens
Thoughtless Giant

There are literally hundreds more...too many to type. We get better at it everyday. With enough practice, any one can come up with hilarious names

― private eyeland, Tuesday, 6 April 2004 03:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Pearl Jam
Dilated Peoples
Blink 182
Buffalo Tom
OOIOO
Ten Million Penniless People from Bulgaria
The Darkness
Chumbawamba
Death Cab for Cutie

― Lewis J. Bateman (Lewis Bateman), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 07:21 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

People With Chairs Up Their Noses

Very 80's-kooky skinny tie name that one - then again, I never forgot it.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a Beautiful Day
Flickerswitch
Korn
Was (Not Was)

― Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Tuesday, 11 May 2004 23:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Timex Social Club

― Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Wednesday, 12 May 2004 00:16 (twenty-two years ago)

five months pass...

Inspect Her Gadget is playing tonight at the Whisky-a-Go-Go, folks.

― Taxi Dancing in the Soft Prison (Ben Boyer), Friday, 15 October 2004 00:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Actually - I drive by the Whisky every morning on my way to work, and every day there's a new gem up there. Maybe I will make a regular point of noting the night's bill.

― Taxi Dancing in the Soft Prison (Ben Boyer), Friday, 15 October 2004 00:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Y Kant Tori Read

― 6335, Friday, 15 October 2004 07:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Looking down the list of stuff comin up at the whisky has revealed the following gems-

Mourning After (17th oct)
Soulsik (29th oct)

― hmmm (hmmm), Friday, 15 October 2004 14:54 (twenty-one years ago)

weird how this thread seems to get revived almost annually. i can't believe i haven't seen the following band names mentioned yet:
hootie and the blowfish
letters to cleo
grandaddy (is it the intellectual-hippies-beard thing?)
sparklehorse (i'm always kinda of embarrassed to recommend this
excellent artist because of his totally fey name)
+/- (wtf!)
the stratford 4
east river pipe (see sparklehorse above)
and you will know us by...[blah blah} (if you're going to have a
torturously long title, at
least have a sense of humor
about it)
the dandy warhols
spoon
us maple

― j.m. lockery (j.m. lockery), Friday, 15 October 2004 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...

I must agree that there are some pretty horrible band names out there, but why put effort into hating their name if they make good music? Ditto if they make bad music, just ignore them! At least they're trying to be creative, instead of just making fun of everyone else...

― crumb, Thursday, 6 January 2005 07:54 (twenty-one years ago)

'The Music' is the worst

― Seuss, Thursday, 6 January 2005 07:59 (twenty-one years ago)

You could do a whole sub-thread comprised of only Maryland bands.. Fugazi Osborne

!!! Here we go, Maryland, here we go..! Hooray.

Deep Lust
Life Without Buildings
Archers of Loaf

― daria g (daria g), Thursday, 6 January 2005 09:08 (twenty-one years ago)

"Morex Optimo" is pretty frickin bad.

― Nancy Boy (Nancy Boy), Thursday, 6 January 2005 11:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Worst band name of all time: Dangerous Toys.

I mean, come on, Dangerous fucking Toys? How can you not laugh at yourselves for that?

― cdwill, Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Here's another one: Elf Power.

― cdwill, Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Rocktopus

― Nicholas, Thursday, 6 January 2005 16:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I hope no-one has posted this yet, but...

DOOFGOBLIN

― Raymond Cummings (Raymond Cummings), Thursday, 6 January 2005 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

melbourne -90's -from juke newspaper
exploding white mice

― paul wilson, Thursday, 6 January 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...

In 1991, I saw a cassette tape in a Mount Pleasant, Michigan record store by a band named "Barney Trubble and Cunt Stubble". I really regret not buying it.

― joygoat (joygoat), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 04:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Broken Social Scene

― i am nervous (cochere), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Franz Ferdinand. It could be a cool name if it had a reason, but it doesn't seem to, other than "appropriation of historical names seems to be cool now." The name of a figure whose main claim to fame is having been assassinated doesn't really seem to work on a literal or ironic level for a dance-punk band.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Purple Vulture Shit gets my vote. Actually Tex Perkins gets a 2-play, since he also coined Tex Deadly And The Dum Dums. Equally as bad. Amusing. But bad.

xpost: I agree on Franz Ferdinand. The name is terribly distracting.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Argh, I used the word "seem"/"seems" three times in that post. I've been trying to break that habit.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Someone already posted The Doobie Brothers, which I think might be the single worst name ever.

Also, any band name with the construction -ING VERB + NOUN. Taking Back Sunday, for example.

Finally, the worst local band name I ever heard was "Give Me Danger"

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I remember a newspaper article around 1994 which said Pavement was the worst name since the Doobie Brothers.

― Magic City (ano ano), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:45 (twenty-one years ago)

But I think part of the reason The Doobie Brothers is worse is that when I hear it I have to think about The Doobie Brothers.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 05:58 (twenty-one years ago)

you say party! we say die!
dogs die in hot cars
blue skies at war

― derrick (derrick), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 06:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Finally, the worst local band name I ever heard was "Give Me Danger"

-- Hurting

That is an exceptionally bad name.

― thee music mole, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 06:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Steaming Wolf Penis

― jergins (jergins), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 06:23 (twenty-one years ago)

"Finally, the worst local band name I ever heard was "Give Me Danger"

-- Hurting

That is an exceptionally bad name."

They were a punk band, but my friends and I thought it sounded like a musical and I think we actually invented a hypothetical one, based on the title, about a mama's boy who decides he's had enough of his small town and wants to see the world: "Give me danger! Give me excitement!" etc.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 06:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Give me danger!
Give me danger!
Give me a world of excitement and madness and fun and delight!!

Give me danger!
Give me danger!
Let me roam through the streets of the cities that bathe me in light!!

I've got some rough choreography ideas at this point.

― thee music mole, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 06:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Allegiance
The Sound
As I Lay Dying
Rage Against the Machine
59 Times the Pain (I like the Dü and all--but what a shitty, shitty thing to name your band)
Atombombpocketknife
The Reindeer Section
the Thrills/Chills/Kills/blah blah interchangeable

100% agreed about Songs: Ohia.

― babyalive (babyalive), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 07:08 (twenty-one years ago)

The Bravery

― Jena (JenaP), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Men Without Hats: I always thought this was at least a funny name. It's like , they're the men *without* hats, as though having a hat was the natural state of man.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 17:42 (twenty-one years ago)

"The name of a figure whose main claim to fame is having been assassinated doesn't really seem to work on a literal or ironic level for a dance-punk band."

The assasination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand is seen as the first event that triggered the First World War. So in historical context he is pretty important. Maybe by calling themselves Franz Ferdinand theyre suggesting they will make such an impact on modern history. In which case i'm predicting they fail.

― dmun, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 18:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Wheatus ranks up there with Hoobastank as the worst band name ever.

I disagree with the person who nominated Spoon though. Isn't it a reference to Can? Plus, "spoon" is a cool-sounding word if you say it a few times. And the name matches the music. The empty space created by a spoon is as important to its function as the material it's made from.

Wow, that sounds kinda pretentious, but I still think I have a point.

― Mila, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 18:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Stone Temple Pilots, Alice in Chains, etc.
Evanescence because no one can spell the damn thing
Switchblade Symphony
Boyzone
Modest Mouse, because I can't tell if it's an intentional pun or just a twee phrase. What's next, Nicolai Rimski Corpse?

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 18:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Shooglenifty - an uptempo folk outfit.

these people actually exist.

― john clarkson, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

I vote Hoobastank. It's honestly surreal and disturbing to think someone thought that name up and actually deemed it good enough to put on albums, flyers, posters, etc. It's bafflingly bad.

A while ago one of my friends had me download songs by this band called Septic Flesh. I can't remember what any of the songs were like but i do remember laughing for half an hour straight at the name.

― Adam Bruneau (oliver8bit), Tuesday, 22 February 2005 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

The Killers.

it would have been funny 30 years ago, but now... just childish.

― zeus, Tuesday, 22 February 2005 22:06 (twenty-one years ago)

well, someone who's actually from florida (where hoobastank is from as well), told me once that they use to be called 'whose butt stinks', and were virtually coerced to change it later. now that is certainly worse than hoobastank.

― Jena (JenaP), Wednesday, 23 February 2005 06:44 (twenty-one years ago)

any band on the cover of alternative press!

― latebloomer: HE WHOM DUELS THE DRAFGON IN ENDLESS DANCE (latebloomer), Wednesday, 23 February 2005 08:30 (twenty-one years ago)

-- dmun

Right. But he's important only passively. There's nothing cool or interesting or even funny about Franz Ferdinand. He was a hapless, unwitting catalyst of history, so therefore a lame namesake.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 23 February 2005 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

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