In Honor Of ILX Being Ten, How About Some Quotable Posts Of Yore.

always thought this was real pretty

kinda oedipal with that mrs robinson vibe and the "mutha what a lover" line, not to mention the fact that he wants to "steal his daddy's cue"...but that whomp! whomp! before the first line, then: zitfaced young rod suddenly sitting bolt upright in the unmade mattress on the floor realizing he's got to tell maggie something right then but after he starts, he's not sure exactly what he wants to say or do - get on back to school? find himself a rock n roll band? and she'll probably just put on a pot of herbal tea and talk him down, maybe roll a joint of that crunchy stems n seeds kinda shit homegrown. it's all indecision and sloth, & letting companionship play at love. it's such a reluctant kiss-off, but he's still awed by her - not at all a dylan fuckyou or a stones "you know he won't be leaving as soon as he says. but he will leave, and she'll be better off for it.

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Sunday, November 17, 2002 1:22 AM (7 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

what is the bathtub post?

― goole, Tuesday, August 31, 2010 4:48 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

the one i posted upthread about richard marx

act 1:

lolz, those weird dudes
well sometimes those girls are slammin
yeah this happens to me sometimes
poll results

act 2:

laurel: sometimes this happens and it creeps me out. it's like (comparison to racism)
other ilx girls: yeah tru
some ilx guys: yeah it's kinda creepy and weird
other ilx guys: yeah tru, if you see if from a female perspective
other ilx guys: i do this.
contenderizer: why do you want to control my thoughts??? a dystopian society awaits if we continue on this path. ilx is doomed.

act 3:

laurel: (more about being creeped out)
hi dere: wait a second...what did you say?
laurel: sorry
hi dere: it's cool
contenderizer: i'm not a pervert and i'm tired of being made to feel like one
deej and max: we never said anything like that.
contenderizer: hi dere is a puritan
hi dere: Do you stick your penis up your ass when you twist it around and see how far up your back it reaches? (started by her performance (ie, her pubes) stood out for me (HI DERE) on board I Love Everything on Jul 8, 2009)
jaymc: sometimes i think...i could have killed someone

fin

― omar little, Friday, 4 December 2009 03:53 (8 months ago)

lolllll

hahaha rereading that i forgot about the jaymc coup de grace & almost lost it irl

Remember that I never said the hip-hop was bland (although it can be read that way I guess). I just used hip-hop in conjunction with one of the stereotypes I use to describe pitchfork readers

― false prophets talk in metaphors (CaptainLorax), Monday, August 30, 2010 4:32 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I have several more stereotypes for another time

― false prophets talk in metaphors (CaptainLorax), Monday, August 30, 2010 4:32 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

Still don't get why the ronnie bottle opener is racist tbh

rather than sending it, i shall describe it for you.

A single horn (trumpet?) sounds.

Flourish of violins and other assorted strings. A low sound, much like a tuba, is also detectable.

The horn sounds again, a few semitones lower. It begins to play a slow tune.

Enter piano and some rain effects. The low tuba thing goes on.

Ethereal moans and wail permeate the song.

Suddenly, an oscillating, windy pumping noise fills the speakers, dying away as soon as it arrives. As it returns for the second time, however, a bluesy guitar riff bursts in unexpectedly.

Along with a distorted harmonica.

Some muted percussion is also audible.

Hollis begins to sing: "Oh yeah, the world's turned upside down..."

Shall I continue?

― unfished business, Wednesday, 21 March 2007 17:29 (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
No.

― Michael Jones, Wednesday, 21 March 2007 20:10 (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I've had too much wine to have sexual intercourse.

-- Geir Hongro, Thursday, 7 February 2008 13:00 (Thursday, 7 February 2008 13:00) Bookmark Link

^^^^

Winner

i didn't think Hongros had genitals

ah, I got that one: That was the more "reasonable" version of a Dead Kennedy's tune, amirite?

By the way..

I had to look up that one by "myself" upthread, posted as "Shaggy". I was sure it was a fake.

It wasn't.

Heck, I'm funny sometimes, it seems.

THIS IS THE SOUND OF RADIOHEAD BEING BEATEN AT A GAME THEY WEREN'T EVEN BOLD ENOUGH TO PLAY

Scourage (Haberdager), Thursday, 17 August 2006 23:41 (3 years ago)

O_o

i love the image i have of LJ posting that, working madly away at his keyboard like bach at the organ, hair askew and eyes ablaze

the whole post was something of an opus

Acts that waited 10 years or more to release their best album

mercy.

Bugman - Blur KICK SOME ASS. They never did this so well before, or since. The last two minutes are worth the album price alone, as Coxon and his guitar do some quite illegally delicious things.

tbh, haberdager, that review is enough to make me want to at least check out the album and I don't really care for what Blur I've heard.

explodes (orgasms)

kkvgz skip the opening track whatever you do, on your first listen at least. it's pretty much the most out-of-character opening track ever.

But there's no messing with that one!

fine, whatever, haberdager otm

From its awesome chorus to its tastefully-applied gospel choir!

You spent 6 months thinking it was some really ace American band!

from its 90's alt-rock crib to its spiritualized rip-off

still a catchy song mind, just fucking light-years away from the rest of the album's infinitely superior aesthetic - I start with Bugman every time now

nuff Blur, more legendary posts plz

yeah let's not turn this into "i have been unintentionally or intentionally hilarious across ilx, allow me to show you"

^^^^

Could somebody explain to me why they find "Garageland" any good at all? Thanx.
― dave q, Monday, 5 November 2001

Could somebody explain to me why they find the Clash any good at all? Thanx.
― they dress in leather = they are not punXoR, Monday, 5 November 2001

ramones = wear leather = not punk?
― Sterling Clover, Monday, 5 November 2001

ramones = american = not punk
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

The Ramones not punk? I know this is some kind of clever in-joke, I guess I don't get it. The Clash (and "The Clash") are ace.
― Sean, Monday, 5 November 2001

Sex Pistols were from UK and did not wear leather. Thefore they too were not punk. Also, they knew too few chords.
― Sterling Clover, Monday, 5 November 2001

What's this business about wearing leather? The Clash, the Pistols, the Ramones, the Damned, they *ALL* wore leather. Since when was bovine hide a stipulation of Punk? (or is this some revisionist Straight-edge thing?)
― Alex in NYC, Monday, 5 November 2001

pistols = no leather evah = punk obv.
(i cannot entirely answer for steve jones's ideological purity in re the Absolute of this claim btw)
clash = damned = ramones = not punk obv. (damned = goth just like killing joke)
punk = x-ray spex, eater, pistols and THAT'S IT!!
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

You forgot Sham 69.
― Sterling Clover, Monday, 5 November 2001

And Alternative TV.
― Ned Raggett, Monday, 5 November 2001

no i dint: atv = jazz, sham 69 = emo
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

Yeah, but X-Rays = Glam and eater = prog and sex pistols = garage! Also, you forgot Wire.
― Sterling Clover, Monday, 5 November 2001

wire = gabba
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

Is it time to feed the Trolls already? ramones = american = not punk Hmmmmm. The roots of punk...
1967 Velvet Underground = american
1968 MC5 = american
1968 Iggy Pop/The Stooges = american
1971 New York Dolls = american
1974 Television = american
1974 Ramones = american
1976 Dead Boys = american
1976 Talking Heads = americans
1977 Sex Pistols = british

Oh, I forgot...punk started in 1977, didn't it? (Yes, i do know that John Cale was Welsh, but he's just one Welsh guy in a band with 6 other americans.)
― Lord Custos, Monday, 5 November 2001

roots of punk = slade
vu = indie; mc5 = grebo; stooges = soul; dolls = glitter; television = dire straits it's ok to like; ramones = pop; hedz = nu-pop
Dead Boys = math rock
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

"pistols = no leather evah = punk obv. " - Ridiculous statement
Take a look at this picture:
https://www.greatmodernpictures.com/pistol15.htm
That sure looks like leather to me.
― Alex in NYC, Monday, 5 November 2001

alex that picture is from san francisco winterland gardens!! sex pistols in usa = NOT PUNK!!
anyway, norman phay wins, since i rilly HAD forgotten the adverts:

punXoR = 'Gary Gilmore's Eyes' AND NOTHING ELSE!! (and the version of Crossing the Red Sea you own shd be the one w/o Gilmore on it, as orignally released)
― mark s, Monday, 5 November 2001

(^ = edited)

mark s rools

ahahaha

THIS IS THE SOUND OF RADIOHEAD BEING BEATEN AT A GAME THEY WEREN'T EVEN BOLD ENOUGH TO PLAY

Scourage (Haberdager), Thursday, 17 August 2006 23:41 (3 years ago)

god this is so classic

Once I was in a pizza place in Connecticut. There was this really hot waitress working the pies like no tomorrow. Something about the way she said sausage that made me horny. "Sauseeg". Man did my sauseeg get hard when she talked. We flirted through must of our interactions. At the end of the night I asked her for her number and waht time she got off work. She said she was hanging out late tonight to close up. It was her parents shop. She asked if I wanted to stay and help. I did. We stayed late and we were so attracted to each other that we started going at it right there on the counter. We pushed the Jimmy Fund Donation can aside and layed out some flour on the counter top. We stripped butt naked and I told her to get the meatballs and sauseeg. She proceeded to shove two meatballs inside my rectum. It was hot. I rubbed her all over with capicola and mortadell. I made her my little italian sub and ate the shit out of her.

― captainmeatballs, Wednesday, July 28, 2004 7:38 AM (6 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

doubt you get that kinda service at Subway, Whiney

Last time we went into Subway, the girl wouldn't let us sit down at the tables as she'd only just cleaned up, there was no-one else in the shop, and there was only 1 hour until closing.

Not that we wanted flour on owt...

Context:

Private graduation party with buffet is going on by our bar. Someone mistakes Drunk Woman for extended family and invites her to chow down. As she takes a bite of her sammy, someone else tells her that this is a private party and that the food is for "family ONLY." She sheepishly puts her food back on the buffet and storms over to my desk in rage.

As I deal with the massive line in front of me (it's fucking Memorial weekend and they schedule me ALONE?) she's slur-ranting to her friends that it's SO FUCKING RIDICULOUS that no one had the FUCKING COURTESY to tell her that there was a private party going on. It was SO FUCKING EMBARASSING to have to put that food back, she wants to talk to a fucking Manager on Duty NOW.

I step to the side of my line and advise her that I'll be with her in just a moment, I just need to attend to these people in line.

"WELL HURRY THE FUCK UP CAUSE I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT THIS HUMILIATION."

She continues her noisy protests as she makes her way through the line, leering at the people at the party and demanding to know what the FUCK they're looking at, "TURN AROUND YOU BITCH IN THE WHITE! TURN AROUND!" People are already muttering that somebody needs to call the police.

Finally gets to the front and (after a recap of everything she's already said) berates me some more. I explain to her that there was a large sign announcing that the buffet was for the Gonzalez Graduation Party, and that we presumed the signage would be enough to make the private status of the food clear. Now she wants to know "Why your bartender, that fucking FAGGOT bartender of yours, didn't tell me there was a private party going on? That FAG etc etc"

Without raising my voice I tell her "M'am, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"WHAAAAT?!"

I radio maintanence to bring down her bags (which I accurately guess are still unpacked because I just checked her in half an hour ago) and start serving the people behind her. She wants to know why she's being asked to leave etc etc, answer being

"M'am, we reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. My bartender, myself, and my general manager will not tolerate your hate speech on our property. We have not and will not charge you a cent and you're free to take your business elsewhere. I'd rather not call the police, but if you insist on continuing to disturb our guests I will. Please leave."

I get the sense my gay General Manager will not mind losing her dollars.

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Saturday, May 26, 2007 5:27 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark

(emphasis mine)

yeah that's choice

Once I woke up after a really long drinking binge and the girlfriend was screaming at me as I had apparently taken a shit in the bathtub. I just denied it and got drunk again, and later on vomited into the same bathtub, and the morning after that I had to go to work and decided to run a bath, and I'd forgotten about the vomit and didn't notice until it was all floating on the surface

― dave q, Monday, 14 July 2003 02:18 (7 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

So when we were having a fight about *that*, I said "Well at least I'm not as bad as your friend, whose boyfriend, legend has it, passed out in the bath with the water running, and when your friend noticed water dripping out the ceiling went to check on him and not only found the bathroom flooded but crap floating everywhere as he'd also shit himself and then she had to clean up the whole thing! Heh", and she said "Fuck you"

― dave q, Monday, 14 July 2003 02:22 (7 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

so i hit her

― dave q, Monday, 14 July 2003 02:23 (7 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

that dave q post was classic. all in the comic timing. especially the crucial choice of making "so i hit her" a separate post, which amplified the humor factor.

does dave q still write and/or post here?

last post as dave q=

dave q wrote this on thread Best rock song of 1979: Three Mile Smile or No Surprize? on board I Love Music on May 20, 2007

cheese cake

sadly no xpost

:-(

Some friends of mine are in an underground indie rock band and have completed their first EP. It sounds very professional even if it was mixed on ProTools and recorded in a home studio.

Anywho, they came to me because they know I read a lot of mp3 blogs like ILM and Stereogum. I suggested that they send out music samples to all the major tastemakers, which they did -- but no response as of yet.

Then I found another intriguing option, for $25 they can be the band of the week on Scenestars, a fave mp3 blog of mine:
http://scenestars.net/bandspot/index.php

What do you think, is the exposure worth $25? I mean, they could just post their music on the YSI thread here for free.. Does anyone know how much traffic Scenestars gets or how many downloads they can expect in a week?

I think they should do it as Coldplay, Arctic Monkeys, and CYHSY are all prominently featured and they are looking to do a similar grassroots viral DIY thing to get label attention.

These Scenestar folks have a pretty high profile so some industry people must listen to what their flogging. Do you think journos will take us less seriously if it's a paid promotion? I have mixed feelings, free would be ideal, but they are not in a position to hire a PR person.

thx in advance,
W

-- Wrinklepaws (wrinklepaw...), April 5th, 2006. (1 trackback)
Answers

ILM IS NOT AN MP3 BLOG

-- Special Agent Gene Krupa (dr.carl.saga...), April 5th, 2006.

oh, wrinklepaws

-- cutty (holle...), April 5th, 2006.

omg i never realized oh wrinklepaws was from my lurking days

Conan's already slipped to #2 in Late Night. He drew a 7.1 on his debut and a 2.9 last night (to Dave's 3.4). What a disaster for NBC.

― Cunga, Thursday, June 11, 2009 1:36 AM (1 year ago)

yes, good one

why is this quotable? Was this the beginning of the "what a disaster" meme?

surprisingly it does seem to be the beginning of it

i think this is the source of this ilxmeme?

This is apparantly the "Rocky Horror of furry fandom." I was of the right age to see this on VHS, but I guess I never did...

― Gnip Konop (Whiney G. Weingarten), Saturday, August 15, 2009 6:49 PM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Read that as "Analympics" :(

― sir-mounter (Eric H.), Saturday, August 15, 2009 6:51 PM (22 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i think most people looking for analympics and finding that would be seriously disappointed.

― free jazz and mumia (sarahel), Saturday, August 15, 2009 6:52 PM (21 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

but the thirty people who weren't went off and each made furry conventions. It's the Velvet Undergrowl of the movement.

― BOO LIAR BEN KONOP BOO BAD BOO BEN KONOP BOO (forksclovetofu), Saturday, August 15, 2009 6:54 PM (19 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

why would you say "growl" there

what a horribly formed "joke"!

i didnt even have to look at your name below that to know it was you, dude

― in excelsis ayo (roxymuzak), Saturday, August 15, 2009 7:11 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink