Pitchfork Reviews Reviews

Did anyone here ever read that "Stop Loving Everything" blog? I don't think it really gets updated much anymore. That wasn't explicitly about Pitchfork but that guy spent a LOT of time being snarky about pfork / obsessing about Pitchfork in order to be snarky about it. For whatever it's worth, PRR is more engaging.

My sense is that the guy started in a purely earnest place, but once he got a ton of followers and was written up on the Observer, Post, and Times, he started playing up his own schtick. It's not "purely" earnest any more. Like, he's in his Neon Bible phase.

http://www.pitchforkreviewsreviews.com/post/919066049/haiku-series-about-lil-waynes-blunt-endorsement

Got this in my Twitter feed today

http://predictfork.com/

Guessing Pitchfork meta-commentary is the new commentary?

Here's your chance to see PRR guy in the flesh:

http://www.newyorker.com/arts/events/readings/refresh-refresh-refresh-happy-ending

I can imagine attending that would be a little more edifying, and a little less creepy and awkward, then the time my friend & I went to a John Birch Society meeting, but only just barely.

this thread is like a treasure trove of hilarious ott exaggeration!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9MA0eW8yyw

oops, wrong thread!

works fine here.

Can we get lex a complimentary front-row ticket to see Mr. PRR speaking in the flesh?? PLEASE

at this point i'm only clicking on this thread for the 10% chance that he's finally posted in it

hilarious ott exaggeration!

― elephant rob, Monday, 9 August 2010 21:30 (25 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

speaking of obsessive weirdoes who might have been expected to post in this...

http://predictfork.com

Got this in my Twitter feed today

http://predictfork.com/

Guessing Pitchfork meta-commentary is the new commentary?

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 9 August 2010 13:38 (2 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

http://twitter.com/predictfork

958 Following 95 Followers

looks like they annoyingly followed an insane amount of ppl to try to get attention

sorry d00ds, but i dont think lindsay lohan cares about p4k scores too much

The only thing worse than obsessively reviewing everything Pitchfork does is obsessively trying to predict what Pitchfork will do.

marinating a live cat is worse than both

sour orange and garlic powder help.

Marinating Joanna Newsom

update: this week i am not posting every day or doing the morning roundup. in that new David Foster Wallace interview book, David Foster Wallace explains that he is a TV addict and so he watches too much TV and then after he finishes watching TV he feels sad but he doesn’t know why, and that is how i feel reading everything on pitchfork every day, like every afternoon after i finish reading all the reviews and writing about them i feel sad, so i need to take a few days to not read everything on pitchfork and then this blog will be better because i’ll be enjoying it again

ok, this kid isnt real

he's real enough to answer e-mails

yeah i heard you can't get an e-mail account these days without a social security # and biweekly home inspections

love this guy

perpetua said: All the activities you do, I sometimes wonder if you’re starring in some kind of reality show that will air sometime early next year.

http://www.newyorker.com/arts/events/readings/refresh-refresh-refresh-happy-ending

someone who lives near this thing needs to go & report back

also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New
also this review is smug too but not Smuggest New

i passed a man wearing a shirt that said LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE and that’s how i feel except replace “bad wine” with “smug pitchfork reviews”
i passed a man wearing a shirt that said LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE and that’s how i feel except replace “bad wine” with “smug pitchfork reviews”
i passed a man wearing a shirt that said LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE and that’s how i feel except replace “bad wine” with “smug pitchfork reviews”
i passed a man wearing a shirt that said LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE and that’s how i feel except replace “bad wine” with “smug pitchfork reviews”i passed a man wearing a shirt that said LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE and that’s how i feel except replace “bad wine” with “smug pitchfork reviews”

i will pour a little out for dude when i am smugly drinking whatever the payment for that review affords.

this guy is functionally retarded

wife went to that reading (a pal was also on the line-up), said dude was "really earnest"

i'm shocked, just shocked!

my dad used to have a "LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR BAD WINE" t-shirt

what i don't get is that i took a big steaming dump on zero 7 the other day and dude flipped in the good way. yet i get a throw a little lazy snark at isis and life's too short?

oh god i've fallen down the rabbit hole of trying to figure out the p.r.r. guy.

it's very easy to figure out

1. take someone incredibly stupid, or someone who can accurately portray someone incredibly stupid
2. give him a blog
3. PROFIT

It's not "purely" earnest any more. Like, he's in his Neon Bible phase.

― scott pgwp (pgwp), Saturday, August 7, 2010 10:24 AM (1 week ago) Bookmark

http://s3.amazonaws.com/files.posterous.com/killermelons/pyoCcT4ZPl0HgDRPCJw5OVbgyxZ204WhsM6pYLivi0DOiD5fFx2BoQ3DgKm5/image001.png?AWSAccessKeyId=1C9REJR1EMRZ83Q7QRG2&Expires=1282085572&Signature=vTPxjvglw7ZL0FImuxymCQc%2BKzs%3D

oh for days of the dot.com boom...

okay so when i was in high school i was visiting family friends in california with my mom and they had a home video of me from when i was like six years old and i was at the zoo, and i am walking around on a leash with a little harness around my torso, i guess because i am an only child and my parents didn’t really have experience dealing with kids and i was in the habit of talking to strangers and my parents needed to keep me close in public so i wouldn’t get kidnapped

^solitary posts that effortlessly summarize the spirit of pitchfork reviews reviews

i guess because i am an only child and my parents didn’t really have experience dealing with kids and i was in the habit of talking to strangers and my parents needed to keep me close in public so i wouldn’t get kidnapped

my mom still does this with me.

i'm 42.

haaaaa

http://ripfork.com/2010/08/jess-harvells-review-of-isismelvins-split-by-isis-and-the-melvins/

i almost don't want anyone to tell this guy i'm not a chick. also there are a couple sentences in there that i could REALLY use some help in parsing.

i don't understand that post or why these people are acting like you're the first guy to call isis boring.

whenever i read that ripfork site, especially the grammar grammar critiques and the stuff where this guy unashamedly complains about writers using "big" words unfamiliar to him, i can't help but think of that line from dfw's updike takedown about how it "ends up being embarrassing in the special way something pretentious is embarrassing when it's also wrong."

then mike introduced me to one of the male DJs, he was wearing a purple sparkly American Apparel backpack, and i asked him if i could ask him some questions for my blog and he said yes and i say “what music do you listen to when you’re sad?” and he instantly said “morrissey” and elizabeth whispered “obvious” to me because it was her question and i think she was looking for a less predictable answer. i asked what kind of drugs he did and he said “i’ve never done drugs” and smirked, and then he was like “actually, i do b12!” and he takes a little bottle of b12 out of his backpack and draws some liquid from the bottle with an eyedropper that was attached to the cap and squirts it into his mouth

then i asked him what the going rate was to hire the MisShapes for a night and he said he didn’t talk about money and i said “god, no drugs, no money, you guys are lame” and he laughed and i go, “what’s the craziest night of your life?” and he thought about it for a second and then said “it was this new year’s eve i guess?…” and he pauses and goes, “okay actually i’m lying, i DO do drugs, on new years i ate some quackabees and then took a nice little tour of the city and didn’t get back until the morning.” i don’t know what quackabees are or if i even heard him correctly but i didn’t wanna ask him for clarification on drug slang and look like a herb so i just assumed it was some long-lasting stimulant and kept my mouth shut. then i thanked him and went to try to track down the hors d’oeuvres

Leaving aside their respective turn of phrase, I think what the Ripfork guy does with his time is (not really even being flippant here) more indicative of actual mental instability than the PRR kid - in that he composes long, detailed, regular takedowns of people working in a medium that he appears to have no interest in at all

i'd say the problem is just the opposite: he's got FAR too much interest in it.

#2 by Dave Ohno on August 18, 2010 - 10:59 am

I went to Sunday School with Jessica – I think she matriculated at UM – College Park, but that’s the last I heard from her. Do you know how I can get in touch?

^lawl