most pathetic excuse for wordplay in Young Money's "Bedrock"

4. I can teach you how to speak my language... ROSETTA STONE

5. Two thumbs up... EBERT AND ROEPER

yeah i heard that he toned down the grocery bagginess on the album, good to hear there's some stuff to SMH at besides the stuff we already know from "Over"

smh @ pitchfork today, this album is fucking dogshit

Kanye stans so thirsty they'll drink whatever offbrand Dr. Rocket soda they can get their hands on

Funny because I figured it was part of the whole "THERE'S NO GOOD POP FOR US TO RALLY AROUND ANYMORE" dialogue around Pazz and Jop time which ppl used as a shitty excuse for putting "Girls" songs in the top 10. This is not good pop, and that's coming from a guy who listens to Katy Perry.

6. Presidential suite... BARACK HUSSEIN

lol

shit's so lame...JIMMY IN DEGRASSI

oh my god

7. I made enough for two n***as, boy... STUNT DOUBLE

haha

almost spazzed on someone for being all "8.4 but no BNM?" on Twitter this morning

it's a BM all right

http://blogs.villagevoice.com/music/images/pitchfork.jpg

Drake is the guy you get drinks with who talks about himself for a few hours-- if you're lucky, he might ask you for advice on one or two things. But this is OK because Drake's stories are better than yours. Like the one about how Lil Wayne befriended and signed him at the height of Weezy's powers. Or how he got with Rihanna last year. Or that time he flashed from a Toronto has-been to a top-flight hit maker off the strength of a self-released mixtape. Of course, there's the classic about sipping a few too many glasses of Ace of Spades and asking Nicki Minaj to marry him. Sounds like a sweet existence.

This is a very telling paragraph.

"Did I tell you the one about how I met Lil Wayne and he signed me at the height of his powers?"

"That was back when Weezy had x-ray vision."

If the album had any of those good stories on it, it might be listenable

"i just knew that she was fine... like a ticket on the dash"

http://righthearmedia.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/merriweather.jpg

His relatively progressive and gentlemanly style is contagious, too; on the soon-to-be smash "Fancy", T.I. ditches the "superficial gold-digging bitches" he once praised on songs like "Whatever You Like", instead opting for a single lady with her own BMW and Jaguar in the garage.

that's a real big "relatively" there.

this album seriously got a good review in pfork? or ANYWHERE? what. is going. on. with. "critics".

can I just point out that American indie ppl giving the stamp of approval to a Degrassi alum isn't really all that surprising, at least not to me

like he could have released a single called "I Eat Yr Baby's Entrails After Repeated Rapings" and someone would be talking about his daring satire or some shit

haha the review basically gives that up at the end:

As much as rap is built on artful navel-gazing, it's also founded in struggle. And just as Drake's dramatically exposed selfishness is unique to hip-hop, so are his adversities. He grew up in an affluent Toronto suburb and was graced with everything but a functional pair of parents, who split when he was three. Like Kanye West before him, Drake vies for superstardom while embracing his non-drug-dealing, non-violent, non-dire history-- one that connects with most rap fans in a completely reasonable way. And, suddenly, all that "I" turns into a lot of "we."

idk what degrassi is, but nothing about this album (which i actually gave in and listened to, and most of it is actually just insipid and boring when he's not being the worst lyricist ever) really screamed indie-crit catnip like kanye does even at his worst.

omfgomfg who is the retard who wrote that

i HATE people

Ryan Dombal, but we are all Canadian child actors who prove Kanye West is a horrible role model.

lmao @ lex

Degrassi High is a Canadian television show about sad-sack high school kids and how difficult it is to be a special snowflake, which IMO panders directly to the American indie mindset and generates a lot of slack-cutting where you would least expect, like for example with Drake

all the lines the review quotes, which are typical, are more objectionable to me than straight up "fuck her in the eye" misogyny.

ryan dombal, last time i heard that name was when i had to go in on his atrocious review of the last rihanna album on some other thread. iodfsjfknkjdsdlk'\;:"::"" HATE

I really miss the days when "the american indie mindset" was all about how disgusting a picture Unsane could put on their album cover

like iirc he was virtually victim-blaming her. i assume he's always this terrible?

all the lines the review quotes, which are typical, are more objectionable to me than straight up "fuck her in the eye" misogyny.

b-b-but Drake inspired TI to give up materialistic bitches for the independently wealthy! What could be more refreshing, unexpected and progressive than that?

"I wish I wasn't famous/ I wish I was still in school/ So I could have you in my dorm room/ I would put it on you crazy"

... okay really?

8. I can bring em through and shut em down... ONYX

Guys, I need to go to the emergency room

I think I SMH too hard and sprained something

But even when this Romeo starts tossing dollar bills at a strip club on "Miss Me", his ogling is somehow lonely and level: "I don't judge her but I could never love her/ 'Cause to her I'm just a rapper and soon she'll have met another."

ah if only drake could find a stripper that didn't objectify him

"While all my closest friends out partyin'/ I'm just here makin' the music that they party to," he shrugs on "Light Up". Which all seems very Boy Who Cried Penthouse Suite except that Drake manages to make his plight tugging and relatable thanks to a potent mix of empathy, candidness, and grandeur.

no he doesn't, at least not when you pull shit out of context (and I highly doubt that in context it's any more sympathetic either; it's not like Kanye's "Welcome To Heartbreak" that are full of similar douchebaggery but totals up to "I have all of this shit and still suspect I'm a superficial fraud")

his triangulation of sensitive and braggin' tropes is so dull and plodding idk how a critic can praise it, nor how guys can relate & girls find it dreamy, since the personality painted is smirking sneaky hypocritical douchebag.

ugh "are" should be "is"; point being Kanye > Drake, no matter how much Kanye may suck at times

And, largely thanks to sonic co-conspirators Noah "40" Shebib and Boi-1da, Thank Me Later is held together by misty keyboards and dank drums that recall everyone from Sade to Boards of Canada to Massive Attack to the xx (who are thanked in the record's liner notes).

attn Lex: aside from the Degrassi thing, here's the other reason why dude spooged all over this album

omg I just got to the T.I. part

lolololololol

Drake is the guy you get drinks with who talks about himself for a few hours-- if you're lucky, he might ask you for advice on one or two things. But this is OK because Drake's stories are better than yours. Like the one about how Lil Wayne befriended and signed him at the height of Weezy's powers. Or how he got with Rihanna last year. Or that time he flashed from a Toronto has-been to a top-flight hit maker off the strength of a self-released mixtape. Of course, there's the classic about sipping a few too many glasses of Ace of Spades and asking Nicki Minaj to marry him. Sounds like a sweet existence.

This is a very telling paragraph.

― da croupier, Tuesday, June 15, 2010 10:16 AM (20 minutes ago)

this is like when people defend dane cook

just as Drake's dramatically exposed selfishness is unique to hip-hop

HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD AN EMCEE BEFORE

ahahahahaha

idk how a critic can praise it, nor how guys can relate & girls find it dreamy, since the personality painted is smirking sneaky hypocritical douchebag.

pretty sure the ladies find drake dreamy for the same reason they found rick springfield dreamy. and as for why guys want to identify with a smirking sneaky hypocritical douchebag, well...