Village Voice's F2K

just ftr, that song was based entirely off of a sample stolen from (I believe...?) track 4 off of this:

http://www.amazon.com/Best-Techno-Vol-2/dp/B000000CGX

Isn't this just a remix of Cuban Boys' "Cognoscenti vs. Intelligentsia"...?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iulnYHD5Wg

...which came out in 1999. Of course the sample they both use came from some cartoon, but I don't hear too much difference between this and the "Hampsterdance Song". Both simply loop that sample and but a happy hardcore/handbag beat behind it, with some instructional male vocals.

If it isn't a remix, then the Cuban Boys should sue Hampton the Hamster for stealing their idea.

And if they indeed sue him, Hampton should be represented by this guy:

http://www.greenwichworkshop.com/images/gallery/images/Prints/Bullas/1995legaleag2.jpg

34!

what the hell

That was a slow burn.

more like a slow beating-my-computer-into-good-enough-shape-for-me-to-be-able-to-look-at-web-pages

and of course one of the first things I look at... is that

33!

33 and a turd.

that song should have been "higher" on this list, haha

sure, go ahead, be cruel and hurtful toward a 21 year old from a small town in colorado trying to follow her dreams

you don't even know her!

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha this is an autotune bonanza

like there isn't a single actual note on here that is produced by her

in character

Rolling country 2007 thread

Ah, and now I'm listening to Heidi Montag's blank so-what pasted-on voice singing the silly electro discopop "Body Language" and the vocals have more presence and less distance (is that the word?) than those of anyone I've mentioned in this paragraph except Kelly C.

Wow, autotune.

i'm really starting to understand My Humps not making it.

wtf?? had to pause to make sure all those sounds came from the same place, what a mess

singing the silly electro discopop "Body Language"

That was more of a dis of the other people in that paragraph than it was a ringing endorsement of Heidi Montag's personality, unless you consider "blank so-what pasted-on singing" to be complimentary. Also,"Body Language" sounds nothing at all like "Higher."

...Which is terrible.

except the hills is maybe the best thing on telly

Anyway, this > Chris's relatively mild (for such an obvious target) putdown:

"Fill in the blank:

1) If Heidi Montag's singing didn't sound like she was forcing salt water out through her nose, "No More" would be one of the best singles of the year.

2) Despite her sounding like she's forcing salt water out through her nose, Heidi Montag's "No More" is one of the best singles of the year.

3) Heidi Montag's "No More" is one of the best singles of the year, and one of the reasons for this is that she sounds like she's forcing salt water out through her nose.

(I am wavering between choices 1 and 2. If I were ever to shift to choice 3, this would probably mean that I have entered a new psychosocial life stage, such as _______.)"

32!

sometimes i feel bad for not saying something smart like the rest of you guys about music. this, however, is not one of those times:

lolololololololololololololololololololololololololetc

this makes me regret ever saying anything positive about Smashmouth, ever

"The 50 Worst Songs of the '00s That No One Would Ever Have Heard If We Hadn't Linked To Them"

huge lol at the last line

I am coming by to say thank you again. So awesome this list.

Though I did lose a friend to BrokeNCYDE. He listened to "Bree Bree" about fifty times trying to figure out why it exists and now likes it.

^^^a real warning^^^

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU42iWcvTCg

^ jon lovitz harmonica solo around 1:30

from whiney:

can you tell dan and ned and kshighway thanks for the support
and also,
I'm proud that, thanks to hoot smalley, the same ilx thread has accused the list of being too obvious and too obscure

Good work to Whiney finding pretty much the worst of the Disneymania tracks after all -- having a hard time topping. (Most of them are at least nearly competent.) Also not fair to fault songs that I hate that aren't done quite as ear-bleedingly badly.

Some other contenders, though:

Hilary Duff - The Tiki Tiki Room
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6An_3ehvsBc

Plain White T's - When I See an Elephant Fly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nD6jNjJGbLo

Fan_3 = It's a Small World After All <--winner for my money
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3p57GkvH6EE

Disney Channel Stars - Circle of Life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRGUNBOeUOk

Woops, forgot Jonas Bros.'s version of "Yo Ho (Pirates Life for Me)."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q29Y12mB1oE

my one big gripe about this list so far is that about half the of it is actual bad songs written in the '00s, and the rest is just distasteful covers/samples/appropriations of stuff from the 20th century that was actually good once upon a time

Jonas Bros.'s version of "Yo Ho (Pirates Life for Me)."

^^^ why do we live in a world where such things exist

I'm really wishing more of them went out on limbs, instead of just pointing fingers at crap that 99 percent of the audience is obviously already going to have no use for, thus confirming their superiority over all the theoretical morons out there who don't (and probably forgot about these songs years ago anyway). (Haven't been following the comments at all, but have any of the choices provoked much argument? Moldy Peaches, maybe?) But maybe all the TV On The Radio and Radiohead and Bob Dylan songs finish higher on the list; we'll see.

Definitely could use some counter-challops to the F2K choices so far, but I think the list is a good starting point. (I have a feeling there will be some representative controversial indie or crossover pop track or whatever else higher in the list -- top half for the obvious choices, bottom half for more controversial but more important/interesting ones? TIME WILL TELL.)

Worst Songs list is going to involve shooting fish in a barrel. Radiohead and TV on the Radio didn't make anything TOTALLY FUCKING AWFUL and it would just smell of mouldy challops imo.

Wrong. They both made plenty of songs worse than, say, "Kryptonite."

I meant: "...all the theoretical morons who do (have a use for etc.)..."

Like, when is that awful John Wayne Gacy song by Soofjam going to show up? PASTE'S #1 HAS OUR FIFTH WORST SONG ON IT.

Wrong. They both made plenty of songs worse than, say, "Kryptonite."

hahaha no they didn't, come on

I think any Worst Of... list has to be a good amount of challops by default, anyway. If you're not going to say anything interesting about something be the worst of something, what's the point?

(Anyway, if not those artists I named specifically, then artists "like" them. My point is that not all of a decade's worst music is made by bands and singers that people "in the know" already hate. Though, like dabug said, maybe the more interesting picks are coming up later.)

That sentence almost makes sense. Oh well. Anyway, I think it's a lot harder to dislike stuff than to like or ignore it (we tend to ignore stuff we don't generally like), so to truly be the worst, it has to be kind of special and, by definition, a bit more idiosyncratic than "bests" tend to be.

(Well, I tend to ignore stuff I don't generally like, but I don't spend a ton of time consciously hating on music; not worth my time for the most part.)

xhuxk otm. And let's retire "challops" already, unless you really believe that any opinion that deviates from bs consensus is bad faith contrarianism.

Well, lots of times the stuff we hate most is stuff that other people stupidly think is great. (And if that necessitates "challops", so what?

bad faith contrarianism

Does challops really suggest "bad faith"? I know it can, but I always just saw it as just-plain-contrarianism, if obvious.