THE WORST NME COVER OF ALL TIME

That's a strangely horrible bit of handwriting on that cover.

"JOE STRUMMER by JAMIE T"

Was Jamie T the cuntbox who wrote something about Strummer for some real newspaper last year, and made the entire piece about how most people don't know this obscure song Train In Vain and so don't appreciate the soft, sensitive, yearning way in which Strummer could sing when he wanted you to feel his pain?

yep why not, Salem are one of the most exciting and interesting emerging bands, when their debut album drops in 2010 prepare for greatness.

Music magazines should set their own agenda, not recycle established retro icons or wait and follow others for new artists.

the average 17 year old NME reading teenager in 2009, was a toddler when Kurt Cobain blew his head off in 1994, so how could they miss him?

Dunno but there were enough moonfaced tools with a Jim Morrison boner in my sixth form 11 or 12 years ago, so this is hardly a new or NME-created thing

it happened with buddy holly in the 60s too
"the day music died"

in a parallel universe, Sounds or Melody Maker is still being published and Ulver are on the front cover this week.

Of all the billions of eventualities in billions of parallel universes, that's certainly the one I'd most like to end up in.

djmartian should be editor of Terrorizer

In a parallel universe, he is.

In a world where Portsmouth have won double the number of games.

Ulver are on the cover but HITLER is both NME editor and Pompey chairman

Parallel universe aspirations:

1. Ulver on cover of Sounds
2. Portsmouth top of the Premiership
3. DJ Martian married to Jet from Gladiators

4. Cadbury indulge in 40% less 'brand extension'

5. No such thing as £1.50 lottery ticket

6. Strictly Come Darkwave rules the ratings.

Strictly Come Darkwave

OMG.

dancing the batcave dance tonight...

Siouxsie and the Banshees - Arabian Knights
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YP-ZUbSmkRM

I like the way the NME old popstars thing excitably lists all these addictions and tragedies as a way of explaining why a bunch of guys look about 20 years older than they did 20 years ago.

7. plans for 2010 general election scrapped and new government elected according to Rateyourmusic positions; My Dying Bride settle gingerly into new role as MP for Knowsley South

(Adam Ant actually looks about 5 years older on his!)

8. David Cameron forced to stand down after having got 51 SB nominations from party MPs after voting "happiness is a warm gun" the worst song on the White Album.

Yeah, I dunno what they've got against Wendy James either, we can't all look 12 for ever like Conor M

9. New Kerrrang! editor Matty Taylor vows that Muse have graced the cover for the last time

10. Elizabeth Fraser enters Eurovision and wins it

11. Jools Holland Later gets canned, and is replaced by a new version of Snub TV

12. the BBC revamps 6 Music with a radical new direction

13. DJ Martian standing on the Pyramid Stage for two hours ringing a bell really loudly while singing "play up Pompey" is hailed by Michael Eavis as the greatest Glastonbury headliner since Radiohead in 1997.

+PLUS+

14. That arse from Biffy Clyro puts his fucking shirt on for once.

Tempted to start a generic indie guitar band called +PLUS+ just so I can claim I'm on the cover every week.

That "then and now" article is hilarious.

"age and a recent alcohol addiction have washed away most of his youthful good looks."

No, really? Age rid him of his youth?

http://kayascodelario.net/photos/albums/magazines/2009/02_NME/Kaya_Scodelario_001.jpg

wasn't there an entire thread dedicated to that cover?

L-R: Ant, Dec, Severed Head

Posting this here so i can find it at a later date as no doubt i will forget which thread it was in and this will be the 1st one i search :)

http://i49.tinypic.com/14xm992.jpg

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Media/Pix/pictures/2009/12/15/1260874129094/NME-Christmas-2009-issue-006.jpg

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN A NEW LEADER EMERGES. It's the chest hair that does it.

come back conor mcnichols, a certain amount is forgiven.

That is your God.

Also, this just in: THE CLASH WERE A BAND.

That is your God.

Yes exactly and I dunno: that is actually a half-decent cover with some clarity, as opposed to the unfocusable-upon clutterfest I expect... ok it's just been shuffled westwards on the page I suppose, hold left hand over baubles and I say it looks not bad at all...

I read the Cowell interview earlier and he comes off as pretty reasonable really - I hope no-one had their fingers crossed it was gonna be a monstering because it's nothing of the sort

He's coated off every interviewer that's sat with him. Even Clarkson!

not really the worst

but

http://www.nme.com/images/10322_164604_mumfordandsons_nmecoverL220310.jpg

at least the whole approach of the cover is 'cleaner' than they used to do a few years ago.

actually, please replace years with months

eg that skins cover upthread.

New editor seems to have changed a great deal of the mag.

Although, a greater reliance on 'archive reprints'.

SO, is there an extended (or even a small) tribute to AChilton?

looking at that cover it's difficult to tell

oh look one of them's wearing a newton heath man u fan scarf! what a hero!

abysmal

Yeah that cover looks like any number of em from like 1996, sucky band but perfectly OK other than that imo

-the period in the subtitle
-the newton heath scarf
-'big star's underground icon'
-the big pink suede panda bear hurts
-the cunts in the picture whoever they are
-countryside realness shit

thx