Innocuous things that make you irrationally embarrassed

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because, for me, embarrassment is a much more common reaction than anger

congratulations (n/a), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:24 (four years ago) Permalink

e.g. when people respond to comedians' tweets or (especially) instagrams with "funny" comments

congratulations (n/a), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:25 (four years ago) Permalink

any type of performance that requires being HAPPY! in a really showy way (which means i can't watch any singing/dancing-based reality show)

congratulations (n/a), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:33 (four years ago) Permalink

eating in public

Shane Breen is a gigantic tool (Noodle Vague), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:35 (four years ago) Permalink

trying on clothes in department stores

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:44 (four years ago) Permalink

being introduced to new people

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:44 (four years ago) Permalink

"mingling" at parties

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:45 (four years ago) Permalink

every single episode of breaking bad

ledge, Monday, 26 November 2012 16:45 (four years ago) Permalink

taking cyrus in to school in the morning. and its not just me, half the people in there could teach a master class on avoiding eye contact.

scott seward, Monday, 26 November 2012 16:47 (four years ago) Permalink

god yeah, i frantically hunt the playground for the 2 or 3 people i can talk to

Shane Breen is a gigantic tool (Noodle Vague), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:48 (four years ago) Permalink

being around my dad when he talks to anybody in a shop, pub etc

Shane Breen is a gigantic tool (Noodle Vague), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:49 (four years ago) Permalink

i could list these things all day but i am too embarrassed

passion it person (La Lechera), Monday, 26 November 2012 16:53 (four years ago) Permalink

i used to get embarrassed when my dad would ramble on and never listen to the person trying to talk to him but now i don't care. i'm just glad he's still alive so i just watch him and smile. its like watching a big demented baby talk to people. who is hard of hearing. and who listens to jazz all day long and reads the wall street journal. okay, that's a really weird baby...

scott seward, Monday, 26 November 2012 16:59 (four years ago) Permalink

guys trying to flirt on facebook, publicly

I have done bad. I love my pj's. (zachlyon), Monday, 26 November 2012 18:05 (four years ago) Permalink

People who comment on the food I am eating, or have just ordered. A truly irrational pet peeve.

One Way Ticket on the 1277 Express (Bill Magill), Monday, 26 November 2012 18:31 (four years ago) Permalink

People trying to impress their favourite musicians on facebook by posting fawning comments. It's even worse in real life. Note : I have done both of these things myself.

it's all fuck what sit says, we'll do our own thing (Matt #2), Monday, 26 November 2012 18:34 (four years ago) Permalink

i told kim gordon that i really liked the harry crews album when i was drunk years ago. #bigfatliar

scott seward, Monday, 26 November 2012 18:41 (four years ago) Permalink

eating chobani yogurt fills me with disgust and self hatred, but i like this one flavor so much that i will suffer through the shame to eat it.

passion it person (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:41 (four years ago) Permalink

why does it make you feel that way? also, which flavor?

xanthanguar (cwkiii), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:44 (four years ago) Permalink

passion fruit

1) the name is so focus grouped that it makes me ashamed to say it, or even think about it
2) yogurt is for woman, and i am a woman
3) stirring up the fruit from the bottom is the worst sound on earth
4) i have long had an aversion to watching people eat yogurt, it's at least 20 years old
5) do i need another reason?

passion it person (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:48 (four years ago) Permalink

all completely valid reasons! especially #1; that's one of those words i do anything to avoid saying, and if i absolutely must say it, i involuntarily shudder.
passion fruit is one of the best flavors, though. recently i've been buying cabot greek yogurt which is cheaper and way better, but doesn't come in the individual sized cups so i can't bring it to work.

xanthanguar (cwkiii), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:51 (four years ago) Permalink

i hate this brand of yogurt so much that i have thought about ways to create my own passion fruit yogurt by making the pulp myself and freezing it in little individual tubes so that it defrosts by lunchtime and i can enjoy my yogurt with peace of mind.

passion it person (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:55 (four years ago) Permalink

empty shops/restaurants that are clearly struggling for business

Ward Fowler, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 15:55 (four years ago) Permalink

people baby-talking to their kids, especially if it's about their faeces.

people pronouncing things wrong. my favourite is when people ask for the beer "bombardier" (pronounced in the ww2 spiffing way) and say "bombard-e-ay" in the french way, just a perfect failure. (i definitely pronounce things wrong myself, obv, sometimes, and then get even more embarrassed)

Heterocyclic ring ring (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:47 (four years ago) Permalink

i heard a mom at the grocery store ask her toddler "do you wanna do oj or peach mango?"
kid in the cart: "let's do oj"

me: shame at having overheard that, it was just too personal and also since when did little kids say "let's do _____" when they want something?!?!

passion it person (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:54 (four years ago) Permalink

live theatre :-/

Still S.M.D.H. ft. (will), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:54 (four years ago) Permalink

i think you mean bad live theatre

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:58 (four years ago) Permalink

there is *a lot* of bad live theatre though, so yeah

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:58 (four years ago) Permalink

Cartoon characters on generic products.

xanthanguar (cwkiii), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:59 (four years ago) Permalink

hockey players in advertisements

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 16:59 (four years ago) Permalink

overheard conversations

Heterocyclic ring ring (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:01 (four years ago) Permalink

generally

Heterocyclic ring ring (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:01 (four years ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOrvdvczpEA

mookieproof, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:02 (four years ago) Permalink

improv

congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:03 (four years ago) Permalink

People who comment on the food I am eating, or have just ordered. microwaving.. A truly irrational pet peeve.

"ooh, that smells nice..."

DO YOU WANT SOME?????

Mark G, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:05 (four years ago) Permalink

there is *a lot* of bad live theatre though, so yeah

painfully true. but i do tend to be irrationally embarrassed by people ~acting~ in a live setting, regardless of the quality of performance/ production. the closer they are to me physically, the more embarrassed i get.

Still S.M.D.H. ft. (will), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:05 (four years ago) Permalink

improv comedy or improv anything?

passion it person (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:05 (four years ago) Permalink

comedy i guess? i'm not sure what other kinds of improv i'd run into

congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:06 (four years ago) Permalink

omg hahaaaa, mooks knows what i'm talking about
that clip is practically canadian
xps

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:06 (four years ago) Permalink

http://youtu.be/vDggoBZ2A48

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:17 (four years ago) Permalink

though the wayne gretzky ones of the 80s/90s were prob worse and more ubiquitous...

obliquity of the ecliptic (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:18 (four years ago) Permalink

Everything I say and everything I do.

Just noise and screaming and no musical value at all. (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:31 (four years ago) Permalink

irish politics

bill paxman (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:41 (four years ago) Permalink

Oh man. When I correct someone, or answer a question earnestly, and then immediately realise they were only joking. I guess it's rational to feel some embarrassment about that, but probably not rational to feel so much shame I just want to leave work straight away, get the train home, run upstairs to a cupboard, turn out the light and hide under every bit of linen I can find.

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 17:58 (four years ago) Permalink

stop correcting ppl, it's ama awful habit, even when they're wrong. get home.

bill paxman (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:00 (four years ago) Permalink

*points out typo*

*kills self*

Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:12 (four years ago) Permalink

witnessing people bragging

homosexual II, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:42 (four years ago) Permalink

good one

mookieproof, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:43 (four years ago) Permalink

I probably embarrass people when I temporarily bond with sales people (usually at the cosmetics counter).

homosexual II, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:45 (four years ago) Permalink

empty shops/restaurants that are clearly struggling for business

I end up never even going into these places since I know that if I go in and start browsing I will feel obligated to buy something because I feel bad about their business not doing well.

I don't really feel embarrassed or anything though, this is just expensive sympathy.

silverfish, Wednesday, 5 December 2012 18:48 (four years ago) Permalink

It makes me tidy up the kitchen and toys from around the house and put washing away, clear up dirty dishes which is no bad thing. I don't actually clean though apart from the things I know she won't do...

kinder, Monday, 6 November 2017 22:24 (one week ago) Permalink

people making simplistic analogies between big real news and nerd culture bullshit

na (NA), Tuesday, 7 November 2017 19:52 (one week ago) Permalink

nerd culture bullshit

niels, Tuesday, 7 November 2017 19:53 (one week ago) Permalink

i don't think it's a big deal, you tidy up your place so that the cleaner can clean without having to move things around or bump into things etc

brimstead, Tuesday, 7 November 2017 19:56 (one week ago) Permalink

uh the cleaning thing i mean

brimstead, Tuesday, 7 November 2017 19:56 (one week ago) Permalink

Elaborately intricate Stranger Things fan art

Mince Pramthwart (James Morrison), Wednesday, 8 November 2017 02:03 (one week ago) Permalink

people who immediately jump to "my computer/phone is listening to my conversations" in discussions about social network/advertising privacy

after reading a thorough article detailing all the ways data actually is, provably and sometimes publicly disclosed to be collected, there's a top comment saying "I'm sure my phone is listening to what I say to serve ads"

sitting here cringing, there's a whole article just above your comment explaining how this is unlikely

mh, Wednesday, 8 November 2017 16:59 (one week ago) Permalink

I posted a song suggestion to Beyond Yacht Rock's patreon but accidentally posted the wrong youtube. Clearly suicide is the only way to salvage this situation.

Daniel_Rf, Wednesday, 8 November 2017 17:26 (one week ago) Permalink

haha I know how that feels

niels, Wednesday, 8 November 2017 21:17 (one week ago) Permalink

The Netflix practice of rolling out a whole series in one go a) making online discussions impossible for anyone who hasn't binged the whole lot in one go and b) loading the entire internet with instant spoilers.

(currently on Stranger Things s02e04)

Chunky Backgammon (onimo), Thursday, 9 November 2017 13:23 (one week ago) Permalink

yeah, part of the fun of serialized television is the waiting time between episodes where you can discuss the show with other people. Netflix has taken out the social aspect of tv watching, which is something that I'll miss very much.

Most of the fun of LOST back in the day was the crazy time travel discussions I had with other people who were following the show. This wouldn't have been possible if they just dumped out entire seasons at once.

(I guess I should be irrationally embarrassed by all time I spend thinking about time travel in science fiction, but I'm not.)

silverfish, Thursday, 9 November 2017 16:13 (one week ago) Permalink

I'm embarrassed that I posted that to the embarrassed instead of the angry thread.

Chunky Backgammon (onimo), Thursday, 9 November 2017 17:53 (one week ago) Permalink

People who seem incapable of being anything other than completely sincere and guileless. Like, I don't know how to comport myself around someone who isn't at least a little tinged with cynicism.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 13:45 (one week ago) Permalink

I like those people.

Terry Micawber (Tom D.), Friday, 10 November 2017 13:54 (one week ago) Permalink

I don't dislike those people, they just make me IE.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:01 (one week ago) Permalink

Like, I GET IT, PEOPLE, I'M BROKEN, STOP REMINDING ME.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:01 (one week ago) Permalink

conversely, have known a few people who seem incapable of communicating without some layer of irony and sarcasm and they are absolutely exhausting to be around

circa1916, Friday, 10 November 2017 14:04 (one week ago) Permalink

and when i see something like "fluent in sarcasm" on a dating profile or w/e it's an immediate NOPE

circa1916, Friday, 10 November 2017 14:04 (one week ago) Permalink

haha yeah

that and Interests: Working out

niels, Friday, 10 November 2017 14:06 (one week ago) Permalink

Yes to both of those turn-offs, for sure.

There has to be a balance of sincerity and sarcasm for me to feel comfortable. The people who are SO sincere that they don't seem to 'get' humor make me feel like I'm talking to aliens.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:18 (one week ago) Permalink

But yes, people with perma-Dreamworks-face can fuck off.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:19 (one week ago) Permalink

Weirdest thing is when one of the completely sweet and sincere marry one of the completely cynical. I've seen this happen twice: first one was a disaster and I'm still not sure I believe it happened (I met them both after they'd split up). Second one works really well and perhaps the cynical guy isn't as cynical as he liked to make out.

kinder, Friday, 10 November 2017 14:36 (one week ago) Permalink

haha i'm one of those people who never gets jokes

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:51 (one week ago) Permalink

is that why you prefixed your comment with a precautionary laugh?

attention vampire (MatthewK), Friday, 10 November 2017 14:58 (one week ago) Permalink

idk probably! also because i thought "haha" when i read about finding those people (my people) embarrassing
tbrri think a lot of things i do could be things other people find embarrassing tbh but that doesn't stop me.

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:00 (one week ago) Permalink

I think there's some overlap between the indefatigably-sincere and eternally-optimistic. Now I'm thinking of a neighbor who absolutely refuses to allow anyone to get away with saying anything self-negating, to the extent that she doesn't seem to pick up on humorous self-effacement. I was mentioning some small town where I was going for a weekend getaway and said in the driest tone imaginable that it was probably a murder town where I was going to get murdered and she was like, oh don't say that, I'm sure you'll be fine! And I was like...yes, I'm sure I'll be fine, too.

It's entirely likely that most of the problem here is mine.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:00 (one week ago) Permalink

This was all prompted by a coworker giving an unprompted gift to another coworker who's a veteran along with this very sincere show of gratitude for his service to the country, etc. And it was all very nice! And there's nothing at all wrong with it! And it made me so irrationally embarrassed!

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:03 (one week ago) Permalink

it is becoming clear that you find sincerity embarrassing
personally, i do not! i like it.

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:04 (one week ago) Permalink

Mmm, that's really not it, because I really can't get with people who have no capacity for sincerity. I think it's that I find people who seem incapable of anything but sincerity embarrassing.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:08 (one week ago) Permalink

I feel like some of the context is lost by reducing this to a single moment. These are guys (very nice guys, I hasten to add!) who have long and involved conversations about e.g. the variety of delicious offerings at TGI Friday's.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:12 (one week ago) Permalink

those people sound boring not sincere

weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:13 (one week ago) Permalink

Oh yes, unquestionably, but it's their earnest enthusiasm for mundanity which leaves the most indelible impression. Like, whether the topic of conversation is live action Disney films of the '90s or documentaries about bridges, they are deeply engaged and present.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:24 (one week ago) Permalink

People who seem incapable of being anything other than completely sincere and guileless. Like, I don't know how to comport myself around someone who isn't at least a little tinged with cynicism.

― Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, November 10, 2017 5:45 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

many of these people are drowning in cynicism, the outward appearance is a survival mechanism, speaking from experience

brimstead, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:28 (one week ago) Permalink

just sayin

brimstead, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:28 (one week ago) Permalink

Yeah, I always wonder whether there's something under the surface that I'm just not seeing. Like maybe a proclivity for strangling people in secluded rest areas. Because I'm cynical! And can't just let people have their childlike wonder and subtext-free meaningful interactions!

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 15:36 (one week ago) Permalink

that is also a problem

the cynicism I encounter that irritates me is a problem because it's the default mode of operation and I get the impression people sometimes don't have an actual opinion they can articulate, they just have this disconnected cynicism

until you accidentally stumble on something they really do have an opinion on, and then they genuinely become irritated

mh, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:39 (one week ago) Permalink

um we just cry at home generally lol

brimstead, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:40 (one week ago) Permalink

xp

brimstead, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:40 (one week ago) Permalink

brimstead also otm, defaulting to cynicism is a defense mechanism

I like defaulting to ambivalence, makes life much easier

mh, Friday, 10 November 2017 15:40 (one week ago) Permalink

i feel like i am similar to old lunch but these days i tend to be more annoyed at my own cynicism and jealous of people who are capable of being sincere

na (NA), Friday, 10 November 2017 16:17 (one week ago) Permalink

we old

mh, Friday, 10 November 2017 16:22 (one week ago) Permalink

Yeah, I mean the key thing here is recognizing the irrationality of my embarrassment. It's reactionary because unbridled sincerity too often disarms me and leaves me feeling, y'know, feelings and stuff. The wizened shell of the crank often shelters a tender heart. Or whatever. Shut up.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 16:33 (one week ago) Permalink

It makes me IE that old lunch has to continually explain his IE. This is neither sincere nor sarcastic.

Jeff, Friday, 10 November 2017 16:43 (one week ago) Permalink

When two people recognize each other on a train and start a conversation but aren’t close together so they end up talking through people.

Jeff, Friday, 10 November 2017 22:28 (one week ago) Permalink

Okay, wait, let me try to explain this again...

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 22:37 (one week ago) Permalink

Both of Jeff's examples are on point. Similar to the second is that thing where you run into someone you barely know on the train and you exchange pleasantries followed by 45 minutes of the interpersonal equivalent of not knowing what to do with your hands.

Fresh Toast (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 November 2017 22:40 (one week ago) Permalink

Right! Like can I put my headphones on and look at my phone now!
?

Jeff, Friday, 10 November 2017 22:55 (one week ago) Permalink

I just realised my most IE thing. Seeing people on TV shows like Rogue Traders, or politicians, however dispicable, get collared by reporters/TV show hosts with a bunch of cameramen and the ensuing walkaway chase plus "I'm just looking for answers, why haven't you responded to my enquiries" dialogue, usually resulting in someone getting in a car or hiding in a cupboard.
I just find it excrutiating for everyone concerned.

kinder, Friday, 10 November 2017 22:55 (one week ago) Permalink

Oh I hate those too. And I'm usually on the reporter's side!

We had... a big long difficult problem with our school district last year. Still do. They put our elementary school on the chopping block, and our PTA organized this opposition that had us going to all of these neighborhood "town square" meetings in force.

It went well, and it's something I've used to be positive about the current affairs of my state and country. But that first meeting, Lord. It was a year ago, the day after the fucking election. I'm like one of three white parents in this room full of people staring down the white superintendent. There's all this tension, and after the superintendent concludes his little powerpoint presentation, one of the other white parents stands up immediately and goes "SUPERINTENDENT [CHALMERS], BOB FRESCO OF THE MIDWAY NEIGHBORHOOD ASSOCIATION. WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO RELEASE THE NAMES OF THE ---" and starts going on about something that HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH CLOSING SCHOOLS.

I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed because I looked like I could've voted for Trump. I was embarrassed because I looked like one of the kinds of people pulling their kids out of the district. And finally, I was embarrassed because I thought people might associate me with that granola yoo-hoo shouting from the corner.

I guess I don't like confrontation?

pplains, Saturday, 11 November 2017 02:48 (one week ago) Permalink

<3

mookieproof, Saturday, 11 November 2017 05:14 (one week ago) Permalink


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