why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

Yeah, I wore unsuitable shoes for driving one time and had to take them off. Driving without shoes was really uncomfortable and unpleasant. Also of course nobody can see your feet when you drive. Have they even remotely thought this through?

https://pics.me.me/mesmerizing-quotes-shakespeare-said-i-always-feel-happy-you-know-27831056.png

mesmerizing

That's not iambic pentameter

There's a sofa advert on at the moment where Owen Wilson makes up some bullshit Shakespeare quote and I can't work out if it's supposed to be ironic or if the writer was an idiot or if the writer assumes the viewers are idiots

straight lolling at these, good work thread

Before you love, hurl. If you blow chunks & she comes back, she’s yours.

p sure that quote is Christopher Marlowe or Bob Marley

Che Guevara, right?

- Bobson Dugnutt

https://scontent-ort2-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/28795164_10155735279440376_2022689799967401603_n.jpg?oh=cba81f519cf83bf4be52aa900620a44b&oe=5B39FF07

I regret to inform you that the gangs and criminals are at it again

when u get out of ur car you will become an unwilling participant in a new form of criminal endeavour called 'the knockout game'

pls liek adn share

Thanks to frogbs for not being selfish. Our vision will maintain high percentage as a result.

When you go outside to find that someone has toiled papered your tree, do not climb tree to remove toilet paper. Snipers are waiting in the hedges.

Official msg from police

there is a sickness out there, lurking in the heart of the sharers

A spectre is haunting europe. The spectre of rainbow parties

https://scontent-lax3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/fr/cp0/e15/q65/28277193_1748820691897219_3476090436404994424_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&efg=eyJpIjoidCJ9&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeHJ109YpnFaCyajUvuzsZx4ijHRTcjrDXIiCepYUy4QKNk2wJB-t0LhcHOuJ-ssSRKH0vnQQA0G7lOHUrF6TEBfpyONOJk_E7ve5tlu4U-pSA&oh=771ceeeb7c8623e4136ab971200ce611&oe=5B424B02

Brown Eyed People Eater by Sheb Morrison

- Van Morrison

Share If You Have A Brown eye

in the coffee shop, the mememaker realizes they have the ultimate shareable image - there are literally billions of people with brown eyes. this is going to be huuuuuuuuuge

nippled people are quite a force to be reckoned with. they are straight shooters and honest to the point to be intimidating by those who arent used to such open honesty! nippled people are faithful friend, but only allow a few lucky people in their circle. nippled people are not pretenders, they exemplify the saying "What you see is what you get". Share if you have nipples.

hang on, shots fired

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/8d/90/c4/8d90c449ac95db6434f7cdae04fd966c.jpg

As a brown eyed person I can confirm that I'm content with achieving your baseline pleasure standards at best.

the subtext of that is clearly referencing the fact that there is no such thing as blue eyes

steve_bannon.jpg

my mum posted this

https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/fr/cp0/e15/q65/28577607_1556509254398155_8150854248469364736_n.jpg?efg=eyJpIjoidCJ9&oh=a34f5c7e7e2d05f5821f3d55bf29c198&oe=5B3DEFE2

sorry man

I knew you got your fb posting habits somewhere

blocked

i wish there was a chrome extension that blocked FB posts with screenshot blocks of text

i don't know why this was such a brain teaser to me when i saw it today on FB but it really was.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/6e/84/9e/6e849eb06ed8f1ac10bb3a2eba2ad1ad.png

i'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy

https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t31.0-8/fr/cp0/e15/q65/28953884_10156134885856704_7380798716424110384_o.jpg?_nc_cat=0&efg=eyJpIjoidCJ9&oh=f82e734feddd4256c6e54d72fe0b9e94&oe=5B2B8445

And if you do, fill up their food bowl and bring the trash to curb if you could? I'll be downstairs playing League of Legends DO NOT DISTURB thanks.

that meme makes it sound like she actually doesn't know who her relatives are

"hey if any of you is my father, please raise your hand. because I can't remember who you are and I want to tell little Ike who to expect socks from at Christmas"

The future is a cartoon avatar of ourselves passing along passive aggressive messages to relatives who sign into Facebook once a year.

when you're a cartoon they let you say it

https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29541453_10216203705188111_8689052191993299293_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeE-479KzS0Q51nWkb4Stdl33wycgxtm_2r-MtN8yOrwmICg4M9cDIeBkuP8Z1yYLgAcIODTfE36Ipz7VeZ0eh2BzMWRjw7B154AO7lc-5wUYg&oh=4ddc2431429d7e7f64035b7ec0444649&oe=5B73224B

that was your first mistake you took your lucky break and broke it in two

just like other girls, i'm not like other girls

That one sounds like something the girl from firestarter would say just before igniting you.

they all say that

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t31.0-8/fr/cp0/e15/q65/12493952_10153208792881218_4458112944814760863_o.jpg?_nc_cat=0&efg=eyJpIjoidCJ9&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeE-b4ZV04wZVJ__VY3VjYbESfqej7mRe9Le1eDGT9GuG1oJl5IKOS8rgR-AECiH2e3JZ_66IlhfszAjQXPa9kpD41MUkBU-8ZHtIjzMH0oi4Q&oh=c783e2ff38042ae76bd097e9b5306e8d&oe=5B3D13F5

can't fuck w/ Aristotle

not sure Aristotle had a word for workaholism, but he was the original centrist dad it's true

Indeed no greek word for "proper ambition"

https://larvalsubjects.files.wordpress.com/2017/10/table-of-virtues-and-vices.png

xp as has been discussed on ilx previously, he was the og of mor