rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

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http://i.imgur.com/7siqm.jpg

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 10:48 (eight years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/qeSY7.png

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 10:50 (eight years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/BWQ2l.jpg

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 10:51 (eight years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/z6zhx.jpg

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 10:51 (eight years ago) link

gonna be an important thread for future historians i feel

me so fat (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Friday, 15 June 2012 11:20 (eight years ago) link

feel like you could shop the open end of that p'zolo onto goatse and no one would notice

me so fat (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Friday, 15 June 2012 11:21 (eight years ago) link

wow the p'zolo is huge. truly something to behold.

lamborghini persie (J0rdan S.), Friday, 15 June 2012 12:25 (eight years ago) link

it's kind of maddening. i mean if pizza hut and these other places would just take all the $$ they are presumably putting into r&d or whatever it's called in the fast food/chain restaurant world and instead put it towards quality ingredients with the aim of making simple (if greazy) good ol' fashioned pizza, then their products would be edible, something like they last were decades ago. the drive for novelty has become increasingly silly to the point where, when i opened this thread i momentarily thought these were just some jokey ideas that dayo or another person had photoshopped. the p'zolo things just look nightmarish. are they using half-starved drug-addled homeless ppl for their test-marketing subjects or what?

dell (del), Friday, 15 June 2012 13:26 (eight years ago) link

even mcdonald's has more dignity

dell (del), Friday, 15 June 2012 13:28 (eight years ago) link

A COOL COLLISION OF SALTY SWEAT

blossom smulch (schlump), Friday, 15 June 2012 13:36 (eight years ago) link

just bought a bacon sundae fyi

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 16:55 (eight years ago) link

did it come with a decorative piece of bacon sticking out?

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Friday, 15 June 2012 16:57 (eight years ago) link

this is obvious but this is a direct correlation to the emphasis on drawing hits on websites instead of reporting news/doing actual journalism - these food products (see also the pizza with hot dogs in the crust) get the restaurants press coverage, draw in consumers who just want to try the products so they can say they tried them - it's all about boosting numbers

congratulations (n/a), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:02 (eight years ago) link

edible memes

congratulations (n/a), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:04 (eight years ago) link

consume the thing that consumes you

congratulations (n/a), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:04 (eight years ago) link

did it come with a decorative piece of bacon sticking out?

they
give you one big slice and then a bunch of bits

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:07 (eight years ago) link

wow, that bacon thing is real?!

game of crones (La Lechera), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:08 (eight years ago) link

how times have changed

game of crones (La Lechera), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:08 (eight years ago) link

I could see the bk burger artist asking his manager on how many slices of bacon to put in the sundae

un® (dayo), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:11 (eight years ago) link

holding out for a vegan version with tofutti or soy delicious and some of those imitation bacon bits

dell (del), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:34 (eight years ago) link

this is obvious but this is a direct correlation to the emphasis on drawing hits on websites instead of reporting news/doing actual journalism - these food products (see also the pizza with hot dogs in the crust) get the restaurants press coverage, draw in consumers who just want to try the products so they can say they tried them - it's all about boosting numbers

yeah i reckon that's so but it still seems absurdly short-sighted. but whatever. capitalism in the nineties. or whatever decade this is

dell (del), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:35 (eight years ago) link

cant believe the bacon sundae is real

Michael B Higgins (Michael B), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:48 (eight years ago) link

idk ppl have been putting bacon in desserts for a while now, not that crazy that a big fast food restaurant would jump on that

lamborghini persie (J0rdan S.), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:49 (eight years ago) link

yeah my best bro's fiancee sprinkles bacon in coffee.

a regina spektor is haunting europe (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:51 (eight years ago) link

full english breakfast smoothie

blossom smulch (schlump), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:55 (eight years ago) link

Thick, Hardwood

George Peppard Steak (snoball), Friday, 15 June 2012 17:59 (eight years ago) link

^ porn names

contenderizer, Friday, 15 June 2012 18:37 (eight years ago) link

and yeah, BK bacon sundae is not super surprising to me. makes sense: further mainstreaming of "yum bacon" meme, sweet + salty has been a food trend for a while. not a bad idea, though i don't trust burger king to do right by it.

contenderizer, Friday, 15 June 2012 18:43 (eight years ago) link

I've had bacon + ice cream or bacon + chocolate on a few occasions and it's never really been a very successful combination. It's basically just a sweet thing with a few chewy out-of-place bits of bacon floating around.

"Holy crap," I mutter, as he gently taps my area (silby), Friday, 15 June 2012 18:47 (eight years ago) link

I saw the P'zolo commercial on TV last night and startled my wife by yelling "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT BULLSHIT" at the television

Victory Chainsaw! (DJP), Friday, 15 June 2012 18:49 (eight years ago) link

What in the fuck is the purpose of the apostrophe in the P'zone/P'zolo, other than to irritate me? Is there something wrong with "Pizzolo" (the word)? It's not like they're saving any syllables, really,

Race Against Rockism (Myonga Vön Bontee), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:00 (eight years ago) link

A made up word can be trademarked.

George Peppard Steak (snoball), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:05 (eight years ago) link

p'zolo live once thats the motto ni**a zolo

johnny crunch, Friday, 15 June 2012 21:08 (eight years ago) link

is "pizzone" a word?

Victory Chainsaw! (DJP), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:09 (eight years ago) link

hahaha "The P'Zolo: Better than a Hot Pocket!"

Victory Chainsaw! (DJP), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:14 (eight years ago) link

poo zoos only live once

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:15 (eight years ago) link

I have never heard of a poo zoo coming back from the dead so there is that

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:15 (eight years ago) link

poo zoo was the first p z combo I thought of, I should've went with the second: pussy zipper

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:16 (eight years ago) link

"coprophiliac zoophile" - two words you never want to see together.

George Peppard Steak (snoball), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:16 (eight years ago) link

pinata zoroaster

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:16 (eight years ago) link

Pazuzuzolo

a dense custard of infinity (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:19 (eight years ago) link

I guess the name was chosen because "p'zolo!" is the sound someone makes when they bite into one and spit it out because it's too hot.

George Peppard Steak (snoball), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:23 (eight years ago) link

If there was a Klingon Pizza Hut, what would they call these?

George Peppard Steak (snoball), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:23 (eight years ago) link

pizza vuvuzelas think abt it

johnny crunch, Friday, 15 June 2012 21:26 (eight years ago) link

so who is gonna be the first one of us to actually eat a p'zolo?

me so fat (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:56 (eight years ago) link

i mean we all know it's gonna be me but i just figured i'd give someone else the opportunity to step up to the plate this time

me so fat (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Friday, 15 June 2012 21:57 (eight years ago) link

three weeks pass...

not from the food lab but


https://www.foodandwine.com/news/local-restaurant-on-delivery-app-actually-chuck-e-cheese-pasquallys


But the real answer from Chuck himself (so to speak) has more to do with the arcade-themed pizza chain branching out into the new world of delivery apps than any nefarious plot to dupe pure-hearted pizza customers. "CEC Entertainment, Inc. recently launched Pasqually’s Pizza & Wings nationwide. The inspiration was rooted in the desire to create a premium pizza while staying true to the CEC brand," a Chuck E. Cheese spokesperson told Food & Wine via email. "Pasqually’s Pizza & Wings, named after another favorite member of Munch's Make Believe Band, shares kitchen space with the Chuck E. Cheese restaurant, ensuring high-quality, fresh ingredients. Pasqually’s Pizza & Wings’ recipes use fresh, homemade pizza dough, just like Chuck E. Cheese, but it is a different pizza that features a thicker crust and extra sauce, giving consumers a more flavorful, more premium pizza experience. While Pasqually’s Pizza & Wings recipes are currently only available for delivery, select items might be added to the Chuck E. Cheese menu in the future."

maura, Monday, 18 May 2020 13:54 (six months ago) link

and another:

Scott Gladstone, vice president of Applebee's strategy and development, confirmed that Neighborhood Wings is, in fact, another way to be eatin' good in the neighborhood these days.

"At Applebee's restaurants, wings are a top selling menu item," Gladstone told TODAY in an email. "We launched Neighborhood Wings by Applebee's on GrubHub to make it even easier for guests to get their wings fix and to give us the opportunity to test out new items made for wing lovers that aren't on our main menu."


https://www.today.com/food/chuck-e-cheese-applebee-s-are-delivering-food-under-different-t181814

maura, Thursday, 21 May 2020 10:15 (six months ago) link

https://tacobellquarterly.org/

j., Tuesday, 26 May 2020 01:18 (five months ago) link

one month passes...

https://www.hawaiinewsnow.com/video/2020/06/29/what-trending-papa-john-launching-shaq-aroni-pizza/


As a Papa John's board member and franchise owner, Shaquille O'Neal came up with this super sized pizza with extra cheese and 66 slices of pepperoni on it.

maura, Tuesday, 30 June 2020 00:18 (four months ago) link

https://www.restaurantbusinessonline.com/operations/bankrupt-chuck-e-cheese-beefs-its-pasquallys-pizza-concept

“With the pandemic happening, we took the opportunity to compress the activation of the idea to launch Pasqually’s,” CEC Entertainment CMO Sherri Landry said. “People behave very differently. Third-party delivery sites have become the new Main Street.”

The virtual concept’s menu has been designed to offer more grown-up flavors than the kid-centric Chuck E. Cheese offerings, Landry said.

“Pasqually’s pizza has more sauce. There’s more robust flavor in the bite,” she said. “It has a combination of cheddar and mozzarella cheese to punch up the flavor … It’s a great opportunity to talk to young Gen Z or millennial consumers who understand delivery and deliver them a pizza option from a brand they grew up with, a brand they love.”

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:22 (four months ago) link

if they have any goddamn sense, they will put a big fuckin' Chuck E Cheese cartoon on the box surrounded by supporting characters; that's mostly what people feel nostalgia for.

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 9 July 2020 18:24 (four months ago) link

consumers who understand delivery

all cats are beautiful (silby), Thursday, 9 July 2020 20:11 (four months ago) link

and to think all these years they were withholding the robust, grown-up flavours of pizza sauce and cheese.

S-, Saturday, 11 July 2020 02:13 (four months ago) link

i ate the taco bell grilled cheese burrito and couldn't finish half of it - the entire thing was just drenched in cheap grease, it sounds halfway delicious on paper and i generally fuck with taco bell LTO but it was really unpleasant!

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Saturday, 11 July 2020 11:29 (four months ago) link

Are there any children named Alinea yet

all cats are beautiful (silby), Monday, 13 July 2020 04:42 (four months ago) link

two weeks pass...

https://www.pmq.com/marcospizzabowls/

Seyferth said Marco’s pizza bowls will “give pizza lovers another option to eating their favorite food. With more than one-fourth of the population tossing and wasting the crust of pizza and the popularization of pizza bowls, this product is an ideal fit. Marco’s officially gives you permission to eat pizza with a fork.”

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Saturday, 1 August 2020 15:59 (three months ago) link

love to absolutely shred the roof of my mouth on a nice piping hot bowl of toppings

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Saturday, 1 August 2020 16:08 (three months ago) link

With more than one-fourth of the population tossing and wasting the crust of pizza

dang, that's like 1.9 billion crusts per day; future generations will wonder why we needed so much grain

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Saturday, 1 August 2020 16:27 (three months ago) link

lol the leap from "people don't like to eat the tasteless dry bread at the end of their pizza slice" to "people just want to scrape off the sauce and toppings and eat it with a fork because they hate the concept of bread"

℺ ☽ ⋠ ⏎ (✖), Saturday, 1 August 2020 20:47 (three months ago) link

What’s the problem with not eating 100% of the crust? This feels like being chided for not cleaning the plate.

sound of scampo talk to me (El Tomboto), Saturday, 1 August 2020 21:11 (three months ago) link

Look, it's called a Zaproboli, and you're going to shove it in your fucking face

blue light or electric light (the table is the table), Saturday, 1 August 2020 21:33 (three months ago) link

(Zaproboli being short for Pizza Protein Bowl)

blue light or electric light (the table is the table), Saturday, 1 August 2020 21:33 (three months ago) link

If the crust on the pizza is “tasteless dry bread” that’s not good pizza

singular wolf erotica producer (Hadrian VIII), Saturday, 1 August 2020 21:42 (three months ago) link

yeah, most pizza isn't good pizza

℺ ☽ ⋠ ⏎ (✖), Saturday, 1 August 2020 21:49 (three months ago) link

so wait... by removing the "crust"...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qItugh-fFgg

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Saturday, 1 August 2020 23:02 (three months ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BG7273yDpdA

maura, Saturday, 1 August 2020 23:06 (three months ago) link

i fucking love polly o string cheese btw

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Saturday, 1 August 2020 23:08 (three months ago) link

This is pizza for Ketos.

nickn, Sunday, 2 August 2020 03:26 (three months ago) link

eat the ball pic.twitter.com/iXplBqhglc

— Big Bob Hell 🏴☭ (@AlmightyBoob) August 2, 2020

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Sunday, 2 August 2020 23:48 (three months ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsxTSr-5Mww&feature=youtu.be

cmon dickheads, eat the ball

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Sunday, 2 August 2020 23:49 (three months ago) link

Eat the Ball® is an innovative European company based in Austria that launched the world's first bread brand in 2012 and established a new category of functional branded bread.

It all began in 2007, with one simple question: Why are there no real bread brands? A food as important as bread is still only sold in generic “categories” instead of as a real, distinguishable product brand with individual quality characteristics. The company’s founder Michael Hobel and his business partner Norbert Kraihamer found the issue of bread so intriguing that in 2012 they decided to launch Eat the Ball® in Austria, following five years of research and development. The first steps into Europe and now in the USA. The stated aim is to create the world's first real bread brand.

excellent mission statement, that answers all of my questions

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Sunday, 2 August 2020 23:51 (three months ago) link

"gently made"?

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Sunday, 2 August 2020 23:59 (three months ago) link

five years of research and development

℺ ☽ ⋠ ⏎ (✖), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:00 (three months ago) link

I feel like there are bread brands!

the quar on drugs (Simon H.), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:00 (three months ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsxTSr-5Mww

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:00 (three months ago) link

DISRUPT BREAD

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:00 (three months ago) link

562 views for an ad that was posted two years ago

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:01 (three months ago) link

get me a two year old donut ad

the quar on drugs (Simon H.), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:03 (three months ago) link

launched the world's first bread brand in 2012

I am incredulous that these euros have never heard of Wonder Bread.

the unappreciated charisma of cows (Aimless), Monday, 3 August 2020 00:11 (three months ago) link

Even Dave's Killer Bread started in 2005.

nickn, Monday, 3 August 2020 05:41 (three months ago) link

and Mike's Hard Bread was a year before that

℺ ☽ ⋠ ⏎ (✖), Monday, 3 August 2020 05:55 (three months ago) link

what the fuck?

À la recherche du scamps perdu (Noodle Vague), Monday, 3 August 2020 09:13 (three months ago) link

Pepperidge Farm, not remembered :(

Doctor Casino, Monday, 3 August 2020 13:26 (three months ago) link

The World's First Bread Brand

blue light or electric light (the table is the table), Monday, 3 August 2020 14:52 (three months ago) link

Hey, wait just one minute.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b0/Bread_1971.JPG

peace, man, Monday, 3 August 2020 14:56 (three months ago) link

one month passes...

RIP mexican pizza

maura, Friday, 4 September 2020 01:34 (two months ago) link

four weeks pass...

Good US-baiting from Supreme Court of Ireland there: for VAT purposes at least, Subway bread is confectionary, not bread.

anatol_merklich, Friday, 2 October 2020 08:53 (one month ago) link

one month passes...

https://www.insider.com/ban-chipotles-cuffing-season-menu-2020-11

"Our restaurants have been extremely popular date destinations, and many of our fans have found love bonding over their Chipotle obsessions," Tressie Lieberman, Chipotle's vice president of digital marketing and off-premise, told Insider. "In our endless pursuit to meet our fans where they are, we teamed up with Uber Eats to create a series of fun, sharable pairings that can be enjoyed anywhere and will complement the dating experience."

https://i.imgur.com/U4xzEfe.jpg

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Friday, 13 November 2020 00:41 (one week ago) link

the chipotles i’ve been in have really bad atmosphere, don’t go on a date there

brimstead, Friday, 13 November 2020 02:58 (one week ago) link

RIP mexican pizza


can’t believe I’m posting this but you can recreate the Mexican pizza at a cheaper price by ordering a tostada with no chipotle sauce/lettuce and adding a side of beef. or maybe it’s two tostadas? I need to ask my partner.

brimstead, Friday, 13 November 2020 03:00 (one week ago) link

https://www.kfc.co.uk/menu/for-one/gravy-burger-1-mini-fillet-box-meal

A Christmas Special – An Original Recipe fillet burger, teamed with creamy Gravynnaise™, cheese & topped with a cupped hash brown made to be filled with lashings of your Gravy side, all in a glazed bun. Served with a Mini Fillet, Fries, a Gravynnaise™ dip & drink.

it'd be pretty cool if they served that "Gravynnaise™ dip & drink" with an oxford comma too

the portentous pepper (govern yourself accordingly), Thursday, 19 November 2020 22:29 (four days ago) link

https://www.redlobster.com/news-press/press/2020/09/15/red-lobster-and-pepsico-kick-off-new-relationship-with-thedew-garita---the-first-official-mtn-dew-cocktail

The DEW Garita pairs perfectly with Red Lobster’s iconic Cheddar Bay Biscuits®. Made using a top-secret recipe, the refreshingly fun cocktail will begin rolling out to select Red Lobster restaurants in September and will be available nationwide by the end of 2020. The Red Lobster and PepsiCo innovation teams are also working together to leverage iconic PepsiCo brands across the Frito-Lay and Quaker range of products to co-create tasty menu items.

johnny crunch, Thursday, 19 November 2020 22:50 (four days ago) link

Whatever could be the ingredients in this Mountain Dew margarita?

Four Seasons Total Manscaping (forksclovetofu), Friday, 20 November 2020 15:18 (three days ago) link

love the name Gravynnaise™

Politically homely (jim in vancouver), Friday, 20 November 2020 22:42 (three days ago) link


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