local businesses with horribly formed "names"

this maybe belongs on "your terrible ideas" but i have the notion for a charming, quirky, vaguely dated coffee shop named "Knowing Beans, Knowing Brew"

In a story about Alamo Drafthouse:

"Variety reports that Alamo’s Chapter 11 filing is part of a purchase agreement with previous investors Altamont Capital Partners..."

Altamontamo

https://www.thefrenchlettuce.com

Is there any way this is not a pun on 'French Letter'?

Why would you want to associated any shop (with the possible exception of an adult store) with condoms?

They don't even have any products that feature lettuce, they are fucking bakeries.

Pottonmouth is a cannabis store in the small town of Valley Junction, OR. My theory is the owners were stoned when they invented the name.

I saw a hair removal shop called reWAXation the other day

More of a horribly formed sign, but worth a gander

I’m sorry....what kind of store?? pic.twitter.com/oDoj87g3Of

— mariana Z (@mariana057) April 10, 2021

Local businesses' menu items with horribly formed "names"

I give you the "Warm Nutted Goat Cheese Salad"

https://i.ibb.co/xJk3Y0M/IMG-20210427-182127.jpg
imageupload

xp to 420 thread, everything about this Dallas "toasted" sub establishment and promotional video is horribly formed

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQ-91BPhciA

Theres a handful of Cheba Huts in AZ. Guess they are expanding!

the subs are pretty good

I know about it because I passed one in Austin the other day

tbh, I laughed when I saw it, but then looking at their website brought the full on cringe

the one by ASU was the original i think. always packed with college students.

tighten up, hippies!

Don't worry, already called the police

https://i.ibb.co/9r6Ps15/IMG-20210522-120931.jpg

Not businesses, but food products i've seen in stores lately:

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51rN8OBMwNL._SX300_SY300_QL70_FMwebp_.jpg

https://www.aisleofshame.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/whiskey-cheddar-cheese-e1575911227843.jpg
https://sureketo.com/images/caulipower-italian-sausage-vegetable-cauliflower-pizza.jpg

Near where I live:

https://www.fyple.biz/imagecustom/190418/The%20Bust%20Stop.jpg9f14ff49-2a8a-464f-84b6-386b831edc7a-big.jpg

Not a local business and not (I don't think) a deliberate pun, but

https://soyface.illinois.edu/

What is SoyFACE?
SoyFACE (Soybean Free Air Concentration Enrichment) is an innovative facility for growing crops under production field conditions in an atmosphere that has higher levels of carbon dioxide and ozone, higher temperature and altered soil water availability. SoyFACE was designed to discover the effects of atmospheric change on the agronomy and productivity of Midwestern crops as well as to find solutions that will lead to crops better adapted to this future.

https://i.ibb.co/wRGnK9z/20220702-194013.jpg

I've learned that "'Abba' signifies the close, intimate relationship of a father and his child, as well as the childlike trust that a young child puts in his 'daddy',” but this pamphlet struck me as funny when I first saw it (and didn't know).

https://store.davarkg.com/en/wp-content/uploads/CS-Abba-is-my-God-01-E.jpg

(It's a Christian thing at a local church.)

It's just the Hebrew word for father...still weird.

Yeah, but the font references the band, right? So maybe there is some kind of "wink, wink" going on. It is apparently a Japanese-American Christian church.

Dees Mutts Dog Grooming

Raze that place to the ground

http://www.deezbuttsbbq.com/
trigger warning if you click through

not local and not their name, but...

https://www.instagram.com/volkswagenitalia/

wow. took me a second

https://i.imgur.com/ebWzPxb.jpg

https://stinkypantsfishing.com/

https://fastly.4sqi.net/img/general/width960/7440763_Q0_BFqge5948eANrVJwioPvy2pQLcW1wew1Q1xW1uKI.jpg

The 14 Most Punny Pho Restaurant Names in Pho-king History

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2023/feb/04/refuse-firm-lord-of-the-bins-ordered-to-change-its-name-by-tolkien-franchise

Horribly formed to the point of legal altercation.

I noticed this place when I was in Hastings last year:

https://sites.create-cdn.net/siteimages/72/8/1/728172/19/8/9/19894031/540x690.jpeg?1648211459

They should really move a few doors up the street (however many 30 numbers is).

I passed by one of my favorites the other day: the salon-barbershop SHEAR PANDEMONIUM

It took me fully 5 minutes of rumination after driving past this store to figure out what they were going for: a store called SCRAPENDIPITY

All I could see was “scrape” and I was totally stumped for a bit.

I was waiting at a bus stop in the summer, opposite a shop called KATASTROPHIES. They sold what looked like shit trophies for Sunday league football teams. Admirable project, dreadful name.

Yeah, they should have called it Cat Ass Trophies and had every trophy be in the shape of a cat's bumhole.

wait, kata is short for katarina and a fairly common name both in sweden and across the slavic countries. kata's trophies would be an excellently formed name!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPU0TAwxKM8

(i will never miss the chance to post kate nv videos)

Lmao emil.y

Lol emil.y. And by the look of the shop, Kata's Trophies was *way* beyond them as a construction.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FprdoLZWcAIkUbc?format=jpg&name=medium

There's a brewery called Dynasty Brewing.

Their social media handle, however, is @brewdynasty.

I cannot stop reading it as "brew de nasty."

Your branding > theirs

I’m in Florida right now and just saw a portable toilet from a company named Knight Jon Boy

Wok This Way

San Antonio Tx