Marilyn Haggerty's amazing Olive Garden review and the subsequent viral shitstorm

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re amateurist: my gf's parents love olive garden, and i've eaten there three times in the last few years (after never having been). i do not object and have not spoken an ill word of the place to them. my mom loves it, too, and applebees, though i do give her a hard time abt it.

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:03 (twelve years ago) link

"good" in that it's salty as hell, drowning in oil cheese and butter

My parents gave me a Red Lobster gift card a couple years ago, and my wife got without a doubt the saltiest piece of fish I have ever tasted. She couldn't eat it, but we were too depressed to send it back. She was ill when we got home. Never again.

On the sidelines in a trash can grumping (Dan Peterson), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:04 (twelve years ago) link

in france, olive garden is where farmers send their animals to eat

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:05 (twelve years ago) link

i went to a red lobster as a 'joke' a while ago, and yeah, pretty solidly shitty food.

tho like a moron i tried to 'order well' and got some salmon and vegetables that was like nursing home food. i bet if i just got popcorn shrimp and a lobster tail i would have been fine

― goole, Thursday, March 15, 2012 1:01 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

damn dude you really fucked up your joke visit to red lobster

― max, Thursday, March 15, 2012 1:03 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lolllllll

A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:05 (twelve years ago) link

i really did fuck that up ;_;

goole, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:05 (twelve years ago) link

what a horribly formed "joke visit"

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:06 (twelve years ago) link

why would you go there and do that

A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:07 (twelve years ago) link

there is nothing wrong w/ ironic eating cmon

iatee, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:08 (twelve years ago) link

i don't even know, god

goole, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:08 (twelve years ago) link

you waste. you little man.

max, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:08 (twelve years ago) link

a runaway joke visit to olive garden a couple years ago just ended up making me, my gf, and our friends all feel kinda sad. not a funny joke don't do it!!

lou reed scott walker monks niagra (chinavision!), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:10 (twelve years ago) link

did you 'order well'?

goole, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:11 (twelve years ago) link

we all ordered fairly funny

lou reed scott walker monks niagra (chinavision!), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:11 (twelve years ago) link

in red lobster, joke is on you

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:12 (twelve years ago) link

in that case ordering the hospital salmon really was probably the least bad outcome he could have had, sort of like stalemating red lobster

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago) link

go big or go home imho

A Little Princess btw (s1ocki), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:16 (twelve years ago) link

I just looked at OG's online menu - not good. If I had to go I'd probably get the minestrone and the caesar chicken salad with the dressing on the side and a bottle of the Valpolicello to share. Interestng that they have a Brunello on the wine list, albeit at $70.00.

L'ennui, cette maladie de tous les (Michael White), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:19 (twelve years ago) link

apparently hagerty's husband died in the red river flood

max, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:21 (twelve years ago) link

i would love to go to lunch with missus hagerty. i have a feeling i would like her town!

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:24 (twelve years ago) link

this kills me. this thread is as good as any for it.

http://consumerist.com/assets_c/2010/03/DoubleGulp-example1-thumb-400x316-38336.jpg

It appears that the local 7-11 I've been going to for some time has employed the good old Grocery Shrink Ray on their "Double Gulp" brand of Fountain Sodas. I have been getting them there since they where originally put out in the heavy Wax paper folding cups and they have 64 ounces of liquid for a long time.

The new cups, pictured in the examples I've sent, are very pretty looking with the see-through plastic but are CLEARLY much smaller then the original cups. I do not have an exact fluid ounce on the new cups because they are not labeled like the old cups have been. The price however still remains the same for less liquid refreshment as I've also
attached from my Cellphone.

I hope the information is useful, I love it when places do this and think no one will notice. Great way to save money, same price, less drink!

Keep up the excellent work and fighting the good fight!

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:27 (twelve years ago) link

eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:30 (twelve years ago) link

apparently hagerty's husband died in the red river flood

― max, Thursday, March 15, 2012 1:21 PM (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

aw

call all destroyer, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:39 (twelve years ago) link

The closest OG has at least a two-hour wait on Saturday nights.

Exile in lolville (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:43 (twelve years ago) link

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1997_Red_River_Flood

Duration: April 1997
Fatalities: 0
Damages: $3.5 billion[1]

Eric H., Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:54 (twelve years ago) link

carl agatha otm upthread. i'm one of them big ol' american girls but i mostly watch what i eat and make sensible choices. i've never been to an olive garden or cheesecake factory or pf changs or or or; the last time i went to a hometown buffet (cuz there was nothing else around) i got sick. i have never bought a "super big gulp" in my life.

however, whenever i go into a restaurant, i feel really self-conscious when i'm ordering and then when i'm eating -- if i have a moment of weakness and order a burger and fries, i'm suddenly THAT PERSON, y'know, the stereotype of the fattyfatfat who can't stop shoving grease and salt into my dorito-colored mouth and just sits around literally eating tubs of lard and costing my country money.

the reality is i go to the farmer's market every-ish week and subscribe to an organic produce delivery service. i cook at home several nights a week. i don't exercise enough, but most people don't.

the kids of boris midney high (get bent), Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:57 (twelve years ago) link

ugh did this thread become a make fun of fat people and the gigantic portions they spend all day eating at the olive garden thread? i am just not going to read it and otm jody and jenny.

horseshoe, Thursday, 15 March 2012 17:59 (twelve years ago) link

it didn't become that

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:00 (twelve years ago) link

people need to read my original post about this. i am NOT talking about beautiful and vibrant and decidedly HEALTHY looking american girls like get bent! and i do feel horrible that people feel self-conscious about what they eat in public. nobody should ever be made to feel any which way about what they eat/drink/smoke/etc.

and i have never in my life made a comment about what someone is eating or what they should or should not eat. people i don't know tell me i should quit smoking all the time and i've gotten used to it, but its something i would never say to another person.

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:13 (twelve years ago) link

and big gulp thing is more a post about lol first world priorities and what constitutes "fighting the good fight" for some people.

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:13 (twelve years ago) link

we already have a food fascist thread iirc

iatee, Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:14 (twelve years ago) link

even if the fat people you're talking about aren't beautiful, you don't know what they eat or what their personal habits are by looking at them. i sense that that's a small part of the overall point you were making but it's a pet peeve.

horseshoe, Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:17 (twelve years ago) link

and i do feel horrible that people feel self-conscious about what they eat in public.

a side note: i remember being in front of this overweight guy on line for a movie, and he was saying to his friend how the waiter at the restaurant they went to gave him an odd look for ordering a salad, like because he was fat he was SUPPOSED TO order some triple-decker bacon bomb with a double order of onion rings. and when the food came out, the busser initially put the salad down at someone else's seat, cuz there's no fucking way the fat guy ordered a salad, rite? so, damned if you do, damned if you don't. (even if it's all in the dude's head and he's being paranoid, i think you can see where the paranoia comes from.)

the kids of boris midney high (get bent), Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:19 (twelve years ago) link

hey guys who wants to go to cheesecake factory

↖MODERNIST↗ hangups (thomp), Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:20 (twelve years ago) link

xp: no, but i'd be down for margs at el torito! whooooooo

the kids of boris midney high (get bent), Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:22 (twelve years ago) link

but its something i would never say to another person.

"Thank you for your impertinennt solicitude which I fear, alas, serves more as upkeep to your smug self-esteem than any real comcern for me, a complete stranger."

L'ennui, cette maladie de tous les (Michael White), Thursday, 15 March 2012 18:22 (twelve years ago) link

really all i should have said was: i think people are being slowly poisoned to death in this country and i think its a crime and i feel bad about it. that's all i should have said. i didn't mean to offend anyone.

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:03 (twelve years ago) link

I just came back from Applebee's, it was a lunch meeting. I couldn't order alcohol. :(

Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:16 (twelve years ago) link

I have generally found Chili's to not be that bad, although it's been a while.

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:19 (twelve years ago) link

i there a national chain of semi-"fancy" sit-down dining places that tries to go the chipotle route: emphasizing green consciousness, freshness and health while still providing huge portions of salty/greasy good-badness? that strategy seems to have been very effective at the fast food lunch level. kind of surprised there isn't a dinner equivalent, outside the salad-bar buffet places that have been around since the 80s.

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:24 (twelve years ago) link

I went to an Applebee's with my mom once. They had a lot of interesting memorabilia on the walls. #haggertystyle

scott seward, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:28 (twelve years ago) link

We had a Ponderosa Steakhouse in town (now, it's a Pizza Garden) that a buddy of mine worked at. He told me that nearly all their food - like, the mashed potatoes, the gravy, the mac&cheese sauce, the ice cream, everything was all just this powder they mixed with water and heated up. Which of course led to the conversation, "why not mix them all and drink it?" Well we did and then we both threw up. Really makes you think doesn't it?

frogbs, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:30 (twelve years ago) link

i do believe that anything mixed with water and heated could possible pass for ice cream

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:33 (twelve years ago) link

frogbs on a roll

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:33 (twelve years ago) link

oh yeah. not the ice cream. i mean the ice cream was a powder. but they didn't heat it

frogbs, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:34 (twelve years ago) link

frogbs on a lobster cheese roll

Exile in lolville (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:34 (twelve years ago) link

was the ice cream in the concoction you drank though, cuz if not I'd rather just imagine it was so don't tell me

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:38 (twelve years ago) link

it was. he took a bit from every single powder they had, including the ice cream and the other dessert stuff. I think he said there was like 12 different "foods" in there. The result was orangeish-brown, so we dyed it blue so it would look like Gatorade.

frogbs, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:41 (twelve years ago) link

ah of course

goole, Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:42 (twelve years ago) link

aka the "tour of italy"

the prurient pinterest (Hurting 2), Thursday, 15 March 2012 19:42 (twelve years ago) link


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