Bearsharktopus v. Bearotaur

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imho - the Bearsharktopus doesn't stand a chance. top heavy and only tentacles to support it's front, it's no match for the speed and weaponry of Bearotaur.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Monday, 14 June 2010 19:34 (ten years ago) link

Speed is of the essence. Bearotaur.

Madchen, Monday, 14 June 2010 19:59 (ten years ago) link

bearotuar in a walk

call all destroyer, Monday, 14 June 2010 20:04 (ten years ago) link

where is the "yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssss" option?

rugged and unrelenting (even brutal) (HI DERE), Monday, 14 June 2010 20:09 (ten years ago) link

beatotaur is a fucking bitch. put your spiky bat down and we'll see what happens.

goole, Monday, 14 June 2010 20:10 (ten years ago) link

Bearsharktopus is just awesomer, regardless of whether it would flop about and fall over a lot, or not.

flanimal collective (Upt0eleven), Monday, 14 June 2010 20:11 (ten years ago) link

Guys, what if the fight takes place in water??

Tuomas, Monday, 14 June 2010 22:00 (ten years ago) link

both pics are on a beach. clearly our competitOrs have already chosen a battleground. ankle deep water.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:06 (ten years ago) link

wondering if the bearsharktopus has also inherited the deadly intelligence of the octopus as well.

an indie-rock microgenre (dyao), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:13 (ten years ago) link

Which has left the most offspring??>?

breaking that little dog's heart chakra (Abbott), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:14 (ten years ago) link

wondering if the bearsharktopus has also inherited the deadly intelligence of the octopus as well.

i don't think so. otherwise it would have brought a weapon to the fight.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 03:49 (ten years ago) link

I am also wondering how a Bear Centipede would fare in this fight

an indie-rock microgenre (dyao), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 03:51 (ten years ago) link

Pics?

Tuomas, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 06:24 (ten years ago) link

do not discount bearsharktopus my bredrin

legalize gay pot (jdchurchill), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 16:57 (ten years ago) link

yeah, i'm not so sure - bearotaur seems to have just regular old bear paws, which means no thumbs, which means that the admittedly kickass mace he's got is likely just duct-taped there. see, how both paws are on top? who holds a weapon like that? useless, dude.
on the other hand, bearshartopus looks like he eats some nasty stuff and likely has some literally stunning wicked reek going on. i guess bearotaur can still run away pretty fast though.

Kim, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 17:06 (ten years ago) link

the more i think about Bearsharktopus the more i think it would drown if it ever tried to swim. a shark isn't going anywhere without it's tail, which this guy does not posses. a squid gets around using water propulsion which is also absent here. even a bear needs it's from paws to swim!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:32 (ten years ago) link

Q: Where is bearsharktopus from?
A: It's from paws!

Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:33 (ten years ago) link

I think it's quite attractive

paws

stofu (cozen), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:35 (ten years ago) link

not sure how bearotaur is gonna fare once he gets close enough to do any damage, but i'm gonna say speed would win the day for him.

Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:37 (ten years ago) link

speed as in "omg look how fast bearsharktopus tore bearotaur's legs off with those monstrous tentacles"?

Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:38 (ten years ago) link

those tentacles aren't monstrous, they're stubby- that's why i'm not giving them as much due as i otherwise would.

Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:40 (ten years ago) link

paws

stofu (cozen), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:41 (ten years ago) link

right now the only thing bearotaur has going for him is his sweet castle; pretty sure there's a ballista up there backing him up for when the velcro on that club comes loose

Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:42 (ten years ago) link

it's where he's holding bearsharktopus's daughter hostage.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:43 (ten years ago) link

if bearsharktopus even tried to bring its jaws into play it would fall over

Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:43 (ten years ago) link

obv the skarktopus part of it couldn't care less, but the bear component is fucking pissed!

xpost - exactly!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:44 (ten years ago) link

you guys the bearsharktopus can only look up

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:47 (ten years ago) link

aaaaa

now i'm imagining it coming at me from below

Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:47 (ten years ago) link

this is also imp. data re: the bearotaur

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poEwkIPKn3w

puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:48 (ten years ago) link

holy fucking shit!!!!!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 16:00 (ten years ago) link

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

System, Monday, 28 June 2010 23:04 (ten years ago) link

voted bearotaur under pressure

Jarlrmai, Monday, 28 June 2010 23:17 (ten years ago) link

That video suggests the bearotaur will mostly be using that club to hit itself in the head, so I'm voting bearsharktopus.

Scelsi Hotel (Paul in Santa Cruz), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 02:39 (ten years ago) link

furry fin is adorable, bearsharktopus wins for cuddle-bility.

peacocks, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:21 (ten years ago) link

u got a low threshold of cuddleability, imo

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:23 (ten years ago) link

so are these SyFy original movies or what

~athdouspart (some dude), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:24 (ten years ago) link

I'm a sucker for suction cups, tbqh

peacocks, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:27 (ten years ago) link

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

System, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:01 (ten years ago) link

a travesty - bearsharktopus should have won!

sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:03 (ten years ago) link

nonsense. it can barely stand.
the people have spoken.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:06 (ten years ago) link

bearsharktopus can both stand and swim! It can probably breathe underwater, unlike bearotaur.

sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:08 (ten years ago) link

if by "swim" you mean "thrash about frantically until it sinks to the ocean floor" i would be in agreement.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:10 (ten years ago) link

although i will concede it could breath just fine down there.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:10 (ten years ago) link

in the episode of X-Files, the thing that could breathe underwater won vs. that which could not

sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:12 (ten years ago) link

Mulder was which one?

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:14 (ten years ago) link

at any rate - the battle is not happening in the deep blue depths, but the shoreline in which both are photographed.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:15 (ten years ago) link

no, it was alien-human underwater hybrid breathing creature vs. helpful sewer system supervisor and before him, hapless sewer maintenance technician

sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:17 (ten years ago) link

basically bearsharktopus could employ a similar strategy and hide underwater until bearotaur enters the water, then knock bearotaur off-balance by grabbing bearotaur with the tentacles, then delivering fatal bites

sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:18 (ten years ago) link

how do you hide underwater? it's clear!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:27 (ten years ago) link

the song Maneater was actually about Bearsharktopus

sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:13 (ten years ago) link

theme:

hairshart tonight, wrapped around the corpus of death tonight
hairshart burning becuz this is the nexus of love tonight (tonite tonite tonite.....)
alright!!! tonight!!!
tentacles of love and hair within the light tonight
octopus sanction of vengeance coming down alight
fire within the gill-flesh armor of shark tonight
alright......alright......ALRIGHT!

pot of hunny, btw

good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:27 (ten years ago) link

bearotaur so lame the durans don't even notice him, except for nick rhodes who's all 'whateverrrrrrr'

postcards from the (ledge), Thursday, 8 July 2010 12:51 (ten years ago) link

They laugh at his cheaply pierced ear.

peacocks, Thursday, 8 July 2010 12:57 (ten years ago) link

man, was SO drunk

good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:14 (ten years ago) link

is hard to "draw" undr normal circumstances with little touch pad guy, but...

good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:15 (ten years ago) link

I assume being incredibly drunk and hairsharts always go together

emo WINNER! (HI DERE), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:15 (ten years ago) link

lolololol

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:25 (ten years ago) link

i am seeing a trend on this thread.

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:32 (ten years ago) link

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/818963/jeopardy.bmp

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:36 (ten years ago) link

who would win in jeopardy?

peacocks, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:37 (ten years ago) link

as above imo

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:40 (ten years ago) link

depends on if you define winner as "the one who answers the most questions" or as "the one who eats everyone on stage and runs off with the money"

emo WINNER! (HI DERE), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:43 (ten years ago) link

if we're talking running then it's def not the hiarsharktopus!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:45 (ten years ago) link

need a (drawing) tablet bad

good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:46 (ten years ago) link

but darragh u just made my day :D

good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:48 (ten years ago) link

i love this thread ... and i'm sober now.

sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:27 (ten years ago) link

its easy to fix that problem u know

NO NO NO NO NO ok (jjjusten), Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:51 (ten years ago) link

the fact i'm sober or the earlier problem of bearotaur being bearotaurdo montalban?

sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:57 (ten years ago) link

sobriety is a totally curable diease thanks to medical and retail science

NO NO NO NO NO ok (jjjusten), Thursday, 8 July 2010 21:00 (ten years ago) link

bearotaur's retardedness is incurable tho

sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 21:16 (ten years ago) link

need to photoshop andrei arshavin into a pic with both, and whichever eats the most of him by weight wins imo.

Everytime I hit 'submit post' the internet gets dumber (darraghmac), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 12:15 (ten years ago) link

man another reason to distrust kanye

bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:36 (ten years ago) link

which is more retarded: kanye west or bearotaur

sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:38 (ten years ago) link

oh thats easy that would be bearotaur

bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:39 (ten years ago) link

i have reached that point where bearotaur however fills me with sadness and pity, whereas kanye is like a buzzing fly. poor poor shameful bearotaur

bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:40 (ten years ago) link

i dunno john, i think kanye west might just be stupider than bearotaur

sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:42 (ten years ago) link

waiting for Kanye to tweet WEL AT LEAST I'M NOT AS RETATRDED AS BEAROTAUR LOL

Fee Fie Fo, FUNFNFUINFLFF! (HI DERE), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:42 (ten years ago) link

Kanyetaur.

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:51 (ten years ago) link

for reference:
http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/9860/centaur.gif

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:03 (ten years ago) link

Nothing's as retarded as whatever bearotaur kicks in the head.

Madchen, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:14 (ten years ago) link

if you want a vision of the future, imagine bearotaur kicking himself in the head...FOREVER

bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:17 (ten years ago) link

bearotaur and kanye kicking each other in the head forever would be a funny vision of the future

sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:18 (ten years ago) link

if you want a vision of the future, imagine bearotaur kicking himself in the head...FOREVER

pretty sure bearotaur would need completely different legs to achieve that

maybe when they unvelcro the mace they can slap a couple on his paws

Hot Tub Fellatio Machine (HI DERE), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:18 (ten years ago) link

http://i29.tinypic.com/307n8ef.jpg

Bondage Goat Zombie vs. Bearotaur

sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 21:52 (ten years ago) link

the picture is kinda blurry - what Bondage Goat Zombie holds in its hoof is Bearotaur's Little Brain

sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 21:55 (ten years ago) link

did a goat zombie take that picture?

while drunk?!

and with auto focus off?

not_goodwin, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:27 (ten years ago) link

you saw the picture before you uploaded it and you thought it'd be fine, i'm happy with this out of focus picture to go up on the net for many people to see and went ahead and posted it?

not_goodwin, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:29 (ten years ago) link

lol that image is to the Bearotaur detractors what the Hitler billboard is to the tea partiers!

two years pass...

bearsharktopus sux

Randy Carol (darraghmac), Wednesday, 19 September 2012 15:08 (eight years ago) link

Clearly bearsharktopus is the ultimate winner here, since bearotaur has run away.

Tuomas, Thursday, 20 September 2012 06:46 (eight years ago) link

fair point, but our cavedrawing tributes remain in tribute as secondary evidence

Randy Carol (darraghmac), Thursday, 20 September 2012 08:49 (eight years ago) link

two years pass...

It's a movie now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGTJ4Cv5ktE

Tuomas, Thursday, 16 July 2015 18:09 (five years ago) link

five years pass...

Bump for contritionbearotaur sketchings, go

Ole Blueyes Solskjaer (darraghmac), Tuesday, 12 January 2021 23:21 (one week ago) link

bearotaur and kanye kicking each other in the head forever would be a funny vision of the future

― sarahel, Wednesday, July 14, 2010 12:18 PM (ten years ago)

i kinda feel like we are living in that future rn

sarahell, Wednesday, 13 January 2021 00:28 (one week ago) link

BEARSHARK

A cursory web search finds no bands named something identical or similar to Bearotaur. Advantage: Bearsharktopus.

Infanta Terrible (j.lu), Wednesday, 13 January 2021 17:07 (one week ago) link


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