in fairness sprite's dreary injunction to "obey your thirst" clearly does not cut it in this time of upheaval
― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:33 (five years ago) link
shout out to the og edgelord brandhttps://thumbs.worthpoint.com/zoom/images1/1/0307/05/death-cigarettes-unopened-very-rare-originally-from_1_6c0f6cadacabac61137d8cde0d17a48a.jpg
― mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:34 (five years ago) link
Elan Sleazebaggano was a male Balosar slythmonger who was present on Coruscant, the capital of the Galactic Republic, during the Separatist Crisis.
― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:36 (five years ago) link
how the hell is LIQUID DEATH not a Nathan Fielder thing
― frogbs, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:38 (five years ago) link
we've definitely crossed the line from "commercials are indistinguishable from Tim & Eric homages" to "products seem to be designed by Nathan Fielder"
― mh, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:40 (five years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D5-03R8XsAAS-BS.jpg:small
always looking for brands that speak to me
― mookieproof, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:40 (five years ago) link
I'm part of the Totino's lifestyle. I'll admit it.
― frogbs, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:41 (five years ago) link
I was killing time at the bar over beers last week and started writing down a list of products think are embarrassing to buy versus products that are actually mortifying
kind of split the difference on Charmin with the bears on the packaging
― mh, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:42 (five years ago) link
ass cream? you're a man who admits his problems and is taking care of them
water with a metal design scheme? mortifying
― mh, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:43 (five years ago) link
the text on shampoo bottles is routinely amazing to me
especially love those that offer a french translation
― mookieproof, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:49 (five years ago) link
you're giving away my french language learning program idea
― mh, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:52 (five years ago) link
rincez, ecoutez, et repetez
― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:53 (five years ago) link
vrais poo for mes sham friends
― Simon H., Tuesday, 7 May 2019 17:53 (five years ago) link
― mookieproof, Tuesday, May 7, 2019 12:49 PM Bookmark Flag Post
Man, tell me about it. I can't even buy a chainsaw in North America without seeing that prissy language all over everything.
https://i.imgur.com/kVs6llT.png
― pplains, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:20 (five years ago) link
Hey, Poulan! France is in Europe, ok?
― pplains, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:21 (five years ago) link
i've never understood why the french are so bad at chainsaw safety, but glad that the safety messaging is targeting them now
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:28 (five years ago) link
miss u, Poulan Weed Eater Bowl
― mookieproof, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:28 (five years ago) link
I thought the famous chainsaw massacre happened in Texas?
― pomenitul, Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:29 (five years ago) link
more like Paris, Texas
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 7 May 2019 18:38 (five years ago) link
The Liquid Death thing has a very retro 90s anti-marketing marketing kind of vibe to it. I could see it being successful for a short time and then falling off the map.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 7 May 2019 19:12 (five years ago) link
so bad ass....
We couldn't find a makeup brand formulated specifically for men's skin; so we created one: https://t.co/X0xaeIOBsV pic.twitter.com/XDRySRWTkq— War Paint (@warpaintmufm) May 8, 2019
― global tetrahedron, Wednesday, 8 May 2019 22:40 (five years ago) link
marketing opportunity missed by not calling it ForSkin
― mick signals, Wednesday, 8 May 2019 22:44 (five years ago) link
they'll probably change the name to that after they find out that the band "warpaint" contains GIRLS, thus ruining their brand name forever
― Burt Bacharach's Bees (rushomancy), Wednesday, 8 May 2019 22:47 (five years ago) link
irl lol
― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Wednesday, 8 May 2019 23:21 (five years ago) link
This was literally the exact premise of an episode of Corporate.
― Simon H., Wednesday, 8 May 2019 23:25 (five years ago) link
Men, should you be wearing makeup? Probably – you look terrible. pic.twitter.com/BPWDqahjqU— Corporate (@corporate) January 30, 2019
― Simon H., Wednesday, 8 May 2019 23:26 (five years ago) link
So You Want to Market a Product for Men
Remember, any product can be marketed to men, even something that has been the exclusive province of women for time immemorial, like water. All you need to do is make sure your marketing materials are really tough and masculine.Connect with men by showing them things they love. Things like: fire, tattoos, blood (non-menstrual), skulls, bulls, spikes, leather bracelets, dirt, rocks, SEXXX, mountains, cold hard CA$$$H, motorcycles, barbells, gray T-shirts, red meat, Joe Rogan, golden retrievers, skateboarding, camo, guitars, dinosaurs, sports, knives, arm-wrestling, regular wrestling, the constant all-consuming fear that if you don’t assert your masculinity aggressively enough people will dismiss you, sweat, shredded abs, tigers, saying swears, cigars, quoting Scarface, more SEX, weapons, Tucker Max, baseball caps, jackhammering, mud, trucks, iron, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, abandoned construction sites, brown liquors, those big tires you push over, etc.So, for example, say you’re trying to sell an exciting new fruit-forward Pinot Noir from Oregon. Call it Dirt Blood, and have your ads be videos of a man driving a truck on a dirt road and chugging Pinot, before pulling over to make out with a woman with big boobs (hot). Then maybe he looks into the camera and says something like, “Dirt … It’s in my blood.” And you’re like, What? But you’re also pumped. You’re pumped to buy a wine called Dirt Blood.
Connect with men by showing them things they love. Things like: fire, tattoos, blood (non-menstrual), skulls, bulls, spikes, leather bracelets, dirt, rocks, SEXXX, mountains, cold hard CA$$$H, motorcycles, barbells, gray T-shirts, red meat, Joe Rogan, golden retrievers, skateboarding, camo, guitars, dinosaurs, sports, knives, arm-wrestling, regular wrestling, the constant all-consuming fear that if you don’t assert your masculinity aggressively enough people will dismiss you, sweat, shredded abs, tigers, saying swears, cigars, quoting Scarface, more SEX, weapons, Tucker Max, baseball caps, jackhammering, mud, trucks, iron, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, abandoned construction sites, brown liquors, those big tires you push over, etc.
So, for example, say you’re trying to sell an exciting new fruit-forward Pinot Noir from Oregon. Call it Dirt Blood, and have your ads be videos of a man driving a truck on a dirt road and chugging Pinot, before pulling over to make out with a woman with big boobs (hot). Then maybe he looks into the camera and says something like, “Dirt … It’s in my blood.” And you’re like, What? But you’re also pumped. You’re pumped to buy a wine called Dirt Blood.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 12:20 (five years ago) link
not a great attempt
― FernandoHierro, Friday, 10 May 2019 12:22 (five years ago) link
Love that it only took a handful of replies before the War Paint twitter dude 'actually'-ed a woman.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 12:30 (five years ago) link
i legit thought the war paint thing was a parody
― marcos, Friday, 10 May 2019 13:03 (five years ago) link
We may have previously been safe in assuming such things but we're kind of in a whole new world now.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 13:25 (five years ago) link
Liquid Death seems like a pretty tongue-in-cheek angle, the true insecure macho version would be, like, "Tactical H20" in camo flasks (maybe this already exists, but I'd rather not know).
― days of being riled (zchyrs), Friday, 10 May 2019 13:56 (five years ago) link
(This is not to say that Liquid Death isn't also stupid and embarrassing).
eagerly awaiting the emergence of an anal hygiene product for manly men
they can call it "DoucheBro"
― Burt Bacharach's Bees (rushomancy), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:10 (five years ago) link
Emena.
― pomenitul, Friday, 10 May 2019 14:16 (five years ago) link
Old Spice
― Yerac, Friday, 10 May 2019 14:32 (five years ago) link
epsom salts?
― :∵·∴·∵: (crüt), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:34 (five years ago) link
like ..... water?
an overarching problem here is the stupidity of all marketing i mean i know we all get that but
― deemsthelarker (darraghmac), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:50 (five years ago) link
I wouldn't know who to be without the guidepost of products marketed to my particular demographic. I get the impression that I should be punching more things and perhaps bellowing incoherently.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:10 (five years ago) link
I get the impression that I should be punching more things and perhaps bellowing incoherently.
As should we all.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:20 (five years ago) link
I had to go to Target today to buy things like paper towels and household cleaning products, but I reinforced my masculinity by picking up a Blu-Ray set of the first two John Wick movies while I was there.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:21 (five years ago) link
thinking about picking up some Mandles so my house can smell like napalm
― frogbs, Friday, 10 May 2019 15:23 (five years ago) link
step 1) constantly rub your knuckles at work and complain about how they hurt, until someone asksstep 2) "..."step 3) "...punched a wall"step 4) "...I don't want to talk about it"step 5) drink camo H20
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:24 (five years ago) link
Way to snake my Camo H2O ad pitch, bro. (punches wall)
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:27 (five years ago) link
(damn...that hydrated guy is so manly...)
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:42 (five years ago) link
Maybe my ctrl+f skills are failing me atm, but I'm frankly flabbergasted that no one itt ever brought up Devour, the frozen meals you just can't wait to bone.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:49 (five years ago) link
there are very few times in my life where I've understood the "punch a wall" impulse but I've heard a ridiculous number of stories of others doing so
― mh, Friday, 10 May 2019 20:18 (five years ago) link
https://i.imgur.com/6oyGkCA.png?1
― pplains, Saturday, 11 May 2019 00:10 (five years ago) link
just overheard on a television i could not see: THE PLAID SHIRT HAS SIGNIFIED STRENGTH FOR OVER 100 YEARS
― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 4 June 2019 23:42 (four years ago) link
And the plaid skirt did for 1000 years before that, fuckers!
― Una Palooka Dronka (hardcore dilettante), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 01:46 (four years ago) link