^ Like
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 16:53 (seven years ago) link
"This is normal"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 16:55 (seven years ago) link
"Giant steps are what you take, climbing on the Moon"
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 17:24 (seven years ago) link
Contenderizer x2
― poor fiddy-less albion (darraghmac), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 18:15 (seven years ago) link
"There's really nothing to it."Submitted by Throop Wilder, Lincoln, Mass. "If you see the cartoonist, have him drop me a line."Submitted by J. Michael Shanley, Marshfield, Mass. "Because it's not there."Submitted by Susan Robinson, Willow, N.Y.
― Mark G, Monday, 25 July 2016 14:27 (seven years ago) link
http://www.newyorker.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/160801_contest-690.jpg
― Mark G, Monday, 25 July 2016 14:28 (seven years ago) link
"I want to cut cable"
― socka flocka-jones (man alive), Monday, 25 July 2016 15:09 (seven years ago) link
"im just really struugling with the glass ceiling at work"
― poor fiddy-less albion (darraghmac), Monday, 25 July 2016 15:43 (seven years ago) link
"you need a taller door, dickweed"
― a simba man (Will M.), Monday, 25 July 2016 15:43 (seven years ago) link
"I'm sleeping with another giraffe, who looks exactly identical to both of us"
― socka flocka-jones (man alive), Monday, 25 July 2016 15:51 (seven years ago) link
"I never thought putting an unplugged LCD television in the middle of our room would work - and I was right"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:09 (seven years ago) link
"Who's got a long neck and rams his TV table up against a couch? This guy!!!!"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:11 (seven years ago) link
"don't get short with me!!!!!"
― brownie, Monday, 25 July 2016 17:11 (seven years ago) link
"put some clothes on"
"Let's Neckflix and chill. Get it? Neck flix"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:12 (seven years ago) link
"Did you do something different with your tail? Come on Lisa.. Why won't you talk to me?? Oh yeah, giraffes can't talk"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:14 (seven years ago) link
"I'm not going to stick my neck out for the DNC when I can watch the convention from home"
― mh, Monday, 25 July 2016 17:17 (seven years ago) link
"I am sick of not having balsamic vinegar"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:42 (seven years ago) link
I don't know how you can watch that garbage anyway... Come on, why are you being like this? I said I was sorry, and actually I think you'll find that "cow" is simply the correct term
― kasybian (wins), Monday, 25 July 2016 17:44 (seven years ago) link
Can we just watch more Friday Night Lights tonight? I know The Wire is good and all but I kind of just want to turn my brain off. You know? It's been a really hard day. I had accounting up my ass the entire day about some receipts I lost while I was at that conference in Philly. It's like, "guys, I will pay the thirteen dollars myself. You don't need to be such pricks about it." But no, they have to cross every T and dot every I. Seriously, I think they'd save money if they didn't have to chase down meaningless bullshit like this. So I had to e-mail the hotel and get them to FAX me the receipt. Fax, right? Can you believe it? In 20-goddamn-16? I couldn't even find the fax machine. I've been at that office for six years... and I'd never seen the fax machine. Did you buy more acacia leaves? That's what giraffes eat.
― a simba man (Will M.), Monday, 25 July 2016 18:23 (seven years ago) link
"Your neck is fine — all those actresses are just horses with spots painted on."
― Rimsky-Koskenkorva (Øystein), Monday, 25 July 2016 18:35 (seven years ago) link
lol Will M
― socka flocka-jones (man alive), Monday, 25 July 2016 18:55 (seven years ago) link
"Look I know the job search can feel overwhelming, but just start with the high-hanging fruit."
― never have i been a blue calm sea (collardio gelatinous), Monday, 25 July 2016 18:57 (seven years ago) link
"I just voted you off the island"
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:27 (seven years ago) link
"I feel that I should mention the elephant in the room."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:48 (seven years ago) link
"I only watch TV for the nature documentaries."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:49 (seven years ago) link
"I don't even own a television. Because I'm a fucking giraffe."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:50 (seven years ago) link
"If I see Jeremy Clarkson on TV again, I swear I'll put my foot through the screen."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:53 (seven years ago) link
"Where's the remote?"
"I told you we should have bought the three seater."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:55 (seven years ago) link
"I was thinking of buying an XBox One, but then I heard that the PVR functionality is crap. So I considered a PS4, but then I heard about the upgraded consoles that Microsoft and Sony are coming out with in a few months and thought I'd hold off a bit. Or do you think that I should buy an HTPC instead?"
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 20:58 (seven years ago) link
"Can you adjust the Vertical Hold?"
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 21:00 (seven years ago) link
'Where's Keith?'
― Mark G, Monday, 25 July 2016 21:01 (seven years ago) link
"Is this 4K or only HD?"
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 21:01 (seven years ago) link
"I told you that you should've used the wrist strap on the Wiimote."
― and all the politicians making crazy sounds (snoball), Monday, 25 July 2016 21:05 (seven years ago) link
"My penis is the size of a man's arm."
http://www.newyorker.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/160808_contest-690.jpg
The rankings overall for that contest, with the whale crushing the guy on the desert island were lower than usual. I don't think that's because less funny people entered the contest. I think it's due to the difficulty of captioning the particular image.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 23 August 2016 13:38 (seven years ago) link
has any ilxor ever won? has any caption posted here ever been finalist?
― a simba man (Will M.), Tuesday, 23 August 2016 14:47 (seven years ago) link
Ahem
Well, the same one i posted
― poor fiddy-less albion (darraghmac), Tuesday, 23 August 2016 18:30 (seven years ago) link
Was it that swimming pool one? I forget the name.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 23 August 2016 18:36 (seven years ago) link
Six bullets/ nine lives cat mouse one iirc
― poor fiddy-less albion (darraghmac), Tuesday, 23 August 2016 18:41 (seven years ago) link
Ah, right. Golden.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 23 August 2016 18:47 (seven years ago) link
http://www.newyorker.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/170213_contest-690.jpg
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 08:58 (seven years ago) link
Tempting but I've a new suit I'm trying to fit into
― Betsy DeVos Ayes (darraghmac), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 10:08 (seven years ago) link
suit/fig leaf I spose
― Betsy DeVos Ayes (darraghmac), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 10:14 (seven years ago) link
Who's 'mom'?
― Betsy DeVos Ayes (darraghmac), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 10:17 (seven years ago) link
Show's yer pie.
― Heavy Doors (jed_), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 10:19 (seven years ago) link
Actually its a shepherd's pie
― cajunsunday, Wednesday, 8 February 2017 10:37 (seven years ago) link
The shitty new yorker cartoon captions tumblr is killing it with this one
http://68.media.tumblr.com/36fea9606d1e176e3d27c65ac86125f4/tumblr_ol0kp0o5zs1qfvz38o1_400.png
― Camaraderie at Arms Length, Wednesday, 8 February 2017 11:19 (seven years ago) link
https://twitter.com/delrayser/status/828711097729445888
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 February 2017 13:57 (seven years ago) link