Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/03/26/p465/120326_contest_p465.jpg

Damn it! Mine was better.

xpost

"This isn't what I meant when I asked you to lock up the house."

"marco"

"It took me ten hours to inflate, you can at least turn around and look at it."

nice one forks!

"Sigmund's all grown up now Johnny. He can hold his own with his crazy family."

"For goodness sake, I don't care what Maud got up to with hers! We really need a poolboy"

"Oh god, why did it just get about 20 degrees warmer in here?"

"Believe me, it's what's under the ground water that's most interesting."

"marco"

― Wesley Crusher: Teenage F#ck Machine (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, March 20, 2012 10:40 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this actually made me laugh, it cannot win

"I could play bass, but c'mon, THREE bass players?"

"did you remember to use the SPF 75?"

Loch Ness called, they want their patio furniture back

"You don't want to wake the dragon." /obvious

"You sure you want to pass on this psilocybin tea?"

forks ftw

but also:

"prepare to die"

"i thought you said you cleaned the pool"

"no, really, i love your mother. she can stay as long as she wants."

"i know the piranha were getting to be a problem, but..."

"i picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue"

"This is Norman"

"prepare to die" should be a caption in more nyer toons, esp the ones with some boring couple sitting on couches

"Just til they get back off holiday you say?"

"Told you that dwarven pool company was a mistake"

"did you remember to level up honey?"

poolboy caption is pretty good.

this is a pretty tough one, I think.

"You know, this is a bit improbable from the perspective of volume displacement"

the pic is not that funny on its own, is the problem

and it's a chinese dragon, another kink

...or maybe i'm mis-seeing it

"Calling it Eliot Nessie doesn't make it cute. Or a pet."

"and you wondered why that pool cleaner had a sword and a shield"

"For god's sake George just give him his ring back"

"You might want to say "Beetlejuice" three times round about now"

"No, YOU deal with it."

"when i asked you to start 'draggin' the pool for leaves, this isn't what i meant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

'level up' ftw

"I've heard this is normal."

"I'm not trying to be cruel, I'm just saying that... oh god, he's right behind me, isn't he?"

and it's a chinese dragon, another kink

How do you know??? IS IT TRYING TO STEAL YR JOB??

lol sorry, something about all the fins and no wings made me think it was

you can tell the dragon is chinese because in his new monologue, mike daisey is lying about it.

^^ winner, you'd better submit it.

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/04/02/p465/120402_contest_p465.jpg

If it weren't for Megan, I wouldn't know where my head would be at.

They're going to get a million variations on this, aren't they.

"..."

"Let's never fight over a girl again."

"I went in with an entirely different meaning of giving head."

Wait, where are we going? I don't know, I have no head. Aaaaaaah!

"My name is Ichabod, too! What are the odds?"

"The sacrifices we make for our kids."