It's the King of The Hill "Major Characters" poll I tell you what.

PEGGY HILL!

easy

Dale.

"I loved my dad like a father. And he betrayed me - like a betrayer."

dale gribble. no contest.

It's funny, I thought I would be saying Boomhauer right up until I pressed the button for Bill.

Too many great moments - the touchdown record, dressing up as Lenore, building the barbeque. Plus every failed relationship; the vicar, the governor, THE MOP, the drunk driver...

toss-up between Peggy and Rusty Shackleford for me

http://www.download.com/i/dl/vdl/media/image/88/22/2288_320x240.jpg

espn chris mortensen is bobby hill

Boomhauer is my guru.

would "propane accessories" be considered a secondary character?

yeah difficult to decide between Peggy and Dale. Gone for Dale though, i hope the result is a tie

"Mistakes were made, and then, some more larger mistakes"

Bill, obv.

bobby

I thought Cotton's send off the other night was very good, btw, and pretty unexpected. A better show than average for these later seasons, worthy of the glory years of seasons 4-7.

Hank: Does Bobby have a girlfriend?
[Reads Valentine]
Hank: "Happy Valentine's Day, Joseph. Love Bobby"? "Hey hot stuff"? Bobby, you can't give this to Joseph.
Bobby Hill: Why not? He IS hot stuff. You should see him skateboard.

Bobby Hill: Why do you hate what you don't understand, Dad?
Hank: I don't hate you, Bobby.
Bobby Hill: I meant soccer.

Catholic School Student: Sister Hill? I really like going to church. Does that mean I can give it up for Lent?
Peggy Hill: Well, now... ,I don't think God would like that very much, but you've caught him in a loophole. Good for you!

Speaker: That's basically what entrepreneurism is. Any questions?
Peggy Hill: Yes. I find that I am too busy being successful so I have trouble remembering all of my bright ideas. That's why I keep a folder.
Speaker: Uhh... That wasn't really a question. It was more of a comment.
Peggy Hill: Oh, why thank you.

[Hank is at the doctor's office, having injured his lower back]
Doctor: I'm sorry, Mr. Hill, I understand it's painful, but soft tissue injury just doesn't show up on film.
Hank: Hunh. So how do you fix it?
Doctor: Well, there's really nothing *I* can do. What your back needs is rest. Just have your office send over the Worker's Compensation forms and I'll sign off on 'em.
Hank: Worker's Comp? Do I look like a hobo to you? No, sir, I'm *not* going on welfare. It's Indian summer!
Doctor: Well, if you insist on working, I'll write you a prescription for pain medicine.
Hank: Whoa there, Dr. Feelgood. I work at a propane dealership, not Woodstock.
Doctor: Then I'm sorry, but all Western medicine can really offer you are drugs... *and nothing.* But some people have had good luck with yoga. I hear there's a studio over in McMainerberry.
Hank: Yoga? Isn't that a cult?
Doctor: The group that rented the space before them was a cult. That's probably what you're thinking of.

Peggy Hill: What if I'm not as smart as I always thought. What if I'm... average?
Hank: Peggy, you have an IQ of 175. You said so yourself.
Peggy Hill: Well, there could be a margin of error. Especially since it's my own estimate.

Peggy??? She can, single handedly, kill an episode faster than hell can scorch a feather.

Peggy Hill: Hank, the day after Thanksgiving is, in my opinion, the biggest shopping day of the year.

I win!
http://animatedtv.about.com/library/graphics/kohBobbyGoesNuts.jpg

how can The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall read these quotes and think that

Bill Dauterive: I wish I had a son to kick me in the nuts.
[Dale suddenly kicks Bill in the groin]
Dale Gribble: Be careful what you wish for.

where's ethan?

They reran this one the other day:

Restaurant Manager: What do you think you're doing?
Cotton Hill: These folks was waitin', so I'm showin' 'em to their table.
Restaurant Manager: All right, you are the greeter. Your job is to greet. The hostess shows the clients to their table. Now, please, go back to your stool...
Cotton Hill: Listen to me, Junior. I led a platoon through the jungle of Sai-Ke. I think I can lead a party of four to table six.

because her lines are not funny. well - ok - there's a few decent ones up there. but for the most part she is the weight tied around this shows waist.

maybe it's because she reminds me of someone i know. one of my best friends' mom - a total know-it-all hyper-reactive imbecile.

xposts!

the thing is, you are totally wrong

you knew my friend's mom?

what is her name?

Heggy Pill.

its true, you are totally wrong

This is such a great, under appreciated show.

I love the little moments where the overall story changes (Redcorn and Nancy breaking up, Hank finally telling Peggy how insufferable she can be). It's never some kind of pointless "Maude Flanders dies" gambit, but the kind of evolution in relationships that would be inevitable in life, keeping the show from truly devolving into shtick. I've only seen the stuff on DVD but its pretty awesome straight through. There's no way I could pick just one character.

Fuck it, I'm voting for Bobby anyway.

I tellawha dangdere tawwnabouta CHEE, man. Aina foolatawn dandare jacuzzi. You tallinputta fixin'a vo fer Peggy Hill, man.

Bobby has the most roffles.

in the supporting/minor characters poll i'll vote for monsignor martinez

I'll probably go for Buck. Guess I'm just a sucker for Stephen Root.

Bobby very much resembles me in 6th grade

ouch

what made you give up your dream career of prop comic?

Boomhauer / Redcorn fite.

these tv character polls are becoming the ILE version of geir album polls.

hwat

HANK: What the hell were you thinking, digging a tunnel under my house?

DALE: You should be flattered. Think of it as a two-way friendship tube. I can escape to your house when the Feds come a-knockin', and you can slip over to mine when some jealous husband comes looking for you.

PEGGY: There will always be husbands jealous of Hank for marrying me. There is no place on earth he can hide from them.

It's a toss-up between Bill and Boomhauer. Boomhauer's surfing episode (was that this season) was just terrific.

For the minor character I'm voting for the "Vaya Con Dios!" priest on the Mexican soap opera.

how the fuck is buck strickland not on this

BOBBY I GOT PROPANE IN MY ERUETHRA

dale

impossible decision to make, really. most of the characters reach the level of "awesome," nearly impossible to rate beyond that, imo.

In the episode "Tankin' it to the Streets", Dale claims to have completed a Russian correspondence course and can speak the language, though his application of this in handling an Abrams M1A1 tank isn't exactly flawless.

BILL: Hank, you can't fight the Army without declaring war.
DALE: Maybe if you had the Marines on your side.
BILL: M-hm, they're better than us.

SOCCER MOM # 1: I know it's bigger than the other SUVs, but it makes me feel safe. I mean, if I have an accident in that thing, I'm going to live.
SOCCER MOM # 2: Well, for me, it's all about convenience. Mine's got everything from headlight wipers to heated seats.
PEGGY: Oh, yes, that is a must, isn't it? My butt is always either warmed by my car seat or covered by my sweater. I have to keep it at optimum temperature or I could die from mild discomfort. And you know what else would make me die? If by mistake I paid so much attention to my child's game that I maybe raised my voice. Oh, I would just die! Or if I got stuck with a bunch of losers who could not recognize a dead-on Fat Albert impression, well, I would just die a thousand deaths. You know what? I have got a football game to watch.

^^^this has me leaning towards Peggy

LUANNE: Bobby, my camping trip's been cancelled and the shelter says I have to be battered to stay there. So can I go with you to Cotton's?
BOBBY: No way. This is my last chance for Grandpa to spoil me before the baby's born. You stay away from him. He's mine. He doesn't even know your name.
LUANNE: Yes, he does. I'm "Missy Melons."

from 'soldier of misfortune':

DALE: Mad Dog's running for president. He's already got the black vote -- Earl -- and the gay vote -- Earl.

DALE: Me having an accidental discharge is like you giving a sales pitch for a grill, and not even mentioning the convenient warming plate.
HANK: Oh, I can't even -- no! God, no!

DALE: The falcon has the egg. By "egg" I mean briefcase. Oh, and this is Dale, from the ad.

DALE: I should have known it was too good to be true. Fourteen years I've been running that ad, and not one call. Then, suddenly -- one call.

DALE: I should have known it was too good to be true. Fourteen years I've been running that ad, and not one call. Then, suddenly -- one call.

This is seriously one of the greatest lines ever, anywhere.

"you don't know who I am but i know where you live..."

BILL: They look Japanese.
DALE: Nope. I think they're Chinese.
BILL: How can you tell?
DALE: Japanese guys usually have glasses and a suit and a tie, and stuff like that.

DALE: They'll probably get you with a blow-dart. That's their way. But you'll just think it's a mosquito bite, until you die. Then you'll know the truth.

DALE: I hate to see Nancy cooped up all Sunday playing that Boggle. It's a beautiful day. She ought to be outside hanging my laundry.

HANK: Dale, what are you doing here?
DALE: I followed you. Every twist and every turn. By the way, I'm going to need to follow you home.

DALE: Wrestling a girl. That's a tough one, Bobby. If you win, you get the shame of having beat up a girl. If you lose, you just better hope she snaps your neck. That's the quickest way.

DALE: You gotta do something to sweep her off those big feet, Hank. Toss a little woo at her, see what sticks.
HANK: I don't know. I used up all my good material winning Peggy over the first time.
DALE: Maybe you can steal something from a movie, like Lethal Weapon. Man, those two guys loved each other.

DALE: You told Bobby to listen to Jimmy Witchard? He was in my gun club. People say he fried his brain one day staring at the sun. 'Course, he couldn't have been to smart to do that in the first place. Kind of a chicken-egg thing.

NANCY: Dale, get out of the hot tub. We're stealing a news van.
DALE: It's the perfect crime. How would they cover it?

DALE: Come on, you know you're Bill.
BILL: No, no, I don't know that. I'm Lenore.
DALE: Well, if you're Lenore, then where's Bill?
BILL: Uh, Bill's in the house. Want me to go get him?
DALE: I'm skeptical that you could, yet intrigued that you may.

HANK: I told you to stop sending my dad "The Gribble Report."
DALE: You tell me a lot of things, Hank. Most of which I publish.

Dale has just crashed a digger into a brick wall
DALE: Hank, you were right about it being complicated but wrong to make me want to try it so badly.

DALE (into a tape recorder): 10:15, Hank picks up Hal.
BILL: What?
(Dale rewinds the tape and plays it back.)
DALE (on the tape): 10:15, Hank picks up Hal.
BILL (on the tape): What?
DALE: I said, "10:15, Hank picks up Hal!"

DALE: It is I, Dale Gribble, man of a thousand faces. You just met face two: the deaf electrician. I couldn't help but overhear your uncle's bad advice. The only thing your roommates, i.e. enemy, understand is psychological warfare, i.e. dirty tricks. It worked for Dick Nixon. For example, get some goat's blood, then taint that blood. Then when your roommates need blood, give them the tainted goat's blood. It's a perfect plan.
LUANNE: I don't want to hurt anybody, I just want them to do the dishes.
DALE: Oh, well, in that case, put the dishes in the shower. That's how Nancy gets me to do them

BILL: You can't blame Hank for being attatched to his truck. He loves it. And that's what you do when you love something -- you cling to it so it doesn't try to run away.
DALE: I've had my van for ten years. At the first sign of weakness, I'll shoot her myself!

GOVERNOR RICHARDS: You guys like baseball?
DALE: If you're trying to smoke out the Communists, relax. We're all cool.

DALE: Ah, Memorial Day. A day when our war heroes are celebrated by even the most liberal of media.

DALE: This tornado's already at level two on the Fujisaki scale. A storm that strong can send an egg through a barn door. Two if one door is open.
BOBBY: What does a level three do, Mr. Gribble?
DALE: A level three can send an egg through a brick wall. Tornado chasers call it Humpty's Revenge.

DALE: Hank, I wouldn't use that remote.
(Hank clicks on the remote. Sound of an explosion offscreen.)
DALE: There goes the mailbox.
HANK: You have an exploding mailbox!?
DALE: That was your mailbox. And yes, I do.

DALE: This is his chance to be cool, Hank, and you only get one chance. I know.
(Flashback: Dale is running in the halls at Arlen High School.)
PRINCIPAL: Whoa, Gribble, where's the fire?
DALE'S BRAIN: Say "In your wife's pants!" Say it!
KID: In your wife's pants!
(All the cool kids laugh.)
YOUNG DALE (too late): In your wife's pants!

DALE: Whoa! Hold on, son! I want you to keep an open mind so you can make an informed decision! If you want, you can read a bloated government report on smoking, or go straight to the horse's mouth and get the facts from the tobacco industry.

DALE: TV sets are getting smaller and smaller, and bigger and bigger. Soon the medium-sized set will be a thing of the past.

DALE: There is a small-to-large chance you will develop high-altitude pulminary adaema, meaning your capillaries to flood with fluid, preventing adequate oxygenation, and a spiral of worsening hypoxia, leading to a slow and painful death.
BILL: I don't think I want that.
DALE: That's why I brought the gun. If you start feeling any shortness of breath, rub your belly and I will give you one of Doctor Dale's 38 caliber pain pills.

DALE: You know what a real friend would do? Get me to burn down said other friend's failing business for the insurance money. Just say the word. Or don't. I'll get the signal. Just nod. Or don't.
HANK: Shut up, Dale.
DALE: So we're on.

DALE: Kahn has a mother? Somehow I always pictured a pod situation.

DALE: I hope the new neighbor isn't another Kahn. His cracks about Peggy are funny, but apart from that, he's completely useless.

DALE: The less kids know about money, the less likely they are to rat you out under pressure of a Federal investigation

DALE: Don't worry, Boomhauer, Patch may have beat you to the altar, but you'll beat him to the grave. As a bachelor, your life expectancy is seven years shorter than us blissfully marrieds. Even Bill gets a couple of years' credit for that charade of a marriage of his.

DALE (on his last meal): I'd ask for the world's rarest truffle. Then while they were searching for it, I'd tunnel my way to freedom. Of course, then I'd miss eating the world's rarest truffle. Quite the quandary.

DALE (to Hank): Bobby loves God, you worship the devil. Dinner times must be tense.

DALE: Let's just say mistakes were made. Then other, larger mistakes.

PRINCIPAL MOSS: Sorry I'm late. It took longer than I thought to wipe the eggs off my car.
DALE: Sorry I'm late. It took longer than I thought to egg Moss's car.

DALE (giving his turtle a cigarette): Find land. Plant this. I will meet you at the rendezvous.

DALE: Pirate? Gondola operator? Waiter? Pirate waiter?
HANK: He's supposed to be gay, Dale.
DALE: Really? I don't see it.

DALE: They're always talking about college, but have any of you ever actually seen one?

HANK: You disappoint me, Dale.
DALE: Get in line.

HANK: Where am I supposed to get mice?
DALE: I left a plate of bacon in your attic -- you should have plenty by nightfall.

DALE (threatening to destroy his kidney): Come any closer and this baby's good for nothing but an Englishman's breakfast.
HANK: Dale, just hold on. Let's talk about this.
DALE: No! Now, I'm going to need an unmarked jet and two parachutes, one kidney-sized.

DALE: Hank, it sounds like you did everything right except giving away my kidney. And since I traded it for a bunch of kiddie toys, I guess we both let me down.

DALE: Cotton's got to go. But he's got Hank behind him, and Hank's the alpha neighbor. I'm gamma or delta at best.

DALE: You really shouldn't feel so worthless. I'm much more of a burden on my family, and I feel great.

DALE: You tell me what's crazier: that the government's free cheese contains surveillance devices to monitor America's underclass, as I once believed, or that you're a woman, as I now believe? If my government says you're a woman, I say, "enchante, madame." (Dale tries to kiss Hank's hand. Hank slaps his face.) Whoa. I think you've had enough to drink, sweetheart.

DALE: All I can say is, I wish I had the Smoking Bandit's courage. He's the Rosa Parks of nicotine.
BILL: He's a hero. Just like that guy who rides his bicycle faster than French people. I bet he smokes too.

HANK: Don't they say criminals always return to the scene of the crime?
DALE: Not if they don't want to get caught, Hank

DALE: Hank, I spat in the concrete, so when I mysteriously "disappear," you'll be able to create the perfect neighbor: half-man, half-driveway.

DALE: Credit cards are a last resort after cash, check, plasma, urine, and alien urine. Sure, there's bone marrow, but that is more prudently used as a retirement vehicle, or so says Lou Dobbs.

DALE: Listen! I've never been able to say this in my whole life, but as of 2 p.m. yesterday, I am a taxpayer. And I demand $36 worth of service. I know the chain of command, starting with your supervisor, Franklin Thomas, all the way up to the under-intendent of Transportation, Edward Dibble, whose daughters, Pat and Ellie, played ladybug soccer with the daughters of the President of the United States. And I'm not afraid to make some phone calls. I'm your worst nightmare. I have a three-line phone, and absolutely nothing at all to do with my time!

HANK: Come on, Bill, how about a beer?
BILL: Beer is a depressant, Hank.
HANK: Don't go blaming the beer.

I love Bobby so much! I want to paint a 3" tall portrait of him for my room.

Hank Hill: Peg, I'm trying to control an outbreak, and you're driving the monkey to the airport!

That's a pretty small portrait, Abbott.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Another solid ep tonight, with the Co-op selling out to Megalomart and Hank turning organic food snob.

"Don't be ridiculous. Tomatoes don't have any taste. MM!"

"you know how the smell of propane gives you goosebumps? well for me it's the smell of children learning spanish."

dale: joseph you're an alien!
joseph: wait, i'm from outer space? like ET?
dale: well, no. he was a purebred alien with a heart of gold, you're half-human and can sometimes be self-absorbed

love this show so much lately

it also feels *much* more appropriate late night on adult swim than it did primetime on fox

episode where peggy thinks she's a genius is great

hank (to peggy): you've got an IQ of 170, you've said so yourself plenty of times

---

dale (to hank): nancy is a genius... a genius at having a great can

in the thanksgiving episode where john redcorn yearns to be a father to joseph

john redcorn: "joseph hates me"
dale: "why would joseph hate you? he barely knows you"

bobby: "i'm glad the cowboys lost today, after all they did to the indians"
hank: "dammit, now don't bring them into it"

I saw an episode recently where Dale actually read the Warren Commission Report and concluded the government had been telling the truth, and that he now had to trust the government 100%. It was basically perfec6t.

hank's extensive vocabulary of dismayed sounds & expressions is the funniest thing in the world to me lately... i pretty much die any time he reacts in horror to anything bobby does

Fave Hank line = "There'd better be a naked cheerleader in that closet" to Bobby

http://i51.tinypic.com/4u6idt.png

i wd vote for Dale if we did this poll again

Bobby, Hank, Bill, Peggy & Dale are the pantheon for me. I think Bobby's the character I have the most affection for, but Hank makes me laugh the hardest. Dale's great but I'm glad he's a supporting character. I think Bill's a little underrated.

http://i54.tinypic.com/111tv13.jpg

would "propane accessories" be considered a secondary character?

― burt_stanton, Tuesday, November 13, 2007 10:42 AM (nine years ago)

This is the hardest I've ever known someone didn't watch the thing they were writing about pic.twitter.com/0tAHfx9rj8

— Jacob Oller (@JacobOller) June 13, 2017

lol truth

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1_srb7wcTA

It's a funny scene when Hank becomes sexually aroused setting up the propane heating system for the Gribble's hot tub.

I love the one where he thinks he's having dirty dreams about Nancy but it turns out he's just fantasizing about their grill

http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/dale-were-stealing-a-news-van.jpg

Despite that golden classic, my favorites were always Boomhauer and Lucky.

Loved Luanne

Bobby is the best because he was voiced by Pamela Adlon and because of this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1u4oXXL1a5A

dang answer to this is obviously Hank Hill

Minh Souphanousinphone is very underrated too; she gets some great stories in the final seasons

boomhauer always makes me laugh

all the dialogue quotes upthread are killin me

"Bills, bills, bills...why do we keep getting Bill's mail?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOEuY5lWENg&feature=youtu.be&a

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOEuY5lWENg

i haven't seen this show in years and years but oh man every bit here is so otm it makes me realize that hank hill is an all-time-great character

https://bostonpewg.org/2019/07/12/labor-theory-of-king-of-the-hill/

this is great i tell ya hwat

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdyGfiIirD8

peggy offering to buy a "meñora" to accomodate hank's mom's jewish boyfriend during their stay at the hill residence for christmas is just one of many amazing details i've had the pleasure to re-discover as i've been re-watching the series these past two weeks. pretty impressive how great the show was pretty much right out the gate.