Fear of death.

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How do you people cope with the idea of your own mortality? I'm asking this because for several years fear of death has been the biggest fear in my life. Of course, being relatively young, it doesn't govern my life or anything, but there's no way for me to get around it. I'm an atheist-materialist, so I don't believe in any sort of afterlife. Whenever I really start thinking about death, I'm faced with the total unfairness of the idea that my existence, which I've mostly enjoyed so far, has to end. The only solution I've found is to try not to think of death, because there's no way I can reconciliate with it. I'm especially bewildered by other atheists who can live seemingly without this fear, I wonder how they do it.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:18 (thirteen years ago) link

I cope by fearing the inevitable collapse of civilisation a lot more

electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:22 (thirteen years ago) link

http://www.underestimator.com/hirst.jpg

JimD (JimD), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:26 (thirteen years ago) link

The only solution I've found is to try not to think of

That's my solution for a lot of things too.

StanM (StanM), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:28 (thirteen years ago) link

Consider the lily.

Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:33 (thirteen years ago) link

I could quote my zen "stare death in the face so you know what life is" thing again but that'd be the third time so I wont.

Trayce (trayce), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:36 (thirteen years ago) link

Steve: this is creepy, stop it. (Between my previous post and now I've been thinking about getting an espresso machine. The shop nearest my home is selling machines from a famous Italian brand and also a couple of others, but I was considering the illy.)

StanM (StanM), Monday, 13 February 2006 10:45 (thirteen years ago) link

silly

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:04 (thirteen years ago) link

when you're dead you won't feel the need to enjoy life anymore. so it's awesome innit.

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:05 (thirteen years ago) link

Sorry, you only exist in my head

splates (splates), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:10 (thirteen years ago) link

that's just my cock

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:12 (thirteen years ago) link

I don't fear death at all. I try to find out as much as I can about the gory details (Not ogrish type stuff, just the biological side of things) and I find that has helped me see it for what is and really helped put a bit of a fire under me regarding not wasting my time of the planet.

It's inevitable, so I'm not going to waste time fearing it.

She's been known to sleep on piles of dry leaves... (papa november), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:13 (thirteen years ago) link

....oh and I don't believe in any kind of afterlife either. This is it.

She's been known to sleep on piles of dry leaves... (papa november), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:14 (thirteen years ago) link

I don't fear death at all.
Ditto.

Never understood what's to be scared of.

not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:35 (thirteen years ago) link

I'm not afraid of death as I don't see it as something unfamiliar.

Gary (Seuss 2005), Monday, 13 February 2006 11:35 (thirteen years ago) link

A relative of mine was recently diagnosed as terminally ill. I haven't been speaking to him since then, but I gather he is a bit upset about it. Yet he is pretty religious, so you would think he would be all excited about soon getting to hang out with the baby Jesus and stuff.

The lesson I have taken from this is that religion is rubbish - what is the point of it if it does not even comfort you in the face of your own mortality?

DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:08 (thirteen years ago) link

Never understood what's to be scared of.

you're not scared by the idea that you could die at any time theoretically?

Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:27 (thirteen years ago) link

No, I’ve been racking my brain since 1st posting on here before (although I should be working) and I really can’t think of anything.
What scares people about it?

not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:34 (thirteen years ago) link

A lot of people with whom I've talked about this have said that I shouldn't fear death, because all these thoughts bothering me will be gone the minute I stop breathing. But I think death is still this sort of incomprehensible black blot on the edge of our consciousness, something I can never face. I mean, sorta like you can't go outside your body and mind to have some sort of objective view on things, you as an existing sentient thing can't imagine a state wher you don't exist. Sure, it's easy to comprehend on a theoretical level, but not on a personal level.

Also, I guess my fear of death has more to do with the shortness of life than death itself. I enjoy living and would much prefer it to the other option, so the fact that one third of it (or more) is gone already feels totally unfair.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:35 (thirteen years ago) link

a; Electricv sound OTM.
b; Worrying about stuff only makes it more likely to happen.
c; Death is like sleeping and I like sleeping.
d; The act of dying and the specifics thereof concern me more than the state of death.
e; Why?

Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:37 (thirteen years ago) link

Worrying about stuff only makes it more likely to happen.

No, worrying or not worrying has no real bearing on the likelihood surely.

Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:39 (thirteen years ago) link

What scares people about it?

What's not to be scared about? I'm afraid I don't view my total annihilation with equanimity. I don't want to be dead, I want to be alive. Would you really be totally indifferent if you were told you were going to die tomorrow?

Revivalist (Revivalist), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:40 (thirteen years ago) link

it has some bearing on the likelihood

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:46 (thirteen years ago) link

Death is like sleeping and I like sleeping.

Sleep is called "the little death" in some Islamic writings.

Don't you death-fearers fear not waking up when you go to sleep?

StanM (StanM), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:47 (thirteen years ago) link

Sleep is very different from death, because it's a transitory stage (i.e. you know you're going to wake up eventually) and your mind is active even then. I sometimes think of the idea of not waking up when I go to sleep, but I tell myself that the probability is rather small at this stage of my life.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:49 (thirteen years ago) link

I don't fear BEING dead, but yes I fear dying. I fear it happening young, before I've done everything I want to do, I fear it being painful, I fear the hurt it would cause other people. That's it really.

Archel (Archel), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:49 (thirteen years ago) link

Worrying about stuff only makes it more likely to happen.

No, worrying or not worrying has no real bearing on the likelihood surely.

I think that people can subconsciously make themselves more likely to encounter certain circumstances if they worry overtly and disproportionatly about them - for instance if you are terrified of being run over by a car you will become increasingly nervous around cars, more likely to panic and thus more likely to be run over by accident. Same goes for other things. I think the subsconscious mind can obsess over things to the point where you put yourself in situations where you're likely to encounter those things without realising. With relationships, for instance - if someone is terrified that their partner might leave them and allows that fear to influence their behaviour then it may well drive the partner away. If you're scared of twisting an ankle playing football then you're likely to carry yourself awkwardly, tense muscles that shouldn't be tensed, and thus injure yourself. Etcetera.

Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Monday, 13 February 2006 13:55 (thirteen years ago) link

living= going out, going to work & paying bills.
death = none of the above.

not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:16 (thirteen years ago) link

Death is almost always unwelcome. Fuck death.

Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:38 (thirteen years ago) link

I'm not doing it.

Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:39 (thirteen years ago) link

I go to Transylvania to offer myself to the Count.

Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:39 (thirteen years ago) link

only thing i don't like about death is that it'd make my family very upset.

otherwise i don't really care. there really isn't anything that i particularly want to do that i haven't done ever since i've given up on ever having a perfect game in bowling.

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:44 (thirteen years ago) link

that and katie holmes

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:45 (thirteen years ago) link

I go to Transylvania to offer myself to the Count.

he'll turn you away if you're over nine-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:48 (thirteen years ago) link

I don't fear what's on the Other Side, but I would like to avoid a prolonged deterioration leading up to death. I still think that check-out clinic that Edward G. Robinson goes to in Soylent Green would be the best way out ever.

pixel farmer (Rock Hardy), Monday, 13 February 2006 14:51 (thirteen years ago) link

Death is almost always unwelcome
Unless you're the suicidering type.

not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 13 February 2006 15:04 (thirteen years ago) link

i like Heidegger's distinction between death and demise.

demise: something that is gonna happen later, in the future. (often, we ALWAYS think it will happen later, so we never really face that we will have to experience our "demise")

death: right now! always with you.

ryan (ryan), Monday, 13 February 2006 15:39 (thirteen years ago) link

Doubtless I'll be bemused by death as with everything else.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 13 February 2006 15:42 (thirteen years ago) link

I fear being dead and my body not being me any more: what if medical students dissect it and name it Polly? What if I become a skeleton and archaeologists find something interesting about it and display my bones in a museum as "20th C AD Female"? I don't like the idea of my physical body having a life completely disconnected from my memory and identity. I feel like the moral and reasonable thing to do would be to die and donate my body to science, but I'd much rather be cremated. I'd rather think that I will completely disappear than that I will break down into component parts, with the parts I consider important and definitive NOW becoming totally meaningless and forgotten. I think this is a horribly egotistical and unrealistic fear to have, so I'm trying to think my way through it, but it's not really working.

ps oddly enough i think this nabokov quote is beautiful and scary:
"I do not know that it has been noted before that one of the main characteristics of life is discreteness. Unless a film of flesh envelops us, we die. Man exists only insofar as he is separated from his surroundings. The cranium is a space-traveler's helmet. Stay inside or you perish. Death is divestment, death is communion. It may be wonderful to mix with the landscape, but to do so is the end of the tender ego."

Maria (Maria), Monday, 13 February 2006 15:45 (thirteen years ago) link

what if medical students dissect it and name it Polly?
i like polly, it's a lovely name. so that's one less worry you have.

not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 13 February 2006 15:54 (thirteen years ago) link

Doesn't the dude in 101 Reykjavík say something like "Death isn't frightening. I was dead for a long time before I was born, and that was fine", or something like that? It's basically how I feel about it.

JimD (JimD), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:37 (thirteen years ago) link

But, you know, I don't really see how people can have problems with the concept of potential non-existence, given that they've experienced it in the past, before they started existing.

JimD (JimD), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:39 (thirteen years ago) link

We don't experience anything before or after our lives. It is the exactly the lack of experiencing that makes death so dreadful to me, because I like experiencing things. If I'd believe in some sort of afterlife, that would be cool because that'd mean I do get to experience something afterwards. But I don't.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:44 (thirteen years ago) link

but you won't have the dreadful feeling of not experiencing thing

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:51 (thirteen years ago) link

cos you'll be dead

ken c (ken c), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:52 (thirteen years ago) link

Experiencing things is ok.

JimD (JimD), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:52 (thirteen years ago) link

Well, that was the point I was trying to make earlier, of course I don't hate death after it's happened, only now. Of course it's an irrational fear, in the sense that you can't do anything about it, but that thought doesn't necessarily make it go away.

(x-post)

Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 13 February 2006 16:55 (thirteen years ago) link

also, isn't it weird how most of the people who ever lived are dead, and we can feel sorry for them for being dead and not experiencing the thing s we enjoy experiencing, but soon we will be dead and other living people will feel sorry for US?

Maria (Maria), Monday, 13 February 2006 17:10 (thirteen years ago) link

isn't it weird how most of the people who ever lived are dead,

Is this the case? With an exponentially increasing population, it's just possible that the numbers of people alive RIGHT NOW are more than half of all the people who have ever lived.

Although it's rather unlikely.

DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 13 February 2006 17:14 (thirteen years ago) link

co-sign

A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, 28 September 2012 21:02 (seven years ago) link

three weeks pass...
two months pass...

every so often i go into blissful periods where i'm no longer aware i'm going to be dead one day. reading this has revived that x 10 ... crazy to think one day our universe might not exist. damn you consciousness! i'm trying not to freak out at work atm.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timeline_of_the_far_future

Spectrum, Friday, 28 December 2012 14:49 (six years ago) link

pfft I for one am planning on escaping to parallel universes

iatee, Friday, 28 December 2012 15:17 (six years ago) link

three years pass...

Bowie's death, a family terminal illness and some acquaintance deaths have gotten to me and the other day I experienced an absolute terror/panic at the idea of nonexistence while on the subway.

I heard or read the horrifying idea somewhere once that maybe the final moment of our life is stretched out into a perceptual eternity. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Wondering what the source was.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:02 (three years ago) link

the thought of an enduring consciousness is terrifying, yet it's hard to wrap my head around (as it were) my consciousness just vanishing

http://www.theonion.com/article/you-still-die-one-day-52183

rip van wanko, Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:17 (three years ago) link

anesthesia helped me wrap my head around what it would be like to slip into dreamless, awarenessless blackness

welltris (crüt), Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:17 (three years ago) link

Reading the Looming Tower, I was struck by how much of that particular brand of extremist Islam seems to be a system for coping with the fear of death.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:19 (three years ago) link

I heard or read the horrifying idea somewhere once that maybe the final moment of our life is stretched out into a perceptual eternity.

features in this story, makes it sound like not at all that bad of a thing

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1995/09/25/bullet-in-the-brain

the late great, Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:44 (three years ago) link

whoops, sorry, that's paywalled

read here: http://pov.imv.au.dk/Issue_27/section_1/artc2A.html

the late great, Saturday, 16 January 2016 05:46 (three years ago) link

I heard or read the horrifying idea somewhere once that maybe the final moment of our life is stretched out into a perceptual eternity. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Wondering what the source was.

― on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, January 15, 2016 9:02 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh man, i came up with ^^this idea independently at a bar last week. iirc it was based on the whole "time slows down during traumatic situations" thing

lute bro (brimstead), Saturday, 16 January 2016 06:06 (three years ago) link

anyway, maybe read some buddhist stuff on pain and suffering, might assuage the fear somewhat. or maybe you know about that stuff already.

lute bro (brimstead), Saturday, 16 January 2016 06:10 (three years ago) link

the idea seems sort of similar to the Tibetan Book of the Dead. like you will just lock into these archetypes and get lost in an infinite dream of your own making.

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Saturday, 16 January 2016 06:11 (three years ago) link

U didn't exist once, it didn't kill u

Saoirse birther (darraghmac), Saturday, 16 January 2016 10:12 (three years ago) link

A very intense (mostly horrifying, occasionally glorious) mushroom trip in my mid 20s actually really helped me with this. Obviously not recommending that as a medicine, but it's a thing. Notable university nearby has been doing studies administering this to the terminally ill for the past few years.

Because some of the, uh, insights gained during that experience can dissipate and I don't want to make hallucinogens a part of my life, regular meditation and exploration of Buddhist thought (fairly cursory, but enough) have been immensely beneficial.

Realize a lot of the above is a huge turn off to a lot of people, but at the very least I think everyone should look into some form of meditation. Difficult but it pays off. I don't feel qualified to give pointers, but I know there are a few schooled folks here that could help with that.

circa1916, Saturday, 16 January 2016 10:51 (three years ago) link

Other people dying is just about the worst thing imaginable. It might good to brace yourself for it, in some cases, but allowing yourself to be afraid for the death of another involves walking around mourning something that's still alive, and kind of missing the point of life IMO. Talking about your own death, or fearing your own death seems absurd to me. I don't belive that anything that quiet or calm looking should inspire fear. Other emotions perhaps

rap is dad (it's a boy!), Saturday, 16 January 2016 15:02 (three years ago) link

i'm not sure how i stopped being (for the moment) terrified of death. i can logic through it- we're all going to die, nobody really knows what it's like, worrying about it isn't going to change a thing- but i don't think it's logic that's changed my attitude. we'll see how i feel when i get cancer or have a stroke or something.

diana krallice (rushomancy), Saturday, 16 January 2016 15:19 (three years ago) link

Death isn't always quiet or calm (post)

Half-baked profundities. Self-referential smirkiness (Bob Six), Saturday, 16 January 2016 15:54 (three years ago) link

Dying maybe, not always calm or quiet, what you're gonna have to do to get to death

rap is dad (it's a boy!), Saturday, 16 January 2016 16:07 (three years ago) link

In 'merica, death is *rarely* quiet or calm.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Saturday, 16 January 2016 16:12 (three years ago) link

Which is why I'd choose to die elsewhere.

mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Saturday, 16 January 2016 16:12 (three years ago) link

Classic

Mr. Snroombes (mattresslessness), Saturday, 16 January 2016 17:06 (three years ago) link

Unfortunately birth and death are the two things nobody has any choice in (aside from suicide ofc).

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Saturday, 16 January 2016 17:07 (three years ago) link

now that I have children I am legit terrified of dying

tremendous crime wave and killing wave (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Saturday, 16 January 2016 18:15 (three years ago) link

Well if I hadn't been put off before.....

Saoirse birther (darraghmac), Saturday, 16 January 2016 19:26 (three years ago) link

Legit tho my death benefits are p good from work its eased any of the "oh God the bills I'll leave etc" worries and the rest of it doesn't bother me so much.

Saoirse birther (darraghmac), Saturday, 16 January 2016 19:27 (three years ago) link

got a tombstone hand and a graveyard mind

mookieproof, Saturday, 16 January 2016 20:07 (three years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IRbwwbWyDs

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Saturday, 16 January 2016 20:08 (three years ago) link

I heard or read the horrifying idea somewhere once that maybe the final moment of our life is stretched out into a perceptual eternity. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Wondering what the source was.

― on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, January 15, 2016 9:02 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Was it my terrifying nightmare?

ledge, Saturday, 16 January 2016 22:26 (three years ago) link

I spent a year or two constantly afraid of experiencing painful death or injury, traumatic accidents, etc. like hourly painful thoughts. It's not fun. There has to be a way to not be afraid of death, right?

lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, 17 January 2016 02:48 (three years ago) link

You bastards have really bummed me out now, lol

lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, 17 January 2016 02:49 (three years ago) link

Like, I've been building a greater understanding and peaceful acceptance of death .. But when I read actual smart posters (i.e. pretty much everyone posting in this revive), it makes me think like I'm fooling myself and that there's no point in changing ones relationship with death.

lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, 17 January 2016 02:52 (three years ago) link

I don't know, I've pretty long thought of myself as someone at peace with the idea of death, but something shook me recently and I experienced the fear anew.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Sunday, 17 January 2016 02:54 (three years ago) link

my heart has stopped before when i was undergoing some heart surgery as a baby, but they got it started back up again, so that is a factor i have to consider, and i think it makes me lenient towards mysticism/reincarnation/post-human consciousness as a possibility. i still have some phantom pain or.... something.... from all of that (i was really sick as a youth) i dunno how to describe it but maybe it has always made me a little uncomfortable in my own body.

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Sunday, 17 January 2016 07:20 (three years ago) link

two weeks pass...

hilarious conversation with my mum over Christmas, while out walking. she was asking me how I was etc and I said oh god you know ok, terrified of dying from time to time, especially when I consider dad died at me +12 years and we're v much the same genetically and in patterns of behaviour etc and I said what about you? are you scared of dying? and she sad 'god no, I'm scared of living too long. I don't want to live as long as my mother (93 and still going, though the short-term memory's fucked). I'm just frightened I'm going to outlive my sons.' (she has reason, which I won't go into here, but which doesn't involve me, other than in my fears). Anyway, we agreed to split the difference, which should work out well for both of us.

In fact although I'm periodically paralysed by fear of death, I mean literally paralysed in the form of a panic attack, there are other times that it seems ok, nbd, and it's only really pain that I fear. I try not to think about it.

There were two other things that brought this conversation to mind recently - one was Ernest Shackleton's letter to Winston Churchill, who he was trying to convince to back his Imperial Trans-Antarctic Expedition, where he says 'Death is really a very little thing and Knowledge very great' and I thought when I read that that if he had not been a person for whom death was a very little thing, he would not have been able to survive with his team stranded two years in Antarctica or travel 750 miles in a five man boat to get rescue. They returned to a world where death was not at all a very little thing and was in fact in the process of slaughtering an entire generation.

the other was the review by Adam Mars-Jones in the LRB of Grief is a Many Feathered Thing by Max Porter (might be paywalled, sorry), which quote this journal entry by Emerson after the death of his five-year-old son Waldo:

What he looked upon is better; what he looked not upon is insignificant. The morning of Friday, I woke at three o’clock, and every cock in every barnyard was shrilling with the most unnecessary noise. The sun went up the morning sky with all his light, but the landscape was dishonoured by this loss. For this boy, in whose remembrance I have both slept and awaked so oft, decorated for me the morning star, the evening cloud, how much more all the particulars of daily economy; for he had touched with his lively curiosity every trivial fact and circumstance in the household, the hard coal and the soft coal which I put into my stove; the wood, of which he brought his little quota for grandmother’s fire; the hammer, the pincers and file he was so eager to use; the microscope, the magnet, the little globe, and every trinket and instrument in the study; the loads of gravel on the meadow, the nests in the hen-house, and many and many a little visit to the dog-house and to the barn. – For everything he had his own name and way of thinking, his own pronunciation and manner. And every word came mended from that tongue …

It seems as if I ought to call upon the winds to describe my boy, my fast receding boy, a child of so large and generous a nature that I cannot paint him by specialties, as I might another … He named the parts of the toy house he was always building by fancy names which had a good sound, as ‘the interspeglium’ and ‘the corigada’, which names, he told Margaret, ‘the children could not understand.’

If I go down to the bottom of the garden it seems as if some one had fallen into the brook.

So when I've stopped fearing death out of fear of pain and annihilation, I then go on to fearing it because of the absence of people I love, which isn't intended to be too pompous, but also include getting pissed down the pub with friends, laughing, going to sporting events, holding someone I love very close etc etc.

trying to pretend it doesn't exist doesn't seem to work either.

Fizzles, Sunday, 31 January 2016 17:56 (three years ago) link

dude, finish your novel!

ZESTY O'PRIDE (imago), Sunday, 31 January 2016 18:10 (three years ago) link

i'm not sure that anything really works - there are people who have the terror you're describing and i'm far too familiar with, and people who just don't really have that same fear. or at least i believe them when they tell me that.

so i dunno about you Fizzles, but i get by thru a little avoidance, a little forgetting, and a little getting better at recognizing the moods and moments that will trigger the big waves of fear that (used to) swallow me so fast and whole that i wanted to jump out of bed and run round the house and into the street and keep running until i passed out. the subtle gradations and variations and transferences of the fear have been...interesting...to observe as i've got older i guess.

but short of some magic White Noise pill i don't really know how to make it stop either, and i wonder how much it's messed with my general demeanour over the course of near-40 years

Chikan wa akan de. Zettai akan de. (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 31 January 2016 18:18 (three years ago) link

or just maybe: you can take the edge off the fear by letting go of your affection for all of the things that you're afraid death will take from you forever

which largely feels like a bullshit solution tbh

Chikan wa akan de. Zettai akan de. (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 31 January 2016 18:20 (three years ago) link

"attachments are bullshit"
- buddha marley

lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, 31 January 2016 20:49 (three years ago) link

so i dunno about you Fizzles, but i get by thru a little avoidance, a little forgetting, and a little getting better at recognizing the moods and moments that will trigger the big waves of fear

yep this. want to stress I'm not paralysed by fear regularly, just every now and then, and it's more a point of curiosity or interest than anything else. I'm not a particularly morbid person - it's more a larkinesque domestic version of the void that hapoens at night, or something akin to vertigo. but obv not enormously pleasant while it's happening.

Fizzles, Sunday, 31 January 2016 22:54 (three years ago) link

"attachments are bullshit"
- buddha marley

― lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, January 31, 2016 3:49 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sometimes I feel like as I age I know less rather than more, but this is one thing I have learned with age is surely not true.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Monday, 1 February 2016 02:24 (three years ago) link

phbbt speak for yourself

lute bro (brimstead), Monday, 1 February 2016 03:57 (three years ago) link

amateurist wrote upthread:

so how does consciousness deal with the timelessness of death? does it create an artificial sensation on a sort of "loop," that is experienced as if eternal? does the last moment of experience resonate eternally?

^^this is my biggest fear re: death, i suppose.

i'm not a very ambitious fellow, i don't experience #FOMO. but i'm worried that at some point a switch will flip and i'll be like "OH SHIT WHY DIDN'T I DO THIS AND THIS AND THIS WHILE I WAS YOUNG, I COULD HAVE GONE SO MUCH FURTHER"

man alive's last post has been haunting me, lol.

lute bro (brimstead), Sunday, 7 February 2016 22:25 (three years ago) link

i suspect timelessness is v different from an infinite loop of some of temporality or another

rap is dad (it's a boy!), Monday, 8 February 2016 16:44 (three years ago) link

If our consciousness had the luxury of existing after death, only then would the idea of eternity be frightening to me. Instead I terrify and confuse myself as I attempt to process what it means to not have any layer of thought left to reflect on any version of my existence.

Evan, Monday, 8 February 2016 17:00 (three years ago) link

three years pass...

some nights this shit stops me from sleeping. then I just put on another episode of the Simpsons.

Jordan Pickford LOLverdrive (Neanderthal), Saturday, 30 November 2019 04:56 (one week ago) link

seems like a wise enough response, unless fear of death is something of a recurrent problem for you. in which case it wouldn't kill you to sit with it a bit and see what turns up. it's the universe's favorite koan.

A is for (Aimless), Saturday, 30 November 2019 06:38 (one week ago) link

It's a good laxative.

Also good perspective for when something non-lethal is befalling you. "Least I'm not fucking dying".

Other than that I'm not a fan.

#FBPIRA (jim in vancouver), Saturday, 30 November 2019 06:44 (one week ago) link

i get by thru a little avoidance, a little forgetting, and a little getting better at recognizing the moods and moments that will trigger the big waves of fear that (used to) swallow me so fast and whole that i wanted to jump out of bed and run round the house and into the street and keep running until i passed out.

^^^ thanks to NV for writing this, especially the bit about 'moods and moments'. I really only get fear of death when I'm tired and/or stressed out over something that I can't do anything about. All the thousands of ways I can't do what I want - that are nebulous and myriad and impossible to consciously keep track of much less do anything about - get solidified into a fear of death, which is at least something concrete and can be reacted to (even if the reaction is fear).

just another country (snoball), Saturday, 30 November 2019 22:08 (one week ago) link


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